What is your opinion?
Astounding
"This story is amazing, it feels like something out of a movie, i like how you brought the Japanese Mafia into this as well as street gangs, i hope you have more coming along because this has got me hooked!"
Fast-paced and enjoyable
"I just read what you have posted, and I did enjoy it. It worked out well for me stumbling across this, since i really like stories about gangs. This story reminds me a lot of a TV show I watched a while back (I think it was called Durarara). There was a gang in that called the Yellow Scarves too. I also really like the name 'Yakuza" for a gang. This story was very fast-paced, and things happened in rapid succession, making it seem very fit for something like a TV show. The plot was enjoyable. I'm not sure where this story is going yet, but I'm definitely interested. I'd like to know more about Lee and who he is. As of now, I don't really have much of a read on him. It was interesting that he was so casual about all that killing, and it makes me curious as to why he's that way. One thing i noticed was that he seems to talk to himself A LOT. A little of this is okay, but eventually it starts to get a little creepy. I would turn some of that into thoughts and inner dialogue so that he doesn't seem quite as weird. :-) The writing itself needed some more, but this definitely has potential. Great work! I hope you get lots of reads!"
Review
"The plot was great, and left me wondering what would happen next. It needs to be edited. The Japanese, though it made it a bit harder to read, added to the story. The dialogue helped craft an image of the scene and characters. Overall it was a great story!"
superb
"you should be a film writer ...You can write awesome film-scripts ....but your story is really good....keep it up ..Keep writing"
Good beginnings
"The story starts off straight in midst of the action. Gangland, Yakuza, Gunfire. It seems a story inspired more by cinema than literature, which is no bad thing at all. I found that the story fails to engage on one front, the (so far) lack of dramatic character motivation. The use of Japanese characters was fun, but sometimes a little confusing, and sometimes I felt that the dialogue could be a little sharper, but it did lead me to wonder what happens next."
