BEFORE I KNEW

I never thought moving could feel this much like losing something.

Maybe that sounded dramatic, but I couldn't help it.

I was leaving everything I knew behind. My school, my routines, my friends, the places I was used to, and basically the only life I'd ever known.

And for what?

A new city. A new house. A new school.

A completely new life.

My parents kept calling it a fresh start.

I called it extremely inconvenient

Especially because they had decided to do this right before senior year.

I still couldn't believe it.

If there was one thing I wished I could change about the whole situation, it was the timing. I'd spent years getting comfortable at school, knowing exactly where I needed to be, who I'd see every morning, and which teachers were most likely to notice when I hadn't finished my homework.

Now I was supposed to start all over again.

I could still remember the last afternoon I'd spent with Lily and Ivy.

We'd been sitting outside our old school, trying to act like it was just another afternoon. It wasn't working.

Lily was the first to speak.

“Why do you have to leave?”

She looked genuinely upset, and somehow that made everything worse.

I looked down at my hands.

“My mom just opened a boutique and dad has some business here,” I said with a small sigh. “I wish I could stay, but they've already bought a house and made all these plans.”

Ivy shook her head.

“So you're really leaving us?”

“I don't have much of a choice.”

Lily looked away for a moment.

“We'll really miss you, Ellie.”

I smiled, even though my eyes were starting to water.

“Miss you two.”

“Text us as soon as you reach,” Ivy said.

“I will.”

“And don't forget us.”

I laughed softly.

“How could I?”

We hugged before I left, and I promised them we'd keep talking.

I really hoped we would.

Now, sitting in the car on the way to my new school, I tried not to think too much about what came next.

It wasn't working.

The city outside the window was unfamiliar, full of roads I didn't recognize and buildings I'd never paid attention to before.

Our new house was nice. More than nice, actually.

But apparently, having a bigger bedroom didn't automatically make leaving your entire life behind feel better.

Then my thoughts drifted to Ryan.

Two years.

I had a crush on him for two whole years, and what did I do about it?

Absolutely nothing.

Not because I didn't want to tell him.

I did.

I had imagined it so many times that I'd practically written the conversation in my head.

Maybe I'd tell him after class.

Maybe over text.

Maybe when we were alone.

But every time I got close to actually saying something, my brain came up with a hundred reasons not to.

What if he didn't feel the same?

What if things became awkward?

What if I ruined our friendship?

So, naturally, I did what any completely reasonable person would do.

I kept my mouth shut.

And now I was leaving without ever telling him.

Fantastic.

“Are you planning to spend the entire drive staring out the window?”

I turned around.

Avery was watching me from the back seat, looking far too excited for someone who is leaving all her friends.

“Maybe.”

“Not that face again, Ellie.”

“What face.”

“The my life is over face.”

I gave her a look.

"My life isn't over"

"Then breathe and stop worrying too much"

I smiled.

That was Avery. Annoying when she wanted to be, but somehow always good at getting me out of my head.

Then Dad spoke from the front.

“We're almost there.”

My smile disappeared.

I sat up a little straighter.

My stomach tightened.

Westbridge High, my new school.

Westbridge had a reputation for giving its students more than the usual classes and exams. Seniors were given opportunities to explore different career paths, gain experience and build achievements that could help them after graduation.

That was one of the reasons my parents had been so excited about the move.

I was still deciding how I felt about it.

My thoughts immediately started spiraling.

What if nobody liked me?

What if I got lost?

What if I walked into the wrong classroom?

What if everyone already had their own friend groups?

What if I couldn't find my place here?

And then there was my biggest worry.

What if I couldn't get any closer to the future I wanted?

I'd always loved fashion. Not just wearing pretty clothes, but creating them. Sketching designs, imagining how different pieces could come together.

I want to become a fashion designer.

And eventually, I want to model my own work too.

It sounds ambitious.

Maybe even a little crazy.

But it is what I want.

If Westbridge really gave seniors the opportunities everyone talked about, maybe this year could help me get there.

Assuming I survived it first.

The car turned through the gates.

And there it was.

Westbridge High.

I stared through the window.

The main building was bigger than I'd expected, with pale stone walls, tall glass windows and wide steps leading to the entrance. Banners welcoming the new school year hung near the doors, and the lawns looked so perfectly trimmed that I immediately felt bad for every patch of grass I'd ever stepped on.

Students filled the courtyard.

They were laughing, talking, rushing toward the building and, somehow, looking completely comfortable.

A girl walked past in wide-leg trousers, a fitted top and a blazer thrown casually over her shoulders. Another had paired sneakers with a dress and somehow made it look effortless.

Okay.

I was going to like the fashion here.

Maybe.

Everyone seemed to know exactly where they were going.

Meanwhile, I was sitting in a car trying to remember how to breathe.

“This is it,” Mum said softly.

The car came to a stop.

I reached for my bag.

Mum turned around and smiled at me.

“You'll be okay, Ellie.”

I nodded.

“I know.”

A part of me wasn't convinced.

Dad gave me an encouraging smile as I opened the door.

I stepped out and adjusted my bag on my shoulder.

Westbridge looked even bigger from the ground.

Students walked past me without giving me more than a quick glance. Somewhere near the entrance, a group of girls were laughing over something on one of their phones. A boy hurried up the steps with one shoe untied, apparently unaware that he was seconds away from embarrassing himself.

I almost smiled.

Maybe this place wouldn't be intimidating as I'd imagined.

I turned toward the entrance.

The doors stood wide open, with students disappearing through them one after another.

I tightened my grip on my bag.

New school.

Senior year.

New people.

A future I wasn't completely sure I was ready for.

There was no turning back now.

I took a deep breath.

Okay.

Here goes nothing.