Between Rain and Fog

Rain had a strange way of making everything look new.

The trees looked greener, the roads looked cleaner, and even the city seemed quieter under a grey sky.

I sat by the car window, my printed backpack resting on my lap, and watched raindrops race each other down the glass.

I was twelve years old.

And I was terrified.

After two years of online classes and staying at home, I was finally going to school again.

Not my old school.

A completely new school.

A completely new beginning.

I tightened my grip on my backpack.

Inside it were six notebooks, three textbooks, four blue pens, two black pens, one red pen, two pencils, an eraser, a sharpener, highlighters, sticky notes, glue, scissors, a ruler, a colour box, extra refills, a small fruit box, my water bottle, and my tiffin.

My mother often laughed and said I carried my entire room inside my bag.

I liked being prepared.

What if someone needed a pen?

What if I forgot something?

What if I needed an extra notebook?

What if I had to draw something?

I always carried everything.

Even my worries.

The car stopped at a traffic signal.

I looked outside.

Students wearing sky-blue uniforms were crossing the road with their umbrellas.

They looked so comfortable.

So normal.

As if going to school after two years was the easiest thing in the world.

I swallowed.

What if everyone already had friends?

What if I sat alone during lunch?

What if I couldn't understand anything in class?

What if everyone was smarter than me?

I had barely studied during online classes.

Science and Social Science still sounded like mysterious worlds to me.

Mathematics frightened me the most.

I wasn't stupid.

I knew that.

But I felt left behind.

As if everyone had kept walking while I had accidentally stopped.

My mother turned around from the front seat.

"Nervous?" she asked.

I immediately shook my head.

"No."

A lie.

A complete lie.

My stomach hurt.

My palms were sweaty.

And I had already imagined at least twenty embarrassing situations.

A few minutes later, the school building appeared.

I stared at it.

It was much bigger than I had imagined.

The white building stood behind black iron gates, and students were walking through the corridors, talking and laughing.

I suddenly wanted to go home.

I wanted to tell my parents that I would start tomorrow.

Or next week.

Or maybe next month.

The admission procedure took some time.

I sat quietly in the office while my parents filled forms and talked to the staff.

Outside, rain continued to fall softly.

I watched the droplets slide down the window.

The office smelled faintly of paper and tea.

I looked at my new identity card.

My photograph looked nervous.

I almost laughed.

Then one of the office staff smiled.

"Would you like her to attend class today or from tomorrow?"

My heart immediately started praying.

Tomorrow.

Please say tomorrow.

Please.

My parents looked at each other.

Then my father smiled.

"I think she should go today."

I forgot how to breathe.

Today?

Right now?

I wasn't ready.

I didn't even know where my classroom was.

I didn't know anybody.

I didn't know what chapter they were studying.

I didn't know anything.

A helper came to take me to my class.

I stood up slowly.

My backpack suddenly felt ten times heavier.

I looked at my parents.

They smiled at me.

My mother fixed a few strands of hair near my forehead.

"You'll be fine."

I nodded.

Another lie.

I wasn't fine.

Not even a little.

I followed the helper outside.

The corridor was long and bright.

Students were standing near classroom doors.

Some were laughing.

Some were running.

Some were discussing homework.

The sound of their voices echoed around me.

I felt small.

I had forgotten what schools felt like.

For two years, my world had been phone screens, online classes, and staying at home.

And now I was here.

A stranger.

In a new school.

On a rainy day.

The helper stopped near a classroom.

I looked at the brown wooden door.

Voices came from inside.

Laughter.

A teacher's voice.

The turning of notebook pages.

My heartbeat became louder.

I adjusted my backpack straps.

I suddenly became aware of everything.

My wet shoes.

My messy thoughts.

My nervous breathing.

The fact that I knew absolutely nobody inside.

The helper knocked.

"Ma'am, the new student."

A voice from inside replied,

"Send her in."

The door opened.

I stepped inside.

Thirty pairs of eyes turned towards me.

Everything became silent.

I froze.

Every single student was staring at me.

Who is she?

That's what their faces seemed to ask.

I suddenly forgot where to look.

At the teacher?

At the floor?

At the desks?

At my shoes?

I didn't know.

The teacher smiled kindly.

"Come in."

I walked forward.

Each step felt awkward.

I could hear my own heartbeat.

"Introduce yourself."

My mind went blank.

I knew my name.

I knew my father's name.

I knew where I lived.

Yet somehow I forgot everything.

I took a deep breath.

"Good morning, ma'am."

My voice sounded smaller than usual.

"My name is Aarohi Sharma. I am twelve years old and… and I recently took admission here."

A few students smiled.

A few kept staring.

I wished the floor would open and swallow me.

The teacher nodded.

"Welcome to the class, Aarohi."

She looked around.

"Find a seat for her."

I looked at the rows of desks.

Everyone suddenly seemed like they already belonged.

I was the only missing piece.

A girl shifted slightly to make space.

Another smiled politely.

Someone whispered something.

Someone else looked curious.

I slowly walked toward an empty seat in the middle row.

My backpack landed on the desk with a soft thud.

I sat down.

I looked around carefully.

New faces.

New voices.

New uniforms.

New everything.

Outside, rain tapped softly against the windows.

Inside, my heart still hadn't calmed down.

I had no idea that this classroom would soon become my favourite place.

I had no idea that these strangers would become my friends, my memories, and my heartbreaks.

I had no idea that these corridors would witness my laughter, my tears, my first real friendships, and my silent crushes.

At that moment, I was simply a twelve-year-old girl in a sky-blue uniform, sitting in a new classroom with a backpack full of stationery and a head full of worries.

And without knowing it—

I had just stepped into the three years that would change my life forever.