1. Greg.
I met Greg on Discord in a server I was pretty active in at the time around the beginning of 2024. He was cute, sweet, and charming, with ginger hair, standing around 5’10”. He was originally from Brooklyn, New York, and there was something about him that caught my attention.
Around this time, I was going through a difficult breakup and struggling to figure out where I was going to live next. Life felt uncertain, and I was trying to find my footing again. I decided to take a road trip to New York City, which would be my first time driving there since I had always traveled by plane before. I planned to spend two or three days in Brooklyn, and Greg ended up being part of that experience.
Before the trip, we had already established that we were attracted to each other and that sex was likely going to happen. We were both grown, we wanted to, and neither of us seemed to have any hesitation about it.
During my stay, Greg spent two out of the three days with me. He showed me around a little, although I wouldn’t say he gave me the full New York experience. Still, one thing happened that made me think he genuinely cared about me as a person.
My 2011 Chevrolet HHR’s battery died while I was in New York. Greg took multiple buses to get a portable jump starter so I could get my car going again. We split the cost, but he told me to keep it because he didn’t need a car in New York with all the public transportation available. At the time, I appreciated that gesture. It was thoughtful, and it made me feel like he was willing to show up for me when I needed help.
Unfortunately, what happened after the trip changed how I viewed the entire experience.
I later discovered that Greg had been privately messaging another girl I considered a friend. He was telling her that the sex we had “could’ve been better” while also flirting with her and trying to pursue something with her. To make matters worse, I found out through someone else that Greg had already decided he didn’t want to pursue a relationship with me.
He never came directly to me to communicate any of this. Instead, he was comfortable discussing our intimate experience and his intentions with someone else while leaving me to find out the truth on my own.
And that was the part that bothered me most.
I could have accepted him not wanting a relationship. We’re all entitled to change our minds, and having sex with someone doesn’t mean you’re obligated to become their partner. What I couldn’t respect was the way he handled it. If he was grown enough to sleep with me, he should have been grown enough to communicate honestly with me afterward.
I had spent my own money planning a trip that I hoped would become a memorable experience. Greg was supposed to be part of that experience, but instead, I left with a memory that was far different from what I had imagined. Yes, he helped me when my car battery died, and I won’t pretend that gesture meant nothing. But one thoughtful act doesn’t automatically make someone considerate in every other aspect of a connection.
Looking back, I wish him the life he deserves, whatever that may look like. I can’t change what happened, and I can’t force someone to treat me with the same consideration I would give them.
But I can decide what I take away from it.
And Greg taught me that lesson early.
Lesson: A thoughtful gesture doesn’t always mean someone has thoughtful intentions.
