One
Family was complicated. James was starting to understand that.
Family expected things from you. They pushed you to be better. They hovered too much, teased too hard, argued too easily, and somehow still loved you through all of it.
That was what he noticed as he watched Jake, Lydia, Colter, and Joseph move around one another. It was second nature to them. They didn’t have to think about where they stood or what role they played. They already knew. Each of them had a place in the rhythm of that family, and none of them seemed to question whether they belonged there.
James didn’t have that. Not even with his father. Now he was supposed to figure out how he fit with Joseph. With Jake. With all of them. They might have been brothers by blood, but there was more to being real brothers than that. James wasn’t sure he had any right to be that with either of them. Especially Joseph.
After all, Joseph had been hurt because of him. James had arranged for him to be taken. Eddie had stabbed him. No matter how many times Joseph acted like he was ready to move past it, James wasn’t sure he could.
Now he stood in the kitchen of the apartment he had rented, watching Joseph move into it with him.
Roommates. Maybe that was all they would ever be. Maybe that was all James deserved.
“You know, it’s kind of sad that all of your things fit into three large boxes your roommate could mail to you,” Colter said, carrying one of those boxes as he followed Joseph into the bedroom Joseph was taking.
Joseph glanced back at him, carrying a box of his own. Jake followed behind with the third and final one.
“Sad? Please. This is efficient. Some people need a moving truck. I need postage.”
Jake laughed, and the three of them disappeared into the bedroom to set the boxes on the floor.
Joseph paused inside the room, taking in the bed, the dresser, the nightstand, and even the lamp sitting beside the mattress. James had furnished the apartment for both of them because Joseph had no money, and James still had some saved from his previous life.
The one that had made him a lot of money. The one that had required immunity in exchange for his testimony against his father.
Joseph came back out and looked at James. “Thanks for the furniture.”
James only nodded.
Joseph glanced back toward the bedroom. “You bought me mood lighting too? James, this is moving very fast.”
James gave a half smile, but he wasn’t sure how to respond. This entire thing made him feel oddly uncomfortable. Not because he didn’t want to do it. He did. It had been his idea. He just had no idea what he was doing.
Jake came out of the bedroom and rested a hand on Joseph’s shoulder. “How’s the job hunting going?”
Joseph looked at the hand on his shoulder, then at Jake. “Wow. We’ve been in the apartment twelve minutes and you’ve already found the interrogation setting.”
“I’m not interrogating you,” Jake said. “I’m trying to make sure you don’t wait until rent is due to remember money is unfortunately required for adulthood.”
Joseph gave him a smug look. “I was hoping adulthood had a grace period. Like a free trial, but with fewer emails.”
“Make jokes, but you need to man up here, kid.” Jake pointed at him.
Colter leaned against the door frame. “Careful, Joseph. He’s using the dad voice. Next thing you know, you’ll have life goals.”
Joseph pointed at Colter. “See? This is why I like him. He recognizes danger before it becomes a five-year plan.”
“Hey, don’t come crying to me when James asks you for rent and you don’t have it,” Jake said.
James stood back and watched them go back and forth. He almost didn’t want Jake and Colter to leave, because then it would be just him and Joseph, and he had no clue how to carry that conversation on his own.
“All right,” Jake said. “We need to get going. We’re supposed to be helping your mom get ready for the barbecue this evening.” He pushed Colter toward the door.
Then he looked at James. “You know, you’re welcome to come. Lydia’s brother and his family just moved to town, and we’d like to introduce you to them.”
James shifted his weight. “I don’t know. I’ll think about it.”
“If he gets out of it, then I should too,” Joseph said.
“You’re not getting out of anything.” Jake looked at Joseph with a raised brow and the determination of an older brother who wasn’t accepting no for an answer. “You’ll be there.”
James looked at Joseph, expecting him to bite back or get defensive at the tone. But Joseph only smiled.
“Got it. I’ll be there.”
“Good. Call me if you need anything,” Jake said as he and Colter headed for the door.
“I just moved ten miles across town, Jake. You didn’t drop me off at summer camp.”
“With Dad, that’s basically the same thing,” Colter said, grinning.
Jake shook his head and pushed Colter through the doorway. “Okay, I’m tired of you two ganging up on me. Let’s go.”
The door closed behind them. And it was like someone raised the awkward flag. A strange kind of stiffness fell over the whole apartment.
Joseph turned to face James. “So. This should be fun.”
James nodded, but he didn’t exactly smile. This didn’t feel like fun. It felt more like torture. Like he had been dropped into another country where he didn’t speak the language or understand the culture.
“Don’t look so excited, James. You’re making me nervous.” Joseph grinned.
“You hungry?” James asked, walking to the fridge just to shift the conversation to something he might survive.
Joseph followed him into the kitchen and leaned against the counter. “Was that a roommate question or a brother question?”
James looked at him and frowned. “It was a food question.”
“Yeah, but food with concern behind it.” Joseph tipped his head, clearly reading the room and the awkwardness James couldn’t seem to hide. “That’s advanced stuff.”
James closed the fridge. “There’s nothing in here to eat anyway.”
“You going to be like this all the time?”
“Be like what?”
“Like you don’t know how to talk to me.” Joseph folded his arms. “You were doing much better when I was in the hospital a couple weeks ago.”
James sighed and opened the pantry door, looking for absolutely nothing. “How about you take the top shelf of the fridge, and I’ll take the bottom.”
Joseph huffed out a small laugh and looked at the floor. “Sure. Maybe we should label every item in the kitchen with our names too. I’ll buy a label maker.”
James looked at him. “Okay. We can do that.”
Joseph laughed harder. “I was kidding, James. Come on. Lighten up. We’re not on some compound. We’re just two brothers sharing an apartment.”
James’s shoulders lifted a little at the word. Brother. He still wasn’t used to hearing it. Not directed at him.
“I’m working on figuring it out,” James said.
“You’re working at it a little too hard.”
“Joseph, you might understand what it’s like to be someone’s brother. I don’t. Let alone one I’m responsible for putting in the hospital in the first place.”
Joseph’s smile faded. He looked away. “You’ve got to let that go, James. I have.”
James didn’t answer.
Joseph looked back at him. “You may have started that situation, but you’re also the one who carried me out of there and called Jake.” A faint smile pulled at his mouth. “So you’re kind of the villain turned hero. Those are usually some of the best movies.”
James walked past him and headed back into the living room. “Rent’s due on the fifth. If we split it fifty-fifty, your half is four-fifty.”
Joseph sighed. “Straight to business, huh? We kind of already had this discussion.”
James turned to face him again. “I’m trying, Joseph. Just give me time to adjust to having a roommate before I can adjust to having a brother.”
Joseph nodded. “Right.”
That stung more than he expected. He hadn’t realized there was going to be a fence to climb before they could reach brother territory.
But he knew when to stop pushing. And James clearly wasn’t ready to be his brother yet.
