Chapter 1
12/10/20XX
Sigh!! Sometimes it all feels too much and I'm tempted to just let go. But for the fact that I have Maami to take care of, I must not give up, I cannot give up, I cannot let Maami down. Times like this make me remember the saying "if life throws you lemons, make lemonade out of it". Turns out making lemonade is not so easy. As a 25 year old upcoming photographer, I'm somewhat considered "fresh blood" in the industry but photography gigs are hard to come by these days.
Is it the fact that customers these days are unwilling to hire 'new' photographers and when they do hire us pay us mere crumbs, or the fact that the veterans in the industry snatch up all available gigs leaving no chances for people like me to fight for recognition. Three difficult years of working multiple jobs in order to afford the photography training fee is about to go down the drain.
Amina lowered her pen slowly and stared at the page for a moment longer before closing the small worn diary. The room was quiet except for the faint hum of a struggling ceiling fan that rotated lazily above her head.
Her camera sat on the table across the room, untouched for days.
It had not always been like this.
There was a time when she could not go a single day without holding it, adjusting the lens, chasing light like it was something she could trap and keep for herself. Now it felt heavy, like a reminder of something she was slowly losing.
A soft cough came from the adjoining room.
Amina's head snapped up immediately.
She stood and walked quickly into the small bedroom where her mother lay resting. Maami shifted slightly on the bed, her frail frame barely moving under the thin wrapper that covered her.
"I am fine," Maami said weakly, even though Amina had not asked.
Amina forced a small smile and nodded. "You should rest more."
She adjusted the pillow gently and made sure the water beside the bed was within reach before stepping back. For a moment, she just stood there, watching her mother breathe.
That alone was enough to keep her going.
Back in the main room, her phone buzzed against the table.
Amina rushed to pick it up, hope rising quickly in her chest. Maybe it was a client. Maybe it was finally something. She opened the message.
Her expression fell. It was from a potential client she had spoken to two days ago.
We have decided to go with someone more experienced. Thank you.
Amina read it again, slower this time, as if the words might change. They did not. Her grip tightened slightly around the phone before she dropped it back onto the table. She let out a breath she did not realize she had been holding and sank into the chair.
More experienced.
It was always the same thing. If they did not reject her, they underpaid her. If they did not underpay her, they replaced her. And if by some miracle they accepted her, it was never enough to cover anything meaningful.
Her gaze drifted back to the camera.
Three years.
Three years of working exhausting jobs, saving every possible naira, denying herself comfort just to afford training. Three years of believing that one day it would all make sense.
Now she was not so sure.
Outside, the city moved on as usual. Cars passed. Voices echoed faintly from the street. Life continued, fast and unbothered.
Amina stood abruptly and walked to the door. She needed air. Needed to clear her head before her thoughts swallowed her whole. The sun was beginning it's slow descent, painting the sky in streaks of gold and orange. She stepped out and walked to the small bench under a mango tree near her building. Sitting down, she let the warm breeze wash over her.
"Hey Amina!"
She looked up to see her neighbor , Temi, bounding over with the kind of energy Amina both admired and envied. Temi was dressed in office attire, hair perfectly done, and carrying a small paper bag. She smiled brightly as she reached the bench.
"You will not believe what just happened!" Temi said, almost squealing with excitement. "I got promoted today! Finally, all my prayers have been answered!"
Amina tried to muster a smile and clapped lightly. "Wow, that is really... great, Temi."
Temi leaned closer, whispering conspiratorially. "I know right, it feels like the universe finally noticed me. I have been working so hard, and today it all paid off. You have to believe in your prayers, Amina. Things do happen." She dug into the paper bag and handed Amina a small wrapped package. "I got you something too. Just a little something for all your hard work."
Amina opened it to find a neatly wrapped meat pie and a small packet of juice. Her stomach tightened. The gesture was small but kind, and it reminded her that someone else was watching, someone else cared.
"Thanks, Temi," she said softly, trying to hide the mix of gratitude and envy.
Temi bounced slightly on her heels. "No problem! You are going to make it too, I know you will. I see your talent. Don't give up like I almost did sometimes. Keep pushing."
Amina nodded, feeling a spark of warmth amidst the lingering frustration. Temi left soon after, waving cheerfully as she disappeared around the corner towards her flat. Sitting back on the bench, Amina took a slow breath. Watching the people pass, the honking buses, the chaotic but alive streets, she felt a little lighter.
Maybe making lemonade was hard. Maybe life was messy. But perhaps... there was a way forward yet.
