There's Something About Her

The older lady ran throughout the flat as if trying to escape some sort of monster, screaming as she went. She had whipped cream covering her face, her eyebrows had been singed away from some sort of fire, a long stream of toilet paper stuck to her heel, what looked like ketchup on her nice business suit jacket and she was covering her right eye. She was running towards the front door where BTS’s manager stood with his mouth hanging open at the train wreck approaching.

“I cannot and will not do this anymore!” The lady shouted at him and charged out the front door, not looking back.

“Guys! Come here.” He shouted for the guys. They ran to the living room where their manager now stood. They all stood their trying to hide their smirks, all in a line.

“What just happened? This is the fifth assistant that has quit.... this month.” He said crossing his arms over his chest and eyeing each one of them.

RM spoke up first. “I mean... we tested her. She couldn’t handle the ... heat. She would not have been good to us in the long run if she was that easy to scare off.”

“I can’t help she walked into the cream pie I was carrying...” Jimin said and shrugged as if it were no big deal.

“I fell asleep with ketchup on me....I guess it looked like blood. She thought I was dead. So when she tried to wake me I may have or may not have screamed and scared her to death.” J-Hope grinned happily.

“You guys picked all the good pranks. I just put toothpaste in her shoes.” Jin said shaking his head.

“She backed up into my elbow... for real. I didn’t do it on purpose. I would have picked something better than that.” Suga says annoyed.

“I may or may not have toilet papered her room.” Jungkook says still smirking but looking down.

“Alright, V, what did you do to her?” Manager said looking at him warily.

V taps his chin and acts as if he is thinking. “Hmm, did she take her shampoo? I may have poured Nair (Permanent Hair Removal) in the bottle.” He said giving his boyish box smile.

The manager sighs and rubs his forehead. “Now I have to hire another assistant. This one... you won’t scare off as easy. I will make sure of that. No more pranks and or games with the next assistant.”

Each guy stood military style and saluted to their manager. Manager shook his head and a plan started to form in his head. He was going to hire an assistant that was more around their age and better prepared to handle their antics.

Manager left to his own apartment and placed an ad immediately. He didn’t want a ton of ARMY showing up just to be their assistant. He needed someone to focus and take care of their needs. Waking up on time, eating on time, taking care of their schedules in general. He thought for a moment and typed out his ad.

WANTED

A business assistant. 20-28 years of age. Must be fluent in both Korean and English. Must have excellent oranization and time management skills. Must have accuracy and attention to detail. Must have a calm and professional manner. Must have prior childcare experience. Open interviews to be held on Friday at 8:00 am. Please come prepared with references.