Dissonance

Author's note: Please check chapter notes before reading.

Zoe

“So, the first song will be 'Midnight', then we present 'All You Need ', then-” my train of thought is interrupted by a hand on my shoulder. “Zoe, are you okay? You’re shaking…” I look up to see Mac; he looks nervous but is trying to conceal it for the band’s sake. I sigh and reply to him, “I’m fine… just, you know, general pre-gig nerves”. Riley smiles sympathetically. “Don’t worry, everything is already taken care of. I have a first aid kit in case any of us get hurt, snacks, and I talked to the manager twice to make sure everything is on schedule. There is nothing that can go wrong.” I don’t know why that makes me feel worse. I bite my tongue, not wanting to say anything that I'd regret later. Mac nods and gives me a sympathetic pat on the back. “We’ve all been there. But, you know what always helps me?” he pauses, trying to create tension for the ‘big reveal’. “Beer!” he says, over-excitedly and the band exchanges glances. Mei looks up from her phone after sending some messages to her parents. Her expression is serious. “Mac, we’ve talked about this-” starts saying before getting interrupted by Mac “Oh, come on, Mei! Let me live a little; this is our biggest gig yet! Let me celebrate with a little booze”.

Mei is about to reply when Riley, thankfully, changes the subject. “Anyway! Are we going to do the special song on the encore or not?” and with that question, all eyes are on Isa, who is caught chugging water while sitting on the keyboard. “I don’t think it’s ready yet…” she says quietly. “I don’t think we’ve rehearsed it enough…” Mei’s eyes soften, and she sits next to her. “I think it’s worth the risk”, but Isa shakes her head. “I don’t think it is… Mac said it before: this is our biggest gig yet; if I- we mess up, maybe they won’t call us back…” The room gets into an uncomfortable silence until a few agonizing minutes later, we hear a knock on the door.

“You guys are up in ten,” a staff member warns us. My heart starts racing, my hands are sweaty, but before I can start spiraling, I’m rushed by Riley to give my usual pep talk. I take a deep breath and start talking, “Okay guys, we’ve all worked very hard for this moment. All of you are incredible musicians, and I know what you are all capable of. Let’s rock the stage tonight”. All the members start cheering and getting ready to go onstage, but I feel a hand on my wrist. “Isa? What is it?” She stays quiet, looking hesitant. “You look off…” “I’m fine. I already told you, it’s just nerves.” I say. “You know you can talk to us, right?” Why won't she just drop it? “I know, pipsqueak.” I ruffle her hair. “You don’t need to worry about me.” I try to walk to meet the rest, but she stops me. “Communication is key in a band…” I’m not sure why that struck a nerve. “I told you I’m fine!” Isa seems to be taken aback, but there’s no time to apologize; the crowd is waiting for us.

Mei

I overhear the argument going on between Zoe and Isa. It’s odd; usually they get along very well. It’s not like Zoe to snap like that… I guess the pressure is really getting to her; being the leader of an upcoming band must be tough. I hate it when people argue, though; I had enough of that while convincing my parents to send me to America for music college. I know it was a hard decision for them; I mean, sending their child to another continent all by herself to pursue a career that is known to be unstable is tough. But this is the moment; performing is what I was born to do.

I present the band to the crowd, trying to hype everyone up. There are so many people, probably double the audience we usually perform to. I glance at the members, my gaze lingering on Isa. That girl tends to be the most nervous out of us… but she seems fine, even after the argument with Zoe. Huh, maybe I underestimate her; she has been growing thicker skin.

The show starts; Zoe seems to be quite affected. She messes up a few notes on her guitar riffs. Nothing major, really; if you don’t know the song as well as we do, it was barely noticeable. But I can see it weighing on Zoe, her eyes glistening with tears for a mere second, for her to blink them back and play with double the force that she usually does. I go and interact with her and the public, trying to calm her down. But as soon as she notices that eyes are on her, she starts sweating even more and playing her guitar so forcefully it was almost out of tempo… I decide to go to the other side of the scenario to bring attention to Riley. They pop off and hype the crowd up, and this seems to calm Zoe down a bit.

The rest of the show goes smoothly until the last song. And a thought came to me… Should I present ‘Tears’ instead of ‘I don’t need you’ as the last song? I know Isa said she didn’t feel the song was ready yet… But I really think it’s worth the risk. Isa is a great composer, and this song is so personal and powerful; the world really needs to hear it.

So, with a deep breath, I put the microphone in front of me, and I yelled, “Are you guys ready for the last song tonight?!” When I heard the roar of the audience, I decided it. They need to hear Isa’s lyrics, Isa’s voice. This is the moment. “I present to you guys our most precious song so far, written by our keyboardist… Tonight we close with ‘Tears’!”

Isa

“I present to you guys our most precious song so far, written by our keyboardist… Tonight we close with ‘Tears’!” What? Did I mishear? There is no way… Before I am given the chance to even process what just happened, I hear Mac’s drumroll. I glance around; all members seem to be so in sync. Did they plan this…? No, they can’t do that… I’m frozen in place. I don't know what to do. Riley gives me a worried glance. They have the nerve to seem worried about this when they planned to do this to me?

I hear the roar of the crowd, and I’m suddenly brought back to reality. We need to do well; I won’t embarrass myself in front of this many people. I didn’t take that medicine for nothing. So I started playing. For a moment, I stopped paying attention and focused on the music, on what I really want people to feel when they hear my songs… And before I noticed, the song was already over, and with that, the show was too.

…

“I can’t believe you did that to me!” I say as soon as we arrive backstage. “You all planned this, and for what? To make fun of me in front of a crowd?” Zoe tries to calm me down. “Hey, we didn’t plan any of this; we were just as surprised as you were”. I roll my eyes. “Oh yeah, you all magically were in sync without any warning, huh? Is that why you were so nervous before the show?! Is it because you all knew and left me in the dark?!” Mei opens her mouth to reply when someone knocks on the door.