Paranoia

The warm but comfortable wind.

The sound of cicadas.

The red sky.

The sound of my footsteps.

These common things, for some reason, seem so out of place today.

The sky is tinged with red color.

It’s as if it’s saying goodbye.

...

It’s so silent today.

...

In this deep silence, even my footsteps seem so loud.

They are so loud that they would crack open my skull.

I don’t understand why, but silence, especially today, is hurting and ...sad.

Maybe because it’s my last day here.

The familiar scene seems so unfamiliar. It’s like I’m trespassing into some world I didn’t know.

Every step I take keeps getting louder.

I don’t like it. It’s so jarring. There are no people here today. It’s as if I’m the only person existing in this world.

I sense a glare that is directed towards me, however, I can’t find the owner of the glare nearby. The first thing that comes to mind is that,

I’m alone.

So, isn’t this the time to commit a crime where there are no witnesses? The thought alone sends chills through my spine.

My heart beats so loud.

It’s so loud that it could jump out of my chest any second. Sensing that I’m in danger, I try to walk faster. My eyes dart around the surroundings. It feels like I’m about to be hunted down.

By whom? I don’t know.

By what? I don’t know.

I pick up my pace in my steps. The sky feels so red, it reminds me of blood.

Seeing my destination finally snaps me back to reality.

My steps finally come to a halt. Well, first things first, let’s finish buying what I need. I brought a list that contained the Items I need so that I wouldn’t forget.

Right at the entrance of the store I’m greeted by an old security guard. I finally enter the store and take an empty cart and fill it with the things I need. The prices in this store are fixed so there is no room for bargaining, though I couldn’t care less about bargaining.

I carefully maneuver my way towards the cashier. Seriously, why build these complex pathways rather than making it a simple thing like rows? We will never know.

I pay the bill and carefully put the tray back and I transfer the items into a carry bag.

By the time I start walking to my home, the sun starts to set, and it’s slowly getting darker. The street lights were switched on, which were of no use since they are so far apart.

It’s still not completely dark yet, but I could see the moon and a few stars, which are shining faintly, since the day isn’t over, the moon has yet to bloom to its fullest. I quickly make my way home, looking at the now bland sky, which will be filled with stars in a few hours.

I finally arrived at my home. It’s a large traditional type of house. It’s said that it was built in 1987, and it’s still going strong. I slide open the door and leave my shoes in the rack. Oh, there is a pair of shoes I don’t recognise. Of course, I know the person to whom these shoes belong.

“I’m Home.”

“Welcome back,” I was greeted by her who had just arrived here.

“Hi, Akane. It’s been a while.”

“Give those to me, I will pass them to your mother Kazuki.”

I do as I am told and neatly put my shoes in the shoe rack.

I enter the living room. where a warm smile from Akane greets me. It’s been a while since I saw her; she has become more beautiful than she was 10 years ago.

I guess 10 years is a long time.

She urges me to sit.

I sit across the opposite side of the table facing her.

“We have a lot of catching up to do, Kazuki.”

“Yeah. How is your life, Akane?”

“At first, I felt that it was very crowded. Unlike here, there is no space between the buildings, and there are so many people walking in the streets. It was a bit tiring at first, but as time kept passing, I got used to it.”

“But, coming here was very nostalgic Kazuki.”

“This village didn’t change a bit.”

“I could remember like it was yesterday, when we played together as kids.”

“Yeah, neither the village nor the people living here changed other than adding a few more years of life.”

“Did you participate in the village festival this year kazuki?”

“Ehhh. I still don’t like going into groups Akane, I’d rather play super smash sisters at home.”

“You haven’t changed a bit, Kazuki.”

Yeah, she is right, it’s like time here has frozen since forever. I could list the things that would happen every year. Every year is the same here without a change. It’s like a routine life. I wanted to break from it. That’s why I studied so hard to get into a good university. I guess I wanted an adventurous life.

“Akane. Do you enjoy life in the city?”

“Hmm. Yeah, after adjusting to city life, it’s quite enjoyable. I made some friends at my workplace, which made it nicer.”

“You have to get used to it huh.”

“Yeah. Are you feeling nervous about moving out?”

“A little,” I guess that’s why I was feeling lonely, and there are so many doubts about moving to a strange place. I thought I would be free from this ever-unchanging life in the village, so I desperately tried to get out of here. But it feels that something is wrong, things like would it be too much for me, would I be able to adjust to my life, am I throwing out all the nice things this place gave me? These thoughts plague my mind.

For reasons even I don’t know I wanted to scream.

“Kazuki.” She calls me out.

“Is that TV still working?”

“Yeah, surprisingly, it still works. I was like “This is the year that it would give out” 7 years ago and it’s stll here like a fungal infection.”

“Hahaha. Who compares a TV with a fungal infection?”

“I mean, if you think about it, they are both the same thing. None of them leaves you quickly.”

“You want to get rid of this old one and get a new TV, is what you were thinking, right?”

“You got me!” I’ve always wanted to have a new LED TV ever since I saw one when we visited Chiba.

“Well... Keeping my electric appliance obsessions aside, how much do you earn in your job, Akane?”

“Ohhh. Kazuki, are you curious?”

“W-well, I was just asking. No ulterior motives, I swear.”

“I was teasing you Kazuki.”

“Its closer to 5 hundred thousand yen.”

“I see.”

“By the way, Kazuki?”

“Do you remember our Bet?”

Oops, I feared she might remember. I was trying to keep her occupied, but my plan failed.

“Maybe?”

“W-what bet are we talking about?”

“The one with the loser has to obey the winner thing.” She makes a smug face that clearly says, I won.

Let me remember, it was 10 years ago I think

10 Years ago

I was crying.

The only person whom I’d call a friend is leaving this village.

She was with us as long as I can remember, even though her parents were right next door.

I was too young to understand that she was abandoned by her own mother and father.

I thought she would be with us forever.

But when her parents finally divorced and moved away from the village, her father’s relatives came and adopted her.

Since it’s her blood-related family, we had no choice but to let her go.

I remember that I cried so bad.

It was ten years ago.

Probably because I cried so much, she made a bet with me.

If the plant she planted in the backyard still exists, then she would win.

Even if I would lose it was the memento she left, so I carefully raised that plant into a tree.

Well, I had no choice but to take care of it.

Present Day.

Hence, I’ve lost the bet.

“Oh well....”

“You got me.” I throw my hands up and admit my defeat.

“So. Let’s hear it. What do you want Akane?”

For some reason, she fidgets around, and as a result, we have an awkward pause.

She breaths in and out, and it looks like she made up her mind.

“Kazuki?”

“Yes?”

“You haven’t found a place to stay in yet, right?”

“Yeah. But the agency has some rooms available, which we are going to visit.”

“If that’s the case then, would you.....”

“Um...Stay with m-”

“I mean in the apartment that I’m currently in?”

“They have an empty room next to mine. its near your university and I can help you.”

“Sigh” she sighs and shrugs her shoulders.

She looks a little disappointed.

I don’t understand what’s going on in her head. Oh well, as they say, there is nothing more mysterious than a woman’s heart.

“I’ll ask my father if that would be possible.”

“I don’t know for sure if he’ll accept it, though.”

My mother, who was listening to us starts to speak up.

“Idiot, Kazuki. If someone is trying to help you, you should accept it.”

“I’ll convince your dad.”

“O-okay.”

Seeing my mother, who is giving me disappointed looks. I don’t understand what I did wrong.

“Do your best, Akane-chan.” She gives a thumbs up to Akane, and she does the same.

My father and brother return from work.

Akane talks to them briefly, and they go to freshen themselves up.

The mood, which seemed so quiet until today, seems a little brighter.

We all finish our dinner, and my dad and brother briefly exchange words with my mother. Seems that she already convinced them.

Everyone disperses. Akane goes to the kitchen to help out with the dishes.

I get up and return to my room.

I put down my futon and try to sleep.

I couldn’t sleep.

If you were to ask me why I am struggling to sleep, then I would like to say the excitement is too much for me to sleep.

But that is not the case at all.

My mind is blank.

My thoughts are in disarray.

I can’t think of anything.

I try my best to fill my brain with something.

But it doesn’t stick.

My heart beats loudly.

I look out of the window

Today is a new moon, so it’s extra dark outside.

...

...

I still couldn’t sleep.

So, I wake up, get out of my room, and head to a balcony behind the house with the garden in view.

I look up.

Twinkling stars,

Deep blue sky.

Reminds me of a huge ocean.

The waves rhythmically hit my leg.

It’was dark.

I was crying.

I got lost and have nowhere to go.

I regretted going to that picnic so much.

It was like a play coming to an end.

Closed by the curtains made of branches and leaves.

My loud voice was the only audible thing around.

It was like the world was telling me that the play is over and everyone has to go home.

But I have nowhere to go.

Then a girl with crimson hair, which blended in the autumn leaves, with brusies on her hands and the mud on her dress seemed like someone who was out of this world.

I was a child, so I couldn’t understand it.

But in that moment, she became my hero.