VISION OF RAVANA

These are the days when warmth seeps through the window amidst the cold. The surface is exceptionally cold. The seasons here vary from time to time. During the sunny season, it gets so scorching hot that one might think their body is catching fire. During the snowfall season, it is unbearably cold. To be precise, we get the experience of Africa and Iceland for free, courtesy of two seasons of the year.

​Today, too, that familiar alarm clock used to wake up Nicholas’s little brother, Smith, rings out in the house of Nicholas, where I currently live. That is the voice of Nicholas’s mother.

​“I will not be here by the next winter.”

​Releasing a very long sigh, I thought to myself while still sipping my morning cup of coffee near the room’s window. My deep exhale caused water vapor to condense on the window glass, and I leaned in closer to exhale onto the glass again and again, as I loved writing on it once the vapor settled.

​I wrote on it: “NASA.”

​That is the dream I behold.

It is not only my dream, but also that of Nicholas, myself, and any student I currently associate with. At times, that dream felt so far out of reach for me. However, I decided to live by imagining it as a dream coming true right before my eyes, because “the farther a dream is, the more exhausted you become from running hard to catch it, making you want to give up. But a dream within sight will never let us lose focus on our goal.” Therefore, it is my habit to draw a rocket alongside the name “NASA” everywhere I look.

​At the front of any of my books, there stands an astronaut. On one side of it, I drew a rocket and wrote “I am coming, NASA,” with great passion and in the hopeful spirit of wishing that dream to come true.

Nicholas’s brother also loved my books dearly. Even though he was not my biological brother, he was like a real brother to me. He would constantly say, “Brother, you will definitely go to NASA. When you get there, can you please take a video call from the moon and show it to me?” He kept pleading like that, and I would agree with him. While agreeing, I helped him with his schoolwork and assisted him in completing his homework. That was because Nicholas’s family never charged me anything, even though I was staying at their home.

Nicholas and Smith are like two different planets. Nicholas pursues his education due to his parents’ wealth and their insistence. He is highly impulsive, stubborn, and rebellious, yet he is a very good friend. On the other hand, although Smith is littel , he is an obedient, patient little child who longs for love, and he is quite talented in art. Smith bonded with me more than with Nicholas because I, too, am patient like him. He shared and talked about many things with me.

​Whenever I spent days wrestling with unsolved math problems, Smith would come into my room to keep me company. Without causing any disturbance, he would quietly go to sleep. At those moments, I would catch myself wishing, “If only I had a brother like this.” Finding renewed strength within myself, I would then get back to my work.

​These days, I come to the university with great joy. That is because during these cold days, just like back when I was in my village, smoke trails out when I lift my face up and exhale.

​So, this is the final year passing by at the university. After today, the Christmas vacation begins. These days are meant for working tirelessly for the sake of my dream. I learned from a senior at Harvard University that NASA is currently recruiting new members. Thus, along with other friends, Nicholas and I submitted our applications as well. As far as I know, Nicholas’s uncle his mother’s brother also works as a scientist at NASA. Nicholas mentioned this to me during our early days of getting to know each other when we first met.

​Now, with our degree wrapping up in a few months, our student visas are also set to expire. However, if I am able to get selected for NASA, I can find a way to stay back here.

Before meeting Nicholas, I paid for my hostel using my student allowance. From the menu I selected, I constantly had only a bowl of soup for my meals. However, the energy I got from it was not enough. Due to hunger, I could not avoid feeling sleepy during my studies. Later, with the help of an American friend of mine, I took a part-time job at a gas station owned by one of his relatives. My responsibility there was dispensing fuel to vehicles.

​Afterward, I engaged in my studies throughout the night and fell into a very short sleep of about two hours. Even though this life was extremely exhausting, every time I flipped open a book or turned on my mobile phone screen, the NASA dream, the rocket dream, and the astronaut dream that appeared before me became the reason to wash away the fatigue of all these tiring days and to stay strong.

​And so, this is the winter season.

Now, it is time to leave America. I am now a graduate holding a postgraduate degree. Yet, I waited for two weeks even after my visa had expired. Then, that decisive day, as precious as a golden mark, arrived. It was deeply heartbreaking. The names of five students pursuing the same degree as me were included on that list, but my name was not among them.

​I had thought that if my name were somehow included on this roster, I would somehow find the money to obtain American citizenship. But it was too late; that opportunity was lost to me. Later, I heard that native citizens get higher priority for admission into NASA. However, amidst all this, Nicholas had been selected for NASA.

​That evening, a party was held at Nicholas’s house to mark both the joy of his selection for NASA and my departure from America. As I was leaving, Smith hugged me, crying. He asked me to come back and visit him again. With an empty heart, I returned back to Sri Lanka.

​With a multitude of hopes, we had already mortgaged our family’s land, home, and the livestock on our farm. Yet, even when those hopes were shattered, my mother did not utter a single word of blame to me.

​After spending days locked away in my room, I arrived at a new realization: “Nothing that is truly meant for us will ever pass us by.” This was probably not my final destination. Stepping out of my room, I wiped away my tears, took the stipend money I had saved while living at Nicholas’s house, and went to see David, the wealthiest man in the village.

​I was still a small amount short of settling his debt. On the promise that I would pay the remaining balance later, I retrieved the legal documents for our house and land and returned home. I thought to myself: although the American stipend was such a small sum over there, how significant a fortune was it for us, a poor family in Sri Lanka?

My mother came home from her work at the farm to take lunch with her. As soon as she arrived, I handed her the legal documents for our house and land, asked her to stay home, and left for the garage where I used to work a long time ago.

​Once there, I asked for a job. Uncle Ranjith agreed to let me work in his garage, saying, “There are no jobs here for educated folks, and even if there were, I don’t have enough money to pay educated people.” However, finding another job on such short notice was impossible. Asking him to pay whatever amount he could manage, I worked at his garage.

​Many villagers began telling Uncle Ranjith, “Ranjith, you’ve really come up in the world, haven’t you? Doesn’t matter that you aren’t educated now you have graduates doing your labor!” As this went on for days, I found these insults unbearable to endure.

​I left that place at my mother’s request as well. She could not bear to see anyone insulting me. She had witnessed the efforts I made to gain so much education, the sleepless nights, and how I came this far skipping meals. Yet, none of those who hurled insults saw any of it.

​During these days, I frequently came to the place where I used to go searching for Ravana when I was a little child, just to find some peace of mind. Struggling with books and dreams in an endless battle, I felt thoroughly exhausted now. Back then, I had come here in search of Ravana because I felt a burning desire to build a Dandumonara (flying chariot). I did not find Ravana here, but this very place was the birthplace of my NASA dream. And here is how that happened:

​My mother and I used to stay alone at home very often when I was small. The reason we stayed home like this was that my father worked at a vehicle repair shop in the capital city. Daily, my mother engaged in managing the farm animals and cultivation work around our garden. She is the only person in this world who knows me best. Once, I told her that one day I would fly above these mountains. She simply smiled at me.

​It is true that since my childhood, I had a great obsession with traveling through the sky. So great was that obsession that not a single helicopter or jet flying above our house could ever escape my eyes. Whenever I spotted an aircraft like that, I would gaze at it until it disappeared from sight. While I was gripped by this airplane craze in my childhood, my mother would lift me high up with her own two hands and swirl me around a few times, saying, “Look, my little boy is riding an airplane to touch the stars!”

​The very first airplane I ever traveled on was my mother’s two hands.

As you know, little children have countelss stories during their childhood. It is true that they never hesitate to repeat whatever they hear. However, even you might be surprised by what I am about to say. I believed that I was Ravana. I do not know the exact day I started thinking this way, nor the day I first heard it. Ever since I was little, I kept saying that I was Ravana. I even told my friends never to use my real name, Nimal Mihidev Senathilaka, but instead to address me only by the name Ravana. If anyone called me by my real name, I would respond with great anger or reluctance. Because of this request of mine, my mother used to call me “Little Ravana.”

​As I grew up, I came to realize that our village was deeply connected to the legends of King Ravana. Yet, I still do not know why I claimed to be Ravana back then. According to the legends I heard about King Ravana, ancient belief has it that our village was the location where his aircraft landed, as well as a territory under his rule. The people here spoke of him with immense pride. Uncle Mahathun from our village used to say, “If there was a first aircraft in this world, it belonged to our King Ravana. If not for that noble ruler, where would the world get airplanes from?” He shared what he knew about Ravana with me.

​In the Meemure forest, there are very rare Beraliya, tamarind, and medicinal plants. I have gone into the forest with my friends countless times to search for different kinds of fruits and rare plants found there. When we collected and sold them to the Muslim traders who visited our village, a small amount of money would enter our wallets. Back then, that was actually a huge sum of money to us. On one such day when we went to gather fruits, I noticed a certain suspicious, mysterious place. Although my cowardly friends and I passed by it that time, that strange anomaly sparked immense curiosity in my heart. At the time, I must have been around ten or twelve years old. Taking a flashlight, I went there all by myself, thinking that Ravana might be inside. My little heart firmly believed that Ravana was here, and not at Yahangala.

​I went there in the dead of night to find out from Ravana whether I was indeed him. But Ravana was not there. With my little hands, I searched for Ravana by moving rocks and stones as much as I could. The mission to find Ravana was so long that I searched for him everywhere around that place even as dawn broke the next morning. Yet, he was nowhere to be found.

​Meanwhile, realizing I was missing from home, my panicked mother had even made a phone call to my father. Subsequently, the entire village had joined together to search for me. Past noon, feeling extremely hungry, I followed the landmarks I had noted on my way and returned home. From afar, I saw my mother crying while a few people were trying to comfort her.

​The fault was mine. Since I had gone with the intention of completing the Ravana mission quickly and returning home, failing to inform anyone was my mistake. Seeing me approach from a distance, my mother ran into the yard weeping and embraced me tightly. She did not strike me even once; she did not even scold me. Instead of being angry with me, all she did was offer her gratitude to God.

According to the villagers of our home town as well as ancient literature, Ravana is not someone who has passed away. During the Rama-Ravana war, he was struck by an arrow and collapsed unconscious, after which he was hidden away somewhere. Many people claim that this was upon the rock plateau known as Yahangala. Numerous books mention that Ravana will rise again. Another belief holds that, having lost consciousness from the arrow strike, he lies inside a vessel of medicinal oils (Beheth Oruwa). Regardless, if Ravana is to awaken once more, someone must awaken him. That was how I thought in my childhood.

​During this time, a television was brought into our home, not because we were well-off, but because the owner of the place where my father worked had thrown it into the dustbin, claiming it was broken, and my father had asked them for it. Afterward, spending a small sum of money, my father repaired it to a working condition and brought it home. A large pole was planted behind our house, and a small antenna was mounted upon it. Next, the only umbrella our entire house possessed my mother’s floral umbrella was tied above that antenna to prevent it from getting wet in the rain. That was the day I felt for the very first time, “Aren’t we rich people after all?”

As far as I knew, there were no televisions in our village back then. Therefore, many villagers came to our house to watch TV. One day, a huge puzzle arose in my mind: how on earth did such huge people get inside this TV box? Waiting until my mother became busy with her garden work, I quietly took a screwdriver and began unscrewing the TV connections in order to rescue the people trapped inside. I thought that by doing so, my mother would be very happy.

​So organized a child was I that I kept every removed part in mind, intending to reassemble it after releasing everyone trapped inside the television box. Having removed all the connecting screws of the TV, I peered inside, but there was no one in there. Inside were only twisted wires and cables. Meanwhile, my mother had come in and was quietly watching me without my realizing it. Immediately stopping the operation to rescue the people trapped inside the television, I reassembled it. Afterward, I checked to see if it still worked. It did. I felt immense joy. During this period, my mother and father believed that I would become someone who repairs broken things.

​When asked about my school affairs, my situation was honestly quite tragic. I was not very clever at studies. Teachers constantly said, “His talk is in an airplane, but his work is on foot.” However, the new science teacher who arrived at the school was someone who thought beyond the traditional teacher’s role. His first lesson was, “Who will we become one day?” Although this lesson had no relevance to science, the teacher might have asked it to get to know us. There were various answers to this question in our class. Those dreaming of becoming teachers, drivers, joining the army and security forces, explorers and guides, and land owners were among the dreams held by the majority of our class. Yet, even though I was not clever at studies, my dream was still to build a rocket.

My science teacher, with the help of his university friends, created the opportunity for me to pursue my dream, saying that we ought to see the world they never saw. He brought me a stack of books, which were aimed at learning the English language. When I went to the teacher’s quarters where he was staying in the evenings, he taught me English free of charge. He told me that if I wanted to build rockets, I had to learn English. From that point on, I mastered my least favorite subject with great enthusiasm.

​Not stopping there, he then gave me a huge collection of books and magazines containing details about rockets and asked me to read them. Furthermore, when I went to his residence in the evenings, he would show me videos related to rockets on his laptop. Obtaining rough designs of large rockets through Google, we sketched them out in a way that we could understand.

​Afterward, handing over my saved money to my father, I had the materials needed to build a rough prototype of a rocket brought down. He mentioned that there was no place in Colombo he hadn’t visited to search for my raw materials. At first, I prepared to launch the roughly built rocket into orbit, but it did not work.

​When I later went to my science teacher, he explained to me that behind it lay a foundation of physics far too complex for a little child like me to grasp. Subsequently, we began building the necessary circuits for it. We even crafted a remote controller for our rocket. In those days, I thought Google was the gateway to the universe, because there was almost nothing that couldn’t be found on it.

​One day, my father, my science teacher, and I launched our rocket into the sky, and it reached up to the cloud line. Finally, it was successfully landed.

This rocket we built was submitted to numerous science exhibitions, and many who saw my talents were amazed, especially since I was only a sixteen-year-old child at the time. I won awards for science and innovation on several occasions, which earned me the opportunity to study at a school in the capital city with full facilities and a scholarship. However, every time I went back to the village, I would discuss with my science teacher how to improve the rocket and how to send it into space. Yet, despite continuous efforts, we were not successful.

​Meanwhile, a science exhibition was held at the capital city school where I was studying, and I submitted my rocket to that competition as well. Many people had come to watch this exhibition, and it was a special day for the school. On this day, I prepared to demonstrate the launch of my rocket. However, instead of going up into the air, the rocket began darting back and forth along the ground like a skyrocket separated from its stick, causing the gathered crowd to run frantically in all directions. The rocket no longer responded to the remote control.

​Then, a loud sound echoed, and the rocket came to a halt on the ground, spewing smoke. All the internal circuits had exploded. This created a huge commotion within the school, and I cried profusely that day because my rocket had been destroyed. Soon after, I was summoned to the principal’s office. I thought I would be expelled from the school. However, the principal explained that such accidents are natural during experiments, asking me to test my creations very carefully in the future, and reassured me that no one was harmed in the accident.

​Afterward, the broken rocket stayed under my bed in the school hostel until the day I left the school.

Having passed my Advanced Level examinations, I gained admission to university in the Physical Science stream. There, I acquired the theoretical foundation essential for my goals, even if it wasn’t strictly focused on rocketry. However, opportunities for practical learning were limited for undergraduates like us, mainly because our country lacked the necessary technological knowledge and resources.

​Later, having received a scholarship to pursue a postgraduate degree, I left for America. Everyone believed this to be my ultimate stroke of good fortune. Without a second thought, even my mother and father converted all our possessions into money to fund my trip to America. Although I did everything within my power during that period, as you already know, I faced an unfortunate defeat.

​While I was staying in America, my father passed away. Being in America, I learned of this only about a week later. However, knowing that if I left, I would not be able to return, I accepted this bitter reality and remained in America, deeply grieving.

Having fought all these battles, when I finally returned home, I felt my heart, mind, and home were half empty, knowing that I would no longer meet my father in this house. When I went to the village school, I could not find my beloved teacher who had raised me up either. Having spent my life chasing these dreams, I had no job. My close ones were no longer by my side. Truly, those sacrifices and oversights only became visible to me once I had chased dreams and failed. Because of this, I grew increasingly anxious and deeply disillusioned. I even felt like leaving everything behind to ordain as a monk.

​Hearing that recruitments were taking place at two universities during this period, I applied and attended the process. After succeeding, I joined the University of Kelaniya as a probationary lecturer. That was the very university where I had studied before—the university where I earned my first degree. Here, there are countless students who are exceptionally talented, facing intense competition, and possessing broad new horizons. However, what they have is merely subject-oriented knowledge rather than practical expertise. The reason for this is the scarcity of resources in our country. Yet, someone who gives up on their dreams just by constantly seeing external shortcomings in every problem is not truly talented. I say that true capability lies in doing one’s utmost with whatever is available, amidst any obstacle.

Going home for the university vacation, I discovered something under my father’s bed one day. It was my first rocket. Truly, it wasn’t just my rocket; it was our rocket. It had been built by me, my father, and our school science teacher. This rocket had been crafted more than ten or fifteen years ago. I drifted back toward that beautiful dream of the past.

​You might remember that ever since the accident at the capital city school where I studied, it had stayed under my bed in the hostel. Today, I was able to find it under my father’s bed. My father had been so deeply confident in my success. Now, I possess the knowledge. I also have a job. Removing all the burnt circuits and destroyed parts, I bought the necessary components and thought to myself that I would assemble it when I came back during the next vacation.

​Afterward, going to the place where I once believed Ravana dwelt, I sketched the rough blueprint of a rocket once again. I hold a dream to one day launch a rocket into space named after Ravana.

After the vacation ended, I returned to the university, and on quiet afternoons, I constantly set out among the streets and shops of the capital city to search for everything needed to rebuild my rocket. During these days, my heart overflowed with immense love and devotion for my father, as I realized just how difficult it was to find these components. How much hotter was the capital compared to the villages? I wondered how much suffering my father must have endured in this scorching heat just for my sake, to make my dreams come true. Yet, today he is not here with me for me to show him even the slightest gratitude.

​Escaping the busy university life, the vacation I had been eagerly waiting for had finally arrived. It was the New Year season. By this time, it was the early period after I had been confirmed in my position as a lecturer. Returning home, I resumed work on the rocket. Such was this obsession that it was a time when I did not step out of my room even to drink a sip of water. During these days, the only reason I came outside was to use the restroom. Bathing or brushing my teeth were not even on my schedule. Eventually, I could smell the stench coming from my own body, yet I endured even that.

​After two weeks, I rebuilt the rocket to a state far better than it had been before. By then, the New Year season had come to an end. Taking my rocket, I went down to the garden below, while my mother followed behind to check if there was something wrong with me. Loading the rocket onto a wheelbarrow, I brought it down to the lower garden, albeit with great difficulty.

​Afterward, switching on the cameras and circuits mounted on the rocket, I watched the trajectory of the rocket using a new app I had developed for it.

The rocket did not work at once. I sat right down on the ground, overwhelmed by the setback, wondering if this attempt had failed as well. But then, suddenly springing to life, my rocket began its journey toward space. Through the feed from my very own rocket, my mother and I watched space together. Although my mother did not express her happiness in words, her eyes bore testimony to her joy. However, no one else ever got the chance to witness this moment, as my rocket collided with a meteorite in space and was destroyed. But that does not matter. I am now advanced. I am someone who has achieved success. Afterward, my vacation having come to an end, I returned to the university.

​It was my immense good fortune to have been able to spend that moment with my mother, whom I loved most in this world. Even if I say I accomplished this, I have no way to prove it. The only ones who know that I did it are my mother and I.

What I did next was to build another rocket together with university students, utilizing my own knowledge as well. I faced criticism not only among the lecturers; there were countless instances where I was criticized by certain students too. Even the lecturers disapproved of doing anything beyond one’s assigned duties, urging me to strictly confine myself to teaching the course units. They never favored anyone standing out more than they did.

​Yet, this is not what university life is about. University education should not remain limited solely to books and lectures. Joining hands with the few students who stood by me, we began constructing a rocket. There were only about ten students with me for the building of this rocket. Eight of them were male students, while two were female students.

One day, as I was building the rocket with my students, I received a phone call from an overseas number. It was from Winsmith. He informed me that Nicholas’s brother, our beloved Smith, had passed away from leukemia.

​Taking immediate action, I packed a few clothes at my boarding house that very day, applied for urgent leave, and called my mother to tell her that I was going to America before setting off. I do not know why I reacted this way. Though with difficulty, I managed to secure a ticket on a night flight. I sat waiting until the time arrived to board the plane.

​Once I boarded the aircraft, I felt that I didn’t really need to return to America after all. But now it was too late. I departed for America.

​Reaching America the following day, by the time I headed to Nicholas’s home, the funeral services had already ended. There was a portrait of Smith. In that picture, he was smiling, showing his teeth fitted with a brace-like plate. The moment I saw it, I felt as if he was looking at me and asking, “You came, even if it’s late, didn’t you?” Afterward, I went to Smith’s grave together with Nicholas. “May you shine like a star beside God, Smith,” I wished from the bottom of my heart.

​The present state of Nicholas’s home was completely empty. His parents were silent, keeping themselves busy with their chores likely to cope with their grief. Nicholas too, having left in the morning, would return very late. I felt as though Smith had taken the happiness of the house along with him, leaving nothing behind.

​Hoping to escape this emptiness, I went to my old university. There, I met an old friend, Dobby Francis. Dobby urged me to return to America, mentioning that although it wasn’t at NASA, he could get me a job at the rocket factory where he was working. I asked him once more if that was true, and he confirmed that it was. I further inquired what I would have to do there. He said, “You can initially work with us as a scientist, and with that support, you can later move to NASA.” He further added, “Is there any point in holding on to a dream you’re losing passion for, without fighting for it?” Hearing that, I too admitted that it was true. After all, my present life as a university lecturer had already become thoroughly dreary to me.

For years, I had endured the mismatched dialogues constantly thrown at my ears, the neglect, the ridicules, and the scoldings. University life was not the life I had hoped for; nor was it as beautiful as I had imagined. Subsequently, I told Dobby to hold that job for me for a month. Returning to Sri Lanka, I resigned from the university. Then, I went to see my mother and told her everything that had happened. My mother mentioned that she understood none of it and told me to do whatever felt right to me. However, in the end, she asked,

​“Son, are you going back to America?”

​When I replied, “Yes, Mother,” her eyes filled with tears, knowing that she would be left alone here once again not for a week, a month, or a day, but for years. I comforted her by saying that once I went back and reached a stable position in America, I would bring her over as well.

​Afterward, spending what was left of my savings on an airline ticket, I departed for America once more. Checking into a cheap restaurant-motel, I called Dobby, but Dobby did not answer my phone call. Then, becoming a burden once again, I went to Nicholas. I realized that Nicholas was not particularly happy about my return; he simply mentioned that he was busy.

​Following that, I set out in search of Dobby. It took me more than a month to find him, as there was no one here to offer me any assistance.

When I finally found Dobby, I asked him to help me get the job since I had returned. He replied, “How long has it been since that one-month period ended? The company hired a new employee in your place.” I pleaded with him kindly once more, “I’ve been here for over a month. How many times did I call you? You didn’t tell me any of this until I came looking for you. I even gave up my job to come here. Can’t you please check just one more time if there’s a suitable job for me there?” I begged him.

​He then mentioned that, given the current situation, only a cleaner’s position was available. Having no other choice, I decided to take the job, setting aside even my educational qualifications.

​From morning till evening, I worked eight hours a day as a cleaner there. Even Dobby avoided facing me during this time. Thus, days, weeks, and months passed. I remained merely an employee there, with no progress whatsoever. The money I earned was barely enough for my basic sustenance and lodging.

​One day, after finishing work in the evening, I walked into a bookstore out of fear that if I stayed like this any longer, I would end up being a cleaner forever. Having arrived there to buy a book, I accidentally met a female student from Harvard University. The moment I saw her, I realized she was having trouble selecting books. I helped her choose the books, and as we were leaving, she inquired about my details. I told her that I too had been a student in her academic department at her university. She then asked, “Are you a scientist at NASA now?” When I told her about my present situation, she felt sorry for me. She promised to look for another job for me, and I took her phone number as well.

​A few weeks later, when I called her, she told me that there was a job available as an assistant to a scientist she knew in his laboratory. Since the salary was higher than that of a cleaner, I agreed. On the day I went to the laboratory, she accompanied me, and I secured the job. During these days, she and I met frequently in the evenings. I taught her academic subjects, and we shared our past experiences and stories with each other. As this relationship deepened, a romantic bond grew between us. She was Lucy Lumen.

​However, in this romance, she received nothing material from me. To put it briefly, she willingly paid even for my food expenses, telling me to save money to build the rocket. But feeling that it was now time to bring my mother to stay with me rather than building rockets, I brought my mother over as well. When my mother came here, she had entrusted our house and lands to her brother to look after. I rented a small house for my mother and me to live in.

One evening, she asked me once again about the money I had saved. However, I had not saved much. Lucy took me to a shopping street and bought me a set of new clothes. Afterward, she asked me to come to her home to meet her parents. She even provided me with the cake and flowers to take for the meeting with her parent. Truly, she was a blessing that came into my life.

​Her mother had passed away, and only her father lived with her. Her father’s source of income was renting out houses and commercial spaces. He showed neither opposition nor any particular affection toward me during our first meeting, perhaps because I was not a native.

With the passage of time, he agreed one day to give me one of his rental houses free of charge for my experiments. Although we were not yet married, Lucy became pregnant. She was unwilling to terminate her pregnancy. Later, we got married. Following that, my mother and I moved in to live with Lucy and her father. I always tried to ensure that my mother and I did not become a burden to Lucy’s father. Since my mother did not know English, conflicts between Lucy and her were minimal. Lucy’s father never engaged in conversation with us.

​As soon as I returned after finishing work at the laboratory, I would set off for the rental house provided for my experiments. Meanwhile, Lucy gave birth to our child. It was a daughter. The moment the child arrived into this world, Lucy requested a divorce from me, stating that I had disrupted her education because of me, and that I showed no care toward her or the child. Yet, I had come there to tell her that I had successfully built a rocket. But this was not the moment for it.

She wept bitterly, and the baby began to cry no less than her. Wrapping my arms around both of them, I started crying as well. Afterward, once the crying had subsided, I shared the good news with her, and she embraced me, weeping once again. Although we were not able to launch that first rocket into the sky, we sold it for a substantial sum to a wealthy American school student.

​Deciding no longer to be a burden to her father, we purchased a new home and a vehicle for ourselves. During these days, I received another invitation this time from Dobby’s rocket factory. It is true that building a rocket alone takes an immense amount of time for me. Therefore, I joined them as a scientist. Although it was a high-paying job, it came with extreme monotony and intense pressure.

There is a saying in Sinhala: “A nation that does not think anew will never rise in the world.” As long as new things are not sought after, not just a nation, but the whole of humanity will see no progress. Therefore, I resigned from that job. Using the money I had saved, I established a new workshop. Though not on a massive scale, we built and tested small-scale rockets. We named our space exploration manufacturing institution “Hela Ravana.” Even if limited, these craft were produced for those in the future generations who dream of becoming space explorers to observe space. Those who experienced the wonder of my creations have won the opportunities that I was once denied, and they have shared that with me. Many have achieved the NASA dream that I could never make a reality.

​Thus, the days I suffered from hunger, the days crushed by debt, the unemployment, and all the defeats I suffered I have now turned them into my fortune and risen above. My father used to say, “Iron is sharpened only as much as it is hammered.” Instead of going to NASA, there is now a competitive rush among the students of my very own university to join our institution.

The best part is that Dobby’s son now works as a scientist’s assistant in our company. To prove to the world that you are right, or as a lesson for the insults, ridicules, and injustices done to you, revenge is not the path. One must take every setback as a blessing and rise above. Above all the courts in the world lies Nature. In time, Nature delivers answers and even retribution for everything. What one must do is to keep moving forward without altering the goal. There is a famous saying: “Aim for the moon; even if you miss, you’ll land among the stars.” Take light from this statement. That is what I constantly told and continue to tell my children.

​We gave our children a good education as well. They too are scholars at Harvard University itself. Many referred to our family as the “Ravana Family,” while others called us the “Prestigious Harvard Family,” because my wife, my two children, and I all of us were graduates of Harvard.

A separate section was built in our home to display the achievements, awards, and certificates earned by my children and me. I credit the ownership of all those awards and certificates to my wife. The reason is that, sacrificing all her own dreams, she constantly helped us pursue ours. Had it not been for her sacrifices, it would have been impossible to accomplish all this so successfully. She personally took care of and fulfilled every need regarding my mother, her father, and our children. Because of that, I felt as though a immense burden was lifted from my mind and heart. Although certain issues arose at the beginning, she eventually came to understand me. The institution of family became not a challenge or a trouble to me, but purely a source of strength. I feel that, too, was a great blessing.

Six or seven summers ago, my mother left this world. By that time, she had stayed with us for ninety-five years. No one can ever prevent the phenomenon called death. Last spring, I completed seventy years of age. This was the era when the space exploration journey I started with my little rocket had reached the level of massive rockets. By now, we have a competition with other companies in America and NASA itself. How many threats did our institution face? I wondered. I no longer desire to engage in space observation, to compete with space observation and innovation institutions, or to face threats and intimidations. We must realize that youth and vitality part from us with the passage of time.

However, if you accept aging purely on physical terms, it truly means that you have accepted defeat in your mind and heart. I say that health and physical strength alone—along with good fortune are not enough to undertake a journey. I say this because thoughts govern both the heart and the brain. Therefore, the control of thoughts and a well-maintained discipline are essential qualities for a big dreamer.

​This is the first time our company has prepared to launch a rocket for a moon mission. This space exploration journey took us a long period of nearly five years. During this time, I must say that not only myself, but even the office tea boy worked just as hard. In professional life, hierarchies exist solely because people in the world have classified them that way. Even in ordinary life, things are divided into what one can and cannot do. Someone might be skilled at building rockets, solving complex math, or framing arguments; yet he or she may not be capable of making a cup of tea for everyone present here. That is the true vision. For any place to develop or sustain itself, even the lowest-paid employee contributes immensely to the organization. I know this from my past experiences. Back when I worked as an employee at Dobby’s laboratory, if workers failed to report even for a single day, they had the power to paralyze the entire operation. I know that all too well. During my university years, I worked at a fuel station, and I realized how important even the lowest position the fuel dispenser is to keep the organization running, regardless of who the head of the company might be. What many fail to understand is the vital importance of the lowest links in an organization’s chain. Having worked as an employee at Dobby’s workplace, leaving to become a laboratory assistant, and later returning to work as a scientist in Dobby’s own institution, when I eventually started my own company, those employees came searching for me and joined my factory. There are no valueless people in this world. Everyone possesses their own worth and significance. All it takes is the humility to realize it.

First and foremost, human beings must understand humanity. Even if you reach the vast depths of the ocean of knowledge or surround yourself with immense wealth, all of it can vanish in an instant. In such a moment, to rise again and to endure, humanity alone will come to your aid. Therefore, at the end of it all, what truly matters is spreading humanity. No matter how far the world advances through science and technology, if humanity is lacking, what we truly need is the cultivation of moral virtues in human beings. This is essential not only for science and technology, but for the very existence of the world. Without humanity and unity, instead of us challenging science and technology, they could end up posing a challenge to us.

So, for this moon mission, for the very first time, only a robot and I were placed into orbit along with the satellite. It turned out to be a highly successful moon landing. This robot was created by a German scientist. Left alone in the spacecraft with this heartless robot, I was constantly struck by fear—wondering whether it would end my life or jeopardize this moon mission. Nevertheless, I set off on this journey abandoning my desire to survive, simply because it was my ultimate dream. I thought to myself, once dreams become reality, what does it matter what happens to life? Yet, despite thinking so, I remained fiercely determined to protect my life. I put my trust in my ground team on Earth. In short, I even had to place my faith in Koko, the heartless, data-driven robot companion who accompanied me. In this manner, we successfully navigated the first Ravana spacecraft toward the moon. The moon’s gravity is so low that humans simply float upon it. Having collected a few lunar rock samples, we returned to Earth. Although there was ample space on the moon to plant an American flag or a Sri Lankan flag, we must protect even the moon itself; such items could eventually become space debris. Therefore, having accomplished the purpose of the journey, I returned home.

How joyous it is when a dream cherished since childhood finally comes true! Even though I am past fifty years of age, I naturally danced alone on that day. I have never experienced such happiness in my entire life.

​Afterward, the spacecraft successfully splashed down in the Pacific Ocean, and I arrived unharmed. However, Koko did not return with me. I later learned that not all the parts that fell into the ocean could be recovered. Paying the price for ocean pollution is not the issue, but I am deeply concerned because ocean degradation can become a future threat affecting all living beings on Earth. My plea to future space explorers is to properly dispose of everything used in space exploration, to refrain from dumping non-biodegradable metallic parts into the oceans, and to avoid releasing debris into outer space. A space explorer must love space just as much as they love their exploration. This is because, although the space race is a competition among a few organizations and countries, the consequences of this race will have to be borne by the entire world.

I asserted this firmly to my daughter, my son, and the entire staff when it was reported that the exploratory vessel sent to Mars had been destroyed there. Curiosity is perfectly natural, but space exploration is no child’s play, nor is it something to be carried out recklessly. My anger was such that I even threatened to shut down the institution that day. How detrimental is it to our world when people conduct research blindly, without considering the far-reaching consequences or the gravity of their actions? It poses a threat not only to us, but to the entire solar system. On that day, I strongly emphasized that acting arbitrarily without thought and conducting reckless experiments is the mark of a fool, regardless of whether one is a scientist or anyone else. Due to the unrest and emotional distress I felt during those days, I did not attend the office for two days.

​I even felt like stopping the exploration of Mars and Venus. Going upward is not a problem, nor is human advancement. However, attention must be paid to the impact that human actions, carried out for the sake of development, have on humanity and the entire world. According to current information, it was publicly disclosed that NASA is also engaged in Mars exploration activities. Various media outlets have announced that the purpose of this exploration is to test whether an environment capable of supporting human life exists on Mars in the future.

However, just because someone else rushes, we should not act in haste. What should exist among us is not a race to outdo and surpass others, nor the making of hasty decisions. If something brings good to the entire world, we should focus on it and wish for its success, rather than creating rivalries between organizations and working merely for the sake of competition. Although healthy competition can be good, we must ensure that the work undertaken is executed properly. Our interactions with the universe must be handled with utmost precision and care, rather than acting arbitrarily as if we own it. I do not know whether I paced back and forth in my house out of overwhelming anger or anxiety. By now, it has been made public that the Mars spacecraft launched by our organization was destroyed. I had instructed that all of this be kept confidential within the organization, but it has already become a news story spread across the world.

It is true that we built a rocket to send to Mars, but how could a mere test model be launched into space? Since I was not present at the organization on that day, my son was acting as the head in my place. It is true that I had been busy with my mother’s affairs over the past few days, but hearing about this incident left me deeply shaken. Somehow, the news has leaked outside the organization. I even saw on television the journalists who were pursuing my son over the matter. However, it is true that people forget everything with time; as new information emerges, that is what happens. In about a week, it seemed as if everyone had forgotten what took place. The reason for this was NASA’s Mars exploration. It was a very hopeful mission. Since many people were holding onto hope that a savior-like safe environment such as Mars might exist for a time when living on Earth becomes impossible, this oversight was buried—yet a sense of guilt remains in my heart.

My son came to me and apologized, explaining that this situation had arisen due to an oversight during the trial. I had never spoken to him with such anger in my entire life. I told him:

​‘If you cannot carry out a job responsibly, stay at home.’

​However, upon the earnest appeals of my wife, my daughter, and the organization’s employees, he was not dismissed.

​Nevertheless, a pledge was obtained from both my daughter and my son that they would never again make such careless and hasty decisions.

​I came here all on my own. I even had to become an employee at a rocket company. At the very least, I was not even given an opportunity until I proved my capabilities. My children do not know how many hardships I faced after leaving the university. Therefore, I told them about their father’s life prior to the founding of our organization and how I created a clear path for them after they graduated from university. As they listened to these past stories, despite being young adults, I saw them trying to hide their tears in deep emotion. If they have understood me, that itself is a relief.

Later, I thought everything was resolved well. Upon returning to the organization the next day, the staff seemed to be working with far greater enthusiasm. On this day, I assigned a special task to my team. I instructed them to visit underprivileged, remote schools in various countries to share knowledge, allowing access to the organization’s equipment, and to pay special attention to children who show an inclination toward exploring celestial bodies. I also told them to prepare an application form on our corporate website so that details of such children could be submitted. As they looked at me in surprise, I asked, ‘Do you want your knowledge to be buried with your death, or do you wish to share it?’ Many expressed their willingness because they desired to further develop their experiences and to teach others what they knew. Most often, neither scientists in organizations nor university lecturers interact with ordinary people. They remain confined within the frames they have created for themselves and ultimately pass away.

Thus, as of present, we have become busy sharing space knowledge with the world. I, too, participated in such camps on certain occasions. In particular, carrying advanced astronomical observation equipment, we visited the schools that had applied. The most touching thing that caught my eye was seeing some children rejoin the queues again and again to observe celestial bodies with immense impatience, as well as seeing tears of joy in the eyes of others. Those children have so many questions. As they eagerly asked questions and learned, I found myself transported back to my own childhood. Although we could not answer them directly due to language barriers, we answered their questions as best as we could with the help of an interpreter. By now, the workforce of our organization has been further expanded. Namely, there is now one section dedicated to the routine work of the organization and another dedicated to sharing knowledge with the world. Having freed myself from corporate duties, I too joined these knowledge-sharing journeys. We named this program ‘Vision of Ravana.’ This was a time when, stepping back slightly from space exploration, I shared knowledge while taking in the beauty of the Earth.

These days are the most relaxed and happiest I have had in all these busy twenty-something years. How many children in the world dream about outer space and the stars! Yet, in the face of hardships and crises, only a very handful like a few fish caught in a net cast into the sea realize their dreams.

However, I am happy thinking that at the very least, they will come to know that there are other planets beyond this world. My son and daughter got married and to two scientists, no less. Both of their weddings took place on the same day, and even the banquet hall was decorated like a starry night sky. It was a truly joyful day. I wish them strength and the ability to make good decisions regarding their lives, gain more experiences, and reach maturity. I wonder if the generations following my wife and me in our family will now be filled with scientists. I rejoice in silence.

Gradually, with these marriages, our family grew larger. During the day, my wife spends her time with our grandsons and granddaughters. Whenever I have a break, I join them as well. Just like our own children, they aren’t the type to love toy pandas or teddy bears; instead, they adore spacecraft, dinosaurs, and stars. Even when they draw pictures, they sketch rockets, starry skies, the moon, and planets like Saturn. My wife constantly says that they are truly their grandfather’s children, and that is indeed true. ‘It seems my wife has deeply studied the sketches and drawings I made in my university notebooks,’ I joke. Hearing this, the children ask about their grandmother’s drawings. Then I tell them, ‘Your grandmother is a woman skilled at drawing skeletons and aliens.’ After that, everyone bursts into laughter. These are the memories with my grandchildren. It is more than enough for me if they grow up to be loving children.

Currently, our company is developing a spacecraft to be sent to Venus. The operations here are led by my daughter and son. Their names are Venus and Mars. With my wife’s consent, I named them after two of my ultimate goals.

​Now it is the evening of my life. Although I intended to depart for Sri Lanka with my wife, she did not come with me. This was because she was busy with the children’s affairs and was concerned about the well-being of our grandchildren. Saying that she would come to Sri Lanka later, I departed for Sri Lanka alone. I returned carrying the urn containing the ashes of my mother’s remains. Upon my arrival, our house had been swallowed by the overgrown wilderness. It was after exactly thirty or forty years that I reached here. I entrusted the task of cleaning my house to a few people in the village. No matter how much money I possessed, I did not make any modern renovations or build with luxury, because despite lacking luxury, a sense of peace dwelt here. I think and feel just how much more comforting peace is compared to luxury.

Upon returning to Sri Lanka, I was presented with an award by my own university. I told the undergraduates that unless they achieve success by practically applying the theoretical knowledge they possess, they will never truly learn as long as theories remain mere theories. Furthermore, dry theories are tedious only so long as no attempt is made to put them into practical use; otherwise, theories cease to be a bitter or tiresome subject, and I emphasized the importance of directing their intellect toward that realization. I am well aware of the numerous hardships in Sri Lanka, having experienced them firsthand. However, Sri Lanka is now more developed than before. Word has it that even the designer of the camera system on the spacecraft used for NASA’s Mars mission is a Sri Lankan

​I offered my knowledge as well as the small rockets and equipment from our institution to several universities to be used for educational purposes. Furthermore, I distributed my own wealth to support the education of students in underprivileged schools. I have also told my children that although they live in America, they belong to the bloodline of the Hela race, descended from King Ravana. I still vividly remember how my children used to listen wide-eyed whenever I told them stories about Ravana when they were young. Subsequently, I instructed that a fund be established through our company to support underprivileged schools in Sri Lanka, and that projects be initiated to provide scholarships for children worldwide who show an inclination toward space education. Now, our little palace in Sri Lanka my childhood home is filled with recent awards and accolades.

Occasionally, villagers and local children come and go. I strove to teach them as much as I knew. I spent my evenings teaching them that the world we see is not as vast as we imagine, and that we must set precise goals to pursue our dreams. Many villagers gather here in the evening, chatting and sharing thoughts. I lay down my final note as follows: Upon my death, I request to be buried where my mother’s ashes rest, where I once searched for traces of Ravana, and where the very journey of my dreams first began.

Postscript

“This is a story that emerged from Meemure, one of the most beautiful hidden villages in Sri Lanka. I do not know if there is any village in this world as beautiful as mine. It is the most enchanting village I have ever seen. The most beautiful sky in this world belonged to the heavens right above my village of Meemure. How breathtaking is Meemure, with its mountain peaks wrapped in constant veils of mist, shifting their colors from time to time? I invite you, the reader of this story, to come and visit to see for yourself whether this is true or not. This is the twilight of my life. If it is possible, come visit, for I will be waiting here until you arrive.”

​Today, he has closed his eyes forever. He has departed on his final journey. I conveyed everything he told me to all his family members, and today, his children from America, his employees, his students, and his friends from all directions have gathered here. I wrote his story into a book exactly as he told it. But today, he is not here to receive it.