Ryder’s Atlas

“Welcome to Dansburg, Colorado,” the captain says and something tightens in my core.

I haven’t been here in over eleven years, not once, since I left.

Since I left her.

This is a small town, so seeing her will be inevitable. Am I ready for that? I rub my wrist in comfort. I berate myself for thinking about her still.

Ding.

The seatbelt sign turns off and I grab my bag, glad for the distraction. I throw the straps over my shoulder enjoying the idea I’m getting off the flight.

I thank the flight attendants as I step off and walk through the airport ignoring the stares. Stepping out the doors, I smile wide as my best friend Vander steps up to me.

“Ryder Theroux in the fucking flesh,” he says patting me. “I’m still surprised you’re here.”

“Yeah, well Nanna threatened Theroux blood,” I say smiling.

We get into the car as he says, “Good, it’s been… what… ten years? It’s good to have you home. We all miss you.”

“A little over eleven,” I say looking out at the small town I left long ago.

“So how's life overseas?” he asks.

“Fine…” I lie.

“Girlfriend?” he asks.

I chuckle and shake my head. “Nothing serious. I’ve come to realize it’s not for me.”

“Hmm I wonder why,” he says smirking.

Always so perceptive, the idiot.

“How’s Wescott's?” I ask wanting to change the subject. Being here already does things to me. The last thing I want is to think about her more than I already do.

“Oh it's great. Andres manages it,” he says.

“Your dad’s alright with that?” I ask.

“Pops loves him, so yeah,” he says with a smile.

I clear my throat and say, “How are Andres and you?”

“We’re great,” he smiles. “You’ll see him at dinner tonight.”

I nod absentmindedly, staring as the scene passes but my thoughts stay on her. Alessandra Theodora Lascano. My Atlas. She moved to Dansburg with her uncle Andres when her parents died. Atlas is always on my mind if I’m honest. Somehow everything and everyone is compared to her in some way.

Grandmother's mansion comes into view and my heart is in my chest, but why? Because the love of your life lives in the same small town and she despises you in every way.

The car comes to a stop and Vander stares at me.

“What?”

He sighs and says, “Nothing. I’ll see you tonight.”

He’s being weird, but I haven't seen him in over eleven years so this might be a normal thing for him.

I give him a nod and step out of the car. Walking up the house my grandmother's butler, Dominic opens the door.

“Master Ryder,” he says.

“Hello, Dominic. Where is Nanna?”

“She is waiting for you in the study with your parents, sir,” he says walking with me.

I sigh and say, “Great they’re here.”

“Yes sir,” he replies.

I walk down the hall to the rising voices and stop when I am close.

“I don’t want her here, mother,” father’s voice rings from the study angry and almost in a shout.

“It’s not your birthday, Winston. I invite whom I please and I expect you to behave,” Nanna says softly. “It’s ridiculous I have to treat you like a child.”

“Mother, she is a vile wo—”

She interrupts him with a stern voice. “Enough. You have never bothered to give her a chance, instead you berate her every chance you get.”

Father grumbles.

“Alessandra will be here and that’s that,” she says her name and my heart soars in my chest.

“She better come alo—”

“I hope she doesn’t,” she snaps interrupting him.

“I’ll just make sure she leaves us alone, offer her money,” he says.

Nanna scoffs. “She’s never taken it before why would she now?”

He scoffs. “Why should she, she has you at her beck and call,” he says.

“You watch your mouth, Winston. This is your fault and when it blows up in your face, and it will, you are on your own,” Nanna’s voice is shaky and exhausted.

I’m vibrating with anger. I’m not sure what they are discussing, but it involves Atlas and clearly my father still harbors hatred towards her. Why he has always hated her, I’m not sure.

I walk in angry and say, “What’s your fault?”

“My nepot,” Nanna says, coming to give me a tight hug.

I hug her back, as her arms wrap around me. Nanna is a small little firecracker. She’s turning 80 soon and she still runs the Theroux household.

“What is his fault, Nanna?” I ask looking down at her.

She stares into my eyes, touching my cheek, and opens her mouth.

Father quickly chimes in, “You are under legal contract to stay quiet, mother.”

I squint at her. She gives me a small smile, then she sighs and says, “I’m sorry.”

I kiss her cheek and say, “Happy Birthday Week Nanna.”

“How was your long trip?” she asks.

“Tiring and long,” I reply.

“Son,” he says.

I turn in his direction and say, “Father.”

We stare at each other with the same animosity we usually do. It’s clear we have much to discuss, especially now that I know he’s hiding something.

“Where is mother?” I ask.

“She’s resting,” he replies.

I nod and say, “I will do the same. What time is dinner?”

“7PM,” Nanna says.

“Thank you Nanna, I’m going to shower and change.”

“Are you going to the Wescotts’?” she asks.

“Possibly.” I shrug.

She snickers and says, “Go rest, I love you.” She pats my cheek.

I smile and say, “Love you too.”

I walk to my room and into the closet, grab some sweats and shirt, then go into the bathroom.

My shower is long and with thoughts of her. Wondering how she’s been these eleven or so years.

I run my fingers through my long hair, letting the hot water soothe my thrashing heart.

Her memory flowing through me, calming every ache I carry…

…

“It’s my favorite thing about you really,” she says looking at my hair.

“It’s not my amazing motorbiking skills?” I smirk.

She breaks into laughter and says, “You have a lot of really good qualities, but the birthmark is one of my favorites.” She runs her fingers through my short scruffy hair. Her laughter does something to my soul. I feel alive.

“You like the skunk look?” I smirk.

She clicks her tongue.“It’s called poliosis and I happen to think it’s amazing. Unique.”

I give her a smile and whisper, “And your opinion is all that matters.”

“Plus, I bet if you let it grow out…”—she licks her lips—“I bet it would be really hot.”

I lean in to kiss her soft lips. I wrap my arms around her and she relaxes into me. She licks my lip asking for entrance. I groan… I mean who am I to deny her.

After a while of making out she pulls back and looks into my eyes.

“God you are so beautiful,” I say.

“I’m glad you think so…”

I lean in and say, “Mmmhmm,” before I devour her lips again. My hands trail up her smooth skin. Between my kisses I say, “Atlas. I want you right now.”

She moans and says, “We’re outside, but I really want you too.”

I pull her closer to me and the bike buckles. I place my feet flat on the ground as she gasps.

“I got you princess,” I say, holding her tight.

She leans against my chest and kisses my throat.

“Now show me how to ride this thing,” she says, patting the bike seat between us.

“You already know how to ride this thing…” I grin.

She breaks into a laugh, trying to cover her heated cheeks.

I give her a chaste kiss and say, “Whatever you want princess.”

…

…I groan coming out of the memory, the reason my hair is long. She was right then, the white birthmark is a magnet.

I turn everything off and realizing I’m anxious about seeing her tonight, I decide to go to Westcott’s.

I need a helmet, so I take a quick ride to Mats' Cross World to buy one. Before stepping out of the car, I see a few kids coming out of the store.

My eyes snap at one of the boys who has a white birthmark in the front right portion of his hair. My breathing picks up and I grip the steering wheel. I then touch my own birthmark, watching him walk away with his friends.

What are the odds?