Friend Zone

RIVER POV

The salad crunched as she bit into her sandwich, it sounded fresh and crisp. I couldn’t pull my eyes away from her lips as she slowly swiped away crumbs with her finger.

“Are you listening to me River?” I blinked, realising I had been staring at her in a haze.

“What?” I asked forcing myself to look at her directly in the eyes.

She grunted in frustration, “you never listen to me.”

Shit, she was right.

I zone out, a lot.

“Yeah well,” I answered casually, “you bore me.”

She dropped the bread down on the plate and I could smell the waft of sweet chilli sauce that drenched the chicken pieces.

My stomach hurt.

The gnawing emptiness that echoed in the pit of my belly was too much to handle.

I couldn’t remember my last meal.

Sure, I managed to steal bits of food here and there but a full, hot meal? Nada.

The lack of sustenance was making me disoriented and weak. I needed food.

I wanted to grab her fucking sandwich and consume every last bite right in front of her. I wanted to fill the vexing, jagged void that was my insane starvation.

Fuck, I just wanted to buy my own.

I lifted my gaze to the food counter, people just walked up there, looked at the menu board, ordered whatever they wanted and paid. Simple.

They didn’t realise the luxury of money or even notice their wallets thinning because they purchased a meal.

“River!” She yelled, diverting my attention away from the food and back onto her. “You’re not listening to me again!”

Monique raised the sandwich to her lips and as she took another bite her throat made an appreciative ‘mmm’ sound, directly taunting me.

“We’re done here.” I stood up, instantly feeling lightheaded but I grabbed the table to prevent myself from fainting.

“What do you mean?” She whined.

“Are you simple? I said we’re done.”

In storming off, I crashed into a waitress because everything was black and I couldn’t see where I was going, but what instantly penetrated through my senses was the aroma of food that landed all over my shirt.

The smell made my insides scream in pain. My stomach tightened and wrenched at how godly it smelt. I could almost taste it and yet, it was still so far out of my reach to actually eat.

This was like some form of cruel torture.

Food, placed directly under my nose.

Couldn’t anyone see it?

Me withering away from starvation. The inability I had to focus on anything other than the emptiness I constantly felt inside? Or how mean I acted towards absolutely everyone because I never had the energy to be nice?

“I’m so sorry.” The waitress muttered, a face bright red with embarrassment. Immediately she dropped to her knees scooping up the food ready for the bin.

I looked down at the Marinated chicken and Parmesan pasta laying on the floor.

She was covered, I was covered.

I tightened my lip in frustration.

I would eat that, right off the floor.

I couldn’t watch this.

I couldn’t just stand back and watch her scooping it up on the tray with a napkin. I couldn’t just watch her wipe up the dregs of remaining sauce that stained the laminate.

And why was everyone watching?

Hasn’t anyone ever seen someone drop food before?

My stomach growled, loudly.

I needed to get out of here, change my shirt.

The waitress, she was a flustered mess, scrubbing the floor with a dishcloth. She looked vaguely familiar but my jumbled brain couldn’t place her.

Honey-brown hair loosely swept back with a clip, fingernails bitten to a bloodied stump and a pale, freckle-free complexion was all I could see from my towering height.

“Next time,” I stated, causing her to look up at me with an innocent blue-eyed gaze. “You better watch where you’re going, whore.”

And with that insult, I just left.

MILLIE POV

“Ugh!” I grunted, faced with the obstacle of not having any shampoo for my morning shower.

It seemed to get like this every month. Forced into mixing shampoo with water just to make it last a little bit longer. At my feet were my bed sheets, cleaning in the shower water because I knew we were out of laundry detergent.

Grammys just wasn’t making money like it used to. Or a more likely reason, the money constantly got swept up by my mother and spent on things she deemed far more pressing.

“Mom!” I yelled to her comatose body as I pottered around the kitchen. She was asleep on the floor, again. She didn’t even stir or mumble, dead to the world.

“Mom!” The kitchen cupboards were empty too and the faucet just gave a clunky sound back when I switched it on.

“Mom!” I shouted one more time, nudging her with the tip of my foot. “I have to go grocery shopping, where’s the money?”

“We don’t have any.” She grumbled into the floor tiles and then waved me off with her hand. “I spent it.” My eyes rolled but at this point I wasn’t even surprised. One guess what she spent it on.

“Mom! I need cash!” She turned over to face me, her auburn hair stuck to her face and the imprint of the floor tile was left undignified on her cheek.

She smiled drunkenly at me and grabbed my face with two clammy palms.

“God, you’re so gorgeous Millie. A little princess.”

I couldn’t help but let out an annoyed scoff.

“Mom—”

“How did I make you?”

“I need cash Mom, we’re out of shampoo, toothpaste and laundry detergent. We need to hire a repair man for the sink and there’s no food either, I can’t have breakfast.”

“You know, I used to look like you once upon a time. Beautiful and young. All the boys wanted me.” She slurred.

I stood up, knowing full well I wasn’t going to get anything coherent from her and grabbed my school bag, looking over her one last time before I left.

“Mom,” I yelled with a sigh, “you’ve soiled yourself again, try to get cleaned up.”