Ted
Y'know ever since I was young, and you could barely walk. I always imagined your wedding, the beautiful white dress, me next you in a three piece suit, as you read your vows to you husband to be. Alexa would be next to me weeping quietly and mum and dad in the front row both smiling proudly. The ballroom would be decorated in silver, white and black, with roses of all different colours lining the floor. Even the little flower girl dresses for Madeline. and the speech, my speech, about all the good times we had growing up, all the times we got in trouble or snuck out, those little moments you never truly forget. I have sketchbooks filled with drafts of speeches or the many designs of dresses that came to mind over the years, it sits tucked under my bed, in the furthest corner. A place no one would look. I was planning to show you, when you announced your engagement, I would pull you aside and show you, to help choose a dress. I always thought about that day, but never about today. The day I would see the ballroom adorned in silver and black, in a way it's like i imagined, the ballroom covered in black banners with silver embellishments, Alexa weeping beside me, mom in the front row. And I'm reading my speech, the one about all the good times. Only, there is no husband, no engagement, no intricate white dresses and Lillies instead of roses. Most importantly your not here, not at the alter, not in the room, not even in the box, you're box. Black stained wood, mahogany, you always liked the scent of mahogany, with silver handles and blue velvet insides. A bouquet of white Lillies sit on top, bits of rosemary sprinkled across it. It wasn't even a month after dad. I should've expected it, you never coped well with loss. Alexa believes your gone, really truly gone. I honestly wish I did too, but I know you to well. You really were determined though, flames tall enough to touch the clouds and hot enough to melt them and a strong scent of gasoline. You used a gallon and half, at least according to the police, ‘who ever did it, wanted you dead.' they don't know you though, that maybe ‘they’ just wanted the house gone, all the evidence with it. I would ask Alexa for her thoughts but she's hurt enough already. I don't want to make it worse.
I still go to that house or what's left of it. A few charred beams and maybe a door, if your lucky. I can still see it, the sunny yellow walls, and brown roof. The tree in the back and the picket fence in the front. A wonderful birthday present, wasn't it? A place of your own? Honestly, it's sad to see it like this. Burnt black and brown, no garden or little pond. No life.
Your grave is with the others, right next to dad's, where you would of wanted it. The grave stone marked ‘died too Young' Tyler's words not mine. Alexa's getting better, with the loss I mean, she's moving on, focusing on the twins. I'm trying to focus on mine but it's a struggle. Tammies picking up the slack, I owe her the world. She always tells me 'healing isn't linear' and while I know it's true I wish it wasn't.
I know your not dead. I know you faked it, burnt that house down, the house I bought for you, and left. I'm looking now, for any sign of you and Madeline, and when I find you, I'm going to force you to read this and look through the sketch books, every single one, and show you what you took with you and what you left behind, in that burning house. And then I will walk away, like you did, but I will go back to my family and my life and leave you behind.
Tammie thinks I'm getting better, I look after my kids, keep them safe and i actually clean now. I still suck at it, apart from the dishes, they were the only cleaning I knew how to do. One-day I woke up and decided enough was enough, I needed a day to focus on something else, the day turned into a week, the week turned to two, the two turned to four. I wasted enough time on you already. But now I'm here, blood on the clean floors, knuckles bruised and a black eye. It's my blood at least, like that's any better, dripping from my nose in big drops. I'm trying to avoid Freya, I know she would insist on patching me up, she's getting quite good at it now. I'm going to avoid her, at least until I can wrap my knuckles myself, I don't want her to see them, and I'll tell her I walked into a door. She doesn't need to know, it'll make her feel worse, I can't tell Tammie either, I'll have to cross that bridge eventually, but not today, when I look like this. At least Tyler is worse off, pretty sure I broke something, a finger or his hand, I'm not enirely sure. Was it dumb? Most definitely, I'm most likely going to get punished for this but he knows I don't fuck around now.
Freya started training, earlier then normal, she's still only seven. Tyler knows I'm pissed, I know you would be too. I broke his foot this time, purposely. I really don't care how he reacts. I know he won't hurt Freya, she's too valuable to him. I'm still going to kick his ass, again and again until he admits he's sick.
The property is still vacant, some believe it's because it's cursed, others say no one wants it, in truth I just haven't gotten around to selling it yet. I will someday, just not yet. I wonder, of all the things you could of done, why burn it? You could of left and never come back, you would be far gone before anyone noticed, so why draw the attention to yourself?
Freyas ten now, and by all the luck she got paired with Tyler's daughter. He did this on purpose I swear. August is six, and mavis is a long story, I guess I never said it out loud but she left, like you did. She was only ten. Fuck it all at this point, maybe you did the right thing getting Madeline away when she was still young. I know why Alexa stayed but me? Thats a mystery.
You've been on my mind alot lately or why we didn't keep our promise. You did I suppose, Alexa needed to be under the protection of the mciver clan. But me? I didn't need anything from them. Was it just to late for me? Now I'm stuck with it. No matter what.
Madeline should be starting school now shouldn't she? I wonder where your sending her. Akingstons? It would make sense, you are a legacy, but Kyron knows you, it's Risky. But we both know Madeline is dangerous without training, Proper training. I hope you know what your doing, for her sake.
10 years,
You've been gone 10 years. But by some miracle, guess who shows up on my doorstep, metaphorically, Well kinda. Either way, your bound to show up now. I'm not letting her out of my sight either, I know you can be a sneaky bitch.
.....well fuck.
