Enslaved To Passion

1.

″Be gone and never let me see you again you disgrace!″ shouted words from my father after he saw me with my cousin who was visiting that week, as if it was my fault. The look in my father eyes made my eyes burn, it was a hatred I’ve never seen before, his jaw was clenched and his eyes was wide open staring deep into my soul I wanted to sit down on my knees begging him to not throw me out like this, I wanted his love back, but day by day the love perished all up to this very moment where it was gone. I should have known, I should have caught onto the warning signs, but I thought he’d understand that none of it was my fault, the mistakes, the hurt, the disappointment I’ve caused, none of it was because of my free will to be a rebel, but I’ve gotten this image and no one wants to look past it so what’s the point in trying to convince them all to.

My name is Elysia most people just call me El, I’m 16 years old, my pain started before I was even a teen, I don’t remember all too much since so much shit have gone down, and I am what some people may call ‘an unfortunate soul’ I was born into a loving family, too loving even, my mother always loved and cared for me until one day she just vanished. It was like my free-trial was over, she left when I was 5 years old, I cried for days hoping she’d come back, but she didn’t. 3 years later my father found me a new mother, and with her brought 2 older brothers, one was 2 years older than me the other 4, when I was 10 years old, Callum the oldest of the two called me and my second older brother into his room. ″Wouldn’t you two like to play a new super fun game?″ he said excitedly, I was happy and said yes, I loved to play with my brothers, Daniel my other brother smiled and said yes as well.

″Great! The game is called tower magic, first we all have to take all our clothes off and then we’ll make a tower″ Callum said ″What’s the fun in that?″ Daniel asked. ″You see, this tower is magic, as it says in the game when we do it it’ll protect us from evil and great a strong bond between the three of us″ Callum answers, Daniel seemed happy about that answer, I was young and didn’t really understand but I wanted to be close with my brothers so I went along, the things kids believe. ″So who’s at the bottom?″ Daniel asked, ″That’s another great thing about this game. No one has to be, I got an even better tower that we can create, the Eiffel tower!″ Callum says excited.

2.

Callum directs us, me on all four, Daniel in front and Callum behind me, Daniel and Callum are holding hands above me ″Open your mouth El″ Callum says and I oblige ″Daniel move closer″ he continues. Eventually Daniel’s none-developed tiny penis enters my mouth, and I feel something on my vagina, and slowly I feel pressure on it, Callum is trying to enter me. It hurts like hell and I want to scream but of course Daniels penis is in my mouth so I can’t, and I feel paralysed, I’m too young to understand what’s going on, but I know that I don’t like it.

Yet I still let them do what they’re doing, Callum is making noises and so is Daniel, I don’t have the privilege of doing so, Daniel is not holding back. We hear footsteps from outside the door, Callum gets off of me quick and puts on his pants again, and in comes my step-mother ″Elysia, what are you doing?!″ Callum shouts, with Daniels penis still in my mouth. Daniel pulls away from me quick again and he starts crying, I don’t know if it’s guilt, stress, disappointment or all an act but it puts me in a terrible light. ″What the fuck is going on in here?!″ Tina screams, ″Christian! You better get in here right now!″ she continues, Christian is my fathers name, he comes running in and sees me and Daniel naked, Daniel crying and me just looking horrified at them both.

I don’t understand what I did wrong, but the stress and the looks of disappointment from Tina and my father brings me to tears, I start crying and I run to the bathroom and cry, I look at myself in the mirror and gets reminded of my fathers eyes, I feel terrible. I stay in that bathroom for hours, I don’t even remember if anyone came and tried talking to me, from there I was scared to see that look of disappointment from my father, so I wouldn’t dare do or say anything that would upset my father, I didn’t tell him about the bullying, he only heard when I fought back, I didn’t tell him about how Tina’s brother commented on my butt and breast and how he made me feel his penis.

But he always heard how, I punched a kid for no reason, touched the boys and the girls in school for no reason, how I manipulated my teachers as well as my step-uncle to attempt to get with me, so I should have seen it coming; the disappointment, anger, disgust, worry. I have one person in my life who seems to feel for me, and who love me, the person who see me as something other than a whore, loser, easy, manipulator, lost soul, this person is the only one I trust, Freya.

3.

She’s an angel, loves everyone even the weird kid at the back of the classroom, and even the creepy guy at the bus stop, she always greets them with a smile, she did that to me as well when we first met, when I was 13, she shared her food when Tina didn’t want to give me any or when I was scared my brothers had done something to it, she took the blame for the unfortunate positions I always got put in, she never suffered any severe consequences as far as I know, the teachers believed her when she tells them the bullies hit her first and that her papers are 100% authentic, when I say that they all call me a liar, she’s been there when I’ve cried, had a panic attack, and when I needed to be calmed down.

1 year ago, Freya became friends with Jasmine, and since then things have seemed a little off, but as far as I could tell Freya and I were still best friends, we hung out, we talk and she was still there for me, but I don’t think Jasmine liked me, she was always pulling Freya away from me, and always asked her to hang out when I asked, she’d come up with lame excuses that kept Freya away from me, but despite that Freya still did her best to get into groups with me, invite me over and maintaining our friendship, but 4 months ago Freya started acting different, she still talked to me, but it was very surface level, rarely any invites or requests to hang out, and she’d been avoiding me. Jasmine seemed happy about all this, it was probably her doing, but I’d still like to believe that Freya and I are still very good friends.

I had a crush on this guy Victor, he’s handsome and sweet, he’s really tall and he helps whoever needs it, I’ve seen his little sister pick him up with his mother and he’s so gentle and kind to her, always smiling and he’s athletic as well as really smart, I’d love to get with him I told Freya about this crush as well, and she seemed supportive and encouraging, telling me I should go for it and that he definitely liked me too, I was still too scared to say anything so I watched from a distance, I saw how Freya suddenly became very talkative with Victor and so did Jasmine, he seemed to enjoy the attention and I was weirded out, after the interaction I found Freya and asked her what that was about ″Oh Victor? He’s just a goods friend...″ She leaned in closer and whispered ″You didn’t hear this from me but Jasmine’s got a little crush on him″ she smiled and winked jokingly, in that moment Jasmine came up an asked ″You’re not spoiling me secrets to her are you Frey?″ Jasmine laughed.

4.

″Maybe, maybe not″ Freya says and laughs the leave and a few weeks later I come to school and see Jasmine on Victors lap, Freya is beside them and seems unbothered by the fact that they’re together I even overhear her say that they’re an adorable couple and that she’s glad they found each other. I wanted to talk to Freya about what happened and why she didn’t say anything but I justified her actions and stay friends with her. 2 months ago we all got invited to a party, I was excited, it was my first party and I had so many hopes for it.

I showed up in a tight pink dress it was mid-thigh length, I had done a full face of make-up to enhance my prominent light green eyes and put my long strawberry blonde hair in space buns, for the first time in many years I felt truly beautiful I went to go get a drink, the bartender was really cute with his blond hair and grey eyes, I sat by the bar for quite some time and got a bunch of drinks, I couldn’t see Jasmine or Freya anywhere, I wasn’t even sure they were there but they’d told me they’d be here.

Another hour passed by and still nowhere to be seen, but a guy came up and sat beside me at the bar and started talking to me, he was very sweet, and there was some sort of familiarity about him, but my vision was blurry from all the drinks and at the time I didn’t know that this interaction would leave me in yet another terrible position, the guy bought me drinks, complimented me and at some point he said ″I can’t believe I’ve never tried to get to know you″ I just drunkenly giggled I didn’t really know what he meant. ″Elysia, you’re really beautiful you know that?″ he said with such kindness and honesty, I leaned in wanting to kiss him but I must have passed out I woke up to being carried in his arms not feeling well ''Who...'' I tried to speak but the room was spinning.

''Shhh... You're okay El'' he said, still carrying me, I passed out again and woke up in a bed, the guy on top of me. ''No...'' I said quietly, I felt him insert himself into me, and kept me in my place, he kept going getting rougher and rougher ''You're so easy Elysia, all the rumours were true'' he said while pounding me, I fell in and out of sleep and don't remember much, last thing I remember is waking up in that same bed panties off dress pulled up past my hips and silence, despite the sickness and sadness I got up as fast as I could, put my panties back on and I sprinted out of there, it was bright when I came outside, I threw up on the grass, and rung my father.

5.

My father came and picked me up and took me home the car ride was silent, I was sick, and I knew what had happened so I knew that if I told him about it, he'd be disappointed in me yet again, so I got home, showered, changed my clothes went to my room locked the door and cried, I cried so hard, I felt so terrible, yet another had taken advantage of me, this was the 7th time, I cried for hours and had no energy, I didn't pick up my phone, I didn't let anyone in and I didn't eat, I went to school eventually but I felt numb, I had no idea what anyone said to me for 2 months I felt lost, sad, angry, numb, I felt everything but nothing at all.

One day my father knocked on my door saying that my cousin would be staying over for a week, at the time he arrived I was some kind of alright, I was okay enough to greet him it's been years since I've seen him, he slept in Callum's old room, Callum got sent to boarding school at 16 because Tina found some concerning evidence on his computer, child-porn. After that she didn't want him home anymore, so she arranged for him to get an apartment in hopes he'd become better, and of course she blamed me because of what happened when I was 10.

Daniel still lives at home, but it's like he wasn't, he was barely home, always out with girls, or partying and if he was home I'd only see him in the kitchen and hallway here and there he barely looked at me. My cousins name is Lukas, he lives around 2 hours away from us, and he's got some interview in our town so he was staying over until it's been completed, Lukas is 19 years old, he seemed to be in control and have his life together as well as seeming like a nice person, a few days after his arrival he asked me to come to his room, I went in there and he asked if I was okay. Those words almost made me cry, I held it back and answered ''Yes, I'm fine'' and faked a smile. He patted the space beside him in bed indicating that I should sit down, and so I did.

''I know we haven't seen each other in many years, but you can talk to me you know'' he said comforting, putting a hand on my thigh, I froze. ''You've gotten so beautiful'' he said through his teeth, he started moving his hand up my thigh closer to my vagina, I stiffened up and my body wouldn't move, I wanted to leave, but I couldn't.

6.

A tear fell from my cheek as he forced himself on top of me taking of my clothes, I tried to speak but I was locked in, my inside voice was screaming at me ″Move!″ ″Get him off!″ ″Elysia!″ ″Come on!″ he took off my pants and started to zip his own down, pulling his dick out from the zipper not taking his pants off fully and he inserted himself into me, and started using me as his personal pleasurer, a few minutes later I hear the door open, Lukas jumps off of me, and looked horrified at my father ''What in the world?!'' my father shouts. ''Mr. I can explain'' Lukas starts ''She told me that if I didn't do anything with her she'd make sure I'd never get the job'' Lukas lied, I looked at Lukas then my father, eyes burning and in a shaking voice I said ''Dad. Please...'' ''Put your clothes back on'' he said frustrated, but he didn't shout. I do as he says he hurries over to me, grabbing my arm tight and dragging me with him, he opens the front door and practically throws me out.

″Be gone and never let me see you again you disgrace!″ shouted words from my father after he found me in bed with my cousin as if it was my fault. The look in my father eyes made my eyes burn, it was a hatred I’ve never seen before, his jaw was clenched and his eyes was wide open staring deep into my soul I wanted to sit down on my knees begging him to not throw me out like this, I wanted his love back, but day by day the love perished all up to this very moment where it was gone. I should have known, I should have caught onto the warning signs, but I thought he’d understand that none of it was my fault, the mistakes, the hurt, the disappointment I’ve caused, none of it was because of my free will to be a rebel, but I’ve gotten this image and no one wants to look past it so what’s the point in trying to convince them all to.

My father leaves and comes back throwing a bag at me, I look inside and see all of the necessities, like clothes, a few bottles of water, some food, towels, a little bit of everything to survive as well as a decent sum of money, it looks like it's been ready for a little while. No way he could've packed all that in the matter of 5 minutes or less, I try to find comfort in the fact that he'd packed all this stuff to help me survive but it was difficult because the thought that he had been planning to kick me out eventually was really painful, I take the bag and go on my way.

7.

I have no one to turn to, where am I supposed to go? I don't have any family members that live close by and with that, who even says I can actually trust them? It seems like I can't trust anyone I am close with, except Freya. She hasn't betrayed me and I'm sure she won't she's been with me through thick and thin, she's my best friend, perhaps she'd let me stay with her until I find somewhere else to go. With that thought I make my way to her house, it's a bit of a walk but I don't have anything better to do.

It's dark and raining, I'm cold and wet, this is definitely going to give me a cold, I can't believe my own father would do this to me. Then again, he doesn't know what's actually been happening he just knows the ''My daughter's a mess'' part, I finally reach Freya's house after walking for 30 minutes, I knock on the door and it's Freya's mother ''Oh, Elysia, what happened?'' she asks concerned, I don't want to tell her the truth so I stay silent and try not to cry ''come inside sweetie'' Freya's mother says, just like Freya, Hannah is an angel, Hannah is Freya's mothers name, like mother like daughter as they say.

I get advised to take a warm shower and put on some clean clothes, after that I get called into the kitchen and Hannah have made some soup to keep me warm, she sits down with me and asks once again ''What happened Elysia?'' I look down in my soup and flashbacks plays in my mind, I try to think of something else since the memories is pulling me to tears. Hannah notices and say ''You don't have to tell me right this second honey, do you want me to call your dad?'' I shake my head saying no, I eat my soup and Hannah have gotten the couch ready for me to sleep ''How about you stay the night honey, Freya is already sleeping, you can talk to her tomorrow'' Hannah says.

I lay down on the couch and Hannah tugs me in, I fall asleep fast, it's been a rough day and sleep is desperately needed. I wake up to hearing voices in the kitchen it's Freya and her younger brother they're talking about some game, I don't want to interrupt, I hear footsteps coming down the stairs ''Good morning everyone'' Hannah says happy, I hear the footsteps move closer to the couch and Hannah shaking me gently to wake me up ''Freya honey, Elysia dropped by-'' Hannah doesn't even get to finish before Freya says ''You told her I wasn't home right?'' I look up at Hannah and she looks a little shocked ''Uhhh... Yeah.. of course.'' Hannah says awkwardly. ''Good, thank you mom'' Freya answers ''No problem, but do you mind me asking what happened between you two? Weren't you best friends?'' Hannah asks confused

8.

''For a time yeah, but Jasmine told me that if I wanted to be more popular I had top dump Elysia'' Freya says, ''Freya. you're actually choosing popularity over friendship?'' Ian asks confused. Ian is Freya's little brother, he's 14 ''I've gotten a lot more friends since meeting Jasmine'' Freya says ''Okay, but honestly, are they you're actual friends?'' Ian asks annoyed. I'm guessing Freya nodded because Ian continues ''So they don't just come to you to ask to 'borrow' some money that they in reality won't pay you back?'' Ian says. ''How do you know that?'' Freya asks confused, ''I read your diary, I know much more than you think I do'' Ian says casually ''IAN! That's invasion of privacy!'' Freya says angrily.

''You just gotta hide it better'' he says, ''Mom, you're going to say something about this?'' Freya says. ''Honey, leaving your best friend behind for popularity is a stupid decision, she doesn't deserve that...'' Hannah says with pity. ''Elysia is fucked up though, have you heard how many people she's been with, of all ages?'' Freya says frustrated. ''I can smell the jealousy on you Frey'' Ian says, ''I'm not jealous!'' Freya says strict. ''Freya darling, I'd advise you to not let go of Elysia, you have been friends for almost 4 years'' Hannah says.

I'm glad her and Ian is on my side, but it can't fix the pain that hearing your supposed best friend say that you're worthless to them have caused, I don't know what I can do now, I'm sure Hannah would let me stay until I've found somewhere else to be, but it feels weird having to hide from your best friend in her own house. ''You both got a screw loose'' Freya says and storms off. That's when I sit up from the couch and Ian spots me ''Elysia?!'' he says shocked ''Thank you for standing up for me Ian'' I say quietly I look at Hannah. ''I'm sorry about Freya dear'' she says looking away from me.

''It's okay Hannah, I should have known, ever since Jasmine she's been acting weird'' I answer. ''Yeah I've noticed it too sweetie, Jasmine is a bad influence on Freya, and she's a witch'' Hannah says slightly frustrated ''Jasmine's been to our house a few times and there's always some kind of mess left behind, Ian have even said that Jasmine's been rude towards him'' Hannah continues. ''I didn't know it was that bad, I'm sorry to hear that'' I answer back Hannah sighs and smiles ''See this is why I love you so much Elysia, feel free to stay here for as long as you need, but it's best to keep out of Freya's way'' Hannah says.

9.

''If you don't mind me saying, It's a little difficult 'hiding' when I'm in a family area'' I say ''Uuuh, you're right, you can't exactly hide if you're sleeping, and Freya does like to hang out in the living room.'' Hannah looks around and seems to be thinking ''What about the pool house mom?'' Ian asks. ''Good idea honey! Freya rarely ever goes to the pool house, since you made her believe it was haunted'' Hannah laughs and Ian laughs as well.

Hannah leads me to the pool house and gives me a little tour, I've rarely been here as well since Freya never wanted to go there, there's a thick mattress in a corner with some curtains in front and in the biggest room is a tv some, and a few pillows to sit on, it's really cosy and I can't believe why Freya wouldn't want to go here but I guess that made me lucky in this scenario. School is almost over, in only a few weeks I'd be on summer break, I still went to school but I've had to be extra careful since Freya couldn't see me, Hannah and Ian have been of great help.

I've been looking around for a job, since I know I can't stay here forever, and I'd have to earn enough to be able to move eventually, but with a job I'd have to quit school which I don't mind, since seeing Freya everyday knowing what she'd said is painful, I am looking forward for it to be over, and before I knew, school was actually over and I was thrilled, few weeks into the summer holiday I managed to land myself a job as a maid in a fancy mansion, in the rich part of town, the people I worked for is extremely nice and I am actually excited to go every morning and I love every hour I spend there.

One day when I came to work I was cleaning one of their many hallways I was in my own world and sweeping while walking backwards, I suddenly bumped into someone. ''Oh I am so sorry-'' I turn around and see a tall, muscular, handsome man ''-sir...'' I say with my mouth wide open he just glared down at me not saying a word, and just walked past me coldly, well that was rude, I haven't seen him before, but I definitely wouldn't mind seeing him again. I finished my shift and went back to the pool house, that man was spiralling in my head the rest of the night and I could barely sleep. I managed to fall asleep eventually, Hannah came to the pool house with some breakfast the next morning I ate it fast and went on my way, I couldn't wait to see him again.

10.

I got into work and started with my cleaning but I was distracted, couldn't help but looking around for him, I even went to the same hallway as yesterday to see if I could find him, after an hour or two I stopped looking for him and continued my work I was humming to myself while cleaning to make the time go by, I finished cleaning a whole 2 hours before my shift was supposed over, so I started snooping around, I know it wasn't ethical but I've worked here for about 3 weeks and haven't even seen half of this mansion, my curiosity got the better of me. I sneaked around looked at the decorations, paintings, statues, furniture it is beautiful.

I pulled silently in every door handle I came across, most doors was locked but the ones that was open I entered, one room looks like a dining area, there's a glass cabinet with a bunch of gold medals, and some gold framed pictures, I saw the guy in the pictures but couldn't find his name, I found out that he's playing a bunch of sports like lacrosse, ice hockey and basket ball, how does he keep up with it all?

I sneak out of the room again as quietly as possible and move onto the next one, no, that ones locked, this one as well. I finally pull a door that opens and it's a bedroom, it's pretty dark, I can barely see anything, I wonder if it's best I leave, but I decide that I can see enough and that there's no one in here. There's posters and framed pictures, the posters are from a band that I do not recognise, the pictures are of what looks to be teams, sports teams perhaps. Could this be the guy's room, but he looked old enough to live away from home, I find a bookshelf but instead of books there's magazines, newspapers, cologne, different products, a man who takes care of himself, I like that.

I hear footsteps in the hallway, shit. I look around for a hiding spot and settle for under the bed, the duvet is huge so it hits the floor all around the bed, so it's very secure and hidden, I crawl under making sure not to mess anything up, as well as staying quiet, footsteps approach the door to the room and I hear them walk in. My heart is raising, why did I have to snoop around, if I get found out I am in serious trouble. The person in the room is a man, he's talking to someone on the phone.

11.

''No I can't just kidnap her, she's done nothing wrong'' the man say, it's a deep but comforting voice. ''Okay, and so what? It's not like she'd put her nose where it doesn't belong'' he says after a moment of silence. ''Yes, I am aware what the last one did, but she had motives as she started, she admitted to it no?'' he asks slightly frustrated ''No you cannot interfere, it's suspicious that way, you're a stranger here'' he answers in the phone, he sits down on the bed, I hold my breath.

''Listen. I'm the boss, and I've seen her around, all she does is clean and makes weird noises and weird dances, she's as oblivious as a deer in headlights, there's nothing to worry about. Even though the gangs motto isn't exactly helping others, she looks like someone who needs it'' he says annoyed and sounds to hang up the phone. He lets out a sigh and lays all the way down on the bed, please don't get too comfortable, please don't get to comfortable I say in my head.

I lay still and I haven't heard him move, fucking dammit. What do I do now, I take out my phone and see that my shift ended an hour ago, I sent a quick text to Hannah that I've been held up and won't be back till late after that I shut off my phone completely and try to think what I can do. I find a pillow under the bed and decide that all I can do is just go to sleep, hopefully he'd be awake and out of the room as I wake up again. I fall asleep and wake up to a ring tone, I almost bump my head on the bed above because of the shock.

''Hello?'' he says with a tired voice ''Yeah sure, I'll be there, see you.'' he says and sounds to be hanging up, he lays in bed a few minutes more and then get up, take off his clothes and put on some new ones, as he opens the door I decide to take a peek. I only see him for a split second but he was wearing a beige formal shirt and some white formal pants, he looked so good. I listened after the departing footsteps and went out when everything got silent, I saw the clothes he had just worn on the floor and decided to pick up the shirt and smell it, so fresh and manly, I wish I could take it with me, I get a few more sniffs and after that I leave quietly and get started on work, once again.

I don't see him for the rest of the day, and I do my 8 hours of work, and leave, I turn my phone back on and see a few messages from Hannah the first one is an answer to my message which says ''Don't worry darling, I'll see you soon enough, stay safe'' the next one reads ''It's good you weren't here last night, Freya went into the pool house and saw the messy bed with new sheets and she asked about it, Ian told her that he sometimes likes sleeping in there because it's more peaceful''

12.

I get back into the pool house and Hannah is there waiting for me, she greets me with a hug and the sighs deeply ''Look dear, I wish I could keep you here for as long as you need, but it was a close call last night and as much as I love you, I can't bear the thought of how betrayed Freya must've feel if she ever found out that I was keeping you here and that she is the only one who didn't know.'' Hannah says upset, I look down feeling my heart sink, I don't want to put Hannah nor Freya through that even though she's been a bitch.

''I understand Hannah, I appreciate everything you've done for me, I couldn't have asked for anything better'' I say and force a smile. ''You've always been so understanding Elysia, but you know I could never send you out into nothing like that, so I've contacted Mr. and Mrs. Sinclair, and they'd love to be of help and offer you a room at their mansion, as well as some home schooling since you're still so young'' Hannah says with a smile. The Sinclair's are the ones I work for, I haven't spoken much to them, but I've seen them around and they always give me a smile and make sure I am okay.

I am sad over not having Hannah to depend on anymore, she's been like a mother to me, not only for the 2 months I've been living in her pool house, but also the times Freya and I had sleepovers at her house which was often, before Jasmine of course. The Sinclair's place is beautiful and it's easy to get back and forth to and from work, I start packing my stuff and Ian comes out to the pool house to say goodbye, he seems so sad to see me go and it warms my heart, never have I seen anyone being genuinely sad to see me leave.

Hannah comes back and gives me little box, as well as a bag with some snacks in it. In the little box is a gold necklace, the pendant of the necklace is a dove, and at the back of that dove is an engraving saying 'stay strong' I start crying reading that ''You didn't have to do that'' I say with a shaking voice ''No, but I wanted too'' Hannah says, I can hear she's trying not to cry. We all give one last hug goodbye and I take my bag and start going back to the mansion, when I arrive a woman I haven't seen before is waiting for me ''My name is Heather, it's so nice to meet you'' the woman says with a smile I smile back and she leads me inside.