The Barren Wolf

"Happy birthday."

I woke to my clothes being thrown in my face. I groaned, sitting up slowly to take in my decrepit surroundings. Ah, now I remember why I was here. It had been a bad night. Another unsuccessful heat. And now I was past my prime.

Today was probably going to be my reckoning.

"Alpha wants to see you." I squinted with my good eye, the other still swollen shut, and could just make out the silhouette of Brett buckling his belt.

A long time ago, we were mates. He had been my sweetheart and the one who introduced me to the pack. I pledged my loyalty to the pack, and him, and ruined my life.

I got up gingerly, my body still sore and riddled with bruises, and put on what had become my uniform. A shapeless short-sleeved black dress that went down to my ankles.

I had a feeling what the Alpha would say today, but nothing could truly prepare me for this fate.

Brett held out his hand, and I was overwhelmed with a wave of nostalgia. I took his hand, remembering the good days when we were mates. Before I found out I was defective, and he decided to end our relationship. Except, the Alpha made him my keeper instead. He kept me alive, barely, in case my defect could be fixed.

When I was born, the humans were dying out. At first it was disease that came for them, then their crops began to fail and starvation set in. Some of them aligned with the supernatural communities, with hybrids becoming more and more common. But then the babies stopped coming. Then one day, the last human died and it was just us left.

Then the vampires started dying off. Their main food source was gone, and their experiments in turning other supernaturals were failing.

Now, it's our turn. Our pups are becoming rarer and rarer, with many of them barely surviving through childhood. It made our women precious, our children even more so. Except for me. Because I could not conceive a pup.

Brett made sure I remembered my place, roughly tugging me out of the shack that I was delegated. He practically dragged me to the meeting hall where Alpha James was waiting.

Brett was James' Beta. Because of that, 5 years ago when Brett could no longer handle my failures, Alpha James took mercy on me and kept me from becoming a rogue. In exchange, I was for the pack's use. At first, it was work in the kitchens. I was a decent cook, and pretty average at cleaning. But I was no longer mated, and soon a challenge was issued amongst the unmated males.

Who could get the barren wolf pregnant?

It turns out the answer was no one. My time was up.

Brett tossed me into the hall, where I landed practically at the Alpha's feet. I immediately tried to sit up, avoiding eye contact. We had once been friends, when I was Brett's mate, now I was just a problem he had to solve.

"Rowan, what are we going to do with you?" James' voice was smooth like silk, as he paced in front of me. I could make out the click of his fancy leather shoes and the well-tailored trousers. Alpha James' was always dressed like he was heading into the office.

Rowan, that was my name. It was so rare to hear it; even though it signalled my end, my chest still fluttered in joy to hear it. Rowan, I was still her.

I didn't answer, couldn't answer. I wasn't allowed to speak to him directly anymore. Not when I was such a weak burden on the pack. It had been months since I shifted, I wasn't even sure I could anymore. Once my wolf had been stronger than me, now she was just a whisper.

I could feel the Alpha taking in my appearance - the swollen eye, the bruised limbs, and my ankle looked more crooked than usual. "What were you up to last night?"

He didn't really want me to answer, so Brett did. "Tony had a little too much fun last night. Shifted while he was with her." They chuckled, like Tony's big paw stepping on my throat was a joke. Good thing I didn't need to speak because I was unsure I was capable anymore.

Alpha James continued. "We get one chance a year, just one, to bring a pup into this world and again and again, you've failed." Her yearly heat had just finished and he was right, there was no pup on the way.

"We can't keep doing this Rowan," I heard Brett chime in. I nodded, eyes still down.

The Alpha sighed. "Rowan, we talked about this five years ago. You've had so many chances. Time is up." I could feel my body tensing up, waiting for the inevitable.

"Rowan Fenn, you are no longer a member of Ashcroft pack. From this day forward, you are a rogue. We've warned surrounding packs about you and they will treat you accordingly. You have one hour to get off our land."

I knew it was coming. I still had hoped for the sweet release of death instead. I could hear the Alpha leave, and Brett give another one of his sighs.

"We had fun, didn't we Row?" I tried not to flinch, but failed. Brett's version of fun and mine were not the same. He lifted me up by the armpits and tried to get me to stand. I couldn't. Years of my bones breaking and healing without help have left them crooked and weak.

"Fine. We'll do this the hard way." He began to drag me to the territory line. The meeting hall sat in the centre of Ashcroft lands so it would be a long and painful dragging. I tried to get up, but he was too fast. I need to preserve some of my dress if I was going into the wilderness. I didn't even wear shoes most days so this dress was basically all I had.

He stopped in front of a campfire. It was an odd time of day for it to be going but I quickly understood why he'd brought me first. I whimpered as I saw the metal branding iron sitting in the flames. He didn't explain a thing, just left me on the ground and reached for the brand. He roughly grabbed my wrist where the Alpha's bite mark sat. He was going to burn it off, to take me away from the pack mind link. Not that I had been included in years.

It was an oval shape, and the moment it touched my flesh, it sizzled like a frying pan. I screamed, my voice hoarse, and felt like I would pass out from the pain. It was blinding, all I could see was white and all I could hear was my scream. He lifted the brand again, going towards my other wrist.

I understood. He would brand the other wrist to make sure I could never join another pack's link; there would be no space to bite. He had done the same when he had forsaken me as his mate. I had the exact two brands sitting above my collarbone.

As the second wrist sizzled, this time, I did pass out.

I woke up at the border line, with Brett scowling down at me. I was still on Ashcroft territory. "Time to go." He pointed ahead.

I just had to make it over the line. I tried to stand, my limbs trembled until I fell again. I would have to crawl. So I did. I dragged my tired and broken body across the invisible line, all my allegiance to Ashcroft burned off my body.

They wanted me gone? I wanted to be gone too.

I placed one hand over the threshold, then the next. I dragged my torso over, then my hips. I paused to catch my breath and crawled forward again, bringing my knees with me.

I didn't know what was beyond Ashcroft.

But I would rather die than let another one of them touch me ever again.

I dragged myself further with my toes finally crossing the threshold. I was in the wild lands, no wolf's land. I let exhaustion take me, curling up in full view of my former pack.

For the first time in twenty years, I was on my own.

But this time, I was alive.