Chapter 1
FLORA
He stood behind me, pushing his body into mine, running his large hands over my back. Slowly, they moved, from my waist up and up, until they reached the spot between my shoulder blades. Then his hands broke apart, resting on my shoulders, while his black, scaly tail curled around my waist. And he pulled me back. Pressed me against him.
His touch left my body covered in goosebumps. Oh, how I loved it when he was this close to me.
He was the first thing on my mind when I woke up and the last thing before I fell asleep. Even in my dreams, he would come to visit me and do all sorts of things he couldn’t do in real life. And I would drown in those black piercing eyes and lose myself in the grip of his strong arms. I would trace his pale skin with my fingers if he allowed me. I would run my hands through his long, silver hair. I would smell him. Taste him. And he could do whatever he wanted.
But those were just dreams.
“Do you think I can’t see—can’t feel—the need in you?” he whispered into my ear, his hot breath fanning across the back of my neck. “It’s a need that I can fill... I know that. And you know it too, Flora.”
Flora. My Flora. Little Flora. Beautiful Flora.
Hearing my name falling from his lips would never bore me.
His hands caressed my shoulders, pointy nails tracing my collarbones, before his long, pale fingers wrapped around my throat. He was gentle. He was always gentle, even though the man was a demon, and demons were usually never such gentle creatures.
“You feel safe with me,” he went on. “You like to talk to me, like to hear all my stories. You want to know everything about me. Don’t you?”
A growl filled my ear.
Lord Ambrose Black could growl so loud the porcelain in the cupboard would shake, but this time it was a low rumble. I felt his arousal nudging against my back and gasped because of it.
“Answer me,” he demanded.
“Yes. Yes, you’re right. I feel safe with you. I like to talk to you, listen to you. And I like your s-stories as well,” I replied, my breath hitching.
Wavy locks of silver hair fell in front of my face. I could smell it. Honey and almond.
“But you want more than stories, don’t you? You want to make new stories with me.” He let out a chuckle and slowly caressed my neck. “I already know you do, but I want you to say the words out loud.”
I swallowed, not wanting to admit out loud that everything he’d just said was true. It wasn’t because I was scared of him or the truth of his words; it was because I wasn’t allowed to give myself to him.
I couldn’t. My body belonged to someone else.
“I can’t give you what you want.”
“Yes, you can.” His hands let go of my throat and rested on my shoulders again, but it wasn’t as intimate as it was a moment ago. “You want it. I can sense you do.”
“I’m a married woman.”
"A married woman, she says...” Ambrose scoffed. “John will not come back. He has been gone for two years—disappeared during that trip. His body has become one with the sea, Flora. And here you wallow, fearing they will condemn you to Hell if you give in to your desires. If there is one person who will go to Hell, it is me, and that’s not because of my lust for a woman’s flesh!” This time, the growl he released was deep and loud.
“W-what do you mean, my lord?”
“Never mind.” He sighed, making the hair on my head tickle. “Forgive me for raising my voice. The fact of the matter is that your husband is dead.”
“I’m not sure he’s dead. Sir Harold has ordered me to wait another year before John can be declared dead, and then I can have my status of widow.”
“These are silly rules that make no sense. And Sir Harold is nothing but a simple-minded pigeon,” he replied.
Sir Harold was an angel, but my lord always referred to angels as pigeons.
“Besides that, you never loved your husband. He treated you like filth,” he added. “You have told me that yourself. You even wept when you did.”
“That doesn’t matter. I can’t give you what you ask of me.”
“You have already given me things, though.”
I swallowed. My heart beat faster and faster.
“What?” he asked, caressing one of my ankles with his tail. “Did you think I didn’t notice? I did. And I appreciate all the little things you give me. I know that button didn’t stay unbuttoned this morning by accident. I know it’s you giving me these offerings, these little gifts. Things you show only to me and no other man. You do it because you know it pleases me. You want to obey me. So forget the rules and serve me, my Flora. Let me train you. Let me set you free.”
“I can’t,” I replied once more. “Adultery is against the laws of the angels.”
“You will not go to Hell for it.”
“You don’t know that.”
“Maybe I do know,” he whispered. “Maybe I’ve seen Hell.”
“You can’t. Demons aren’t allowed in Hell. That’s why they’re here on earth. Don’t tease me, my lord.”
He took a deep breath. “Then tell me you don’t want me. That you wouldn’t love to hear my commands to open those thighs or to get on your knees and suck my cock until you are rewarded with my seed spurting down your throat while my tail fucks your cunt until it creams.”
Holy gods. As a married woman, I should not listen to such obscene words! But they set my body on fire.
I wished I could.
“I—I will not say that either,” I choked out.
He let out a soft grunt before he answered, “I know. You’re not a dishonest woman. And not a liar either.”
He was right. I might be a coward in life, and I might be stupid, always thinking of others before thinking of myself, but at least I was an honest person who could sleep without guilt. Or better said: without too much guilt.
“That’s why I want you so badly, Flora,” he said. “That’s why I feel so much desire for you. You fascinate me. And you’re fascinated with me just the same. Aren’t you?”
I nodded.
Lord Black could have taken me if he wanted to. The man was not only a demon but also filthy rich, and there was no way something would happen to him if he used me and disposed of me. But he had never crossed the line I had drawn between us. Not once. He treated me better than my own husband had ever done.
“You dream of me,” he whispered.
I closed my eyes. “Every night.”
“You want to spend every minute of every day by my side, because that makes you happy.”
“Yes.”
“But, Flora...” He licked my neck with his forked tongue, and I would have fallen down if he hadn’t been holding me. “You know it’s all give and take in this life. Nothing comes for free. Not even in relationships and connections. There is only one unconditional love in this world, and that is the love between a parent and their child. That is the only selfless kind of love. Everything else comes with conditions—with a price.”
“I—”
“I wasn’t finished.” He turned me around and looked into my eyes. “You want to be with me because you love my company, love our conversations. My sister wants her husband because he has money. Some want their lover because they make them laugh. Others want them for their smart brain. And you know what my price is if you want to spend your life with me, Flora. I want your full obedience in the room.”
The room. Also known as his “playroom.” I had seen it once, and what my eyes had found there had left me in shock and fascination. It was fuel for my daydreams.
I swallowed. “But why must you ask me this in return?” I asked. “When you know I can’t give it to you? Don’t you like to spend your time with me?”
The lord and I always spent one hour a day together. One hour, somewhere between dinner and bedtime, where we talked about all kinds of things. And he would teach me things, listen to me, and laugh with me. The hours we’d spent together were the happiest hours of my life.
I knew he liked to be around me as much as I liked to be around him. Why wasn’t that enough? Why couldn’t we be friends until the time came for us to be more?
“I do. But I need more. And your obedience is what I want,” he replied. “And I know it would make you happy as well. You long to please me, to serve me in other ways than you already are.”
“But if I can’t give you that?”
“Then you can’t have all of me either, Flora. You can’t use me for your own desires and not give anything back to fulfill mine.”
“But talking is not the same as being someone’s naked—naked”—I searched for the right word—”slave for your debauched sinful mind.”
“Don’t speak to me like that, Flora.”
“I’m sorry,” I said, looking at his chest. I shouldn’t have said that. I was a servant in his home. He treated me well.
“And I don’t want a slave,” he growled. “I want you. Your need to serve me is the greatest gift you could ever offer. There is always a choice inside the room. A slave has no choice. I don’t want slaves.”
“Still... I can’t, my lord...” I said again, shaking my head. “I want it, but I can’t."
This was the first time I’d said I wanted him, but he ignored me. Instead, he took a step back, making me feel cold.
“I will not force you,” he answered. “You may leave my room now, please.”
I didn’t like this feeling. I didn’t like that he felt unsatisfied because of me.
“I... I can send Kitty over, if”—I swallowed away the lump stuck in my throat—“if that pleases you.”
“Kitty?” he asked, his eyebrows frowning.
With tears welling in my eyes, I answered, “Yes, my lord. Kitty.”
Unmarried Kitty, who often walked around with bruises on her neck and a smile on her face. It was not spoken about out loud, but every servant in this house knew she sought comfort in the lord’s bed. Oh, how I hated her. But I could hardly expect him to not be involved with other women, if I couldn’t give him what he desired.
“Is she in need of me?” he asked.
“No, but I thought that you—”
“You think I want her now because I cannot have you? You pity me, Flora?” His eyes flickered with something that looked like irritation.
“No, no! I mean...” I looked at the ground, tears rolling down my cheeks. I felt so stupid and weak. “I care about your satisfaction, my lord.”
“Just leave, Flora. Go to bed.” He let out a deep sigh. “I am alright. Good night.”
The clipped tone of his voice made me feel even worse. “V-very well, my lord.”
This is the unedited version. You can find the improved version on Amazon Kindle, completed!
