The Life I Used To Live

Iris pov~

,“ your lying I know you cheated”.

I’m crying and he is getting angry I keep telling him I’m not cheating or anything I’m his wife.

He comes and grips my shoulders hard shaking me, I scream and say,”PLEASE S-STOP”!!

He lets go and says,” whatever everything better be done when I get back from work”.

I nod crying waiting on him to leave he has been doing this for about a couple of years now.

I decided after he left I was going to do my all to make sure he’s happy because I love him.

My name is Iris Baker 26 years old and this is my story of how I longed to be loved.

As I wait to hear his car pull off I go look in the mirror to see more bruises I will have to cover up, I sigh looking at myself and see a woman who doesn’t know what she wants anymore and gets ran over.

I glare at myself as my head is telling me I’m worthless.

I roll my eyes and get in the shower getting ready for the day, I have to do some errands.

I cover myself with some clothes to hide the bruises on my body fresh and old, all I have done was stay by his side when he needs me most but what do I get him being insecure thinking I’m cheating he’s even stopped me from going to my own birthday party then left me after begging me to stay home once he got the okay he swore work called him.

I dress up a little more than usual to make myself feel better, and when I look in the mirror I can feel my confidence boost though I’m wondering how my husband will react since he is the reason I stopped dressing up or going out.

I take a picture of myself and well I can’t post it because I don’t have social media he took that from me too.

I pack the lunch I made and hop in my car headed to my husbands office to drop lunch off who’s name is Lester.

On my way there I play some music singing along.

Tried to be gangsta, tried to keep it together but I'm falling apart

Don't know what happened, I guess I really love you

Guess I gave you my heart

Even though I know you're wrong

And I knew it all along

That don't mean it doesn't hurt, baby

Waking up to see you gone

I pull up and hop out to see I’m getting more stares than usual I smile in return I haven’t been here in forever since my husband said I didn’t need to work, I put up a fight until he slapped me one day and I told myself it would be the last but that was a lie after that it was more frequent.

I head to the elevator of his and get on heading to the top floor.

When I’m off I see our friend Sean who I was close with until my husband told me stay away and I listened why because he’s my husband and I love him I just wish he would spend more time with me like we used to.

Sean looks me up and down and says,” wow Iris nice seeing you it’s been a while”.

I nod smiling and say,” hey Sean yea it has but I must get going I have to give my husband lunch”.

He nods and I walk off something telling me to look over my shoulder and when I do I catch Sean staring at my calves.

I get to my husbands office and step inside without knocking just in time to see him and his new secretary kissing, so this is what he’s been doing.

I see they don’t even notice me so I back out and close the door back a little and listen in.

My husband says,” mhm honey I love you you’re my little vixen”.

The lady says,” I love you I just wish I can be with you all the time”.

I can tell my husband sighed and hear him say,” yea me too but we both know what’s best for us and the kid it will be okay soon”.

I choke, kid what does he mean kid please don’t tell me she’s pregnant.

I decide wether I should stay or go but what I hear next makes me sick,” she will pay for what she did honey I made her my wife for a reason though it was always you”.

I glare burning the whole building down mentally what did I do to deserve this, I spin around tears threatening to spill out and just as I turn the corner I bump into something only to look up seeing Sean Jackson.

Sean says,” hey you okay Iris”.

I nod and say,” thank you I must go now”.

I drop the lunch running down the stairs forgetting about the elevator, I make it to the bathroom and go in a stall to calm my breathing down.

While inside I hear ladies come in and sigh wanting to be far away from here so I can plan something anything I’m tired of being weak cause I’m not.

I hear a lady say,” yes I wonder why Mr. Baker hired the new secretary unless he got tired of fucking Marissa”.

I cover my mouth he was fucking Marissa that’s why she always mean mugged me.

I hear another one say,” where do you think his wife is she used to come all the time”.

The other one says,” who cares I still want a bite of that he’s so fine have you seen his dimples they are panty droppers thats for sure”.

I groan tired of them talking about my husband so I step out and see them look at me with surprise on their face.

I say,” hello ladies”.

They wave and I say,” listen I could care less because he would never bat an eyelash at you unless yah know for the panties you’re so willingly ready to give away”.

I wash my hands after bumping a lady who was by the sink out the way then smile at them heading to the door.

Once I open it I turn around flashing a bitchy smile and say” nice day ladies”.

I walk out and head to my car but when I’m outside I see Sean and Lester arguing hmm oh well not my problem.

How could he and how long has he been cheating on me for, I knew I was a fool to marry a conceited asshole, I should have knew when he was late to the wedding and came drunk forgetting his own vows.

I’m hurt I wasted my time I was with him since high school we got married in college though my parents warned me since he had money he would think he could run me.

I have money just not as much as him I helped build his business he has now I have shares to every company I paid with my own money not his.

Just as I’m getting in my car I hear my name and it’s Lester.

I roll my eyes and he looks panicked then says,” what are you doing here”.

I roll my eyes again and he grips my arm tight finally taking in what I’m wearing I get scared when I see this murderous look in his eyes.

I say,” L-Lester it hurts please stop okay”.

Lester says,” don’t think I won’t embarrass you Iris now what are you wearing”.

I clench my jaw and say,” look I was here to see if you wanted to go get lunch like old times”.

He scoffs and says,” why would I want to go to lunch with you”.

I giggle and say,” funny you say that when it should be me but you know what don’t say I didn’t try”.

I can see him mad he’s red as a tomato I say,” what wanna try it because I can see the journalist having a field day with this”.

He scoffs and says” you wouldn’t your weak”.

I laugh and say,” BILLIONAIRE LESTER BAKER SAW HITTING HIS WIFE NOR DO THEY BE SEEN TOGETHER”.

I glare ripping my arm out of his hold and say,” try me Lester you’ll meet a new Iris one you never knew”.

He smirks and says,” oh really if that’s so why don’t you go home and do what I said”.

I roll my eyes and he growls just as I see his secretary come out dressed slutty making me laugh.

Lester doesn’t see her he’s facing me I say,” okay here I’ll go but I want a kiss and you to say you love me”.

He sighs running a hand though his hair and kisses my lips while I deepen it feeling no emotions but I know I wowed him with the kiss because he touch his lips.

I hug him and he holds me a little longer I sigh smirking at the secretary who’s glaring at us but I wink at her.

I say,” okay I’ll go bye honey I love you”.

Lester smiles a real one and I wish I could have made that happen all the time before he had to run off and do things.

Lester kisses the top of my head and says,” no Iris I love you”.

I laugh and lay a hand in his chest acting and say,” okay stop it silly I must go have a good day and yea I know don’t wait up”.

He nods beaming a perfect smile of pearly whites showing dimples the ladies love then as soon as I get in the car I pull off only to see him and the secretary hugging I sigh couldn’t even wait at least till I was off the street.

I don’t even have it in me to do what he says anymore so I just went home forgetting about the errands if he wants that’s what he has a secretary for.

I got home and showered then put on the tv drinking a glass of wine later on there’s a knock on our door making me raise a brow because no one knocks.

I pause my show and get up wine glass in tow I’ve been carrying it everywhere since I got home and right now I’m about 6 glasses of expensive wine in and feeling the booze.

I open the door to reveal Sean and smirk giggling at the look of amusement on his face.

I say,” and what do I owe the pleasure of being graced with Sean Jackson’s presence”.

He chuckles and I smile at the sound of it Sean says,” I wanted to make sure you got home okay”.

I raise a brow and say,” uhm if you don’t mind me asking why”.

I see him gasp and his eyes go to fire he’s mad and hell how can I tell well I used to know him very well but I feel it.

Next thing I know is he raises his hand and I flinch back making him sigh.

I look away and down the rest of my wine Sean says,” did he do this”.

I scoff and laugh a sad one then say

,” wouldn’t be the first time”.

I forgot I had on revealing clothes showing my bruises.



I roll my eyes and spin around going to take a seat on the couch refilling my glass with more wine.

I see Sean walk in and he says,” stay there”.

I nod not feeling nothing but emptiness and gulp more wine down as I turn on some music and sing along.

I looked in the mirror for the first time and saw that

Hey (hey)

I am not my hair

I am not this skin

I am not your expectations, no (hey)

I am not my hair

I am not this skin

I am the soul that lives within

I think back to what I saw today and don’t know what to do my whole life all I seen was Lester in it I never looked past it I always thought we would be together forever.

I tear up and let some fall looking at our wedding photo hanging up in front of me I look at us to see Lester eyes were looking at me with a real smile though he was drunk and late I still loved him.

Sean says,” here take this it will help with the pain”.

I look up at him to see him looking at me in awe as he hands me a Tylenol and then I see him rub some stuff in his hand putting it on me and I must say his hands feel better than Lester’s mean gripping one’s it feels like Sean is taking care of me.

Sean says,” what happened”.

I sigh sipping my wine and say,” what did I ever do to deserve it”.

I look away from Sean and at the wine inside my glass dark just how I’m feeling inside.

Sean starts rubbing my legs putting the cream on which smells so good like lavender.

He works his way up to my neck and I hiss when he touches the most recent spot.

Sean says,” sorry it will feel better why don’t you leave”.

I laugh and say,” yea like I can we both know it won’t happen”.

Sean sighs and I say,” look don’t feel bad for me I chose this path”

Sean says,” no look at me you didn’t you never asked for that and he didn’t vow that either”.

I nod tears falling slowly then say,” did you know”.

Sean says,” as in know what”.

I roll my eyes gulping the last wine and say

,” THAT HE WAS CHEATING”.

Sean sighs and says,” yes I did but you don’t talk to me I don’t see you and well we both know he will ruin me if I ever help you”.

I nod knowing it’s true Lester will go to hell and back to make peoples lives miserable.

I say,” well he is I seen it”.

I break down telling Sean everything as I lean on him.

By the end Sean says,” wow we need to get you out soon this isn’t good I wish I knew sooner”.

I say,” don’t you are here now”.

Sean kisses my head and I back up sitting straight confused with myself and say,” okay you need to leave before Lester gets here and it will be another story”.

Sean nods and says,” you don’t have to run forever night Iris take care call me if you need me my numbers still the same”.

I smile and say,” I will and thank you for everything”.

I walk Sean to the door and when he leaves I sigh whatever I felt was just because he was there for me that’s what I tell myself but why does it feel so much more.

I decide to stand on my own 2 feet from now on, I sip my wine fully drunk now but I feel great knowing I have some people in my corner when this ends.

I go change into something sexy and do my makeup then sit in the chair turning off all the lights waiting in the living room.

I don’t know how long I waited or how many glasses of wine I had but I know I’m passed drunk and hear keys knowing Lester is home, I look at the digital clock to see it says 3am I sigh.

Lester switches the lights on and I say,” well look at you”.

Lester eyes me and says,” I thought you would be sleep”.

I laugh and stand up then say,” I thought you would be home seems like we should stop thinking though I have already”.

Lester growls and says,” Iris watch it”.

I laugh and yell,” OR WHAT LESTER YOUR GONNA HIT ME BEEN THERE DONE THAT”!!

Lester glares and walks towards me this is usually the part where I would run or block myself but not today.

Lester picks me up by my arms my feet off the floor I laugh once again then head butt him causing him to drop me I get up.

Lester says,” Iris you bitch”.

I laugh and say,”Lester you bitch”.

He growls running towards me and slams me into the wall where I hear a crack and my head hurts I feel dizzy.

I spit on him and say,” fuck you”.

Lester says,” what’s going on Iris we were just good when you seen me earlier”.

I won’t give him the advantage of letting him know I know he’s cheating.

I say,” wanna know why it’s because you don’t love me your always gone do I even mean anything to you”.

Lester actually looks at me and I am tearing up it’s like he can see what he’s doing is wrong I see him look like the young Lester I know but I won’t be fooled.

Lester says,” I’m so sorry Iris fuck I hurt you again”.

I nod and say,” yea well I’m going to bed I tried Lester night and sleep in the guest room”.

I walk away before he can say more Lester growls and says,” Iris I’m not done get back here”.

I don’t stop and next thing I know I’m slammed into the stair railings and my back is hurt.

I look up at him and say,” yea go ahead add to the bruises fuck you and that room”.

I hurry upstairs limping away from him and go to our room grabbing pajamas then head to the guest room.

It’s a whole new day and I wake up groaning eyes blurry head hurting.

I close my eyes back because drinking that much wine was not a good idea but who cares I am a new woman today let’s hope Lester is gone.

I wake up fully after another 10 minutes later groaning head pounding, I sit up and see the time then smile coming up with my plan which is ready to be executed.

I get up and stretch taking note of the blood on the pillow from my head and gasp shaking my head.

I cry a little until I tell myself he’s not worth the tears.

I get in the shower in the guest room and after washing the blood out my hair I head to our room once in my robe, I get there to see no sign of Lester and sigh relived.

I get ready after rubbing my lotion and stuff on noticing my bruises are almost gone whatever Sean rubbed on me I will need to ask him for it though I’m sure more bruises will appear from last nights fight,today I’m going into the office to give Lester a run for his money.

I wear no makeup and get dressed as I’m listening to music me and Sean’s favorite song come on though Lester used to hate it.

I got a man, but I want you

I got a man, but I want you

And it's just nerves, it's just dick

Makin' me think 'bout someone new

You know I got so much to say

I try to hide it in my face

And it don't work, you see through

That I just want get wit' you

And you're right

Girl, I want you like you want me too

I feel that energy (ooh, yeah)

I smile at the end and head out the house after checking myself out and grabbing what I need.

Sean’s pov~

I walk out my office to head towards the meeting when I see Lester kissing the new secretary ugh I wish he would see Iris is a real gem and he’s ruining her I swear when I seen those bruises I lost it.

I scoff as I’m walking past and keep my head high I will make him regret hurting my Iris yes I love her have always had, the thing is when Lester came he stole her away from me it was always me and her since middle school but I can say she still treated me the same until a couple years ago.

I make it to the conference room and see lots of employees and some people who we are in business with.

I see Lester and his assistant walk in and I roll my eyes glaring how can he make her seem like she’s his wife more than assistant I watch as he pulls her chair out next to him and he smiles at her.

We are in the middle of the meeting when the door opens to reveal Iris and I swear it was a bright light behind her because wow she’s beautiful sexy all in one.

I watch as she struts in and takes a seat at the end of the table as Lester is at the other end, I see Iris smile a bitchy smile at Lester who looks mad ass hell.

Lester says,” Iris honey what are you doing here”.

Iris raises a brow and says,” oh Lester I’m here to work I don’t like staying home all day plus I do own half the company I helped build up but I’m not here for the hard work”.

Lester looks like a cat got his tongue I hear murmurs about how Iris is pretty and where has she been some even happy she’s back I know I am she always kept the business above water.

Lester says,” well honey what are you looking to do”.

Iris smirks and says,” wouldn’t you love to know I will be an assistant”.

Lester’s assistant Dana says,” uhm I’m assistant”.

Iris says,” did I ask you this is me and my husbands company I suggest you stay quiet and don’t worry because I’m not his assistant I’m Sean’s”.

Lester coughs and Iris smirks while I’m on cloud nine Iris stands up and walks to my side while I look up at her beautiful face.

Iris smiles and says ” we’ll see you all later and Sean will show me what’s needed to be done”.

Lester stands and says,” MEETING OVER”.

Iris giggles and I wonder where all this boldness came from but I like it, Iris hurries to grab my hand and we walk out blending with everyone leaving the room.

We get to my office and I wonder how she remembers where it’s at she hasn’t been here in years.

I close the door and see her take a breather calming down.

I say,” you okay”.

She spins around smiling like a crazy lady and says,” hell yea I’m fine this is just the beginning”.

I look at her and see she’s dressed how she used to be successful and sexy, confident everything she wasn’t when she’s around Lester.

I see her wedding ring gone and say,” Iris where’s your ring”.

She laughs waving me off and looks at the new one on her finger then says,” nice don’t you think and my actual marriage ring is at home I won’t wear something that feels like bricks on my finger”.

I raise a brow and she continues,” besides this ring is one I’m sure you remember look closely”.

I look and see it’s gold and red then gasp I remember that ring I smile and say

,” you kept it I’m surprised he didn’t throw it away”.

I bought her that ring on our college graduation I spent my whole months paycheck on it and let me tell you it was expensive worth 5k, it wasn’t because I asked her to marry me it was because she wanted me to promise always to be there for her.

Iris says,” I always kept it since it is special to me but anyways let’s get started on work what do you need”.

I smile and hug her for a long time then say ” I need you to go deliver these files to HR and then please go to the cafe and get us both a coffee”

Iris says,” anything special in your coffee”.

I smirk and say,” yea surprise me”.

She giggles grabbing the files off my desk and heads out as I watch her hips sway in the skirt she’s wearing.