Onyx_Quill

An aspiring author with a love for words, stories, and anything fictional. Note: I don't read or review anything rated 18+.

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Thrilling and Captivating

There's not that much to go off of so far, but from what I've seen, this story definitely has potential. The plot is intriguing, and the protagonist seems unique and likable, with captivating struggles.

At times, the writing felt a but muddled. I'd suggest clarifying what's actually happening in the scene in chapter one. Also (this is really just a suggestion), you might want to edit the prologue or the summary, so they're not the same. Them being identical lessened the tension a bit for me.

A great start! I'd definitely be interested in following this story.

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The Arrangement

Looks good so far! I love the entire bright, sort of cheerful feeling this story has (or at least that's what I felt while reading it). The grammar is actually very good - I didn't find any mistakes while reading. The plot itself looks promising. I think that the writing itself could use a bit more expansion, especially with emotions and setting, but otherwise, there's not much else to suggest. Keep up the good work!

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Gangsta

This looks promising! The plot and overall idea are unique and fresh. Ruby, the protagonist, is full of personality - same with the side characters. I'm very interested to see how the plot plays out.
As far as critique and suggestions go, I would have liked the characters and plot to have been introduced a bit more naturally. Maybe try to use the "show, don't tell" method? Also, it would have been interesting to learn about the world this story takes place in - however, with it being so early in the story, this issue will probably fix itself as the plot goes on..
Lots of potential! I'm very curious to see what happens next.

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The Book of Trials

A wonderfully written book, with a thrilling plot and a great protagonist. The writing is amazing, giving readers a clear image of the settings and characters. I personally loved the protagonist, Veia - she's relatable, full of personality, and carries a sense of depth that grabbed my attention from chapter one. I really enjoyed this, and can’t wait to see more from this author!

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Suspenseful and Intriguing

I really enjoyed this! The sense of suspense and mystery kept me hooked with every new story. As far as critique goes, I noticed a few grammar mistakes, and thought that writing could be a bit more fleshed out. Some of the scenes and explanations felt a bit vague, but that also added a sense of mystery to them, so it's perfectly fine. All in all, some really great short stories, filled with horror and suspense.

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Captivating

I love the slow-building plot and mystery in this novel. The plot is intriguing and very unique. The characters are all relatable, with distinct, likeable personalities. I love how the plot slowly builds, dropping hints of what’s to come and creating a sense of suspense as the book goes on. As for the writing itself, it was very detailed and clear.
As for suggestions, I felt that it might be a good idea to use the "show, don't tell" method for some of the backstory, settings, and details (mainly in the first portion of the novel). I also felt that there could have been a bit more emotion in the narrative. Nevertheless, I enjoyed reading this! I'm curious to see what happens next.

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Girl In Pain

I love the raw emotion in this book. The plot and the characters are believable, with a great sense of conflict to them all (especially the protagonist). I personally love the author's writing style; it's beautiful and descriptive, reading almost like poetry. The entire story is full of emotion, and the mystery surrounding the protagonist's past is very compelling.
Definitely worth a read!

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Gripping!

This book had me at the edge of my seat. It was thrilling and mysterious, giving readers little pieces of information and slowly drawing them in. I was hooked from the first sentence. At this point, I think the only issue is the grammar and frequent typos, which sort of distracted from the story. However, the writing itself was very good, and the book as a whole was fascinating and exciting.
Keep up the good work!

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Very promising!

So far, this book is great. I particularly like the struggles of the individual characters. The entire cast, including side characters, are filled with personality and charm. I also love how the plot slowly unfolds with an overall sense of mystery.

It seemed to me that the main characters often acted a bit too mature for their ages - maybe you could make them a tad older? It's not a huge issue, just something I noticed.

Just a quick suggestion: You might want to put a trigger/content warning in your summary, regarding the events of chapter 4 - some people might find that kind of thing upsetting.

Great work! I'm excited to see what comes next.

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A Tense and Exciting Short Story

This is an amazing short story, Tension is held until the final sentence as readers slowly learn the plot. The author gave enough information to guide readers in the right direction while leaving some things to the imagination. I’m amazed at how there managed to be actual character development in such a short piece. The woman's inner turmoil about her actions is particularly well done.

All in all, this is a great story with amazing writing, intriguing characters, and a gasp-worthy ending.

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