Roomies Book Two: Quarantine

Chapter One: The Phone Calls

“This is really important Cameron. Really important. Are you listening?” Miranda’s voice sounded strained and slightly frantic.

“Uh huh.” Cameron spoke into his cell, definitely not listening. His eyes were completely on his current patient, Mrs. Ziggs, an eighty years young woman trying to sit up in her bed. She’d been bedridden for a month, due to a stroke, and was just now, in this very moment, trying to pull her shoulders up. It was a huge hurdle and the first step towards getting out of the hospital that she hated with all her heart. Cameron had answered his phone on instinct, but his total focus was on Mrs. Ziggs and her struggle.

“Cameron, please! I’m not even supposed to be calling anyone. No one here wants to start a panic, but it’s getting really serious. There are so many cases right where you live! You need to….”

“Sorry, Miranda. I have to go.” And he hung up, tucking his cell back into his jeans pocket.

“Come on, Sara. You can do this!” He reached his hand behind her shoulders, giving some support, but not too much. She had to do this on her own.

-----

“Ryan! Ryan! Listen! I tried talking to Cameron! He freaking hung up on me! I need to tell you guys…”

“Miranda? Is that you? Look, I can’t talk right now. I’ll call you back tonight.” And hung up.

“You fucking picked up the phone when I’m talking to you?!” the coach yelled, his face turning a very shocking shade of purple. “My star soccer player sprained his ankle! You need to get him up and moving before our next game! Do you hear me?? I don’t care what you have to do! Shots, tape! Whatever! Just get him mobile and able to compete by next week!”

Ryan gritted his teeth, smothered his desire to scream back at the middle aged man. He glanced at the poor kid laying on the gurney. Just a baby, seventeen or something. His hands were covering his face, as if he could hide away from the embarrassment and pain of the situation. They were fresh from the hospital, with a ton of papers the coach had shoved in Ryan’s face, all of which said Ken needed crutches and should stay off his leg for at least two weeks. Thank god Coach Winters was never like this, or any of Ryan’s own lacrosse coaches. This man needed some perspective. But Ryan had faced situations like this so many times already in his short career. He knew how to handle it.

He sighed. And longed for this evening. Cameron was making tomato bisque tonight, and Ryan desperately wanted to go home, eat his freaking dinner, lay down with his head in Cameron’s lap, and watch something stupid on Netflix. Just lay there and relax, listen to the late February rain, watch the fire, and relax with Cameron’s soft fingers running through his hair. Then later, have desperately hot sex. Even though his mouth made the right noises, calming the coach, reassuring the young soccer player, his mind was already at home, with his husband.

He completely forgot Miranda had even called.

-----

“You’re exaggerating, Miranda,” Jess chuckled. “I saw it on the news, but come on! It’s nothing, it will blow over. Look what happened with the bird flu and SARS. I know it feels important, honey but…”

“No! No! You’re not listening to me! It is bigger than either of those things. Seriously Jess! It spreads so quickly! And people are dying!”

“Well, ok. Thanks for letting me know, honey. I do appreciate it. I’ll talk to you soon.” And Jess hung up the phone, eyes immediately glued to the stack of essays in front of her. It was another lonely night, correcting papers in a cold house. She loved her students, and was proud of their hard work. But after a dinner of leftover pizza, some bagged spinach and an apple, her students’ papers really lost any appeal they might have once had.

Jess leaned back on the couch and looked around her. The dark living room. The empty kitchen. She had moved Cameron’s old record player downstairs, and was listening to some old Bowie. It was cold in the empty house, and her sad little heater hummed away, adding a deep hum to the music.

“Fuck this.” she said, and texted Mike to ask if she could come over and hang out with them.

-----

“Diego you need to listen to me! Please!”

“Miranda, you do realize that I’m on my honeymoon, right? Right this second I am laying on my bed, in a beautiful hotel room in Hawaii. My gorgeous husband and I just got back from the pool. We had more than a few colorful looking, fruity cocktails. Nate is in the shower. I’m lying naked on the bed. Can you guess what you are interrupting?” Diego laughed. Miranda always, always had horrible timing.

“Focus! Listen to me!”

“Miranda, there’s pretty much nothing you could say that is important enough for me to continue talking to you. Nate just got out of the shower, he’s walking towards me with nothing on, but a beautiful smile. So..I’ll talk to you…”

“Cameron’s life is in DANGER!!!”

“Ok.” His voice was instantly deadly serious. “You have my undivided attention. Nate. Stop. It’s Cameron, and it’s important.”

Miranda could hear Nate swear, as Diego turned on the speakerphone.

“We’re listening.” Nate said, his voice equally concerned.

“Thank God!!! Finally!” Miranda sobbed into the phone. “I’ve been calling and calling and no one will…”

“Miranda,” Diego cut her off. “The magic word was Cameron. What is going on?”

She haltingly told him, the words stumbling over and on top of each other. The skyrocketing numbers. The hospitals filling up. The decisions being made even as she skipped out of meetings to try and get through to loved ones.

“You need to come home now! They’re going to stop all flights. We’re going into lockdown so soon, it might be by the end of the week. And the highest numbers in all the state are right where Cameron and Ryan work. They need to stop, stay home! But I can’t get them to listen!”

“We’re on it. Nate is booking our flight home right now. Thanks Miranda. We’ll take it from here. You be safe. Love you.”

“Thank you! Thank you! Love you both. I’ll try and get in touch as soon as you get home.” Miranda’s relief was evident despite being broadcast over thousands of miles away.

Diego hung up. Brown eyes met green. Nate jumped off the bed, grabbed a suitcase and madly began tossing in their clothes, still naked as a bluebird.

“Our flight leaves in an hour. Do you think we can make it?” Nate groaned.

“We have to.” Diego was not about to be stuck thousands of miles away, cut off from his angel and Ryan during what Miranda was basically describing as an end of the world event. “Hurry.”

-----

Author’s Note: So, it begins. It’s kind of scary writing this. I want to continue the story of our four men, and I thought what better way to have them come together than the start of quarantine. But, it actually brought back many very scary memories. And everything is still so in flux. I hope you are as safe as you can be. Enjoy this story as a distraction. It’s going to be good.…

Chapter Two: What is Going On?

Cameron heard a strange dull thump. He blinked muzzily, gazing out into the dark room, as the bed dipped, and a freezing cold body cuddled up against him. Long arms wrapped around him, pulling him closer.

Cameron blinked again...very very confused. He was already laying next to Ryan. He could feel his husband’s head heavy on his outstretched arm. Then, over Ryan’s curly brown hair, he saw a dark skinned man, naked except for his boxers and a thin silver chain around his neck, slip into the other side of the bed. The cold arms around Cameron rubbed up and down his back, and he felt a pair of lips kiss him behind his ear.

The small man sat up, dislodging Ryan.

“Diego?” The man gave his angel a weary smile, leaned across the bed, over Ryan, to kiss him lightly on the lips. Cameron touched Diego’s cheek and turned over to face the cold body. “Nate?” Green eyes met gray, and Nate pulled Cameron back down, kissing his forehead and drawing him into a tight hug. Cameron immediately wrapped his arms around Nate’s neck, holding him close. Nate sighed contentedly, nuzzling into Cameron’s shoulder.

“What’s wrong? You guys aren’t supposed to come back for another week. Why...why...I’m so confused.” Cameron’s voice was thick with sleep and unease.

“Cameron…” Ryan sat up, rubbing his face, blinking. “What’s going on?”

“Go back to sleep,” Diego murmured, pushing Ryan back down gently, pulling him into his arms. “We had to come back early. But it’s been a long flight.” He sighed deeply, relaxing into the bed.

Nate reached beyond Cameron to touch Ryan’s shoulder, squeezing gently, before threading his fingers into Cameron’s shoulder length sandy brown hair. Ryan glanced at his friends, frowning.

“It’s ok, Ryan,” Diego said quietly. He could almost feel the waves of anxiety coming from the man next to him. “We’ll talk later. Nate and I are really tired. I promise. It can wait. We’re home.” Ryan faced him, and Diego ran a finger between the frown lines on Ryan’s forehead. “Come on man, lay your head, and go to sleep. At least for a few more hours. It’s only 3 in the morning.”

Ryan reluctantly lay back down. The bed was big enough for the four of them, but just barely. They were used to squeezing together; all four men felt better when they were in the same space. They didn’t care what people thought, not that anyone really knew outside their families, knew that they shared a bed more often than not. The people they cared about might have their own opinions about the situation, but since all four men were happy, employed, stable and healthy, what else was there to say? It’s not like they had sex together or anything. Both married couples were strictly intimate with their own partners. But after eight years togethers, the feelings between the four men were intertwined in a decidedly unorthodox arrangement. Deeply affectionate cuddling and light kissing, yes. Sexual orgies, no.

Ryan lay down, his back to his husband’s, Diego pulling him into his chest. He could feel Diego’s breath in his hair, his arm reaching over Ryan to caress Cameron. The lacrosse player closed his eyes, letting the sensation of being in bed with his friends wash over him, the feeling of comfort and safety.

And fell asleep.

====

It was a cold, damp morning in the Santa Cruz mountains. From the kitchen window, Cameron could see the forest around them, dark green branches and rising, furry redwood trunks. Ryan’s garden was not quite barren, some lone dark green, spinach and kale, ready to harvest. No pumpkins. Not until fall. Cameron tapped on the window pane briskly, seeing the family of deer that came by every morning without fail, despite the tall fence that Ryan had installed. The deer startled slightly, and walked away. They knew from experience that if they stayed, loud banging cookie trays would follow.

Cameron turned back to his kitchen, blearily opening the fridge to see what he could make for breakfast. They still had plenty of eggs, milk, and cheese. Omelets, then. He shuffled to the front door, still in his pajamas, slipped on his crocks, and walked outside, shivering slightly

It was brisk, no doubt, but Cameron walked slowly towards the garden, reveling in the deep, rich earthy smell of his front yard, hidden in the forest, listening to the call of birds, and the drip off the pine needles. Every time he was outside, reading with a cup of tea or gardening with Ryan, or playing with the kids when they visited, he couldn’t believe his luck. That he got to live here, in this beautiful place. It never got old, and he never took it for granted.

He opened the tall, wire fence, and moved into the garden, sitting down on one of the Adirondack chairs. Cameron knew he should just cut a few spinach leaves, and go make breakfast, but he still hated rushing. Giving himself a few minutes outside, breathing and zoning out, wouldn’t hurt anything.

Several minutes later, he felt a hand in his hair. Diego looked down on him, smiling and shaking his head.

“Fall asleep, angel?” He pulled Cameron to his feet, sat down in the chair, and tugged the smaller man back down, to cuddle in his lap.

Cameron sighed, content to feel Diego’s arms around him, breathing in the muscular man’s signature musky smell.

“Are you ever cold?” Cameron asked, running his hand briskly up and down Diego’s bare arms and behind his back. “It’s like 50 degrees out here and you’re practically naked.” The large form taking up the chair was garbed in only a pair of pink boxers.

“It’s a bit different than Hawaii, that’s for sure. Warm me up.”

Cameron smiled, and rubbed his hands harder on Diego’s back, then smirked, and straddled him. Diego bit his lip, gasping a little, as Cameron rocked just a whisper until he suddenly felt something come to life. He brought his face to Diego’s neck, kissed up to his ear, and blew a steady stream of warm air softly into it.

Diego breathed out harshly, tapping Cameron’s back, who took the hint and got off.

“Ok...enough...I’m a volcano.” Diego stood up, walking a little bit away. “Jesus baby. I’m literally covered in goosebumps.”

Cameron merely grinned. He finally knew he had all three men wrapped around his finger. It was fun making them sweat a little, every now and then. But he too had to turn around until his little reader was a tad less noticeable.

After a few moments, letting the cold air do it’s work, Cameron cut a handful of spinach, took Diego’s hand, and walked back inside. He kicked off his crocs, relishing the feel of the smooth wood under his bare feet. The house was considerably warmer, and Diego looked a little less blue as he sat on the kitchen stool, watching his baby cook breakfast.

“Will you set the table? I’m going to get them up.”

Diego rolled his eyes at Cameron’s choice of words, as the smaller man padded into the bedroom.

===

Ryan woke up slowly to find his beautiful husband laying on top of him. In seconds their mouths and tongues met, Ryan reaching behind to run his hands under Cameron blue thermal, relishing the feel of smooth skin stretched over lithe muscles.

“Me too. Me too. Me too.” Nate crooned, opening his green eyes, brushing the hair off Cameron’s forehead. The blonde haired man lay cuddled next to Ryan, face inches away. Cameron smiled sweetly, and kissed Nate softly on the lips, flicking his tongue a tiny bit to taste him.

“Oh my god! I missed you Cameron!” Nate pulled the smaller man in between them. Cameron spread out his arms, and both Nate and Ryan lay their heads on his chest, Cameron’s fingers running through their hair. Then pulled hard, sitting up.

“Come on. Breakfast’s ready.”

===

Forks scraped along the deep blue plates, until every last bit of omelet disappeared. Ryan sat back, wondering if now would be the moment the newlyweds would tell them why the hell they cut their trip short. But...guess not. Diego moved to build a fire and Nate stood up to help Cameron with the dishes. Ryan felt the unease build slowly, making acid burble inside his stomach.

Finally everyone met in the living room. Cameron sitting on the couch, his feet in Ryan’s lap. Nate and Diego just a few feet away sitting on the braided rug in front of the fire.

“Ok, spill. What’s going on?’ Ryan asked. Cameron took his hand and squeezed it, sharing his worry.

“Was Hawaii somehow not everything you dreamed?”

Diego shook his head. “Naw. It was perfect. We really wished you guys had come with us.”

Despite it being Diego and Nate’s honeymoon, the original plan was for them to all go to the islands together. Ryan’s lacrosse captain had refused his request for leave, and Cameron wouldn’t go without him. Again, it might be odd, but Diego and Nate had come with Cameron and Ryan to their honeymoon in Canada. It had been a wonderful trip for them all.

Nate and Diego exchanged an odd look, continuing.

“So...did you guys get a call from Miranda yesterday?” Nate said. He sat with his knees drawn up, arms wrapped around them. Diego’s face closed in on itself, as the fear once again came to rest in his heart. Looking at his three boys, he couldn’t stop himself from imagining the worst. A cough. A fever. He winced.

“Ummm...oh yeah! Yeah! She called me, but I was busy.” Cameron sat up, bewildered. “Why? Did she call you guys too? Is something wrong? Something wrong with the baby?”

Miranda and her wife Debra were expecting. Debra was six months pregnant, and although the boys didn’t see them that often, they were all excited with the idea of becoming honorary uncles.

“No, no. Well, no. Not that I know of. No,” Nate continued, looking serious. “Have you guys heard anything about this flu that’s spreading in China?”

Both men on the couch shook their heads. “No, we stopped watching the news a couple months ago. It was so stressful, waking up every morning, learning about some new atrocity committed by our monster in chief.”

Ryan was so not joking. Sometimes he and Cameron cried themselves to sleep, thinking about all the kids who bravely crossed the border to end up fenced in enclosures, babies taking care of babies. Black men and women being gunned down by white supremecists, only to have their president make a few racist remarks to further inflame the situation. They donated what little they could, but in order to keep their sanity, they decided to take a break from the news, feeling guilty as hell about their decision to shut their eyes in the face of what seemed like a never ending tragedy. But they decided that in order to help the people in their care, they had to. They just had to.

“Well, ok, so we only talked to Miranda for a little bit, but what she said is important.” Nate took a deep breath. “She said, Newsom is about to declare a lockdown, here in California.”

Ryan blinked. “What does that even mean? Why?”

Diego went on. “So...the flu is really bad. Really, really bad. It’s extremely contagious. There’s cases all over the world now. Some cruise ship passengers spread it, but other ways too. People are getting fevers, horrible coughs. They are being hospitalized. And..a lot of people are dying.”

“Oh my god.” Cameron’s face had gone white as a sheet.

“Miranda is in on some important meetings in Sacramento. She says the numbers are coming in, and more an more cases are being found in San Jose, and San Mateo County. She said, the governor’s going to lock down the state soon.”

“What does that mean?!” Ryan demanded, pulling Cameron closer to him.

“I don’t really know, but Miranda said it’s basically like it sounds. People are going to have to stay inside. To stop the spread of the virus.” Diego said, haltingly.

“We had to come back!” Nate groaned. “We didn’t want to get stuck in Hawaii.”

“No,” Cameron tried to joke. “Why? You could have been in paradise.”

Nate scooted over and put his head in Cameron’s lap. “Cupcake, do you really think we’d want to be separated from you both if something horrible happens?” He brought his arms tight around his boy’s waist. “No fucking way. No fucking way.”

Diego stood up and started pacing. “It’s like...like a movie. It doesn’t seem real. It like that Stephen King book, Cameron.” Diego and Cameron together had read all of King’s major novels. It was the first time Diego had gotten hooked on fiction.

“Don’t say that. You don’t mean that, right?” Cameron whispered. “Did Miranda say it’s that bad? Like...end of the world kind of bad?” He tried to sound skeptical, but it didn’t come out right.

Ryan was scrolling through his phone, his face grim. Diego moved to sit next to him, looking intently at the screen.

“It’s crazy.” Ryan whispered, the blue glow from the phone casting a strange light on his face. “What are we supposed to do? Just stay home? What about our patients? We’re not supposed to go to work?”

Cameron stood up, shocked. “I have to go to work Monday. Sara is stuck in the hospital. Mrs. Krein is getting his prosthetic. Mr. Yoon is having dialysis. I can’t just stay home! That’s crazy! I won’t do it.”

Diego jumped up, grabbed Cameron’s chin forcing him to look up into his brown eyes. “You WILL stay home, Cameron. You WILL. I know you care about your patients, but I will NOT risk you getting sick. I will NOT let you leave this house.”

Cameron jerked free, aghast. “You are NOT my husband! You’re NOT in charge of me! You DON’T get to tell me what to do. Even Ryan doesn’t get to tell me what to do! Don’t you dare think you can!”

“Do you know how FUCKING SCARED I AM??!! Do you think I want anything to happen to you?? Do you think I flew home because this is some kind of JOKE?? I LOVE YOU, CAMERON! I will NOT let anything happen to you!”

Nate jumped up and stood between them, as Ryan completely ignored the drama, still reading on his phone. Cameron’s husband didn’t bother saying anything. Cameron wasn’t going to work. There was no possible other outcome. No need to jump up and down and get in some kind of power struggle. And Cameron honestly knew it, too. He just wasn’t ready to admit it. Ryan knew his husband much better than Diego.

“Ok, ok, cool off, babes.” Nate held out his hands. “Let’s just cool off a little. We’re all scared. This is crazy talk and we all just need to process. Diego, let’s go for a walk, just to the creek. Cameron’s not going to jump in his car and go to work, while we’re gone, right, baby?”

Cameron flipped both men off, stomped to the bedroom and slammed the door. Diego snarled and moved to follow, but visibly shook himself when Nate put a hand on his shoulder. “Ok! Ok! Let’s just get some air.”

Ryan sat there. Breathed. Thought. Considered. Tried to calm the fear threatening to overwhelm him. Looked out the living room window to see his best friends walking away. Looked to his bedroom door.

Then numbly picked up his phone, and started to text his family. Jess. Mike. Coach.

He would make sure the people he loved were safe.

Chapter Three: Flashbacks In the Garden

Ryan knocked on the bedroom door, and then slowly entered. But he knew what he would find. And he was right. Cameron was curled up in the window seat, nose in his current book. Never failed. Any kind of stress sent his husband immediately to his comfort zone. It had been almost thirty minutes since Diego and Nate had left for their walk, and that was more than enough time for Cameron to become completely oblivious to everything and anything around him. He didn’t react at all when Ryan kneeled down next to him. Until Ryan brushed his hand up and down Cameron’s arm. And even then, it took a few seconds for Cameron to look up.

“Hey.” Ryan said softly. “You ok?”

Cameron sighed, and put his open book upside down on his knee. “Yeah. I’m sorry I got so mad. It’s just….bleah! Crazy! So weird. I don’t even...don’t even know what to do or say.”

“I know. It’s like everything turned upside down in just an hour.” Ryan took Cameron’s book, placed it on the the bedside table. “Come on. Let’s go garden, ok?’

His husband smiled. “Ok.”

Ryan led him outside. They stood together in front of the house, just holding each other and breathing in deeply. Cameron turned his head to kiss Ryan on the cheek. Then together they gathered up the tools from their shed, and went into the garden.

This place was Ryan’s special domain, his project, his focus when at home. Growing up, no one in his family was a gardener, or into plants, although his parents did take him camping when he was really young. No, the garden actually came about from a surprising turn of events.

-----

7 years ago, two days after high school graduation

Mike: Hi Ryan

Ryan: Uhhh..hi?

Mike: I was wondering if you’d like to meet me for dinner tonight. Just you and me. Cameron can stay and have dinner with John and Leah.

Ryan: Sure. I guess.

Mike: Great! I’ll pick you up around 6. Ok? Where would you like to go?

Ryan: I’m not picky. Anywhere is fine.

Mike: Sounds good. See you at 6.

Ryan was more than a little nervous as he pawed through the boxes in his room. He had packed up Cameron and his stuff just yesterday in preparation for their move to the Santa Cruz cabin this weekend. But he knew where everything was; Ryan was a methodical, organized person on his best days. All the boxes were labeled carefully. The difficult part was trying to decide what to wear, but he figured a sweater and jeans was always a safe bet.

When he and Cameron got together in early May, and shared their relationship with Jess, the decision had been made for Cameron to continue living with the Winters until they moved out together after graduation in June. It was a better transition for Leah too, to spend some time with Cameron who she adored, before she lived alone with her new dads. Ryan was ok with it; they still saw each other every day at school, spent afternoons together, ate dinner together. They only slept in different houses. Most of the time. Weekends Cameron came home to spend time with his mom. But...she still spent a few hours even on Saturday and Sunday in her classroom. Plenty enough time to ….well..you know.

Mike’s text came out of left field. He had barely ever spoken with the man. But, maybe he wanted to talk to Ryan about them living together when they were so young. It made his stomach hurt to think of everything that could go wrong, any kind of obstacle that might keep him and his boy apart. It had all been so perfect for the last month and he just sincerely hoped Mike wasn’t going to say or do something to change that.

Mike picked Ryan up and drove them to a restaurant in Los Gatos, kind of an upscale pizza place. They sat down, Ryan nervously toying with his napkin, ordering a pumpkin and chorizo pizza to share.

Mike took a sip of his water. Looking over at the young man in front of him. “I hope you like this place. Their pizza is really delicious, unusual.”

Ryan looked around. It had a casual vibe despite the prices. Living with the Tanner’s, he became accustomed to carefully checking how much things cost; a huge difference from how he grew up.

“I bet Cameron would like it here.” Ryan said quietly, biting his cheek and stretching his long legs under the table.

“He does,” Mike smiled. “We’ve been here a few times before. But only for special occasions.”

Ryan nodded, unsure what to say. Mike was an important person in Cameron’s life, basically his dad. In his early 60’s, the programmer was quiet and self contained, confident and calm; a lot like Cameron in some ways, although he had a layer of polish that Ryan found slightly intimidating.

“So...how are you doing? Are you excited for the move this weekend? Anything I can help with? John and I are happy to pay for a Uhaul or anything you need.”

“Ummm, thanks. Our friend Chris had a truck, and we don’t really have that much stuff. My grandma’s house still has furniture. When she passed away, my dad had an estate sale so all her stuff is gone, and we rented it out for the last few years. When my parents…” Ryan coughed. “Ummm...you know..went to prison, the renters moved out and our lawyers cleaned the place up. I’ve been up there a few times since it was given to me, with Miranda. It’s clean and ready for Cameron. I think...he’s going to love it. There’s like lots of trees and…”

Ryan took a deep breath. He knew he was rambling on, but he so nervous; why in the world did Mike want to have dinner with him?

Mike noticed Ryan’s obvious discomfort. “It’s ok, Ryan. John and I know you care about Cameron. While it does seem a little early to move in together, it’s not like you weren’t already roommates. I am a little concerned about you boy’s living so far away, and setting up a household on your own. But part of why I wanted to talk to you was just to make sure you knew that you can always come to us for any help you need.” He smiled brightly to see Ryan relax a little. Poor boy seemed on edge so often.

“And also,” he continued. “To ask if maybe, you, Ryan, would like to get to know John and I a little better. Not just for Cameron’s sake. We’re Leah’s parents now,” Mike grinned. He always got a little shiver of glee saying that. “And she’s your sister. We’d really like you to be a part of our family, if you’ll have us. You don’t have to answer now. Just think about it.”

Ryan was nonplussed. Mike and Coach wanted...what? To be part of his life? To be his...what? Guardians? Fathers? Gay spirit guides?

Perfect timing. The pizza arrived, hot and delicious smelling. They ate a little, changing the subject to talk about how graduation went and Cameron’s latest interest in baking cookies. While Ryan sat there, mulling over what Mike had offered and what it might mean to him and Cameron’s future. Conversation turned to Leah and how she was adjusting to living at the Winter’s place.

“We started family counseling just last week. A place for Leah to talk about your parents, and what it’s like to live with us. We talked it over with our therapist. This is a big ask, Ryan, but we wondered if you would be willing to come with us? We could work around any of your practices of course.”

Again, Ryan felt thrown for a loop. “What about Cameron?” He’d feel far better if Cameron went with him. He barely knew Leah’s new dads. The idea of going to therapy and talking about his parents with three people who were virtually strangers made him cringe.

“Of course, he can join us if he’d like. What do you think? It’s ok if you want to say no, Ryan. No pressure. Really. Do you want dessert? They make a mean deep fried ice cream! Cameron always has it when he comes here.”

----

So, he and Cameron ended up going to therapy. And it wasn’t horrible. In fact, it was kind of nice to sit together and talk about stuff. Mike and Coach always made him feel included in everything happening with Leah, and sitting with Cameron and holding his hand, Ryan had been able to share some of his feelings of anxieties and fears about being left, about being alone. It led to Ryan seeing Dr. Heldmayer by himself a few times. She encouraged him to find something to do with Mike to create a better bond with Leah’s new family. He and Coach already had sports. Ryan decided to start a garden at their new place with Mike’s help. It made perfect sense. Cameron loved food. A vegetable garden was something they could share too. The Winters came up the mountain a couple times a week during that summer, to work with Ryan and Cameron on the project. Leah had a blast, and Ryan found that he did too. Most evenings he made time weeding, or mulching or doing odd little tasks. Sometimes Cameron read outside while he worked, sometimes he helped. It was nice, Ryan found, soothing.

And now, seven years later, his garden was still thriving, still a major part of his life. It was a place where he could unwind and calm down. Cameron loved the fresh veggies and Ryan always felt a huge sense of pride and accomplishment when his husband made dinner with the garden’s offering. And it was a common thread shared with Mike, every winter planning their spring planting, and offering each other tips and advice.

Today, as the sun finally peeked through the February clouds, he and Cameron worked on composting some kale going to seed, thinning the spinach, just a few odds and ends. Ryan noticed that his husband was distracted, looking up every now and then to the path that led the creek. After about ten minutes, he was unsurprised to see Cameron jump up as Diego and Nate appeared.

Cameron walked quickly up to Diego. “I’m sorry,” he said simply, rocking back and forth on his heels. “I know that you are just scared. I’m scared too. I’m sorry for yelling at you.” Although they did occasionally fight, like anybody, conflict still made Cameron extremely uncomfortable.

Diego looked down at Cameron, sighed, and pulled him up into his arms. Cameron’s leg’s automatically went around his waist, head on on the other man’s shoulder. Diego walked with him in his arms into the house, leaving Nate behind, smiling, shaking his head.

The green eyed man joined Ryan in the garden, automatically helping out without instructions. While the garden had been Ryan’s project in the beginning, with a little help from Mike, now he and Nate worked on it steadily. Gardening and food production was Nate’s passion; he literally majored in it in college, and now worked as a public relations lead for an agri-education foundation. Which usually meant going into the gardens and local farms, interviewing people and posting on social media or organizing events or fundraisers. As an appealing and attractive extrovert, it was an ideal job. But he still loved getting his hands dirty.

As they worked, and Cameron and Diego made amends in the house, Ryan remembered back to when Nate had become a larger part of their lives.

====

Six Years ago, Summer between First and Second Year of College

Two and a half months of no school. Sweet, sweet summer vacation. No lacrosse practice at 6:30 am, no more away games where Cameron was left at home alone, no more homework, no more.

Awesome.

Even Cameron’s job at the library ended. They had a little cushion, from Ryan’s share of his grandma’s trust, the interest paying for most of the household costs not covered by Ryan’s scholarship. And both Ryan and Cameron had been very very grateful to discover that Jess had started a college fund for Cameron when he was a baby; it was more than enough to pay for Cameron’s college tuition, as well as a fairly decent amount of money for having fun over summer break. She’d sprung it on them after graduation, to everyone’s great surprise.

“Every tutoring session, every committee stipend, every paycheck, I put a little in. It wasn’t much, but you know I always put your future first Cameron. I had to borrow all my college tuition in federal loans, and it took me almost ten years to pay it back. I struggled through school, working nonstop. It was horrible. I don’t ever want you to experience that.” She kissed him, handing him the bank account book. “It’s yours. I know you and Ryan will be responsible. Don’t blow it all on condoms and lube.” She whispered the last in his ear, causing her son to blush the color of firetruck.

And now, the summer was theirs to enjoy. Sleeping in. Fucking all day if they want to. Watching TV. Cameron reading until his eyes burned. Ryan gaming until 3 am. Going for walks in the woods near their cabin.

But best of all, Nate was home for the summer, and even though Diego was still working, the four guys spent a ton of time together. Just hanging out, or going on drives around the Bay Area. Fooling around in Nate’s family pool, finally teaching Cameron to swim.

One day, they decided to split up. Diego and Cameron really wanted to go to a guest lecture at the Museum of Modern art, some Japanese sculpturist that used found objects as a medium. All four boys had been to the MOMA quite a bit this year, and both athletes had had enough. Ryan and Nate colluded behind their boyfriends’ backs, saying that they needed to babysit Mia and Leah, so sorry...darn it! They wouldn’t be able to go. Diego and Cameron were more than happy to go alone. They set off in Diego’s car, saying they planned on coming home in the early evening, after walking around in Golden Gate Park and having dinner. Leaving Nate and Ryan at loose ends.

They sat in the living room, gaming for an hour or so. This year, they’d been able to mend fences and put the past behind them, getting closer and resuming the friendship they had started their senior year of high school. But sometimes things were still a little awkward between them. Playing video games was an easy activity, since they didn’t really have to “talk” too much to each other.

But after a while, Nate threw down his controller. “Dude!” he said, standing up and walking to the mirror. “It’s a freaking beautiful day. Let’s go outside. I can’t sit on my ass anymore.”

Ryan shrugged, and stood up. “That’s cool, but like, what do you want to do?” He joined Nate by the window.

“Show me what you’re doing in your garden these days.”

So Ryan had walked Nate through his garden, proud of everything he’d achieved. But that only took up about thirty minutes or so. They had almost four hours until Cameron and Diego got back.

“Did Cameron ever tell you where I took him for that date?” Nate asked, rolling his eyes at the memory.

“Yeah,” Ryan said. “Do you mean for that marathon date where you tried to do everything you possibly could to impress him, and instead you ended up completely turning him off, so much that he jumped into bed with me? That date?”

“Dude! You totally suck! You were such an asshole! You fucking kissed the boy you knew I liked. Some best friend you were.” Nate punched him, as they walked inside, leaving their dirty shoes by the door.

“Alls fair in love and war,” Ryan said. “I didn’t even worry about you for a second. Sorry not sorry! Oh man, that was the best fucking night of my life.” He rubbed it in, as Nate groaned.

“Dude, so...anyway. Do you want to go check out the farm I took him to? It’s really a great place, and the garden there is huge. It’s probably about an hour drive there, from here, but what else do we have to do?”

So, they took a road trip, bombing down backroads in Ryan’s car. Nate sat in the passenger seat, singing at the top of his lungs to Ryan’s playlist, his feet up on the dashboard. Every now and then, Ryan looked over at him, the sun glinting off Nate’s curls, and wondered what it would be like to be so relaxed, to take life as it came at him, effortlessly. The one thing Ryan remembered about his friendship with Nate, was that the swimmer was alway smiling and laughing. He made people around him at ease, joking but never in a mean way. It was nice to be around someone so extroverted, at least, some of the time. Both Ryan and Cameron were quiet people. But whenever Nate was around, there was always fun to be had.

The garden was everything Nate said and more. It was amazing! Ryan and Nate spent a long time there, walking among the beds, talking about compost, best times to plant and harvest, natural pest repellants. The smell of lavender and basil, green onions and tomatoes swept over the area, alongside the earthy smell of manure and animals. Cameron had told Ryan it was a cool place, and he was right.

Afterwards they went to a field filled with daisies. They sat down on a bench nearby. Nate pulled the food he’d insisted they pick up on the way, from this backpack. He handed Ryan a sandwich and took out some chips and drinks. Nate liked food just as much as Cameron, and loved sharing his “finds” with everyone.

“So, did you take Cameron here too? This seems awfully romantic.” Ryan teased, wolfing down his sandwich.

“No...nope. Actually, I didn’t. This place is just for me and you.” Nate winked at Ryan.

“Funny.” He stood up, walking over to the flowers, and picking a handful. “Then here you go, a bouquet.”

Nate laughed and accepted it. Ryan sat down, and watched as Nate made a long daisy chain in between eating his late lunch. Again, the lacrosse player was struck by how relaxed Nate was. He just seemed so content, looking up at the blue sky, grinning at the flowers,draping in over his lap as the chain got longer, one leg tucked under him. Ryan found himself checking out his friend’s body, and shook himself. Nate glanced at him and smirked, arched his back the tiniest bit, cocking his head up a little, the way Cameron often did in order to show off his neck. Something he knew Ryan found super hot.

“Are you..” Ryan asked, snorting. “Are you..flirting with me?”

Nate bit his lip, and asked, “Do you want me to? Cause gotta say, seems like you’re doing a little flirting yourself.”

“You seem different today,” Ryan admitted honestly. “I feel like...I don’t know. It’s weird.”

“What? You don’t think I’m hot?” Nate opened his green eyes wide. It should have been laughable. Should have been nauseating. But...it wasn’t. Ryan let his eyes roam up and down Nate’s body; the other boy smiling slowly, knowingly.

“It’s just...you’re finally realizing that I’m...well, I’m Cameron, in my relationship with Diego. You did know that, right?” Nate said lazily as he continued making the daisy chain.

Ryan startled. “I...I never really thought about it. That’s so none of my business.” But instantly his brain showed him an image of Diego bending over Nate, hands on his hips, bringing him hard onto his dick. And before he could stop himself, he imagined his own hands on Nate, and wondered what it would feel like to fuck him.

“Jesus. I hope you don’t ever play poker.” Nate laughed outright. “You just eye fucked me! Ryan! You totally did!”

Ryan got up quickly and walked away into the middle of the field, mortified. Nate sat back, giving Ryan some alone time, finishing up his own lunch and throwing the daisy chain on the ground. Finally he stood up and joined his friend.

Ryan couldn’t even look at Nate. “Dude, I’m….jesus...I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be,” Nate said, quietly, taking Ryan’s hand. The other man immediately looked up into Nate’s green eyes. “I’m not offended. I think you’re attractive Ryan. I always have. Even when I first met you. I just thought you were straight. And...I was pretty interested in Cameron, so I wasn’t really looking at anyone else.”

Ryan sighed. Maybe things had gotten a little more complicated than he’d intended when he’d left the house today.

===

“Who wants ice cream?” Cameron asked, moving to the kitchen, the other boys following. The museum was awesome, the lecture was so amazing. He’d had such a wonderful time. Watching Diego fanboy over art was one of Cameron’s happiest moments. He scooped out four bowls of honey praline, and handed each boy a bowl. Cameron flopped down on the couch. Diego sat next to him, kissing him on the cheek. Ryan sat on the other side, smiling at his boyfriend. Cameron was surprised to see Nate sit next to Ryan, instead of Diego. And was further astounded to see Ryan smile at Nate, when the golden haired boy used his spoon to steal a bite from Ryan’s bowl.

Cameron sat back, his eyes on the screen, but his mind whirling. Thinking. Considering. Diego glanced down, seeing his angel frowning.

“Everything ok?” he whispered, trying not to interrupt the movie.

Cameron looked up at Diego, thought about the day they’d spent together, thought about….other times they’d spent together. He looked at Ryan and Nate who were whispering about something. Then back at Diego.

“Yeeeesss? I guess?”

Ryan had overheard. And again, felt a little anxious. Things between the four of them seemed to be shifting. It wasn’t necessarily bad, but it was definitely...different. He looked at the way Diego was watching Cameron, then felt Nate’s knee pushing into his. Cameron pulled Ryan down into a deep kiss, surprising him. He could feel Cameron trembling a little.

“Are you ok?” Ryan repeated, when they pulled apart, echoing Diego. Cameron frowned at Nate, who immediately took the hint, going to sit at Diego’s feet.

“I...I’m...umm….let’s just watch the movie.” Cameron muttered.

And the rest of the night, Nate stayed by Diego, while Cameron repeatedly kept Ryan at his side, more possessive than his boyfriend had ever seen. It had been a confusing evening, and when the other couple left for the night, Cameron pulled Ryan into the bedroom for an hours long session of sex that left him breathless and exhausted.

“Don’t you dare forget that you’re mine,” Cameron had seethed into Ryan’s ear at one point, his hand yanking hard on Ryan’s cock. “This is mine. Mine.” Ryan moaned as Cameron proceeded to suck and bite him all over, branding him repeatedly with red welts, riding him rough, twisting his balls and yanking his hair until it hurt in the best possible way.

“You’re so fucking hot when you’re angry, Cameron.” Ryan moaned.

“Shut up, and fuck me.” Cameron commanded, grabbing Ryan’s throat.

And he did.

====

Present Day, 7 years later

Ryan sat back in one of the garden chairs and looked at the bedroom window, knowing that Diego and Cameron were probably apologizing to each other. Inside. On the bed. He knew they wouldn’t cross the line, but again, after eight years, those lines were getting blurrier day by day, despite wedding rings. Nate proved his point, by sitting in Ryan’s lap, not a new position for him. Ryan put his arms around the golden boy, snuggling him closer. Nate nuzzling his neck.

“It’s going to be ok, Ryan,” he said. “Let’s give them a few more minutes and then we’ll try and talk again about what we are going to do about all of this.”

Ryan sat back, Nate warm and heavy in his lap, and tried to relax as best as he could. Even though the world seemed to be falling apart, at least they had each other.

A/N: Ok...so granted...this is a little awkward. And maybe...maybe a little boring? I wanted to give some more depth to Ryan and show some of how Nate fit into this foursome thing they got going on. But I don’t know if I really achieved it. There definitely will be plot in this book, but also a ton of character stuff, because that’s what I really like to write.

Bleah...comment and let me know if this chapter did anything for you.