Coming Back Home

Putting a list of name and outfits for fashion week at Barkleys was easy . Getting everyone on the same page was harder . Everyone wanted to do something else and it was tiring .

After 3 hours Ansley gave up and left her home office for her bed . The house phone was ringing when she got upstairs .

Walking into her room she retrieves the phone and flops down on her bed .

"Hello ?"

"Ansley , your father still isn't doing well . I don't know what to do. His treatments are costing us a fortune . I'm scared , I don't know what to do ."

My mom says into the phone slightly sniffling , like she just got done crying .

She had known he was doing well , but had hope he would do better.

"Mom wha too you need me to do . I'll do anything you'll like ."

Even if it meant going back to the last place I wanted to be . But for my mom I would move mountains for her . She had done so much for me already that I owned her that much .

Heavily breathing and thinking to my self. But the last people I wanted to see was that evil witch and her son who would believe everything that women told him .But he was also the first person on my mind over the years . Just the thought of him finding out about them and mine and his mothers deal would break him .

He would hate me for keeping them away from him and would hate her for doing this to me . It wasn't any winning for any of us if he found out . If he hadn't did what he did when I wanted to tell him then we would be in a completely different situation.

I wouldn't have ran off to my aunt , and raised them by myself . Nor would I have had to stay away from my family . Shaking my head . Did i really wanna get into it ?

" I would like for you and the kids to move back here. I don't know how much longer he has . You don't have to worry about running into him you know . I found out that he had joined the Army after prom . That he also graduated early . He's turned his life completely around . He's a good boy with a bad taste in women ."

Me and mom couldn't help but chuckle at that .

"His mother is still here , but we don't have to worry about her . We can deal with her later . Owen just recently saw him . He lives on base. I think Fort Bragg now . He had a huge fight with his mother which made him move out . Oh and I bet Owen would love to see you . I know you miss your brother ."

Her bringing up him and his mother because i think she sensed my hesitation . I didn't know he had joined .

He was always talking about doing it . Glad he went though with it .

" I miss the kids and haven't seen them in a long time . Its long over do Ansley . I expect to see you in the next couple days okay . And better come around and tell that poor boy . No matter what his mother put us through or what had happened when you came back he deserves to know the twins ."

My mom hangs up before i could respond .

She always knew what i was thinking without me evening opening my mouth . Me and my mom are close . She knew me better than I knew myself .

But me and my dad were closer when I lived there .

Owen was mommas boy and i was daddy's girl . It was the opposite when we were younger but getting into middle should it switched . Thinking about the old days put a smile on my face .

Izzy barges into my room "Mom , when are we gonna see grandma and grandpa ? I miss them . But i miss uncle Owen more . He promised me bowling next time he visited ."

Izabella always seem to know when i was talking to her grandma . Without even asking who i was on the phone with .

She was close with her uncle than anyone else . And I knew she had Owen wrapped around her fingers . Even if he didn't want to admit it .

You could already tell . I hadn't told the kids that their grandpa had gotten worse. And i think it is about time that i did . Because I knew we would be moving back .

It was long over due and I was tired of following his mothers rules .

Ruffling her hair i told her "Go grab your brother and come here okay ." She nods her head and runs out of the room yelling for Beau . Five minutes later they both come barging into my room and jump on my bed .

"What's up mommy."

Motioning them to come closer to me and they both climb on each side of me . I don't know how they will handle this news . They're still young to understand what happened .

"There's something i need to tell you both ." They both scrunch their eye brows while nodding their little heads .

"Your grandpa has gotten worse . He's not doing so well , so we'll be driving up there to see what we can do to help him. But we might actually move there if things go the way I plan ."

Izzys the first to ask a question " What happened to him?"

Beau chimes in "We just talked to them last week mommy . Did something bad happened ?"

"Hes just getting older and gets sick a lot easier . He's not strong like you guys . He's weak at the moment and they don't know what's wrong ."

A tear slipped from my eye and Beau wiped it away ."What can we do to help grandpa ? " Izzy hugs me while crying. And Beau comes beside her and hugs both of us .

"Well be leaving tomorrow morning , so that we'll get to grandmas and grandpas house around night time okay . I want you guys on your best behavior okay . I know your guys birthday is a month away . So maybe we can start planning soon . A lot will happen in the next couple days okay . So bear with me and grandma "

I say rubbing their backs and kissing their foreheads .

"Will we see our dad?" Beau asked with curiosity written all over his face and innocence in his eyes .

Pulling Beau closer " I don't know buddy , i just found out that he's in the Army . And you know army people are gone all the time . But when the time comes and we do see him , remember its been a long time since I've seen him okay . And I don't know how he will react plus he doesn't know about you guys . You have a picture of him remember . And ill see if i can print you out a recent one okay Beau "

I had paused . I was always truthful with my kids . I never held anything back .

Izzy huffs "Not our fault , he's the one that hurt and left mommy . Why are you wondering if we'll see him .If he cared about mommy he would have checked up on her by now . You have a picture of him Beau , isn't that enough ." Izzy sounded irritated .

She had made up her mind that she didn't care for him when i had sat them down and explained to them why their daddy wasn't in the picture .

"Iz remember it was his mother that made me do this . Not him , but he never gave me a chance to explain ."

Beau hits Izzy in the back and yells "Maybe i just want to see if still look like him . Your lucky that you look like mommy and i have to look like him ."

Picking Beau up and putting him in my lap . He's getting to big for me to still be picking him up like this .

"It's okay Beau you don't have to yell , well its a good thing you look like him and not me . Just because you look like him doesn't mean anything . That's all you got from him . Beau you're your own person . And Izabella that's not how you talk to your brother ."

Izzy gets up and turns to me "I'm going to sleep okay . I love you mom , goodnight Beau ." Heading out the door she turns and closes the door slightly .

"Come on Beau climb in bed , you wanna sleep in here tonight ?" He shakes his head yes and climbs into the sheets . Doing the same , Beau scuts closer to me and puts his head on my chest .

Rubbing his head i could hear the shallow breathing and knew he was sleeping . He was the only one that still falls fast asleep once his head lays on my chest .

The maturity of my kids are different . For twins they are the exact opposite , and they have there moments .

Izzy was more mature than Beau . Beau took after me and Izzy took after her father it seemed .

Even with her looking like me , i could tell she was just like her father. Her attitude and the way she acts , even if she was mean to Beau she still cared for him and always makes up for it some how .

Beau took after me . Everything about him screamed me . He was soft hearted and he easily cried. When he acts tough , it was like any moment he would break . Even if he looked like his father , he was sensitive and slower learning and more caring .

Knowing that he was asleep i continued to rub his back to make sure he wouldn't wake up when i moved him . So I places him back on his pillow , kissed him on the forehead and headed to Izzys room to check on her. Closing her bedroom for after checking up on her . I headed to my office .

Turning on my laptop and heading to facebook , I couldn't help but search his name . His profile pulled up , but nothing about it really changed since the last time i looked him up.

Except this time his profile picture wasn't him in high school . But a more recent picture . It was him and my brother at the lake .

They both wore a smile that made you wanna smile too . I missed them , and the old us . We were inseparable , us against the world .

My brother and him continued to be friends after he had left town . He even got to see him when get was near our town . I told him to keep him in the dark .

I didn't want him to find out about the kids . Even if I didn't live in the same town anymore . I was always scared he would show up at my doorstep unannounced .

Searching for my favorite one of us . He hadn't deleted anything , everything was still here . All our albums and comments and posts .

Scrolling and finding it was easy , it was in the album for his junior year homecoming . We decided to do pictures at the last minute . They were taken at Old Mans creek .

The sun was setting in the back ground and we were sitting on top of the tree . Owen had said something funny and Tates head was thrown back laughing and i was starring at him with a small knowing smile on my face .

You could tell the love in my eyes . With the way I looked at him he was my whole world . And my main focus was all him nothing else mattered . We had fun that night . Everything about that night was perfect . I think that was the night they twins were conceived.

But it was the second from last time that i had seen him before i left town . He had done all the things he had promised me . And he didn't disappoint at all .

Thinking to myself about how dumb i was to believe him that night . But I don't regret nothing that happened . I wanted it just as much as he did .

Even if he was gonna leave me to wake up alone and confused about everything. He had left me after I had given myself to him .

Had I know he was joining the Army back then , I would have done everything differently . I would have done everything sooner . It was good that he joined the Army . His parents must be proud of him . Especially his mother .

Would he be happy to see me ? Would he care? Does he still love me ? So many questions flooding my head . Not seeing someone for over 9 years , would memories and feeling resurface?

Getting up and turning off the light i went to head back to bed . I lay down and turn off the side lamp . Before i know it i was falling asleep and floods of memories filled my head. Hoping tonight i would have a rememberable dream .