The Vow: To Get Her

Hi, I’m Claire.

The Vow: To Get Her began during lockdown, at a time when life became much quieter on the outside and much louder on the inside.

I was watching someone I loved struggle through choices and consequences that I could not fix for them. I learned what it feels like to stand beside someone while knowing you cannot carry their pain, undo their mistakes, or protect everyone from the impact of them.

There is a particular kind of grief in loving someone who is hurting — because you can hold compassion for the person they are trying to become while still mourning the damage left behind.

I learned that standing beside someone does not always mean standing in front of the consequences for them.

This story grew from those difficult questions.

What does loyalty cost when the person you love is also the source of your hurt?How do you forgive without pretending nothing happened?How do you keep loving someone without losing yourself in the process?

Leila’s story is fictional. Her circumstances are not mine. But the emotions behind her journey are deeply personal.

The fear of watching someone fall.The helplessness of knowing you cannot save them.The anger that can exist alongside love.The hope that people can change, while accepting that change cannot erase what happened.

I wrote this book as a place to put those feelings — the complicated ones that do not fit neatly into forgiveness or blame.

At its heart,The Vow: To Get Heris a story about survival, loyalty, love, and what remains when everything you thought you understood begins to fracture.

Thank you for taking the time to read Leila’s story.

If you choose to share your thoughts, theories, favourite moments, or even question the decisions these characters make, I would genuinely love to hear them. Stories are shaped by the conversations they create, and I am grateful to anyone willing to step into this one.

I suppose every writer eventually reaches that point — where the story leaves their hands and becomes something the reader gets to hold.

So, as Leila would say: “But I know HaShem and sheer mazel have their limits.” After everything this story has carried to get here, I suppose all I can do now is hope these pages find the people who need them — and that somewhere within them, you find something that stays with you.

EXTRACTS:

A few words from the people who live between these pages...

Trauma lies about beginnings. It points to the loudest moments—the sirens, the gunshots, the blood—and says,There. That is where everything changed.But danger does not always announce itself red-faced and furious, throwing threats at your front door. The truth waits more quietly. It speaks softly and pays in cash. It keeps its hands clean and lets desperate men make themselves useful.— Leila Miller

“Jamie counted everything: exits, threats, breaths, and the distance between what he wanted and what he allowed himself to have.“— Leila Miller

“There was no tenderness in his gaze, no fear of breaking me. Instead, he looked at me as if I were the singular force capable of dismantling the restraint he had spent years perfecting. And against everything I knew, everything I had spent years preserving, I wanted him to stop standing guard over the distance between us and admit that he had spent years holding a line he had never wanted to exist.“— Leila Miller

“The strongest version of you isn’t the uniform. It’s what the uniform costs.” — Leila Miller

“He didn’t look like a man taking what he wanted. He looked like a man trying to memorise the exact second we stopped pretending this could ever be undone.“— Leila Miller

“I know what you are... You are loyal, stubborn, and reckless when you ought to be cautious. Clever, until someone you love is threatened. That is when you start bleeding out pieces of yourself as if they cost you nothing.“— Jamie Anderson

“Tell me to stop. Give me the lie we both need to walk out that door. “— Jamie Anderson

“You can’t tactical-brief your way out of grief, Anderson.“— Christopher Miller

“I cannot survive mourning someone who is still alive. Not while you stand there pretending you are still my father.” —Jennifer McKay

“Your wounds healed into armour. Mine are rotting from the inside out.“—Jennifer McKay

And there you have it — the people I created, burdened with emotional baggage, questionable coping mechanisms, and then asked you to become attached to.

You’re welcome.

I’m sorry in advance.

CONTENT WARNING:

This story contains mature themes, strong language, and potentially graphic content. Please read at your own discretion.

COPYRIGHT NOTICE:

This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, businesses, organisations, places, events, and incidents are either products of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, or to actual events is purely coincidental.

ALL RIGHTS RESERVED:

The Vow To Get Her, including all chapters, prologues, epilogues, and associated content, is protected under the Copyright, Designs and Patents Act 1988.

All rights are reserved by the creator and copyright owner, The Vow To Get Her; No part of this work may be copied, reproduced, distributed, transmitted, adapted, published, broadcast, sold, or otherwise used without the prior written permission of the copyright owner. Unauthorised use, reproduction, or distribution of this work may constitute copyright infringement and may be subject to legal action under applicable copyright laws.