Chapter 1
Tessa sighed and set her phone down on the kitchen counter.
She didn’t want to deal with that asshole Derrick right now. All she wanted was to crack open a tub of her favorite pistachio ice cream, curl up in front of her laptop, and lose herself in her favorite porn site.
Yes, you heard that right.
No one would ever have guessed. To everyone else, Tessa was a cold-hearted, unapproachable bitch who didn’t know how to have fun. In reality, she had a healthy appetite for life… and for sex.
The only problem was that she hadn’t met the right partner yet. Someone she could explore all the things she secretly wanted to try.
Besides, she doubted anyone would benefit from knowing exactly what turned her on. Those desires belonged to a darker, more private corner of herself, one she preferred to keep hidden.
The young woman cast one last deadpan glance at her phone when another irritating email notification chimed. Honestly, she didn’t even know why she paid an entire team to assist her. Somehow, she still ended up dealing with everything herself because half the messages that landed in her inbox involved problems her employees apparently weren’t qualified to handle.
Maybe her company needed a different management approach.
Or maybe it needed an entirely new team.
The truth was, Tessa needed a vacation. Desperately.
She loved her work, but lately it had become exhausting.
When she’d first started building her kink-oriented dating website, she had never imagined it would grow into the thriving company it was today. It had brought her success, wealth, and more opportunities than she’d ever dreamed of.
But she’d completely underestimated the pressure that came with being the person in charge. And she certainly hadn’t expected to spend so much of her time fending off wealthy creeps like Derrick, who seemed incapable of taking “no” for an answer.
She was certain he still held a grudge over her latest rejection. The man treated rejection like a loyalty program. Six attempts in and he still thought the next one came with a prize. She was already sick of hearing his endless comments about her breasts and no, she‘d never be desperate enough to sleep with him.
Not when she could satisfy herself perfectly well.
As long as a tub of pistachio ice cream waited patiently in the freezer, all she needed to feel good was that, a glass of wine, her own hand, and her favorite creator on the site:
Lostboy.
She adored that man.
Tessa quickly silenced her phone, opened her laptop, and settled comfortably in front of the screen with her ice cream and a glass of wine.
The moment she sat down, she navigated straight to Lostboy’s profile, where she knew all the best content would be waiting.
She wasn’t entirely sure why she was so obsessed with the man.
Was it the mask, with its irresistible air of mystery?
The way it revealed nothing but his full lips and sharply defined jawline?
Or perhaps it was his expressive gray eyes, which squeezed shut whenever another man took him from behind, tears clinging to his thick black lashes.
Maybe it was that tiny, bratty smirk he wore after every particularly intense scene.
That single smile awakened an almost unbearable urge to punish him herself every damn time.
She was convinced Lostboy would be the death of her one day.
Every time she looked at him, even for a second, a wave of excitement rushed through her, leaving her body burning with anticipation. If she were ever lucky enough to meet him in person, she was certain she’d make a complete fool of herself within the first few seconds.
As she shamelessly touched herself to his deep, husky sounds of pleasure, her imagination ran wild, wondering what it would be like to meet him in real life.
The chat beneath his videos was always active, overflowing with users begging to meet him, but he never replied.
Why would he?
He was insanely popular and probably didn’t have the time to read even a fraction of the messages. Besides, most of them were probably sketchy anyway.
There wasn’t even an option to send him a private message, making the fantasy of contacting him feel completely pointless.
Not that Tessa would have done it if she could.
Ironically, she was the CEO of a successful kink-oriented dating platform, yet deep down she was still the quiet, shy girl she’d been in high school.
The fat girl, to be exact.
The one who had learned never to meet anyone’s eyes because she didn’t want them to notice her or comment on the shape of her body.
Even now, after losing the weight, she sometimes still felt like that same insecure girl.
She scooped up another spoonful of pistachio ice cream and nearly moaned at the rich sweetness melting on her tongue, perfectly in sync with the sounds coming from her laptop.
Today’s video featured Lostboy wearing a slim, golden jockstrap that left almost nothing to the imagination. The shimmering fabric framed his body in elegant, teasing lines, while an opening at the front revealed him completely. It was remarkable how such a small, seemingly impractical piece of clothing could transform the entire scene. Rather than concealing anything, it drew the eye exactly where it wanted, making the performance feel even more intimate and artfully composed.
To Tessa, it was beautiful.
Lostboy let out a particularly sharp moan, and she immediately knew the unseen hands behind him had found exactly what they were looking for. Her entire body tensed at the thought of what the camera wasn’t showing, her imagination eagerly filling in the gaps.
His expressive gray eyes shimmered with fresh tears before drifting downward, his face flushing with obvious vulnerability.
“Shh, baby,” the unseen man said in a low, husky voice. “You know you have to stay quiet for this part.”
Lostboy answered with a soft, pitiful whimper before obediently falling silent, his body growing almost perfectly still.
“Good boy,” the older man murmured, clearly pleased. “Look at the camera. That’s it. Don’t hide. Don’t be shy. They’re all here for you, baby. Watching you. Admiring you.”
And Tessa certainly admired him.
Completely absorbed by the performance on her screen, she could already feel the tension inside her building to its peak.
A flicker of embarrassment crossed Lostboy’s face, no doubt stirred by the whispered praise, before his full lips slowly parted. His breathing became uneven, each breath shorter and more unsteady than the last.
“Come on, baby. You can do it,” his partner groaned, his arm moving steadily behind the younger man. “Just one last push.”
With one final, deliberate thrust, both men on the screen went completely still.
Tessa’s pulse pounded in her ears.
“Fuck,” she breathed.
It was too much.
Too much anticipation.
Too much pleasure.
Too much stimulation.
Her body trembled as the tension she’d been building toward finally snapped. Wave after wave of pleasure rolled through her, leaving her breathless as she surrendered to the moment.
For several long seconds, she remained frozen, caught in the warm haze that followed.
She barely registered the video still playing in front of her.
Then, somewhere beyond the ringing in her ears, a notification chimed.
Not from her phone this time.
But from her laptop.
