Grant Ayers

HEY CHECK OUT MY STORIES!!! LOL

I'm a young author with a published book. You can check out "The Inevitable War" at Amazon or at Dorrance bookstore

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Werewolf

So I read all the way through the book (7 chapters at the moment) and can say a few things about it. So the plot of the story so far has revealed that Femi (The MC) and Nick's (The guy that you technically meet early on but not really, lol) kids are missing and they have to go find them or they will go find them. It's sort of unclear as of right now. But the great thing that I've seen in the plot is the author's way of showing us her characters. Femi is a cringy sort of person with life in her eyes. She's chaotic, beautiful, and wild. Amazing character. Whereas Nick is more calm but still cringy. And with both of these characters, the author really provides them each with their own unique voice. So for the plot, I'm going to give it five stars.
Now the author's writing style I would have to say is also chaotic. Because there are some pieces of it where you can tell that the author either took a break or just wanted to fast travel through the "boring" part. Which is sort of lazy (take that pill how you want it), but then you get to parts like the dialog where it's beautiful. The author uses the body language of the characters to simple facial expressions to really up her game when it comes to the emotions that Femi portrays. And how I would fix that first part of the author's story is just gritting my teeth and doubling down on some details. Like the forest, explain the sun, the ground, the sky, the trees themselves, the aroma, and the overall feeling. The job scene, go into more details there. And so on and so forth. Because of missing details like that, I'm going to give the writing style a three.
Now, we get down to technical writing skills which I have a few opinions on. One it's seven chapters in early development. So the author is in the writing stage where she shouldn't be looking for corrections but instead should be looking for plot holes or what the story will be looking into next. But from what I saw the author did really well in her spelling and grammar so big points on that. And as for technical writing skills I like to add creativity in this slot. Like how creative was the story and what can audiences get from it if they are looking for a book to read? And here is a few reasons why I think I've read this book and took interest in it. One it's a slow burn of a book which just means that you can take your time reading it, absorbing the beautiful emotions the author portrays. The second reason is that the characters are unique and can make you laugh and smile. The third reason is I think outside of the werewolf genre this author does something unique that I really don't want to spoil. So creativity is there and I think it's really the star of this whole novel. So writing skills get a five star.
With a nearly perfect score, the book deserves a nearly perfect overall rating of four. I say this because, with a few adjustments, this would be a star on the shelves in real life. I truly believe that.

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amazing

I thought your story was amazing to say the least. I hope you keep writing and one day gets this work published.

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scp 049

SCP vibes. Cool

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cool

it was a really good story. I 1000% recommended

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worth the read

it was worth the read

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Sorry

Okay so I'll try and point out everything in the comments but I hate to drag your story through the mud here. Because what you do really well is character development. But it is the emotional portrayal that is not hitting home. All your characters talk like robots with he said she said type of deal. Mix that up and I'm 100% sure that the story would be a five-star.

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Cool

It's a great story, can't really say much else.

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I don't like it

So I know that I'm supposed to give reasons, and I will but keep an open mind. Stories ain't written like this. This type of writing style, the way that it's plotted out, is just overall trash in my eyes. I don't like it and that's my opinion. And why I would give it an overall rating of three stars. And on top of that, there is misspelling and everything is in italics. Why? This isn't how you write a story. I'm sorry. It has a few good things about it. LIke characters. That's about it.

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Great

I should rank this story lower because it's only one chapter. Actually, I think I will because not a lot can be said about it. I don't know what people expect when they ask for a review for a book that only has one chapter in it. you can't judge it really. I got nothing from the first chapter.

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Sad

I think the novel is a bit sad but with it only being at three chapters who knows what can happen? So go check out the book.

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Great story

So I know I'm late to review this, but I found the story really good and would recommend that you take an interest in it as a reader.

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Okay

So let's get down to the finest of details of the story. One thing that I like about this story is that it's not what you think it would be. Like it's only four chapters at the time of this review. So without getting that fifth chapter, I can't tell you anything about the plot without A, spoiling, and B, without just telling you all about the book. So it's my opinion that I'll rate the plot at four stars. Because I think there were just a couple of elements left out of the story that I couldn't read right now. And with this being a review swap I couldn't wait longer to review it. And so in chapter 4, I have to say that the character is good but there is a lack of action, something to push the plot forwards so far.
The writing style is okay, I think the author ends their chapters too abruptly but again that's just my opinion. And with that said I think that the author could find better ways to cap off her chapters. Because everything up till the end of the chapters is amazing with only the ending feeling incomplete. Like the author was in a rush to finish the chapters. Which is never nice to read about. So docking a star for that as well.
As for grammar and all that I didn't see any mistakes so five stars.
Sorry for the quick review but with this score being 13/15 I think it deserves either a five or four-star. With the story being incomplete at the moment I'll give it a benefit of the doubt and give the overall rating of five stars.

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Damn

So let's go through this one step at a time. Your summary is legit bigger than all of your chapters. Like,.. It hurts to read. It took me fifteen minutes and like that, I wasted fifteen minutes. The story was none, existent guy. I hate to be like this but we'll begin with your plot.
I'm going to be rough and say that I'm docking three stars off the bat. One for your summary is longer than all of your chapters. another star because I didn't get what you were trying to relay in the story. All I got was that it was about terrorism. And that's all. You're not painting a picture, you're not informing, you're not telling a story. So I think that your plot suffers from the lack of detail and just having no thickness to it. And the third star because I'm just upset at reading such a thing. Like I know that's not a valid reason so I'll give you your third reason why I think the plot is worth of being a two-star. It is a book that maybe took the writer a total of maybe an hour to write. It was simple, not over-detailed, and could have really just not existed. I know it's harsh but I don't think the author was serious when they wrote the story. And so I'm giving the plot a total of two stars.
Okay, writing style time. This is where the author catches a break. So writing styles can vary and each author has a unique writing style. As I said above the author was not very detailed or informative. So what makes this writing style worth at least four stars? I give the author the benefit that they can at least write clearly. No mistakes were seen and no misspells. Plus the words used were big and juicy. That part of the story was the best part. Looking up the definition for the big words that were used. So the author gets 4 stars on writing style. And while we are at it the technical portion is five stars.
At the end of the day, the author succeeded in writing a clean manuscript with little to no errors. But at the great cost of the plot and the story itself. And as a writer, author, and journalist I think that even though the total of the story would be 11/15 which would give it a three-star I have to go with my beliefs. Which is the belief that the plot itself is the most important thing in writing. And sure you can have a neatly written and correction-free book but if the plot is nonexistent or bland then who is going to read it? So I say this as kind as I can. The story International Criminal in my eyes is worth 2 stars. I'm not going lower one because I don't want to come off as attacking this writer. And two because the story is edited to perfection. It truly does look great. And at the end of the day, it's my opinion. And I can't prove to inkitt why I scored the plot so low. I can really only say that there wasn't one to really follow and it didn't connect with me. So if you are a reader and you feel the need to prove me wrong then, please. Pick up this story and delve straight into it.

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Great story

Needs a bit of editing but otherwise great read

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Great story

I think there were up and downs but overall I think I would recommend it to a friend.

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The One That Was Taken

So here we are again with a three-chapter book. And this is what I got from it. As it is still in progress I can't really judge the plot of the story as there is not a thick enough one to go off of. It's too early to say who's my favorite character, and overall, it's a fast-paced story. I don't even think that all three chapters combine equal five pages. But the author gets their kudos when it comes to writing a plot that is hooking. In every chapter I wanted to know what would happen next, what was going to be the upcoming cliffhangers,.. and so on. The characters themselves are awesome, adventurous with a little bit of fucked up, meaning relatable, lol. And I think that if I did have to pick favorites mine would be Adriano. Thinking that this is only the beginning and not wanting to be harsh I'm going to give the plot five stars. Because I didn't see anything wrong other than the pace of it. And face pace can work, and it has so far.
Now writing style. It reminds me of when I started professionally writing a year ago. Flawed and a little too box-like. Boring in other terms, wanting to explain every little thing to the minute detail. With that said the other does feed us information about the story but either put it in awkwardly or too blunt. Like in chapter three the very last paragraph, chapter two paragraphs the first three sentences and then goes on to the sixth and seventh sentences. Was put awkwardly or didn't put enough emotion into it. So I'm docking a point for your writing style is still new, not experienced enough to write something that is encompassing your vision perfectly. Meaning it'll get better after time. But that time isn't now and not with this story. So four stars.
Now, this is where I might step on some toes if I haven't already. I have no intention of being mean or trying to get this author a bad score on purpose. The punctuation, grammar, and sentence structure is messed up, and some words aren't spelled correctly. Not that big of a deal but worthy already of a docked point. I would normally not dock a point if it was only one or two words but there were at least six or seven different words misspelled. And I'm docking another star because of the awkward sentence structure that I already mentioned. So three stars.
Okay now as we get into the overall rating I think that it's best to remind you that out of 15 stars the story would be a 12/15. And that's cool since some stories can't even get 10/15 on this app. The story The One That Was Taken is a clever story with amazing characters and a plot that I think is acceptable and hooking. If you're into a thriller romance subplot then this is the story for you. I would suggest this to my friends. But wit the flaws that it has now I'm going to give it an over all rating of four stars.

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Great overall

So the sex scenes were very vivid but the story was lacking. I just couldn't get connected with the characters. And then there were the whole dialog tags that were wrong. Plus the misspells there and here in the chapters. Either way, though I would give it a second read.

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damn

I know I have to explain but it's all just going to be slander. The story is easy to predict and the writing style is very blunt and robotic. And don't get me started on the technical stuff. It's bricks of words after bricks of words. On top of that, I think the author spelled the book's name wrong. Angel is spelled A-N-G-E-L. So when you read the title of the book it reads out like "Oh please return to me obtuse angle." It's funny. This is ironic because the story itself isn't. It's very serious about kids doing kids' stuff. I feel like a jackass too saying this stuff. Like overall it's one chapter that I'm reviewing. So I can't comment on the plot because the plot hasn't developed, The writing style can change later on and I'll look like a fool. And as for the grammar and formatting, its terrible but a simple edit will fix all that. So with everything said, Scarletlove I think there's room to grow. And maybe when it's around the fifth chapter I can change the review. Because I'm sure you're talented and I want to see you grow. The one thing that I'll say that you absolutely just hit out of the park with, was your dialog. You made your characters have an individual voice. So great for you. I hope you keep writing.

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Found my reflection

So with only there being two chapters, I can't really go off of anything besides what is already written. And the way I judge and review stories I'll be going through them and tell the reader why you should read it and what the author can do/ what my opinion is. Let's begin with the plot. While I do think it is interesting because the characters really bring it to life and give it that suspense that most romance stories have I also think that it's very rushed. Like we are introduced to a new character every chapter (That's not saying much as there are only 2 chapters) as we get pushed into another person's perspective. So I think I'll dock a point in the plot because it's hasty and unclear.
Next up is writing style. This novel is written like a movie script. And that's not to say that the writing is bad but there are downfalls to this hasty type of writing. Where the characters feel more alive the background lacks. Because that's what writing a movie script is like. You provide a vague place and allow the dialog to tell the story. And you see that in this book "Found my reflection in your soul, " it just reads as if the author is rushing his story. Again this goes back to point one of the plots right where I say that the pacing of the lot is rushed. And this writing style doesn't benefit the plot downfalling it just the same. So with that said I think that it's fair to dock the writing style a star.
Lastly, we have writing skills. The grammar was off as a few sentences and a few dialog tags were missing commas and sometimes just missing a letter in a word. An example would be chapter one-third sentence of the second paragraph. With the formatting also not being your typical novel format instead portrayed as a movie script format is just not my taste. I don't think it works for most novels. With that said I'll dock that two stars. One for the mess-ups in grammar I suggest a pro writing aid and the other star for the formatting of the book itself.
So the overall score would be 11/15 which would be around the low C area. And therefore I'm going to give the overall rating 3/5 stars. The story is hooking maybe a little difficult to read, but overall I can't wait for more chapters to read. It has potential and the author is really good and giving each individual character their own voice. I hope that the author takes my constructive criticism. Because the problem that they have is formatting and just a couple of edits to make. And I would slow down the pacing of the story by a tad because it just all felt a little rushed within the first two chapters. So reader come check out the story "Found My Reflection In Your Soul" by Reecha K

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Here

Have the stars. I laughed my ass off.

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K-belmonte

There was a review just like third from the top and I think I agree with it and say that the story had ups but mostly downs. Like grammar was a big hit to this book out of everything else. Like it was confusing who was talking which made the story frustrating to read. Plus the constant addition of plot points and characters made it harder to attach yourself to a character and what they can do. I read up to chapter five and said that I think I should put it down. Now where the story did well was the descriptions of characters and backgrounds. But you can have a cool-looking character and a cool background but without a decent story that is somewhat easy to follow your just not going to have a cool book. So sorry if this sounds harsh but I think points have already been made and I can't just copy and paste another person's review because well, plagiarism, but K-Belmonte took the words out of my mouth and I agree 100% with his review.

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Didn't connect

The plot in my opinion wasn't able to connect with me on a personal or emotional level. But with that said the book is perfectly written and I can see others liking it.

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Demons!!!

I want to say The Office/Riverdale/Harry Potter/Percy Jackson vibes. The twist is that there are fucking demons!!! The idea is cool and I didn't read any mistakes so good for the author on that bit.

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Great

So I would say if you just broke up your paragraphs this would be a five-star rating all the way down. That and if you maybe bump the speed up a little bit. But that's just a suggestion. Either way, it was a good two-chapter read.

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Great novel

So I read up to chapter five and it's a slow burner of a book. Right now in chapter five, it's picking up quite nicely. My favorite character is Fergus because he just is relatable and just a badass of a guy. Now the main character is a female that I found forgettable and sorry if that's the case just my personal opinion. The descriptions were okay like the background was either there or not. If the background was described then it would just be two characters talking or fighting. A lot of info dumping too. But that's not a bad thing I love a good info dump.

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Lovely

Lovely story

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cool

So the problem that I have with this book is that I just don't like nor do I think it compares to that of other erotica. Like erotica doesn't just have to be about sex. While sex does play a key role in erotica, the sex itself is secondary to the development of the characters and plot. A good erotica writer knows that, no matter how great the sex is, there still needs to be a good, solid story if one wants to hold a reader's interest. And this story lacks any good story. And then it also lacks in the sex department too. So both of that kind of make me want to just give the story a three-star. But I do have to give credit where credit is due. For instance, I think that the best part of the book was the description of the characters. There were a few spelling mistakes as well but who gives a shit about that? Like it's a free book that will one day be worth something so I'm just glad that I got to read it now. Maybe in the future, the author will work out these kinks. I don't know how they'll do it but I imagine it would take 1 a lot of coffee, 2 a whole new plot line, 3 and a few emotional breakdowns. Kidding on that last part. But I do hope that the author continues to write.

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Generic

Like want fantasy and bad assery then check this book out. There's a few spelling errors but what really weighs the book down in my opinion is that it was more or less a classic predictable story.

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Fire

😎👍🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥

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Loved all three chapters

Love all three chapters and all of the concepts.

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Funny

It goes in and out of 1st person pov and 3rd person pov. That enough is what is making this book a three star because a lot of it was hard to read. But what could be read was very hilarious. So read it if you want to laugh

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Loved the twists

This is a story that kept me on my toes. Now it's a short story that felt like a whole movie. Oh and that twist at the end there wasn't something I expected. Like it was a whole moment captured perfectly.

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Great

So I want to say that the story itself was great the author knew how to write and manipulate emotions through her characters. Sylvester was my favorite character out of everyone. But what the author struggles with is separating dialogue tags and maybe just thickening a few details of the story that I think I would love to see as a reader. But I would say that this book is a solid 4/5 stars. Because the dialogue tags made it very confusing who was talking and this made it harder to imagine the story. Oh, and the plot felt rushed and a little unclear. Because the train of emotion was, happy, sad, angry, happy, horny. In that order lol. but I'll be clear. If the author interacts with this review I'll bump it up to 5 stars because one author interaction is excellent and because maybe they can explain a few things for me. But in the meantime, you should for sure check this story out.

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Interesting concept

So the idea of the entire book is original and a very fun thing to think about. Imagine if your first love, your "first time" and blam have to marry that person. I was laughing because my friend had just told me about his first time and how he hated it. Lol. But I wish there were more of a reason why the law exists where you have to marry the first person you exchange a sexual experience with. With that said the formatting was terrible and the whole thing was just a big block of text. That could easily be fixed so I'm not going to rag on it too much.

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Ayaan

The main character is relatable and fun to read about. And just seeing how everyone interacts with him just gives an all-around cheery feeling you can tell that the author was having fun with this story. I liked the setting, the plot, and just the atmosphere of the book.

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🔥🔥🔥🔥

Not much to go off right now. Dialogue was rough but the speech was amazing to read. I felt inspired from this one chapter and I think I would love to read more. I can see this book hitting shelves of every home in the usa

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Cool

The story was magnificent. Gave off a dark feeling and some really good heart warming chapters. The story kept spiralling slowly into darkness as Alex gets poked and prodded from life. I've read up to the seventh chapter but I plan on finishing it. I'm surprised that it hasn't had more attention.

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bad ass cover

I love the cover, and the story, and saw very few mistakes to nit-pick about. I can see this book going places. Great job author. And sorry it took me so long to write a review.

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15 chapters in

I read up to fifteen chapters and I have to say other than the missing commas the author didn't miss a single thing when it came to this story. The characters are relatable and I thought the story was really sweet.

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Great

So I've reviewed stories from one chapter to up to 90 and the similarity of the both of them is that every word is impactful in some way. I mean by this that the author has already shown us quite a bit with one chapter. Now it took me a week to get to it but now I have a regret. Lol. I should have read it sooner and I want to read more. I want to see these characters grow and show me a few twists. Oh, and before I continue, when I review stories, I base it on what I've read. So the grammar and writing style was good. I think that was truly extraordinary. But the plot is a 2 star because there is not a lot of plot to go off of as of right now. So with that said I think it's only fair to give it a two-star until the story grows. And I want to see that. Hopefully, this will be motivation.

P.s. I loved the story. I hope you continue writing. And that many readers get to see your imagination.

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Good Idea

So this whole thing is just his idea of what time is and how he views it. There is a quote and some other colorless points. And so there isn't a plot and it's complete by chapter 1. So, in my opinion, I think that the idea and his views are five stars. But when it comes to clarifying his viewpoint I think he could do better. Pull out more examples, more quotes, and just stretch your viewpoint a little so that it's understandable for someone who doesn't have the point of view. LIke I think time is something that we have in our grasp and that we don't just follow it. That we stand there and have a choice. To either follow it or make it into something amazing. And if this was your point or if I'm off topic then it's the writer for not clarifying. See what I mean? Like clarification and some more explaining and I think this would be a great little study for people to come to check out and maybe start up a conversation. Either way short and creative. Like it.

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I'm Batman

So I love the concept but there were just bricks of words and then the unseperated dialog and nearly any space. But with that said I would love to see more chapters instead you the author fixing the first chapter. Mainly only for one reason. Because like every single writer on this planet the more a person writes the better the writer. The more person edits the least amount of writing happens. But hey at least you'll be good at editing. LOL. What I'm saying is I want more chapters and your grammar could use a tad of tinkering.

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Go Nick

So I think the highlight of the entire story was chapter 4. Just because I love the descriptions. It was easy to read and If I'm correct it's still ongoing so if you're a reader this is your chance to influence the story in how it's written. Leave a comment and a like because this story is worth it.

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Loved it

Couldn't see anything wrong with the story. And hey if you want to argue about it read it and come back to me. But what I have to say about it is perfect characters, great emotional manipulation, and the background of the world is exactly what I wanted to imagine in a story.

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Wow

I liked it. It's short sure but it was the perfect day for a short story. I can't wait for more. This is what I love about inkitt. Is that you get to read a chapter a day and the author updates with fresh ideas. Love it and you as a reader should read this story as well.

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Bad Ass Read

I had fun reading the story. Truly the author has a gift for writing. As the characters were relatable and just amazing to read. Most of it was a movie inside my head as the descriptions were awesome and fluid. Amazing truly.

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Ok

I see why your other reviews are sorta speechless. Like the story itself was kinda stale but had its moments. Like a meh story. It kept me reading sure but not of interest but more because I was waiting for a little pizzazz. But we both know it comes and when it does I enjoy the heck out of it. So if your a reader then this one should be on your reading list.

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Good for one chapter

The beginning was great but with there only being one chapter there wasn't a lot to say about the book in a whole. Either way, you should read it you'll have fun.

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A harem story

So the story as far as I read makes me want to read it more. Only because I met the man named Andrew. The biggest douche in the world but yet I can see it ending with Weber in his arms. And just by reading a little fraction of what the story has the author showed me a world where this creative and strong woman meets all these different dudes and the interactions between the men and the main character made me burst out in laughter one of the best reads that I've had in a bit. Especially when it comes to romance.

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One Chapter Wonder

I loved reading this! I can't wait to find out what happens next. But putting everything in italics is off-putting. Overall it's a good start but it's way too early to review such a thing. More chapters, please.

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I laughted through the entire book

Not saying that this book is a joke. But for what is labeled a horror it was more like a dark comedy. Because the main character is so MESSED UP. Especially in the first two chapters. My favorite chapter in the book was chapter 6 and would tell everyone that if they can get there they struck gold. It's amazing to read the story and can't wait for it to be updated more.

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Edge of my seat worthy

I was thrilled to read this story. From the beginning to where the story is right now I was at the edge of my chair reading from my laptop just zooming through chapters. I think if anyone is interested in a fantasy/thriller they should hop on this book!

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Wait! I'll update this!

So off of the first chapter, it's needs editing. But I think I was warned that before reading this. So getting past all that I read this book as a reader. And what I thought was that I can't wait to read more chapters of this story. Because I honestly see this story reaching thousands of readers. It has potential out the ass in lamens terms.

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Not what it seemed

See when I first saw the cover I thought it was just going to be some sort of high school love triangle thing that I wasn't going to be interested in. But no this book blew my mind away with its badass fight scenes, cool characters, and a very brave female protagonist. There wasn't really one mistake that I saw reading it. Would 100% recommend it to any other person looking for a spectacular fantasy.

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Flawless

This story is fantasy. It's engaging, beautiful imagery, spectacular fight scenes, and spelling and grammar as far as that goes is just on point. This is a unicorn of stories. I think that if anyone has the time they should invest it in reading this story. I thought it was amazing to read it. Every second was just page turn after page turn. And the best part is that it's still going. I can't wait to read more chapters!

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Long but worth it

The story in itself is very long for the six chapters that it has. But while reading it I hardly noticed as chapter flew by one by one. It's an enticing book that deserves more readers.

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The immortal prisoner

I liked it. Yes I am the author and yes I am bias. But it was fun to write and I think that others can enjoy the short-story

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Great

The story was great

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chapter 5

so I've read up to chapter six and I can say there are ups and downs between chapters. Like there were times when the mood of the story would just drop on its head. With that said though I'm going to continue reading it and hope that others pick it up.

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Gods!

I like this book. It's one that I think a fifteen-year-old me would've loved to see on a bookshelf. The only real complaint I have is that I don't really like the cover. I feel like it should be more stoic but that's just my opinion. I do like the background myths and how the characters portray their emotions. Feels like I'm learning a lot about the history of this world that this author wrote.

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fuck yeah

great story

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five stars

five stars

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horrific

like it just wasn't my go-to thing to read. The chapters were great the spelling was tremendous but the plot was just too actual of a vibe.

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Awesome

The story is great and I would read it again.

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creative out the butt

It was beautifully written, the maps, the character art. All of it was great.

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Rad

I liked it and I think others would too. Keep writing and I'm sure the readers will keep coming in.

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Great

So I don't like the slow pace of it all but over all I think the story is onto something with the symbolism. Love that part of it all.

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lovely

I loved this story, great descriptions.

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need more chapters

The great story would reread it. Great characters, great description

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love the cover

I like the setting of this book it provides a very great insight into the characters and just amazing storytelling.

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great story

I know my reviews have been short lately and I'm sorry it's just that covid is somehow still relevant and I got it. Feeling like shit. But this story has been really nice to read while I've been stuck in my bed. And I would read it all again.

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love it

I would say it was one of the best stories I read here on inkitt

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the story is cool

So I think the story gets an overall five-star experience because I think I love the main character and it's sad. I think I nearly shed a tear reading the third chapter. With that said though the dialogue is weird and I don't like it. I think the dialogue is written poorly because there is a lack of it and what is written doesn't move the story forwards. And there also is a lack of description of characters. You get a huge wide view of their emotions and I would read this story just for how well the author portrays those emotions. But that is why the writing style is getting a four-star and as for grammar and all that dialogue tags could be better used. Especially in that first chapter where a bunch of dead souls is talking to the mc.

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Read it all the way

it was a cool ride

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coool

the story was cool and definitely should be read.

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Great story

The chapters were short and sweet, wish that more world-building happened with a few more detailed descriptions like characters and backgrounds.

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scary

I thought the story was good and I hope the author keeps writing.

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Amazing story

Great plot

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Thumbs up.

wish that there was more action personally but other than that the romance is amazingly portrayed and with no spelling mistakes that I saw.

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Sorry

the plot was just not,.. how can,.. Damn okay so the plot is just not inspirational or original, the horror and the female vampire are portrayed poorly and I could get down with the plot or the characters at all. Sorry, everything else is perfect but I just hate the main character and the whole story surrounding them. I hope you keep writing but I just can't point my finger at what was wrong other than the character and the sheer story surrounding them.

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rereading now

can't to read the story again it was that good.

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dedication

lot of work went into this novel and it was worth it. I thoroughly enjoyed it.

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Great story

I think others would like this story more then me but I didn't really see any big problems with it.

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So much horror

This is a great inspiration for other horror writers. Because you truly know how to set up a plot.

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spooky

The story was everything that I hoped it be.

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yes

Keep writing and I promise you'll have a reader.

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great story

Keep writing the story was amazing.

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great start

not a lot to go off of and the story isn't clear because there is only two chapters. With that said though I would read it if there were more. It's interesting to say the least.

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Lazy title

When life gives you zombies kill them. Which is a great little segway into what makes up this story. A lot of brain-bashing and emotional nipple-twisting. Found it funny most of the story though. Don't know if that was the goal but that's what it did for me so there's that.

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Great

So the cover is to die for. With that said the story has a few grammatical problems but none to big that it takes away focus. Plus fuck commas. Either way the plot is amazing and would read it for the plot alone.

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Sad and depressing.

Didn't like the story but I'm sure others would.

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Lovely

Amazing concept and a very great story.

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great

Maybe a bit cliche an unoriginal but I think the story itself is alright. It works.

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Bad ass story

Don't like the cover and that's my only complaint. The story and the mc make this a ride-or-die book and I'm in fully strapped! Loved the action and the plot. Truly felt like I was reading a female Rick Riordan piece. The author gets the feel of what camp half blood is supposed to be with the students and the adventures. Plus being a demi-god is always a great lead for any story. Felt like I was back in highschool.

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cap

First I'm not here to bring a story down but you're capitalizing and grammar needs a lot of work. And I'll be happy to point it out if I must but if I do it's going to sound like I'm degrading the story. And I'm not here to do that. I think that story itself is actually unique and I would love to reread it.

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Great

It's not a story I would read but I can see a lot of people storming over one another to get this from a Walmart. Soooo pick it up I guess and start reading.

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great story

not my thing but overall a good story.

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loved the story

The romance plot made me giggle but other than that it was a really fantastic read. Hope the author continues it.

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Great

The story had some of the best pacings I've ever seen. With that said thou it has one or spelling mistakes that didn't really hinder me but still feels deserving a docking one star in that department. Either way would recommend people to read it.

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great story

Now I know NaNoWriMo is almost half way there and writers are busier than ever. Hell, it was hard finding time to review this story but I can say that it's a huge inspiration. It's written perfectly no flaws in it. Now as for the story I would love to see more before further commenting. But I can see the future in it.

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Fast

So because I have over thirty stories to review I'm going a little fast reviewing after three chapters. But I think I can safely say that after reading this story I didn't see any mistakes and the pacing was actually very nice and smooth. I personally like the characters, especially Theos. Couldn't go wrong with this book. Please leave a review, a like, and maybe a comment. So the fast rating is 5,5,4,5

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Fast

So based on three chapters I will say that it's very fast-paced and action-packed. I think this book would be better in that genre. But as that is said I think that the pace could be slowed down and that certain details could be stretched out. So the fast rating is 4, 5, 4, 5. Nice score if you ask me. So check out this book and have a nice day.

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NaNoWriMo

I wrote this during National Novel Writing Month and appreciate all the feedback that I can. I'm enjoying writing the story so far and hope that others will like reading it as much as I have been writing it. Now it's edited to the best ability. Will try to rework it by the end of the month. Thank you for all of your reviews, comments, and likes on the story.

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b story

So imagine a B rated movie but transfer that into pages. It's okay but it's a one time read.

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Great story

I never felt such joy reading a story like this one on inkitt. Because it's well written and the story just hits.

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Cover to die for

Great story.

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Spooky

The story so far is truly terrifying and just coming out of Halloween I'm surprised that this story has little attention. I think it would be great. The only thing that I say that I don't like about it is the cover. But with that opinion out of the way, I truly believe that this story is one that all horror fans would love to read.

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Great story

It great story just fix up your grammar and it'll be perfect.

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cool

press the enter bar and the whole story is perfect. All of your dialog and paragraphs are stuck together.

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Should just stick with matt

Love all the perspectives and the story is really captivating. Now the problem that I got with the book was that the author switches pov with a lot of characters. Should mainly just stick with matt since he's mostly fleshed out and most relatable though.

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Great story

The only complaint that I have is that it's a slow burner that doesn't use dialog tags correctly. And with that said pick up the story. I'm sure you'll like maybe.

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Sorry for the harshness

so it's a three-star story because there is a lack of emotion within the writing and the plot is heavily overlooked.

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Read it liked it

Go and read this story. Sure there are a few misspells and things like that. And sometimes you can't tell who's talking. Wich effected the plot of the story. Either way, check this book out.

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Mistakes

So I think that story is alright but there are just mistakes through out it that I didn't really appreciate. The main character was practically mute. And there was little information as to why are what was going on. So yeah four stars all across.

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Grand

Great, let's get down to this review!!! So the goal of an evaluation is to inform others why they should or shouldn't pick up said book that you reviewed. With that said let's say why you should. The pros to this book is that the technical side of things the book is perfect. Didn't see any problems, considering most books on inkitt are unedited. Now as for the plot I think the ending for each chapter could have been written better. Plus I don't know if the story is a callback or not. Because it kept switching tenses. With that said though the writing style is great. It's dramatic, to say the least. Which is awesome. Now I wouldn't read this book if you don't like witches or a slightly confusing plot.

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Spooky

The story was a tad scary. Which is a good thing. Read this story.

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Chaos

So let's get back in the groove of reviews. A review is a person's opinion on the book itself and why people should or shouldn't read the work. And the way I go about reviewing other people's work here on inkitt is that I break it down for each category first and then give my overall.
First of all the plot, was somewhat confusing with a lot of it due to having a melancholy-like character. Who takes the news of being an angel, a divine creature, very well? I think a thing born to believe it's human would be a little freaked out at such news. And then for the same said character to be enveloped in chaos and a very unforgiving world would be a little more "dramatic" and not calm. And let's say the writer was going for calm then I think it was being portrayed poorly. Because the scene, the dialog, and the overall characters in it make it want to feel more dramatic. So with that said the plot itself right felt a little twisted and not exactly on its right path. So I'll give the plot a four-star rating. Because where it was good I think that its message or the overall story just wasn't portrayed well enough to make the plot perfect and less confusing.
The writing style I think the author excels in is deep meanings, symbology, and figurative speech. But emotion manipulation, neatness, or details I think the author lacks those. An example within the book is the overall tone of the main character, the backgrounds half the time weren't clear and it was as if the characters were within a blank canvas. So I'm giving the writing style of the work to be three stars.
And lastly, let's go in at the technical stuff. I hate to demean this work because I think that I would pick it up if it was in a library. And that I would sit down and open it up and read it all day. But there is a couple of misspellings and the author loves his parentheses. Just a tad too much with sometimes leaving the end of parentheses out. So yeah three stars.
so the overall rating of the story is going to be three stars but that doesn't mean one should turn this book away. This book is one for the deep thinker, the one that wants to get lost in the book because it challenges the way you think about people and yourself. But with the fantasy side of it, I think it lacks the emotion necessary to move you to read it for that aspect. So with that pick up The Epitomes because why not.

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cool story

Cool story just wasn't my thing.

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Great story

1/10 done with it and already I can say that I'm hooked. And I know any reader would be if they checked it out.

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Cool

I think that story is great with one problem, the characters are a little stale. But that's it. I would check out this story.

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Vamps

Great vampires.

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Cool story

I like how everything is written and with it being a decently thick story I found it easy to pick up without judgement. So go and check out this story.

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great story

it's a good story

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Amazing

So there are a few things to say about this. It's an awesome chick-flick with two very strong and awesome female leads. The plot going up to chapter 5 is awesome. The two sisters Hailey and her younger one (I forget her name so I apologize) are some of the best characters in the story. And the plot only drives them to be better. Just within the first couple of chapters, you are hooked because Hailey is a beast, just an absolute girly girl that can stand up for herself. Mwah. Love it. The plot itself is a five-star for me.
As for writing style, there are a few desperate attempts that the author goes for in terms of emotion. Now, this is just my opinion but there is such a thing as too much emotion. The book really gets drowned out in happiness and a little mellow drama. It's funny sure but I think it could be cut a little less. Either way, I don't think it's worth docking a star. But with that said the author's descriptions are good, her chapters are not too long nor are they too short and it gives off a nice flow. Great.
Okay, this is the part that all authors dread. Technical writing skills. There were a few misspellings. Oh no! Kidding. Well not really. What I mean is not to be dramatic about how little this really matters to me as a reader. Now as a writer this kind of sucked because it got me thinking about how much I needed to edit my stories. But as a reader it really only made me lose focus a couple of times. (Author please go check out chapters 2 & 3) But I'll only dock one star for that.
This story is a 14/15, which is a direct five-star book. Just off of the score alone, the author deserves this rating and I personally thought the story was amazing. So kudos.

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YAY

So the plot of the story is really amazing. The author does really well in painting a character and pinning their unique voices to each character. And it reminded me a lot of some of my beginning work. So I had a nostalgic taste in my mouth on top of feeling a new awesome book hit my eyes. It's original and just hits home in the fantasy realm. I hope to see more books like this one hitting Inkitt. So the plot of the story is five stars.
Now on to writing style. The author was very detailed in a lot of spots throughout the book. Maybe too much detail. In this, I mean that the pacing was amazing but every bit of info was just splatted onto the page. leaving too much to the reader. It's a book. Not a movie. You can take time to express your character. Where I do believe that the characters are good all about them kind of just gets spewed all in one chapter. Didn't like this so I'm going to dock a star due to plot dumping. But otherwise, the pace, the vocabulary, and just the overall feeling were great. So four stars.
As we go into the technical stuff I have a few things to say here about this story. One there weren't any spelling errors. I like reading a book without any spelling errors. As for grammar it also didn't skip a beat. But what the author sucks at is they put "continue" at the end of each chapter. Not "to be continued". but I'm not going to dock a star because of that. But I will say that if you can just word "continue differently the end of your books would look a lot better. So five stars.
Meaning your book scored 14/15!!! That means the overall rating is five stars. Because that is what your book is worth. I liked it from the beginning to the end. Keep up writing more chapters. I've added it to my list and am waiting for the next one. Thank you.

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Has a good thing going

So the plot right is Sapphire a badass girl that is making her way up the corporate business ladder. Then there is Derrick... He's Derrick. Your general businessman who got too snobbish for his golden Rolex. The plot revolves heavily around these two main characters who eventually meet up. A generic story with a great female lead. Which I think makes it a worthwhile read... If it was just her pov. Instead, the author writes it in a way where it's actually very hard to follow the story and keep your emotions attached to them. It feels heavily rushed. And with Derrick being sort of a useless protagonist. I completely think that 100% of what he does throughout the story could be a subplot or an underlying plot that can be hinted at through Sapphire's eyes. And the story would be better. But as it is right now I'm docking the plot of this story two stars. One for the inconsistent pov, and the other star because I didn't like your characters. And that's something big for any story. If your writing is 5/5. and your grammar is 5/5, and your backgrounds are 5/5, but your characters are a 1/5 then your story no longer is readable. Imagine if Harry Potter was a terrible character that we got very little detail on. Then that series wouldn't even be known. Because as readers we like characters over almost anything. So for the plot, I'm saying it's a three-star at best.
Writing style, as I've mentioned above you rush your story switching back and forth between Saphire and Derrick. So it's rushed, unedited, and does a meh job on the background. Now what you excel in is dialog. Even though the dialog tags are all wrong and messed up the actual wording had their voices. Like it was unique and their conversations and chats were interesting. But that's as far as the compliment goes. So docking a star. Four stars for writing style.
Okay, now we get to the technical stuff. The author doesn't capitalize, names, or places, and the worse sin amongst writers is that she doesn't capitalize their "i"s. That's a few problems right there that will be docking two stars from. Then there was a few wording problems with the story that just wrecked a chapter or two. docking another star for that. So technical writing skills are a two-star.
So the overall rating is 9/15. Ugh! That sounds so mean. When the story wasn't bad for a romance. The story was really cute just not rolled out well. And the biggest problem that the story faces is that technical bit. That's what is heavily affecting the score. Sure there is the plot, right? Yes, I do believe what I said when I said the plot was rushed and the characters, not even a dash relatable, or not even being able to connect with them because the author switches back and forth between the two of them. But if you love a female lead that kicks ass then this is totally a book that you should check out. And I wouldn't stop you. But with that being the score it's a low D at best. This means the overall rating for the book would be 2 stars. No hate, I left comments on what could be done to fix these and left over more than five constructive suggestions to better the story. The writer knows how to write a strong female lead. And they should lean more into that than this.

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Deep but edit

So how I do reviews is I go by the three main ratings and then add them all up to see what the total is. Because I think it's fair. And as for the plot of the story, I read up to chapter five. At this point in time, the story is at nine chapters. So reading over half of the novel and getting a good chunk out of it I can say a few things about it. First off the plot is okay. I think it just hits a few rough patches with delivery. Because the mood shifts from box, melancholy, romantical, drama, but never stays in it so long to bask in it. See the characters are good, the description of the background is meh, and for dialog, I think that it could be spruced up. Just to make it more emotional and dramatic. So as far as the plot goes it's very box-like and only really brings out emotion once in a while. Not very hooking to say the least. But the story itself from what I gathered is four people, all lovers to be, there's one that's a stubborn jackass but a sweet heart beneath it all, the other is a leader that once had a golden heart but had it crushed very very early, and two other women that I can't remember their names. But they were cute from what I remember with their interaction with the other cast. So for the plot, I'm docking two stars, because the main problem that the plot has it that theirs, is not a lot of emotion to connect to. Bearly enough to make it bearable to read, but not enough that it hooks and drags me through the pages. And as for the other reason is that along with little to no emotion the descriptions were meh at best. Not ever painting a clear picture for my mind. So three stars for the plot. #3
Now for writing style, I've mentioned that it's a very box-like way of writing. Very blunt tries to use emotion but fail. I think the author was trying their best to make it where we try to focus on the characters more than their surroundings and that's fine but not for this book. Like I'm not the author or the one that had this idea. So it's kind of harsh to say that bit. But there is a reason why authors go ass over the mouth with details in even the simplest kitchen. Because it paints an image that can sway audiences. And this fails to do that. It wants you to just picture the characters and that's fine too. It's not like it hasn't been done before. For instance, Wereworld by Curtis Jobling mainly focuses on the characters and very little background detail. But it's a fantasy action. Which is why that works. Because a battle scene is already a very clear picture in the reader's mind. So you don't have to go very detailed and can focus that detail on the characters. But for a story of this category, it just fails. So I'm docking two stars. Making the total for writing style down to a three.
Okay so last but not least technical writing skills. I'm glad to say that there were no spelling errors, no formatting errors, and the wording of sentences couldn't be better. The book excels in this with amazing grammar and spelling. And it deserves the five stars here. I just want to note that I'm not trying to be harsh. I did think that the content of the story could be great, it just was bland and very blunt in the details. Leaving very little or too much imagination for the reader.
But the story "The Rest Of Heaven" written by "Aquiteplace." (Sorry if I butchered it) is a story that shows struggle, and a melancholy plot as our heroes venture out into their world. I did look at the other reviews and saw that they were all five stars and said that they had terrific poetic structure and that the characters were cleverly plotted throughout the story. And that's cool. This review is mainly my opinion not meant to troll. Just a perspective. And my view was that the story was bland for a fantasy adventure novel to be. But I think you as a reader should strive to see the book for yourself and make your own opinion. But 11/15 is somewhere around a high C or a low B. And giving the story a benefit of the doubt I'll give it an overall rating of 4/5. Congratulations author.

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Great sex

Great sex scenes. Funny too.

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great

great story

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Beryl

So since the book is five chapters I can give somewhat opinions on the plot. Coming straight off the fifth chapter I can say that the drama romance that you will want to read has everything that one could want. Imagine Riverdale and Blue Bloods had a crossover. That explains the plot of the movie nearly to a T. And those are amazing shows known for their great story. Beryle gets five stars for plot and writing style as she makes it feel satisfying to complete each chapter and gives us a clever cliffhanger to end each chapter. Excellent writing. Now as for the technical stuff there were a few misspelled words. But not enough to deter the reader (me). So four stars for that one. You should read Beryle from Lyriccoffee because if you like drama, murder mystery, and romance then this is the book that you should pick up. Over all rating five stars.

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Great story

The only complaint that I have is that it's very melodramatic. But that's all.

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funny

The entire story is funny and great to read.

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coolio

read up to chapter five have to say go for it. Read it till your heart stops.

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coolio

listen I'm tired. Your story is very mild in terms of story writing, formatting, and just overall romance. And that is my opinion so sorry if you get a little salt in your feelings. But I hope others read this story. Have a nice day.

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Awesome

So the story is three chapters long I wasn't able to get anything really. The main character is dangerous and gives off a trickster character vibe. This is cool but we don't really get to see any erotica elements like there's no spice yet (Most erotica can be anywhere from 10% or 40% sex scene) but that's not a terrible thing. It's a very slow-paced novel with romance and bad boys being heavy. So with that the plot I'm going to give a four because we haven't seen elements of the story that I think is necessary, Then it comes to writing style and I think the author is very descriptive and allows a great imaginative flow to give the reader a sense of a romance blossoming from what could be a very toxic relationship. So five stars for writing style. As for grammar, there were a few words that weren't capitalized. Plus the formatting of the story is I think poor. Like each paragraph is unusually spaced out. But I'll only drop one star because I've seen other stories struggle with this and it might just be inkitt acting up.
So the overall score is 13/15 and I'll be a bit biased here and give praise where it is due. I hate romance stories. I think they're rotten and overdone as you have to see it as a subplot or just about anything that would allow it into any type of story nowadays. But that's my opinion on the entire genre. Now this book in particular I see potential in it. The descriptions are clever and clear, It's like watching a very short film in my head. And I could get into this one as it's pulling originality out of its butt and delivers what most romance can't. An unpredictable story. So I'm going to give Fire Meets Gasoline 5/5 stars. Hope the author keeps on writing.

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Cool

lovely and cool but can get boring at times and has grammar to fix up.

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hot

hot and steamy!!!

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spooky

So going off of two chapters I have to say this is going to be a very short story. Like I'm talking about there not possibly being any more than three more chapters coming. The pace of the story is very fast and you just don't get the connection needed for the suspense. So how I go about rating stories is I just go about it one thing at a time. So the plot of the story is short so I can't go full on it but to water it down big bad monster, a little frightened girl in the mountains. And the idea right is kind of stale like bread. It's been done before, written nearly like any other story like it, except that you try to exploit emotion through the damage of a family pet. Which is effective but makes the story feel like the dog was the only thing that we had emotionally invested in. So I think I'm going to dock the plot down two stars and the writing style one star.
As we head into judging the author's writing style keep in mind that I'm not saying don't read this story. I think that it's a decent two chapters and I have no idea what is going to happen next. The author could come out and surprise me and show me how she'll turn this generic book into something original and terrifying. But as her writing style goes I think that the author chooses a very lax way of writing, like not wanting to invade the reader's mind with description and allow the reader themselves to fill in holes. Like it can work. Especially in a horror-type setting. But it makes this story just feel truly unfinished (Which it is and I have kept that in mind) and like the author means to come back to these chapters and fill it up more. Which is good if they do decide to do that. But I think for this reason I'll dock writing style another star.
Now we get to the final rating and I honestly think the only thing that's wrong is the formatting. Every sentence and paragraph is spaced out heavily. But as for spelling and grammar, I think that author had no problems with them. And there must give that five whole stars. Because I didn't see a problem at all and it didn't disrupt the flow of the writing itself.
So the overall score would be 11/15 which would be around the low C area. And therefore I'm going to give the overall rating 3/5 stars. Because of the lack of creative talent, the very lazy writing style was just a no-go. I think that yes while you could maybe hook your readers you won't be able to keep them there for long. There was a heavy lack of description of both character and background. I couldn't connect with it and I'm sorry. I think that people should read it because it has the potential to be more. As I stated I am only two chapters in not giving me a lot of ground to work with in the first place. And with only there being two chapters I can't really review it. It's like telling a baby that they're already a failure even though they haven't done anything yet. And so if I was a random person scrolling through inkitt and saw this book I would add it to my "to be read" list and then wait as more chapters come by. Because all I really know is that there is just more to be read than what meets the eye as of right now.

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The Runaway

So it's a good story and coming from someone who doesn't like werewolf books because they're cheesy and easily predictable by a mile, and overused, and,.. either way, I love this story even though it's short right now. But it has enough chapters to review so let me give you reasons why you should pick up this story. So the book itself let's rate this as we go. So the plot of the story didn't have any kinks in it and is able to portray a relatable and conflicted character named Olivia in the first three chapters we get to see her home life, her romance that cannot be because of mental and social reasonings. The werewolf bit is not very important so it comes off as a drama almost which I can't complain about. I love a good romance drama. Now I know that it's a romantic action but I haven't been able to see any "action". So I think because I haven't been able to see an important element of the plot I'll dock it a star.
Now as in writing style the narration is great and the way the author writes dialog is really to be jealous over. I thought I was reading the works of Stephenie Meyer. Now I think backgrounds could be described a bit more. The character portion is amazing with the background kind of being a blurry image. So I'll dock a star for that.
Okay, now we get to the "final" judgment if that is what you would like to call it. And it is very straightforward. Now as a person who sucks with punctuation and really just hopes to god that Grammarly catches it and fixes it for me I would say that the punctuation and spelling for this story are really good. As for grammar which includes the previous two I think that the author does good on that and I couldn't see anything wrong so five stars.

So 13/15 stars equal up to a rating of 86% and in school that would be a low A or a high B. But this isn't school. lol. And I think that a genuine five-star overall rating is fair. I can see a young to teenage area loving this book checking it out and just reading the hell out of it. It has relatable characters, is nicely edited, can be read smoothly, and the emotion hits harder than Ali Jr. But what I think makes this book personally good to me is that it connects with me and gets me to think. I loved the overall experience of reading this story for what it has.

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Great story.

So the author is clever and the story is very good once you delve four chapters into it, very long chapters that I think could have been split up into at least two or three chapters by themselves individually. And they have a consistency to brick together dialog with the story making it look like a brick of words. Like the first two paragraphs, then it gets better to read in the third and fifth paragraphs, only to revert to the bricks in the seventh and tenth paragraphs. And I don't know if it's me but with those very long chapters and to just power through it and read it was a bore. Like I don't think I remember a spelling mistake so great for the author. The formatting is terrible for the reasons I've already mentioned. Okay and now for the story right,.. I got a lot from the first chapter, made the whole thing feel like an info dump after an info dump with every character's backstory and life. Like we as readers or just simply I as a reader don't need to know this unless there is going to be an easter egg of this info in later chapters. And in that case, let that easter egg show those characters' backstories instead of just info dumping it in the first chapter. It just slows down the story to a snore pace.

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5

So the story was good, except for the prolog everything was incredibly spelled and punctuated. And as the story goes I think that I didn't read far enough because around chapter 3 he gets a text and has to go play the role of captain save a hoe. And that is where I left. One because it didn't hook me and two wasn't my kind of story. But because of those two personal reasons, I'm not going to give fewer stars.

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Great read

Great story I would read it again. 😎👍

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Would read it

The writer is talented and I think that this story can go somewhere. So yeah 5/5

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Great

So even though I liked the characters and the setting I have to say that there was a lack of pull or hook that would make me want to continue reading. And then there's the question would I reread it? And the answer to that question is no. I wouldn't want to reread it and I think that there is no hooking bit in this story. With that said though I did read through what was there and thought this is an alright story. I would check it out of a library for sure.

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Great plot

I'm just going to let the stars explain themselves. The story was alright and I would continue to read it though.

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Great story

So I recommend just to keep writing. The story is a mystery to me because it only has been one chapter so far and there's simply not enough to judge.

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Great

Liked the story

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Anya

So the thing that I liked most about this book was the author's character Anya because the author made her feel like a real person. Now I would say a lot of authors struggle with getting their characters to have their own unique voices but Simran Kaur Malhotra didn't struggle with this. Her dialogue between characters is amazing. I could be absorbed into the story and kept there comfortably. I hope that they will continue writing as the book is only in its tenth chapter and I could have honestly continued reading.

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Great

The idea of the book was solid. I liked it.

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five

Great,... great,.. good story,.. I'll be honest and say I only read up to chapter five and saw no problems with it. I think some words were used in repetition and that the book didn't connect with me. And before someone says something like "you're a guy who only likes action fantasy" my favorite series in the whole world is WereWorld by Curtis Jobling and my favorite stand-alone is Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde. And I think that this book is good, it has werewolves, cursing, and is full of drama. But I read five chapters and it didn't stick. So give it a try and see if it's the book that you've been looking for.

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Great

au revior. The story is alright I didn't like it. But no mistakes in the writing and I'm sure someone else will like it. The Turn I don't understand the premise nor did I understand the point of the story. Couldn't get into it and so I think others can tell me that I'm wrong.

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Great

It's a powerful story about a girl who is deaf, which is a clever play on the title. I think that author did a great job writing this story and I can't wait to read more. Like I'm on chapter 8 and I just have to say it was very emotional and,.. I can't wait to read more.

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Great short story

I'll be honest and say that this story had a few elements from every genre. And that kind of made the flow not concise. Plus with it being so short I think there were just a couple of knots of the story that didn't tie well at the end. Like so many questions left to be answered and feel like the book just had more to offer. But with what is there I think it's light and easy to read to five stars for the short story.

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Weird

It was just weirdly written. Like it reminded me of a book/script for a play. Like a script for a play that was attempted to be transferred to a book adaptation. But getting cut off halfway through the transition. Like the story is not bad, kind of bland and I think could definitely be picked up on the pace, the main character pov is great but she could maybe use a boost with just her being the main character Like she as a high school student should be more dramatic and less realistic. Especially in a book. Like high school students are always pretty dramatic. And not being a troll or anything. I hope to god I'm not coming off rude. See I gave a reason why the plot was a three and why the writing style was a three. Now as for punctuation and grammar I have to tell you it chalks up to the story being weirdly formatted in the way it is. For instance, the dialog tags are what they are. Like the mention of the character, then in bold and in quotation marks is what they say. It's weird because that's not how I was taught to write,.. And if this is just how this author was taught to write dialog then I guess I'll change the rating. But if that's not the case then I'm sorry it's wrong.

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One chapter

Not much to go off. One chapter wonder. It was good but not enough to go off on. So four star? Like I'm sure the book will be a five-star but right now it's just not there to be judged.

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Amazing

I like that the author is talented and the book was free! It was cool to see and read all the characters feeling themselves and get this,.. Reading an actual good sex scene. Like I just got done reading the most horrendous sex scene and it was just like downing a whole bottle of painkillers. Terrible and pointless. But this book was just so good at the descriptions and the emotion behind it.

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spooky

Stay away from the darkness is one of the better horror novels here on inkitt that I've read so far. The characters give off the perfect vibe as you go through it.

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Great man

Just keep writing it's good.

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Great writing

Truly mean it when I say that the author did some work. But the chapters were just too long for my liking and just killed the vibe.

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Great Technique

So the author is talented to say the very least. Like she knows how to write a stutter and how to portray emotion. And I think that's very important to the story. The thing that she lacks though is writing style as she tells rather than shows. This is pointed out when her longest "chapter" is just a whole page of her describing her characters instead of just showing us what they look like. With all said and done though I would read it again. So five stars.

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Like I agree with the other review.

Like I think I agree with the other review and have nothing else to say. Like how can I put that more politely? Your story just needs work is all.

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Coolio

Relatable and amazing descriptions

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Lovely

Great chapter on the story of Jesus Christ. I think people should definitely check this story out.

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Cool

Keep writing. You don't need my opinion for such a great story. I hope it gets published one day.

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Dramatic

The genre stays true and I thought the story was worth the read. Because the character is relatable while the side character are simply that. Love the story

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Great story

The story was worth reading

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Sorry

Why is this story not captivating enough? I think I must be burnt out or something. Because I can't really find a good reason to continue reading and the story itself isn't bad. Like the spelling is great, the grammar is great, and the characters are meh,.. at least in my opinion. So a book review about this story really goes in your favor. I can only say and tell people that you're story is one to check out because maybe they'll like it. Because your character's dialog is perfect. But the narrator bit and just the huge blocks of words get straining on the eyes. Plus I think it's just not hooking enough for one to want to continue reading chapter after chapter. And listen I'm reading on a perfect gray raining Wednesday and listening to some awesome music. So the setting place and time is right. But the book itself was not hitting at all with me. Like I'm sorry for this I have to give the story a four-star review. Because the plot just didn't swing home and what is a story if not for its plot?

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Horror and romance done well

The thing I loved about this short story or novelette is that the author really made it feel like these characters within the story were real. And that the hint of mystery along with great comedic reliefs just carried me through the entire story. I for one am glad that I can put this in my archive or truly finished books. Because even though I am sad that the story was short and that I have to stop reading the story between the two lovers, I am glad to say that I read it and I think it can be something more with a little more support from the inkitt community and you as the reader to be. Why should you read this book? Because it's good, funny, creepy, and just one hell of a story to just blitz through.

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Story was amazing

Didn't see anything wrong and there for if you are reading this review to see if you would be interested in it I say I did and that you should too.

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Sorry for the long wait

So It took me two weeks to get around to reading this book and might I just say that it was terrible that I made this author wait so long to hear the feedback they deserve. The book was terrific and the main character is to die for. I love the descriptions and detail of the character's emotions.

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Good job

Didn't strike me interested but with that said good story for the right person

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Great story

Hey sorry for the lazy review but it's past midnight and I just got to the tenth chapter. Great and all and I hope the writer keeps doing their thing.

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😎👍

Great story but the blocks of text and the grammar kind of take you out of it. With that said I hope the story continues.

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Okay

So the beginning is hooking. I liked it even though it is terribly formatted and not even a little grammar editing was poured into the book I still found the experience and the character interesting. The main character is this snob who finds this married woman and is now obsessed with the idea of her rejecting him. I think it makes a good story I want more chapters and a little editing to happen and this story could be a five-star for sure.

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Great story

So,.. Great story with a few spelling mistakes. Go read the book.

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Doesn't feel like Harry Potter

So when I read fanfiction I want to feel that tone of the original still there. Like I just read some Batman fanfiction and it was like I read the comics of Batman. And so when I started reading this story I stopped on chapter one and went to read the first book of the Harry Potter series again. And once I did that I came back to this story and blitzed through the next six chapters and I will say that for not being professionally edited and being free I would say this story is a great four out of a five-star storybook. I want to see where the story goes but I think it could be a stand-alone series. The author has a lot of originally within this story that it doesn't feel or read like a Harry Potter book. Like Draco doesn't feel or read like Draco in the books. Honestly, I don't want to just drag this story through the mud because it's a clean and nice story. But with that said because it's a fan piece on the Harry Potter series it's hard to judge it. Because the original piece is out there and people have read it, liked it, and it's professionally famous. Like I think that if someone passed me this story and was like "Hey dude this story is cool. It's a fan fic of Harry Potter and I think it was cool. Read it." I would be like "Oh okay then." And then read it and put it down the first chapter I was in it. One is because of the huge info dump at the start. You don't need that. Because people only read fan fics of books that they have already read. So you didn't need that in there to provide that kind of information. Plus another thing that the author struggles with is they tell rather than show. This gets better as you read the story, she cuts that out real quick but for the first three chapters, it was a big problem. But you should read the story because the plot is a good one for what it is. Sorry that this was a long review for 7 chapters worth. But I just had a lot to say and it's all my opinion. So please don't take this to heart. And Keep writing author. And for those who are reading this as a casual reader go ahead and check it out.

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Original

So the plot is original in itself. I definitely haven't heard of a vampire story where the vampire's origin is that of a nuclear war. So that in itself is amazing. Now, this is where I start saying a few things wrong about the book so please keep in mind it's a free still ongoing story. So the first three chapters the dialogue tags were weird it was as if you were reading a screenplay instead of a novel, this gets fixed around chapter 4 and then keeps a steady pace till chapter six where it feels like the author was experimenting with their dialogue. Meaning that the characters themselves felt unconcise. Now here are some good things about the story that I liked. One of the main characters is awesome and powerful. I love reading a story where the main character is "buffed" Like she didn't have a six-pack and huge biceps but like she was strong and just had a huge moral dilemma with killing people. Perfect character 100%. Now the side characters were all meh. They were just kinda there to be a part of the story. Like they were as important as a building in a story. It's there to serve one purpose and that is to fill space. And the scenes were great, very descriptive. I think people should read this story because of its originality, and creativity, and to go along the process and help this author. I see potential in it because as I read I kept seeing improvements in the writing itself. Which kudos author!

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Grand love at it's finest

Why Can't I Be Your's is a book that any romance nut would love to pick up and read. Now I didn't like the few cliche that the story used but otherwise would say is alright.

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Yes this is what I've been wanting

I would say this is a great book. The chapters are a bit long but who doesn't like those right. I love the main character and his trusted side kick. The author did this story right

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Help help help

So where the story is great I feel like it should be a bigger story. Something like what is the MC's job previously, what did he do to be thrown in this house with a doctor and people who watch and care for him, is he rich and how, just a lot of questions and a lot of ways this story could have been addressed but instead took this route. And not saying the story was bad, In on itself the story is about a man who is dealing with loss then makes up the loss with hallucinations but then as he gets better the hallucinations stop which causes him to close up to try to see them again. I didn't finish the story but I imagine it ends with him getting help. Either way if you like mystery and warm and sad stories then check this one out

Oh and before this is all done and said there are a few messed up sentences. But nothing too bad.

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Great

It looks like someone definitely took the time to write and promote their story. Good job I bet this novel has gotten thousands of reads already. But since this is the first review that I saw I just want to say that I was here first and that I had the most fun reading this story. Now I did see a few formatting and language problems but other than that eh the story was good enough.

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read up to chapter 20

So this review will be about the first twenty chapters that I've read. That's only a 1/4 of what is written but still, I think that I can say that the story is a slow-paced romance novel with the casual drama that you would see in one of those family sitcoms. But either way great story as it has few errors and is stimulating enough to keep on reading. I'm going to finish soon!!! Good job author.

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Great ideology.

I love the world that you have made here. The pantheon that you have made and the characters interacting with this world and rules make me want to write. Thank you for the great story.

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Okay

I don't know but this book just didn't hit it with me. Like I read to chapter 5 and just didn't feel like reading more. BUT with that said it's not a bad romance story. Like it has a lot of what I think a girl would be into reading. And a few guys out there could find the male protagonist relatable.

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Naughty granny

😂 hilarious 😂

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Tv show vamps

So I read up to chapter 10. Don't know if I wanna keep reading or put it down. But the main character is relatable and fun to read about. But I feel like the story is just a remix of vampire diaries with a nice twist of the just being no sun. The grammar is a little spotty but all together not a big deal. My favorite character is Sylvester. Don't know why but I just do. People who love vampires and female protagonist should read this book.

P.s Author I'm going to let it be your decision if I keep reading or not.

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Keep on writing

The story was amazing and every possible way that I could imagine there were a few grammatical errors but that is about it. I like the very fact that Davis and and I forget his name but either way I love that their perspective all collide into one. Now as for Catherine I thought okay first of all is this all just going to end up with it all being a dream because that's pretty lame ending for a book but no the offer delivers 100% through. I suggest that anyone who loves zombies horror thriller mystery will love this book Plus it kind of reminded me of the mist from Stephen King. Which is all the better. Author keep doing great work :-).

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Robot

So the story itself is great. Definitely worth five stars. But hear me out. The dialog was bland, the emotional manipulation wasn't there and just gave the entire story a massive downgrade for me. But with that said the story itself and the descriptions of scenery is perfect. Grammar perfect. So the story for the descriptions should be read for that reason.

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Great begining

Great beginning to a story that has not yet been finished. If you want to read a new story and have interaction with the author then I suggest you hop on this one. The author is very interactive and kind to their readers. I think I never had as much fun reading a story in my life then this one. So please take up the story and begin to journey of joy.

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Fantastic

I love the story and beyond. There are no complaints that I had about the story itself. Some commas missing but that isn't a big issue. Most authors just guess where to put those buggers anyways. Lol. But this story is all that one could look forward to reading. Today was a bright day outside and reading this story out in the middle of the woods was just a whole other experience. Truly a good book indeed.

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Coolyo

Great story indeed.

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Bitter sweet

Everyone was good till the end. Like it wasn't bad but it wasn't good either. Just didn't satisfy much. Either way though the road up towards the ending was amazing.

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Good job

Hey I know I came late to the party but the book is amazing. No errors and just every description puts a movie inside your head. Good job author.

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wish list

So I read the entire thing and left my comments where I did. And I think there are a few things I wish were different about the book. Like it's okay to do it in your own way. But I've read things like "I'm not a serial killer" by Brandon Sanderson and other things like infographics on youtube about serial killers, and just done a lot of research on the fantastic area of serial killings. And this book, this diary of a serial killer. It didn't feel at all like it was from that perspective. I got normal teen feelings. The plot I guess was this person discovering that they are not empathetic. But that's about it. The author doesn't space their paragraphs and some of the spelling and formatting were off. I didn't like that the whole vibe was confusing and complex to think about. Like, am I the narrator reading out of the diary, or are we witnessing the person who is not described writing in the diary. Who is reading it and why are they taking an interest in this diary. Who is reading it? Can any description of the town, people, the writer, anything be included? Like so in chapter 4 a story bomb was dropped that his own mom had been in a comma. Not chapter one. but chapter four. And the whole experience is just meh. I hate to sound like an asshole. I think that if the story was a little tweaked I would've enjoyed it more. I was heavily debating what to rank this story. Because off of first reading the story I would've given it a two or even a one-star rating. But reading it a second time I think I might have been too harsh. Because there is a plot and some thick writing going on. It wasn't just one chapter a no story. There is a story going on but it's hard to puzzle together. As the protagonist, the supposed serial killer to be is describing mordant events and things. Going into deep thoughts about their life and what the meaning of it is. And right now in chapter 9, you could say that they are about to murder someone. I don't know who. I don't know who would be the target. I have a guess but that is loose af. So I think that it is fair that a story with little to no editing, poorly formatted, and has a confusing writing style and plot, is worth three stars at most.

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3

Three chapters and everything was great. I gave the plot the rating it has because there just isn't a lot of plot to judge right now. I can kinda see the arc that the author is going for but it's just not too certain. Either way, check out the story I think it gets updated regularly and that means all sorts of interactions with the author. That's good.

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Scarry indeed.

I thought the story was interesting, to say the least. Because it was scary because of what happened that it was realistic in some ways. Like all stories but it just had a very underlying scary bit.

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Not expected

So you look at the cover and think, " Oh, this is going to be a cutesy story about the trifles of parenthood." But nope the summary already ruins that with three f-bombs like crazy. That honestly kind of made me laugh a bit. Because people always say don't judge a book by its cover. And I think that's absurd. Because that's precisely why we have covers on books. Lol. But this cover just ultimately tricked my mind. And when I read the story itself right now it's at one chapter but I honestly think I could have read more if presented. This is why I gave the rating a two. Because there wasn't a plot that I could judge really. But the cover made me think, and then the story being perfectly formatted and edited it looks like I would have to say where are the other chapters? Because I think I want more and if you read it you'll be on my side on this. The author is talented and the story itself is action-packed and I think just the right amount of fucked up and lovely.

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Great amongst fantasy

Clever and beautiful story.

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Didn't feel it

Now I wasn't into this book all that much. But by all means, that doesn't make it a terrible story. In fact, it's one of the better ones here on inkitt. But I think it was just that I was tired or something but the book didn't hook its talons into me. Now I think you should read this book because the characters are relatable, the story could be a good one on paper and you'll be enveloped in the author's fantastic world.

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More chapters

You can't rate a plot without seeing it. But I love the characters and the way that the author inputs emotion into their dialog is just so realistic. And as far as grammar and things go It was perfect. I request more chapters because I want to more about what the story has to offer.

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Weird mix

So when I saw that this was a horror romance I thought owe it was just going to be another case of Stockholm syndrome but make it more fucked up. But,.. well it is sorta like like that but it was an interesting read that made me turn every page and even re-read it like it was a drug. Loved the story and I can't wait to read more of it. Thank you author for coming out with this story.

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good good good

So fantasy and romance. Not a lot of good ones written out there. For example, this is just my opinion but at least this book wasn't the twilight series. Didn't like those books but The Host on the other hand. Now that was a good sci-fi/romance. Either way, this book did its job and I kind of want to read it a second. Either way good read you should check it out. Chow.

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Nice

So I liked it. I don't I saw or noticed anything I didn't like. And with that said I will say that without a doubt that your book has made it to my top ten. Thank you for your patience and brilliant and creative mind.

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4-star

As an author, reader, reviewer, journalist, and many other titles that say I know what writing is all about. I will say that the story had me moved but the ending for me was unacceptable. Not because it doesn't make sense but because it didn't pack emotion for me. Everything was formatted just made it feel as if the author of this story just tried to make it look longer than it was. Not saying that's a problem that affects the story. But this type of "writing style" just doesn't feel right to me. With that said though I love the story

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hear me out

The emojis were misleading as hell. I mean when I see emojis used in the titles I was thinking, "This can't be series right? Because this just makes the chapter look silly." And I think that's still right. Now with that said the writing style is creepy sure but did it make me feel that something was going to crash down on me scary? Not so a scary short story that isn't that scary in my opinion. So plot and writing style takes a crash for me. But punctuation was perfect and the overall arcs of all of the stories were worth a read. And I think you should read them and tell me that I was wrong. Maybe I'm just desensitized from horror. Lol. But I hope the author continues writing. Sorry if this sounds toxic.

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laughed my ass off

So I liked the story. I think because it's a humor and a romance it compliments one another when those awkward moments happened. I was told to be quiet from how much I was just rolling on the floor gaining a six-pack. Lol.

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First review lol

Um just to make sure that the author doesn't feel discredited here I read this over maybe a week and a half. Damn sorry for that. The book was worth the time though in my opinion. Because out of all the books that had to review this week (11 of them) I think the one that was the most deserving of a five star review was this one. Because the grammar is amazing, didn't see a single thing wrong. If I looked closer, I might have, but I was just too invested in the world and its main characters. Now the side characters didn't really put in their little bit of the story but I'm one of those people that like the main characters and think that their sole purpose is to be in the spotlight of the book. So that bit doesn't matter. The writing style is elegant and easy to understand. Loved it to the beginning and end. I put it in my private reading lists to continue reading as the book updates. Can't wait to see more chapters.

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Truly a scary thought

So I didn't see anything wrong with the story and I had a creepy sensation that someone was watching me and that my room was shrinking while reading the story. Wonderfully scary and I think the author did a good job of writing this story. Kudos.

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Kinky

So erotica is a very hard genre to review. Because personally I just don't know what to say. Like the sex scenes were good. But coming from a guy's perspective it just made it feel cringy a little. Because some of the lines were cheesy and I had my brother walk in and read over my shoulder. We both turned to each other and laughed our butts off. Not because the writing was poor but because it was cheesy for kinky erotica. So I and my brother talked about the book and we came up with many reasons for what the rating should be. I argued four stars because there were a couple of spelling mistakes and when I imagine erotica I want to feel sort of ashamed type feeling for reading it. But it just made me laugh and want to keep reading to keep laughing. But my brother liked the story and agreed with me on the grammar and the plot. But said the writing style and that the overall rating should be five. So this will be my last note on the book itself. It's a definite four to five-star book for anyone to read.

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Success

I can see this book going places. But with that said I, in my opinion, didn't find myself hooked on the book. But since this was a review swap I had to keep my side of the deal and I don't regret it. And I did in fact read the book. And here's what I liked. The descriptions of the places are amazing. I can nearly picture them inside my head and being there. It was so good. Okay, but the dialog and the title were that got me. Because I'm a very opinionated person right. And when I saw the title "Never Kiss Your Boyfriend" I was thinking like, why not? Aint that your boyfriend? it just presented me with a pov that was weird to me that made me think of the title more than the actual book. It might just be my brain so,.. I don't hold that against the author. But the dialog just felt a little more robotic than human. And that's my only complaint really. Sorry for the long rant. I truly enjoyed the bits and pieces that I read and enjoyed.

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Four star success

Now I don't say this with malice or anything. I liked the story but it was less than ideal for me. So the grammar is not perfect but again it's noticeable and it gets hard to read during some sections. With that said that kind of brought it all down one star.

Okay, negativity is out of the way. now. I loved your main character. I can't wait to read the second book when it comes around. Or maybe it's already released and you shout post it on my wall. But either way great story I could read it again.

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Loved it

I liked the characters and the world-building. It's very well crafted and would recommend it to others.

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😎👍📝

The story was amazing. Well one of the two stories I liked. The sessions story was just epic to read. I would 100% recommend it to others

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♥ ♥ ❤

Loved it. Simple as that. The story was intense and it made me was to keep reading it. Even though it is my least liked genre I would say that I've read other romance stories and say that out of most of them I would read this one more.

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Awesome

Now, this is a book that a guy can get pumped to read. I loved it from the front to the back. I can't wait for more chapters. Please keep writing your obviously good at it so I can't wait to read more. I've added it to my list to continue. Just promise to keep writing!!!

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What have you done to get this 5 star review?

I loved it and I want more chapters to read. It was just an amazing world and characters that I could relate to and put myself in. Both scary and thrilling the story deserves more than the usual 4-star reviews that it has been getting.

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Red Moon Rising.

I liked the book as far as it has been written. Mistakes that I could ignore so the grammar wasn't a problem. The story is original and creative. I loved reading the story and I can't wait to read more. every chapter keeps you wanting to read more. Some of the best cliffhangers that I have seen.

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Good

The story is really good.

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Loved the story

It was creative, exciting, motivational, and just all-around a great read. I recommend this to any reader wanting to sit down and dedicate their time to reading this great novel.

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The Villain

So when it comes to bundles of short stories I pick and select the stories that I want to read. So I read the Abomination and Villain. Out of those two, I thought The villain was one of the better ones. Now the dialog is a little messed up I couldn't understand who was talking and just had to guess that it was a crowd of people or some sort. But liked the two stories I read and I'm sure that there are more that people here on this app will love. I recommend this to someone who truly wants to sit down for a couple minutes and read.

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Wow

Imagine ww2 but,.. nevermind it's just as sad as that. Reading this book was great. Would 100% Recommend.

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👍

The plot of the story is very engaging. I couldn't stop reading once I began. I loved all the chapters so far. Looking forward to the next chapter. A great book with great potential! I think this author is going places.

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The Thief With A Silver Tongue and Pretty But Punchable Face

Delightful story. A pretty thief that faces challenges and is forced to decide whether to take on a dangerous job with dangerous people or just chill and relax. But Nah fuck that he's going to do the job of course. I love the character. The dialogue and the humor are also great. Can't wait to see what happens next. Great job author.

I think that anyone who loves thieves' stories or stories with thieves in them than check out this story.

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100%

I liked and read it as far as the book would allow me to. Like I loved every bit and detail. The Hidden Moon is a great read and an amazing time waster. Loved it.

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The Dream

Loved the book front to back. I can't wait for it to be updated and more chapters to appear. The book reminds me a lot of my favorite author's styles of writing so that was a bonus. Now the plot was great I think anyone should read it solely for the plot of the book. To the author, you made one of the best fantasies on here. I hope you publish this on a bigger site or company because I can see this going far.

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Wolf!!!

So my first thought was like "So his name is actually wolf?" Okay, that's fine let's dive in. So the character wolf is both primitive and witty. Which makes sense. I think that character is great and that one should read this story alone for this character. Puts a new perspective against every other main character nowadays.

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Like it.

The man saved us the plot of the battle of lovers and the whole I can't marry a commoner trope. Love it just because of that. Didn't have to waste time and just went into the juicy meat of it all. Good job!!!

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Sins

So I like the premise of the story. The seven deadly sins but better. Instead of literal personifaction their just spirits that one guy can control. And the ironic thing is that anger was the most accepting of all of the sins. Loved the story and am going to continue to read it.

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G()()D Chapter

Didn't see anything wrong with the writing of the story. I thought the plot was good and the characters are well written. The author has talent and I can see this story going places. Good job!!!

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👍 Great job

So I liked it for the most part. See I'm not that mean of a person so I'll keep this bit of constructive criticism short. Show more than tell it. I think that was really the only problem. With the story. The plot and the character arcs are a little wacky but I think that's just me. I saw one comment about it but again I don't think that's necessarily wrong. Um, but in truth, I don't think the book is worth three or four stars. Especially since it's at the beginning of its creation. If you want a book to read in your spare time then you should pick this one up. I don't think it'll kill you to spare a couple of minutes and see if I'm full of shit or not. This is one of the better books on inkitt.

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Emoji spam here

Either way, you look at this story I would say without a doubt that I liked reading it. Now the beginning just goes full throttle and reveals the plot but that doesn't matter. Because the bulk of the story so far hasn't been written. So it's not really fair for me to say this. The book Eye Contact is amazing and I would recommend it to others.

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Good Book

Sorry for taking so long to review this book. But it was worth every second of it when I finally got to it. I will recommend this to everyone on my Twitter account.

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Thumbs up

I liked everything from the wording to the plot. The character arc is not done yet but I can't wait for more chapters to be uploaded. Keep it up author

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It's amazing!!!

So I'm not one into romance. I think it's corny and kind of predictable for the most bit. But this story is amazing. The plot feels original and the romance and erotic bits that are in it are overdone. I think this is an amazing story that all those who are over 18 should read.

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Poem to story

I liked it. But I think that what's going to happen with this story is that most people come to inkitt to read stories and seeing a book that is a story but formatted as a poem is a little off-putting. But with that said I enjoyed it. So to readers, I think you should totally read this story.

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Great story 😎

I liked it. What more do you need to read a story? This one is just as good as any other.

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The Story Is Good!!!

So I'm not a grammar shark by any means. Like, look at my 60+ reviews. None of them were about spelling, punctuation, or grammar. And so I say this book needs editing because the capitalization is ass. Plus the enter bar was not pressed enough to give the story space to breathe. Okay, that's enough ragging on that. Because the story was amazing. The four-star review I believe is fair because I truly loved the characters and the romance and truly I think that if I was going to read a romance I would want to read one written this way by this author. Like for only 6 chapters so far in the story I like your idea of just blasting through it edit later types of vibes. Because I'm a fair bit of the same but I run my rough drafts through Grammarly and a quick skim of proofreading. Anyhow for the chapter so far I want to see more. I think there still is a lot of potential in the story.

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it's great

it's great. Like I didn't go into it thinking that it was poetry so I thought it was messed up and that the author didn't know what she was doing. But reading the other reviews I went through it a second time and it was a more pleasant thing to read. But I don't know. It's just not for me I guess. Still, I'm not going to give this person a bad review because of my tastes. It was a good book overall and there were very few to no mistakes that I could spot. Good job author and kudos when it gets published or whatever your goal is with this book. Sorry if this sounds rude.

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Thumbs up on the writing portion

I have not come across such polished writing skills on this app, Really appreciate the way the author wrote his characters, background, and even the plot was awesome and easy to follow. I also think that the two main characters in the story description could have been more described but the emotion and character were great.

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Long and worth it

So I began reading this in April and I was lucky enough to have the best weather to read a book (Gray and raining) so I just sat on my couch and read through this like it was candy. Just one chapter after another it was taken in. The author is amazing at third person pov plus the book was a mixture of comedy and a few pieces here and there that made me stand up pumped as if I was going to fight a dragon. It was really a good story through and through,

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Oh My God

So good of a story to read. Just absolutely FABULOUS!!!

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Fantastic!!!

So the plot was great don't get me wrong. I think it's one of the better bible/fantasy/horror/Sci-Fi that I've read. And for any out there that are wanting to read this, I suggest you should, especially if you like stories related to the bible or the ideology of the devil in stories. Either way, this was a fantastic read and I hope it continues.

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A cliché done perfectly.

I've read so many books similar to hers on inkitt so it was predictable and kind of a slow read with the novel being still in the making and somewhat short. This is around its 8th chapter at the time of this review. But the writing style gets you immersed and has little to no spelling errors. That's great. The reason for the two-star in the plot is not because it sucked or anything. It just didn't feel original and you could get the same feeling reading any other romance. And it just doesn't seem fair to lower the overall story because of a somewhat unoriginal plotline. Now would I read again? Sure. The book was a good book for romance. Had all the cheesy tropes and the erotica bit was fun to read sure. Not saying the book itself sucked. That's not my point at all. I think the plot was just unoriginal and predictable. Well structured and the plot didn't leave any questions. Like many other romances. So yeah three on plot and four overall.

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Nothing Bad About This Book

Ethan is a character that is highly relatable that gets pushed into moral dilemma after moral dilemma. It's nice to read because one like me who doesn't read a lot of dystopian novels, I've read Red Rising, Fahrenheit 451, Hunger Games, and a few others and I would have to say that I put this book at least top three among them. It's creative, immersive, and just epic to read. Enough said about it really. You should be reading instead of this review. Like, come on. Lol.

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Love it to the stars and back

"i'll do anthing in my power to make the war games in three days or less." I don't agree with this. And trust me I've written plenty of tournament arcs and I think going down this kind of route is just not realistic or acceptable to most readers. If anything since training is involved and we're talking about immortal beings that half a year minimum and even that is cutting it a little short. Plus Altair is learning everything so soon and the story feels like your trying to push it towards its ending. But you could totally flesh this out and make it have a more emotional connection with all of your characters. I fill like there's a chunk missing in this story and you have all the keys to make it perfect. Like I demand more chapters because it's a good story but like all good stories it takes time. And for such a grand and vast idea like this one you could most definitely flesh it out. For instance Altair's familiarity with the ax, Proxima's world, and her relationships with these other gods, Even throw in some twists on why some of the gods truly want the humans to die, and maybe go into detail about why only humans are getting deleted and not other beings like dwarfs. Oh and plus by giving Altair and Proxima time to train and go on this miny adventure you can show your readers what value Altair's home and family have to compare with one another. This was going to be a comment but I'm going to use it as a review. So that this book can have the five-star review it deserves. I hope the author of such an amazing story is willing to talk to me about it.

But now for you readers. This story is amazing. The writing style is different then any other story you'll read. Because it's like reading a screenplay. But that only enhances the cinematic feeling of the book as you get immersed in it. The characters are amazing and creative. Altair is a relatable character with some mystery behind him. I loved it, to say the least, and you should totally check it out and help me demand for more chapters to be released.

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Oh my god/devil

Like it from the beginning to the end. Can't say more about it than that. The characters are awesome, the dialogue is great, and the formatting is just awesome. You should definitely read this book.

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Loved it 😎

I don't know what to say. I've written over 50 reviews about nearly every genre here on inkitt. But always am surprised to find a book that tops another one. Like this book it's amazing and thrill riding. I could read it over and over again and not be tired of it.

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Great Story

I loved it and you should read and review this story too!!!

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Scary Indeed

I would be the one to say scarier than any Stephen King novel out there. Like coming from a household where Cujo and the Dark Tower series were worshiped more than any of my own successes I can say without a doubt that I would read this 9/10 times. Little errors there and there but I'm sure that you a normal reader won't spot them so I won't point them out. The plot is really good and was easy to follow. Plus the descriptions themselves should be read. In other words, I recommend this without another thought.

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Funny

Note to author: I'll change this or delete it if you want, seeing as I know you'll see this first before anyone else.

The story for it being chapter-long I can't really comment on. Like it was funny but I would like to read more to get into the meat of it. Because I'm one of those people that strongly believe that it takes five chapters of a book to actually be hooked into it. So does this book intrigues me? The answer is no. Plus it's still looking to be in the editing phase which is not a problem. I think one could easily read this and ignore the not-so-subtle mistakes and still find the humor within it.

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Rad as hell

I read this multiple times and still doesn't get old. The plot was perfect, the writing style was immersive, and there were little to no mistakes in spelling or grammar. It was a perfect story and I think that anyone can get into it. So if you are a reader and you just want to sit on your couch for a couple of hours then I suggest highly that you read this book.

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Cool Story 😎

It was a good story that kept me jumping out of my seat. I know I said that saying wrong but the story is really good in my opinion.

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Eleven chapters and a few unnecessary things

So the eleven chapters that I read I can say that it was an amazing fantasy book. It has action and a great plot. But my problem is the first three chapters. I'm talking about the Character Descriptions, The Table of Contents, and the Disclaimer. One you don't need the Table of Contents. When your reading there's a tab where the reader can see all the chapters and their titles. So it was unnecessary. Character descriptions are also unnecessary because they should just be woven into the story not put on the side. And disclaimer. So many authors are worried about other people stealing their work. But no one shouldn't worry about this.
Okay, the rant is done with. But now onto the story. It was amazing without a doubt I would see this on the shelf of a library and check it out and read it a couple of times.

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Holy grail good

I liked the action and the emotion that is very well played in the story. If you like wolves and loves stories and arena gladiator fights or illegal dog fighting rings (https:petmydogorelse.com) then this is the book for you. And to the author, I hope you continue writing the story. I would hate to see a book disappear in history because of a lack of confidence and not a lack of skill.

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Fast paced but good

The book emmidtaly hooked me into the world or the "white room" and then kept me there. It was both creepy and satisfying to read. Like the character is trapped and it gives off the vibes that he's being constantly watched. It was a fun read and I say that without a doubt I can't wait to read more of it when it comes out.

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Wasn't my cup of tea

The story wasn't what I would typically read and so I was bored the entire time reading the story. But with that said I do believe that everyone else the adores the genre would love it. So 100% read it if you like the genre.

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Murder On My Mind

So I like this book because the entire time I was thinking "Just kill the teacher". Pause. Like the kids are suffering and getting killed by these evil teachers. Either way that's not the biggest part of the book. See these two main characters are trying to escape and are frightened out of their minds and I can't blame them. But with that said I was like, "Stab their knees or something!" The entire time. I was entertained and I'm sure that if you read this review you will be entertained as well.

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Great Dynamic Duo

For the story itself, I like what is going on but since this is the first erotica that I've ever read I have to say that it's not what I thought erotica would be. Like I thought fifty shades of gray dirty where the whole story was about sex. But this one has a plot to it and I find it interesting and pulled me in.

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Trigger warning please

I will be honest. I was pissed off reading the book. Because of the main characters and how they act. The author is a genius in how she manipulates scenes to make the most effective of emotional damage. The story in general is depressing and overall just heart tearing, tear-jerking, a lip-biting bit of a book. I can't give it lower stars because the writing style is amazing it made me feel emotions and into the story. The plot isn't like your normal thriller and makes you want to continue reading. There weren't any grammar or spelling mistakes that I've seen. And so the overall story is a five star and up. But the reason why I'm pissed off with the story is that Sarah is so greedy and emotionally selfish while Ayaan is ignorant and just as emotionally selfish. Either way, great story would recommend to others for sure.

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Lax AF for a horror

So when I was reading I thought since the genre was horror there was going to be a slow beginning that grows into creepy to gory horror. But instead, I just feel meh through the entire thing. Especially at the end where you're making the mc just run. Like, focusing on the breath or the fact of why she's running. Go into deep details of the character's physical descriptions. But everything else about your book is alright. The plot is not good but like writing style is great and grammar and all that are pretty good with like a couple of mistakes. With that said to keep writing you are obviously a very smart person so I bet if you just work on this book a bit more it'll be the scariest novel here on inkitt.

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Thumbs up

So I'm not the one that likes these types of stories. I was bored and just felt like wow and really that's happening throughout the thing. Like the marriage bit. That was strange to have it so early in the story I thought that it was going to happen a little later down the line as most stories do it. But this really only means that the author is original in ideas. And personally, I don't think I could properly leave anything but a five-star review. See if this was a fantasy or action I could say something about it. But because this genre is a little out of my element all I could say was that the story had little to no spelling mistakes and it was fluid for the most part.

Oh, and to the author, I appreciate the story and how interactive you are with your readers. Thank you for letting me read this.

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Great

So reading the story there were ups and downs. For instance, I liked it. But there is a thing called too much drama. Now don't get me wrong I write stories here too and I know that having drama to a story especially a whole string of drama can captivate and hook the reader to continue reading. Now this story does that. It keeps you wanting to read more and find the bottom of this whole cobweb of drama. But with that said I felt it was a tad bit of a hair too much. Either way, I give this story ten out of ten. Like no mistakes in grammar and spelling that I saw from a first glance. The plot was nicely paced and the author's writing style was easy to understand and full of emotion. I loved it.

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Anger

The anger that is portrayed by the main character was sad with a dash of oh shit anger. The best emotion portrayed so far was chapter one. The second chapter could have used more detail but either way still a good read and a good couple of chapters.

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Damn!!!

I read many stories before. And I can say that this had made my top twenty in books that I like to read. I want more already. Keep up the good work author and for you the reader please check this story out you won't regret it.

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Intense as F#*k

One moment the book can be calm and sad to intense to crippling depression. The last chapter (which was chapter 7 when I read this story) was just filled with sadness and intensity. I was genuinely worried about the main characters while I was reading this story. The author has a way of making you feel what the characters or feeling and allowing you to peek into their world. It was an amazing read.

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Longer and better

I can't wait for you to post more chapters. This is a well-thought-out plot of a story. It was interesting and always kept me guessing. This is so good considering that books nowadays always seem to be the same stuff about the same things. This was a nice twist of originality.

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So good for just a sample

Since the story was a sample I'm glad I got a free glimpse of this story. And from what I read here I would recommend that you the reader should go and buy the full thing on Kindell and on any and every single other platform that this book is on. It deserves that much at least.
And for the writer, you're a genius. I'm a beginning author that just published his first story and I can see that this book will be worth every penny.

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Adorable

The character Mary is funny, smart, and just cute when it comes to love interests in the story. I read up to chapter 20 and could say without a doubt that I am going to continue reading it. It's a comfortable read that doesn't lunge out at you and pull you in. It's more of a relaxing chill in the sun type of book. Not too dramatic nor too lovey dovey. The book was just perfect for me to read and would 100% recommend it to others.

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Next Stephen King

This book is creepy and for horror, it's doing its job. As more chapters update the more this story will unfold. It's interesting, to say the least. And to say the most would be to say that the author's writing style is out of this world. It's creative and hooking.

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A year of just typing and uploading

So I know that it looks petty to write a review for your own book. Because let me be honest, I'm more biased than most people. Especially when it comes to this mess of a book. Well, I think that it's funny and impressive. See I'm a published author that has sold over a thousand books with little to no effort. And I'm here on inkitt just to write for fun. So "The Useless Villain" came to me in a dream and I thought "do you know what would be fun?" Let's upload three chapters every Sunday for a year and see how things go. I'm not going to edit past google editing until the story is done. I know that sounds terrible. And well it is. See because the story is going from mind to screen, so no planning and editing is involved in the process. Still, I like to think that even without that stuff I'm having fun writing the story and that you the reader are having a good time too, If not then damn. You can read it in a year when I get a professional editor to look over the entire thing. Either way, I appreciate the feedback, the constructive criticism, or just the downright insults. Because it shows me as a writer where I need to improve. Thank you all ❤ I hope you all love the story as much as I loved writing it.
And if you have any questions don't be afraid to ask them in the comments. ☺

But to those who really want an action-packed comedy mixed with romance, villains, twists, and an amazing character arc, Then don't be afraid, Come and read this story.

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I like it but it's short

See I would love to give a lot of praise for the novel. But seeing as it's only one chapter I can't go off on anything that stood out. Like it began we were introduced to two characters that seem to be just regular teenagers. Then the author changed it and even though it was better indeed. Put more witches involved but still, the concrete fact is that it's only the beginning. And I like it and I want to see it grow. And as for other people the person reading this. I think you should read it and then watch it grow.

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Bad Ass Book

It reminded me a lot of The Wheel of Time in the way that the combat goes and the descriptions. The world is vibrant and beautiful. And with the characters being well badass and just so cool and haveing interesting dialogue between all of the characters made this an easy book to blast through.

And to the author. Thank you for the read. It was a fantastic time!

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Really good!!!

Oh, it was a good horror story. The info-dumping and the depressing character is a downside a little bit. But overall I think if you want a story to read in the dark to give you chills check out this story! But overall there were no spelling or grammar errors that I could see so that's perfect. Then the plot of the story is yet to reveal itself. Like I don't know what the end goal is and I don't know if the whole plot is just Emily surviving a hell hole of a hospital or something greater yet. Either way, it would be a great investment to check out this story!

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Cool

The beginning was everything that you could want except for action. Like no action in the entire story. And I was expecting at least a little action from the father. But I'll be honest. Um, I was very bored reading everything after chapter 12. I thought since he was going somewhere where super humans would be that powers and stuff would be more apparent. But that wasn't the case and it was the downfall for me. It was hard getting into a book where no action existed. I loved the first 12 chapters with a passion. And if you like a slice of life mixed with fantasy aspects the go-ahead this story is for you. But for me, I didn't like a few things. The spelling and grammar were off. Just a tad nothing to get your panties in a wad. So that wasn't a big part of it. What I didn't like was that the main character was bland and expressionless. And that kinda killed it for me. And the plot for the first twenty chapters should have been cut off and began at chapter 14 or should have kept going with the slice of life aspect at home with his family. I give this a four-star because personally I didn't like it but there is no real reason just to give it fewer stars. So to the writer, your book is worth five to the right person. I'm just not that person. I hope you continue writing. It was a fun experience reading your book.!

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YA book that is dark and badass

This story reminded me a lot of my writing. It was informational and provided good dialogue. There were the tinyest of spelling and punctuation errors. But that shouldn't discredit a book. The story was intriguing and the character is highly relatable. I read it and commented through the entire thing. And it was interesting and at times a bit confusing. But I will keep reading it as more chapters come out. Because seeing this story progress will be worth it. So YOU should pick it up and begin reading it yourself. It's fantastic read for those who are looking for dark fantasy.

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Real and relatable

The most realistic character that you could imagine. It was funny, sad, and tragic all mixed into a character. I loved it and couldn't stop reading it once I had it up on my phone. Just a couple swipes and I was done with it. Now I can't wait but to read more.

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Demonic Douglas

This one was great with very few mistakes so far. Can't wait to type more of it

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The gourmet gladiator

I think that is a good book and from a author's perspective I think that I am gradually loving to write it. And I think others will love to read it just as much.

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Wolf erotica

I personally didn't like the story. I don't like much erotica but with that said when an erotica is done right I love it. And this piece just doesn't make me feel anything at all. I was bored half way through it. Like the beginning was cool. It then right away around chapter 4 it just wasn't slapping. The dialogue tags are off, the grammar is not that big of a problem, my main problem was the formatting of it all. Either way I see other giving this book very well praise so maybe I'm being a hard ass here and I apologize in advance. But the story is three stars because it didn't obtain my interest, the formatting wasn't good and could use improvement, plus the main character just didn't feel like she had her own voice.

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Good story

There good story for what I read. Don't know what to say. It's one chapter

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Hm? Alright

So when I saw the title Ms.Gatsby I thought it was going to be a gender bender on The Great Gatsby. But it wasn't and that was slightly disappointing tbh. But with that said nothing was wrong with the story when it comes to grammar. The first chapter of the story didn't really hook me into wanting to read more chapters. But since there is only one chapter so far I would be willing to read more just to see if my expectations are beaten. Either way good job author.

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Maybe 3 star

Terrible sex scenes, good plot but kept constantly getting interrupted by typos, good story but just has too many downfalls. Like the author is creative and I'm sure is a good person. But clearly lacks experience and has a limited vocabulary. And that effects the story a tad. Like I would pick this up in a library right? Read the synopsis and then totally dive into it. And I'm thinking it's 100% edited in this analogy. So even if it was edited and looked over and approved I just would drop it when I read the first sex scene and then if I'm stubborn I would drop it again once I saw that the author left a note trying to tell me the reader the definition of a plane. Like I just don't like the inconsistency and the very limited range of words there are. I've read up to chapter ten and thought that I should stop then. So to the author I tried to read your book and I gave it a good go. But at the end of the day I couldn't read more. Sorry.

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