Different Beasts

He watched the collision in slow motion. Like something on a movie screen, Albert Brown didn’t realize the sensation of pins and needles that prickled in his body until he slammed back into it. The hand that skirted the gash on Albert’s forehead didn’t belong to him.

No matter how many times he blinked, he didn’t recognize the swollen fingers that the signet cut into. He turned to the passenger seat with a groan. Finding it empty made Albert’s chest tighten. The seat belt had already cut through the black button-down shirt, which was matted to his skin, and he marveled at how much damage a person could sustain in a few short seconds.

None of it registered as he searched for his partner.

“Devon?” Even his voice sounded strange.

A knock sounded at the window. Ignoring the well-meaning advice for him to remain inside until an emergency vehicle arrived, Albert swung his legs from the driver’s seat. They buckled. He snatched at the crumpled hood to try to stop himself from face-planting. The gust of cold air made his eyes burn, and the pain smoldering in his limbs increased in intensity.

The other driver recoiled. Albert massaged his chest, trying to loosen the knot there, then glared at the short, spiky-haired man in a cheap, polyester work uniform. The man shifted his weight from one leg to the other.

“Christ, man. Are you alright? You came at me out of nowhere.”

“Where is he?” he demanded.

“I didn’t see anybody else.” The stranger raised his hands.

“I don’t have time for this,” Albert muttered.

He doubted the other man saw anything with the cigarette dangling between his lips. He tucked his face toward his shoulder to light it when Albert hit the brakes. Though he tried to veer out of harm’s way, it hadn’t done much good. And where the hell had Devon gone?

“Honest to God, you were in the car by yourself. I would know if somebody went airborne.” He swallowed hard, but the windshield hadn’t been broken despite the fractals in the glass and the shards that gouged Albert’s hands.

“Your wife is going to meet you at the hospital,” said the cyclist who instructed him not to move.

“You talked to her?”

“I asked if you wanted me to contact anybody.”

Albert didn’t have the energy to argue. Even though he had been sure he heard a rumble of laughter from across the console as Devon reached a hand for his thigh, he couldn’t remember much else before the collision. Maybe he left a piece of himself behind when he stepped out of his body.

His target escaped. The realization bit into Albert with the same sharpness as the gust of wind that buffeted the driver’s door. Devon hadn’t survived the head-on collision, but it had nothing to do with the SUV that flipped and did a tailspin into the guardrail. Somebody put a bullet between those beautiful green eyes.

Albert vowed that anybody involved in his lover’s death would pay. He didn’t know how to live with the ache in his chest, as if the world had rotated away from its axis and every day things no longer made sense. How could he exist in a world without Devon?

By the time the emergency squad arrived, Albert’s temper flared alongside the throbbing in his skull. He swatted away the hand that helped lower him onto the gurney. They swabbed his forehead with a gauze pad. The harsh smell of antiseptic made Albert’s nostrils twitch, and the teakwood-scented body spray didn’t do anything to help his headache.

He couldn’t concentrate. The paramedics crowded the ambulance. A pair of navy-clad legs stood at eye level with Albert, who felt a blush color his cheeks as fingers inspected the shredded flesh beneath a damp lock of hair.

“How are you feeling, Mr. Brown? Can you tell me how many fingers I’m holding up?”

When the bicyclist asked Albert which of his contacts he wanted to meet, Albert gave the perfunctory answer. Jesenia agreed to meet him at the emergency room.

Her dark hair spilled past her shoulder as she hitched the strap of her purse higher. She pursed her lips as she took in Albert’s bruised and swollen face.

“I’m glad you’re alright,” she said after a terse silence. “This couldn’t have waited until after the dinner party?”

“I’m sorry. I forgot.” Albert did his best to look contrite.

“I should be able to come up with an excuse for your absence while you recover.”

Jesenia and her damn dinner parties were the bane of Albert’s existence. The plastic identification band made his wrist itch. His legs swung from the gurney while he waited for the nurse to return, trying to bite back a retort.

They agreed before exchanging their vows that Jesenia would be allowed to host. With Albert’s permission, she chose local charities to partner with. The volunteers and board members were as much her coworkers as they were her friends.

She pursed her dark red lips and gave Albert a once-over. The wrinkles around the corners of Jesenia’s eyes were more prominent, and when she uncrossed her legs, the black halter dress crinkled against the vinyl cushion. She would have to retrieve her evening gown from the dry cleaner after finalizing the menu. Though Albert didn’t understand the appeal, he didn’t want to disappoint Jesenia. She had been his rock in the months since Devon’s death.

“I could ask them to take a rain check, but they’re sponsoring updated equipment for the animal hospital.”

“I should be well enough to join you,” said Albert, keeping his voice neutral. “Once they rule out a concussion, I’ll send for a driver. Why don’t you make sure you have everything you need?”

“Thank you. Your suit will be laid out for you when you arrive.” She planted a kiss against Albert’s forehead, and the smell of gardenias washed over him. Jesenia hitched her purse up her shoulder. Her nylons swished as she strode from the room, already stabbing at her keypad with a finger.

He would style his hair to hide the nicks and scrapes. Maybe taking a break wasn’t such a bad idea.

He couldn’t afford to get sloppy.

Albert stared at the spot she had left. He didn’t think he would ever be able to fill the hole in his heart. Even if he succeeded in punishing everybody who played a role in Devon’s death, it wouldn’t bring the other man back. It didn’t change the fact that he needed Albert—and Albert failed him.