Prologue
Alena was so excited. The school her so called parents dropped her off at was talking about letting her start college classes in three weeks when she would turn 18. Sure she missed her friends and boyfriend back home but it had been almost a year since she had seen any of them. She knew it would be ridiculous to even assume she would go home and see them again. She was interrupted from her thoughts when Ms. Ashley told her Ephraim, her counselor, wanted to see her. It was strange but maybe there was a development in her starting college even earlier than she planned. So there was a bounce in her step as she walked to the gate to wait on Ephraim. Even stranger he was waiting at the gate for her to arrive with a tight sad smile on his face. What the heck is going on Ephraim never looks like this, she thinks to herself. Still she waves to him, “Good Morning Ephraim! I didn’t know we had a meeting scheduled today.” She says cheerfully as she walks up to him.
“Alena, there have been a few developments on your future that we need to discuss. Come on we can talk in my office before we have a unscheduled call.” Ephraim didn’t seem as happy as usual when they spoke of the future. This terrified her and she started to chew on her nails as they walked to his office. Normally she would sneak glances at the boys running around this side of the campus and chatting with Ephraim. He notices her nervous habit and places a hand on her shoulder. “Lena I know your nervous but I promise to explain everything as soon as we get inside. Take a breath.” She smiled as he used her nickname not many around the campus would use it even though it was just dropping an A from her name. He must be trying to calm me down if he’s using it outside of the office. This is not going to be good news. Her mind was going a mile a minute to try and figure out what was happening. It was a short walk to the office however and she immediately went and sat in the bean bag chair she loved. As funny as it sounded this chair would calm her down and actually helped with her extreme anxiety. If she ever left she would have to remember to buy one.
“So what are we talking about? Can I fill out the paperwork for BYU yet?” she smiles hoping this is all he wanted to talk about, “or maybe the loan paperwork can be started?” Her smile falters as he slowly shakes his head no.
“I’m so sorry Lena I know we started planning college and your excited but you will not be attending Brigham Young University from our campus. I just spoke with Michael” tears start falling from her eyes at the mention of her adoptive father, “Hey now don’t cry this can be good news Lena.” He offers her tissues and places a hand on her shoulder his version of comfort. “Listen to me Lena you finally get to return home. You’ll see your friends and family again. Don’t you want to see Bekah?”
She shakes her head “I-i-I don’t want to go home. I like it here.” She manages to say through the tears. “Please tell me I don’t have to leave. I’m making progress and actually have a positive influence in my life.”
He sighs, “ you’re still a minor Lena. You will be graduating in one week. I’m sorry they are pulling you out 15 days too soon for you to decide your own fate. Let’s look at the positive and how you will be back with friends and family soon. Now we have to do a family call, ok?” she stands and walks to the computer as she dries her eyes.
“fine let’s get this over with.” She says softly. The phone rings and is picked up rather quickly.
“Hello” a young girl answers.
“Hey there Bekah.” She says happiness swelling in her heart with the sound of her baby sisters voice.
“Sissy!” the little girl squeals. “I miss you. Daddy says your all better and coming home soon.” Another click let’s her know someone picked up another line.
“Alena did Ephraim inform you I will be there on the 31st to pick you up” a gruff voice says on the other line.
The happiness she felt at the sound of her sisters voice leaves as quickly as it came when she hears Michael. “yes sir.” she says trying to sound happy as all her plans shatter around her. Just a month ago she was informed that she wouldn’t be coming home and could continue her education at the campus. Now she would have to go home and endure the emotional and mental abuse she spent a year recovering from. This was the worst possible thing she could think of. She was doing good. Yeah she still thought about cutting but she didn’t act on it. She still wrote poems about it but wasn’t hospitalized because of her writings anymore. Now she was being pulled from her safe place and back into what she considered hell.
“Did you hear me Alena” Michael sounded pissed how long did she zone out into her mind?
“n-n-no sir. I-i-I’m sorry I got caught up in the e-e-excitement of c-c-coming home.” Damn I’m stuttering again. This is bad. Ephraim looked over worry written on his face.
“He was explaining he would pick you up on the 31st and there would be a small graduation ceremony for you here before you leave.” Ephraim explained softly.
“Understood sir.” She replied to Michael. “Is that all?” she was ready to finish this call.
Michael grunted goodbye and Ephraim hung up the phone. “how are you holding up Lena” he asked softly. Her only response was the tears she held back during the call falling down her cheeks. How can my life fall apart so quickly. I cant run away it’s the desert here. She shook her head wiping the tears from her cheeks and eyes. “Im fine Ephraim thank you for everything.” She stood and walked to the door, “can I go back to my tutoring please?”
He nodded and took her back. She spend the last week of her time on campus tutoring and exercising as much as possible. It passed too quickly for her liking and before she knew it she was standing in the English room waiting to be presented with her diploma. A small sad smile on her lips as she hugged her teachers goodbye. After the small ceremony she was given she walked towards him, her adoptive father, here to fuck up her life once again. She cried as a few friends came up and hugged her goodbye. Once they left he turned to her. “time to go can’t miss the flight home.” She nodded unable to trust her voice. The ride to Las Vegas Airport was quiet. She didn’t want to talk to him. She never did. Michael and her boarded the flight and she cried as she watched the plane take off and leave her hopes and dreams on the ground.
“You will get a job when we get back and I expect you to be free to watch your sister whenever it is needed” he said before going to sleep as she simply and quietly watched the plane fly though the air. As soon as the plane landed she was rushed to the car. When they finally arrived back home her neighbor was just getting home from school. He grinned at her and ran up “Hey I’m Dougie wanna be my friend?” he says as she runs into his arms. He was her oldest and best friend. “You ok Lena?” he whispered. She nodded not sure she could trust her voice. “Chin up girly My mom has been waiting to see you. Has a graduation party already planned for Saturday. Come on let’s chill at my house.” He pulls her towards the house next door.
Alena stops him, “ I just got home Doug. I gotta change into real clothes not this shit they have had me wear for the last year. And plus I haven’t seen Bekah yet. I’ll be over later, ok?” she smiled at him. He shrugs and walks towards her front door.
“I’m coming with you. Kids don’t get home for a half hour and you don’t need to be alone with your folks ok?” He grabbed her hand and walked in like he owned the place heading up the stairs to her room. He stood in front of her closet and threw clothes at her. It was her favorite outfit and today was nice so she could wear it. She slid her pants off and put on her skirt. It was a beautiful black and purple plaid. He held her black tank out. As she took her shirt off and grabbed it putting it on. “thanks” she said softly. He was staring at her and it made her a bit uncomfortable he never did that before. She sat on her bed next to her best friend and her brother laying her head on his shoulder. “I’ve missed you and ur brothers. Hell I’ve missed all my friends.” She confessed to him. “But I never thought I’d be back here. I was gonna start college there and never look back on Patricia and Michael. I’m so scared to be back Doug.” She didn’t mean to but it all just came out. She felt safe sitting next to him.
“you can still manage to go to college Lena. And hey you can’t just forget about me.” He placed his arms around her and kissed her forehead. “I told Dan, Krys, and Kyle you were coming home. They expect you to call them. I got their numbers if you need em. Told them about your party too. They will be there as will a few of your other friends. You should have seen the looks when I went up to talk to the guys they were freaked out.” He laughed.
Lena cracked a smile at the thought of his hick-ass walking up to her punk friend and crossdressing boyfriend. “I can only imagine especially since at school we barely talk. Thank you for telling them.” She paused “is Dan still my boyfriend?” she got worried it had been a year.
He handed her his cell phone the number already programmed in to call. “lets go to our fort in the woods and you can call them ok?” he stood up pulling her to her feet. “figured you would want privacy for the call and I did some renovations to the place while you were gone. It’s not all rusty anymore.” He laughed as they took off at a run to the little fort they built years ago out of whatever they could find. She pressed call when they arrived and waited for Dan to pick up.
“Hey man did she arrive?” it was the first time in a year she heard his voice. She didn’t know what to say she was at a lost for words. “Come on man tell me she’s ok and her asshole pops didn’t cause too much drama.” Tears started falling down her cheeks.
“No he didn’t start anything. And yeah I’m home. I’ve missed you” her voice was soft and unsure.
A sigh of relief sounded on the other side. “You in the hide away?” He asked quickly with the sound of his jeep starting.
She nodded “yeah me and Doug are here. But I got to go home soon and see Bekah.”
“Don’t move I’ll be there soon she can wait. Believe me she is just like your mother completely ruined if you ask me.” He sighed. “please wait I need to see you” and with that he hung up.
She waited and spent the rest of the day with her two favorite boys. Forgetting about all the drama of being home or anything other than her friends.
It was Saturday already. Alena managed to secure a job and got her drivers license the day before. Doug’s mom pulled her over to the house early that morning to have her get ready. Doug had picked out the perfect dress. A 1950’s vintage black and purple maxi dress. It was 100% her. She was banished to the basement with the boys until it was time to get ready but she loved every second. When she went to change she could hear people upstairs arriving. She did her makeup and got dressed quickly. It felt good to wear actual clothes and makeup again. When she emerged from the bathroom the basement got quiet. Everyone staring at her in awe.
“Shit when did Lena turn into a girl!” Jeff the second youngest exclaimed making Lena look down blushing as Doug smacked his younger brother. Dan came up and grabbed her hand planting a kiss on her cheek. “You look amazing.” He whispered.
They were called up a minute later. “As y’all know we are here to congratulate the first of the 06-07 graduates and welcome her back home. Lena we are all so proud of you.” Doug’s mom comes over and kisses her cheek. “You look beautiful sweetie.” Lena smiled and glanced around the room. She saw some family, all her friends and neighbors but not her adoptive parents or Bekah. She knew Dan had been correct when he said she changed. Life was all about what Bekah could get and not about the fun you could have with those you care about. It was upsetting to see the change but now was not the time to dwell on it.
Lena let all the stress of home drop from her and laughed and partied with her loved ones. It was one of her most precious memories. Everyone had a great time and it was late when the last person left. Doug suggested that she sleep over like she always used to and they stayed up watching action movies in the basement.
“the hell is going on here” woke Lena and Doug up the next morning. Apparently Dan had arrived to take her out and found them laying asleep together on the pull out couch that was Alena’s when she stayed over. Lena’s head was on Doug’s chest and his arm around her.
“Morning. Sorry we must have fallen asleep watching movies.” She said sitting up and stretching. Doug didn’t say anything but got up and started coffee not affected by the upset man standing in his basement. Lena stood and walked towards her boyfriend and went to kiss him when he pushed her away.
“Fuck you both “ Dan said, “we’re done Alena I can’t accept you sleeping with him”
“Dude she sleeps here all the time.” Doug went on the offensive immediately. “plus she’s family it’s not like we would fuck, but she’s too good for you get the fuck out of my house.” He started towards Dan his hands balled into fists. Dan turned his back and ran out of the house. “Well that was fun.” Doug laughed, “Come on we need coffee.” He pulled Lena to the bar and set a cup in front of her. “Drink up I know you need this. And don’t worry about that fuckboy you don’t need him.” He smiled at her taking a drink of his own coffee. Lena simply nodded. She assumed that Dan wouldn’t wait for her anyways but she never expected to be thrown away just because she fell asleep at a friend’s house. Maybe Doug was right and she deserved better than a boyfriend who would steal all her cute clothes.
“So it’s almost noon. Guess it is better Dan than your mom or dad waking in on that. God knows we would have had pictures taken before the bed being flipped over to wake us up.” She laughed. They had plenty of embarrassing pics from throughout the years. Hell she could fill two scrapbooks up with crazy and embarrassing photos. He laughed knowing she was telling the truth.
“Don’t forget the freaked out pic of the bed flipping and us waking up” he smiled. “Sorry about Dan.” He looked down. “I didn’t mean to fall asleep.”
Just then the door opened and his mom, Berta, came down the stairs. “what was that all about kids?” the only answer she got was the two of them laughing causing her to roll her eyes. “Lena I spoke with Mike and Patti they said if you wanted to you can move your things here and call this home. You know we wouldn’t mind and I’m sure you would be happier. I can set up an extra bed in Doug’s room or you can take over the downstairs. Why don’t you think it over and let me know at dinner.” She smiled at them.
“I’d love to move in if that’s alright. I start working tomorrow so I can pay y’all the rent I was going to pay Michael and Patricia.” Lena smiled looking at Berta. “you really don’t have to change anything I’m more than happy to sleep on the couch and remake it in the morning.”
“Rent? No sweetie this has always been your home there’s not going to be any rent. Now go over there with Doug and get your stuff. We can clear out half of his closet so you can hang your things up.” She smiled at them. “Doug your going to help with the move correct.”
He nodded before she went upstairs. “talk about life changes.” He laughed. “Lets go get your shit and move it over here.” He got up and she followed him to Michael’s house one last time.
It took all day but finally they were done getting everything moved. Lena was happy about this change. At least she wasn’t going to have to sleep under the same roof as them anymore. It wasn’t until they were moving the last box she noticed the familiar white Silverado at the neighbors house. She froze staring at it. “Doug what is he doing at your house?” she whispered pointing to her ex fiance’s truck.
“oh he’s just parking it he’s over at Chris’ house but there was no parking. You ok?” He put his arm around her protectively. He knew something happened but she only ever told Ephraim about the hell she had gone through when with him so she just nodded. “then let’s finish this so mom will feed us dinner."
