Chapter 1
It all started with a dream….
The ground was cold under my bare feet as I ran through the forest. The trees blocking the moon light with their branches. I could feel my heart pounding as I ran. Running and running to somewhere unknown to me, but I knew I was on the right course. Soon, I saw a break in the tree line ahead, the light breaking up the darkness. I ran faster and faster until I broke through the tree line.
The sky above burst into view, stars blanketing the night sky. The moon hung effortlessly, full and bright, in the sky. The trees circle this open field, looking like a wall blocking off this quiet place. I fall to my knees, trying to catch my breath, as I do, my airways are filled with the sweet calming smell of lavender. I look around and saw the purple hued flowers sprinkled throughout the clearing. I reached out and brushed my fingertips against the petals. They felt so soft and delicate, so much so a simple breeze could blow them away.
I slowly get to my feet and walk towards the center of this clearing. The sounds of owls and nightlife filled the air around me. Some may find it frightening, but not I. I have always felt the strong sense of comfort outside in the night. The gentle light of the moon versus the harsh light of the day is preferable.
Then from nowhere, music started to play. Ever so quietly at first and growing slowly in volume. It was the sound of drums and pipes, begging someone to dance to them. I started slowly finding the rhythm and let the music take me. Spinning and twirling, almost as if I was floating around the field, feeling my soul as light as air. The night sky dancing off the dew of the flowers and grass. Then the wind picked up, swirling around me, rustling the flowers into the air. Petals floated on the breeze, the scent of lavender strong in the air. In that moment, it felt like Peace.
Suddenly the smell of brimstone stung my nose, snapping me out of this peaceful moment. I stop dead in my tracks, trying to determine where the scent is coming from. Fear ripped through me, and my heart started racing. I whipped my head around, desperately trying to find the source when suddenly, I saw something. A figure standing on the west end of the clearing, near the tree line, a dark smoke hanging around like a fog. Glowing ember eyes burning against the darkness.
Our eyes locked, and I froze in place, unable to move. As if on cue, the figure stepped from the tree line into the clearing. It was a man. Short, messy black hair, tan skin as if he spent all his days in the sun. He was tall and medium build, like he has known trials and labor. My heart was beating in my ears, overpowering the music in my ears, but something deep inside me behind the fear whispered to trust him. As he got closer, I felt the ground heat up under my feet, the hot air stinging my lungs as I breathed in.
I tried hard to make my body move, to do anything. As he was a few feet away, I could feel my legs start to shake, feeling weak. And now he was right in front of me, inches away. My legs could no longer hold me, and I collapsed. His arms catch me, and he holds me against him. I can feel the burning heat from his arms as if it threatens to burn right through me.
His eyes burned into mine. I couldn’t speak, my brain turned into mush. I can feel his chest rising and falling with each breathe. The look on his face was almost sad, like he was conflicted about something swirling behind his eyes.
His lips part as if he was going to speak, my heart pounding in anticipation.
Just then, a scream ripped in the air around us. He raises his arms to cover his ears, dropping me. The ground didn’t catch me, continuing to fall, watching him grow farther away. Falling into the darkness, surrounded by the sound of the scream. It felt like my soul was being ripped into pieces. Then I hit the ground…..
Waking up in a cold sweat and heavy breath is not my favorite way to wake. I sit up, trying to catch my breathe. I wish I could remember the dreams that cause this, to maybe try to prevent it. I glance at my phone and see it’s 5:30am. I had another hour till I have to wake up Max for school.
I unplug my phone and swing my legs off my bed. The cold floor sends a shiver up my spin. I walk over to my bathroom and turn on the light. My reflection looks worse for wear.
My hair falling out of my bun, sticking to my neck and forehead, dark circles under my eyes. I turn on the shower to the hottest setting, to wash off the aftermath of that unknown dream. I unclung my sweat soaked shirt and climb into the shower. Feeling the heat hitting my body was comforting. Standing there under the water, I let my mind go blank, my one moment to relax in the day.
I closed my eyes and focused on my breathing. Inhale and exhale. Inhale and exhale.
Things haven’t been easy this last year. My parents died in a car accident, leaving me to take care of my little brother, Max. He’s only 6 years old. So, I go from being a working college student to a caregiver.
My days are busy between taking care of Max, classes, and my part time job at the local coffee shop near campus, Luna’s Coffee Co. I just didn’t see my life going like this. I’m in my last year of school and was picturing moving to New York, away from this small town of New Berlin, Texas.
My phone alarm goes off, telling me to wake up to make breakfast for Max. I climb out of the shower, wrapping myself in a towel. The bathroom heavy with steam, I start the morning routine. It’s my one thing that stays the same. My curly hair was always a process, and the routine helps me stay sane. I should probably get a haircut soon, since it’s midway down my back.
I change into a baggy black t-shirt and some black leggings, which seems to be what I tend to wear most days. I slip on my black vans and walk out my bedroom. I walk over to Max’s room and give it a light knock. “Max, it is time to get up.” I said, as I turned on his bedside lamp in the shape of a dinosaur. I hear his mumbled response and I turned to walk to the kitchen. I turned the light on in the kitchen. The pale green of the walls faded from the once vibrant green that it was when I was younger. My parents never had a chance to repaint it since they had Max.
I walk to the fridge and pull the egg carton with some cheese. I turned on the gas stove and place the skillet on the stove. Cracking two eggs into the skillet and sprinkling a little cheese, I let my mind drift to a memory of my dad cooking breakfast in this kitchen while mom chased me around the island. The laughter and joy in this house were all I wanted back.
My heart still breaks thinking that Max won’t have memories like that about mom and dad. I grabbed the fork and stirred the eggs. I gasp as the fork became hot in my hand and dropped into the eggs. Suddenly, the heat reminded me of something I just can’t remember, like an itch in my brain I can’t scratch. I grabbed another fork and picked the other one out of the eggs. I moved the finished eggs to a plate, grabbing to clean forks, and tossing the dirty ones into the sink. I place the plate of eggs on the table and went to the cupboard to grab the bread. Popping four pieces into the toaster, I start the coffee maker. There was no way I was going to survive this day without.
I hear his little footsteps running down the hall. “Good morning, Raelyn”. I greet him with a smile. Max decided he was going to wear his Avengers sweatshirt and some red pants, along with his vans which match mine. I scooped him up into a huge hug and placed him at the table. “Do you want orange juice this morning or milk?” I say while swinging the fridge door open. “Orange juice please., he said with a little dance in his chair.
I grabbed the orange juice from the fridge and a cup from the dishrack. Putting the toast on the plate, I gathered everything and placed it on the table. Max seemed excited for our breakfast time. “You ready for school today?”, I asked while putting a slice of toast in my mouth. Max smile and said with a mouth full of cheesy eggs, “I am! Today is show and’ tell and I know exactly what I am going to show.” I smiled at him and hurried to finish breakfast. I placed the cleared off dishes into the sink for me to clean tonight and I grabbed his lunch I made the night before from the fridge. A pasta salad with chicken, a side of crackers, and a juice box. For a 6-year-old, he eats pretty good.
He comes running back down the hallway with his backpack slung over his shoulder. I gathered my things I need for the day and placed his lunch in his backpack. When I opened it, I saw what he was bringing for show and tell. It was a family photo of us a week before the accident. I held my breath, gazing at the photo of our smiling faces. My heart daring to break, tears begging to drop from my eyes, but I don’t dare let that happen. I close my eyes and take a deep breath, closed his backpack, and we headed out the door. We climbed into my red kia soul and left he house.
As we were driving to pick up my best friend, Cameron, from his house so we can go to work, Max wanted to be DJ. So, I handed my phone to him and let me scroll through my music library. We pulled into Cameron’s apartment complex when Max finally picked a song to play. He decided on my Red-Hot Chili Peppers playlist. I scanned the parking lot and noticed a new car in the lot. It is a small complex with about 20 units in it. Very rarely people move out and I had no idea there was an opening. The car was an old slick black impala, with the windows tinted, but I could barely make out that there was something hanging from the rearview mirror.
It was a sweet looking ride and the who must own must either be an older man going through a middle life crisis or someone who can’t even fathom the car they drive. I shook my head and refocused in the car.
Cameron was exited his apartment; bag slung over his shoulder and opened the passenger door. “We are going to be late!!”, Max screamed as soon as the door opened. Cameron and I let out a laugh. “No, we won’t little man. Not with your sister’s driving.”, Cameron said while getting settled into the car. I just simply remained silent and headed to the main street.
As I drove, Cameron and Max were singing their hearts out to the playlist, having a total jam session. I don’t know how I would’ve handled this last year without him. Cameron has been my rock since the accident. Helping me take care of Max, covering shifts, and occasionally helping me with the housework. I got ownership of the house after my parents passed, and it has been a struggle to maintain with my schedule. Between work, classes, and Max; I can’t seem to get everything done. Cameron has been the best friend I could ever ask for. I glanced at him while I drove. His short blonde hair whipping as he headbangs to the song, his blue eyes filled with happiness I haven’t known in a while. His lips curved into a smile with one dimple on his left cheek. His tall slender frame makes my car seem small. His freckles that only decorate a few spots on his cheek. He sees me looking and gives me a small smile. I smile back and focus back on the road.
We pull into the drop off line for Max’s School, waiting patiently for the teacher on drop off duty to open the door and take Max inside. I turned down the music and turn to look at Max in the backseat. “Remember, be good today and eat all your lunch or we won’t be able to have our Monday Movie night.”, I say to help motivate him to eat all his food. He gives a salute and bounces in his seat as the teacher approaches. She opens the door, giving us all a friendly smile and escorts Max to the school building.
While I am driving us to campus, Cameron was rattling off movie ideas for tonight. He seemed to stuck between Bug’s Life or The Black Cauldron. Personally, I loved The Black Cauldron so that had my vote. We pulled into a spot close to Luna’s and got out of the car. Cameron had classes first while I had the morning shift. He said Bye and dashed down the sidewalk. I proceed to walk to the coffee shop when something suddenly felt off. Like someone was watching me. I look around but no one was out and about yet. Everyone was already in class or in the library since final’s week was coming up, or in Luna’s. I shrug it off and head forwarded to the shop. As I get the door, I stop and look at my reflection. My curly hair frizzy from the morning dew, my black shirt hiding my figure and my eyes looking sad. Right when I was about to walk in, I see a figure in the reflection. It was a dark figure, a little ways back and it sent a chill down my spine. I spun around, but nothing was there. I pulled open the coffee shop door and entered quickly, trying to forget the figure and why for a second it felt so familiar.
