30 chapitres lus
Paranormal Twins
"This is wonderfully written. When will there be a second part "
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30 chapitres lus
Paranormal Twins
"Great book with a cliff hanger."
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30 chapitres lus
Thanks 😊
"Nice story "
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30 chapitres lus
Enjoyment
"I am enjoying this book. I like how the chapters go from Jay to Jakki showing us both points of view. your writing and Grammer are on point. I am hooked not wanting to put my phone down"
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29 chapitres lus
Disregard this Review if you don't like it: Just my opinion...
"This book is good, you're writing skills are a lot better than a novice writer's. I recommend using Grammarly for spelling mistakes and for grammar mistakes. The plot is an amazing start, it's like a story that needs a crutch, meaning it needs a book two."
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30 chapitres lus
PARANORMAL TWIN: THE NEW BEGINNING
"Hi Author Aiden, ahm how are you? hope all is. I liove your story hoping for the 2nd book of it? to come up waiting for it. Thanks.."
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30 chapitres lus
PARANORMAL TWIN: THE NEW BEGINNING
"Hi Author Aiden, ahm how are you? hope all is. I liove your story hoping for the 2nd book of it? to come up waiting for it. Thanks.."
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30 chapitres lus
Nice story
"Hi Aiden, I read over your supernatural story in ONE sitting and I must say it is impressive. But before I start with the technicalities, I'll tell you what I liked about your story first. Your summary is well written. I was immediately attracted to your story by it. Your plot is interesting, I liked how this is about twin siblings who learn to appreciate each other despite their different lives. Each character feels real and can be differentiated by their real human qualities. I do admit I did have a bit of trouble trying to differentiate Jay and Jakki from one another so like one of your reviewers mentioned, it would be nice if you can give them their own unique style of speech. The human qualities are good, but the speech sort of sounds the same, so work on that if you please. Now for my criticism, you already have received a bit from above, but let me state that you have a few grammatical errors here and there, but its very minor and you can fix them easily. Generally, the story was rather smooth, so it wasn't exactly a problem for me personally. For your blurb, Jay had a nice life. No one cares. Why does he have a nice life? I mean, I get that you are trying to start out your blurb sort of like how some authors do this, but it gets old and no one cares and only want to be fascinated, so work on that and you will get a bigger audience. As for your prologue, it is supposed to support your story overall. I think your story could even lose the prologue because it doesn't exactly support your story and plot. It seems like something for book two material. Unless the prologue took place before all this happened, it would actually make sense. But from the context I'm given, it doesn't seem like it is or is clear enough so if you could fix that, your readers would understand what is going on more easily. Otherwise, I'm pretty satisfied with your vampire, werewolf, lycan, and all those wizard elements you have in the story. It has this fair depth of technicality that is easy for your readers to digest."
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30 chapitres lus
More
"I really enjoyed the story but want more. Is there more?"
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0 chapitres lus
suspenseful story
"Hi Aiden, I read the first couple of chapters of your story ☺ First of all I want to say good job on creating suspense, I read through it all in one go! I do think, however, that maybe you go a bit too fast with your story. You start your novel with a very dramatic, chaotic scene. After a few paragraphs the reader finds out that bodies are lying everywhere… what happened? What sounds did we hear? What screams, what smells? Was there smoke? Or was there perhaps a deadly, scary silence? Throughout your novel you can use such small descriptions to add more depth to the story. You alternate between the voices of Jay and Jakki. This makes it definitely more interesting to read, but one thing I am missing is distinctions in the language that you use for these characters. These are two different people, so try writing in two slightly different styles. That will make the characters more credible. I think you’ve got quite a strong plot here, so I hope my points can help you improve what you’ve already got!"
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