Chapter 1
I do miss you, even though you were the worst memory I ever had.
I wish I could forget you. You were the best and the worst at the same time. Yes, you did hurt me, but maybe I just got used to the pain. The moment you slipped away without giving any warning, I knew the glass was close to breaking, but I guess I never followed my intuition. I just trusted you way too much.
What did I gain from loving you? That, I can't tell. The love I had for you was something I never even gave myself. I thought you were the warm space I needed in my life, but I guess you were just a phase in it.
I hope that one day, when I open my eyes, all the scars will be gone. Because loving you was one of the medications I took to an overdose.
I'm too much, yet I'm enough. Because you promised you wouldn't give up. But here I am, standing all alone under this rain, my makeup completely washed away. You never raised your hands on me, but your silence killed me. All the time, you put your phone on silent, and when I asked, you said you just wanted time with me. But all this time, you were cheating.
Yes, you did tell me that you could never love me the way I wanted. But I always thought time would change that. I don't really blame you; I just blame myself for falling so hard for a guy who warned me.
I feel so stupid because, despite the damage you caused me, I still crave your attention. I need your hugs to fall asleep. What am I doing?
What was all this for? Was it just a moment or a memory? Because my heart held on way too tightly. If I were given another chance, I bet I would come back. But I'm happy that I'm slowly slipping away.
