Chapter 1
My grandmother was a kind lady, so kind that one day when she was walking down the street and found a homeless boy she lovingly looked at the poor little creature then the first idea that came to her head was: I'm going to raise him up! He's my son from this day onwards!
Not only she opposed to her in-laws objections she even threatened to get a divorce and take away the real grandchild of the family namely my father, with her after the divorce if the little homeless boy was not accepted and treated as a family member as well.
At the time, She had no idea she made the biggest and most profitable investment in our country: that little boy who almost died in the streets, Belguassem Filladi, grew up and estabiished the largest Corporation in the whole country!
He became the richest man in Algeria.
Still, no matter how much money he offered to my grandmother as a reward of gratitude. she refused to take it, I thought she was being kind and selfless until one fateful day when she summoned us all in her chamber, and by all I mean me, 23 years old at the time, Belguassem Filladi, his prideful wife and daughter, and of course his almighty son, Eliyas Filladi.
She looked at us all with a pitiful way and she made a long reprimanding speech which made our hearts bleed of guilt, then she suddenly announced:
_“Eliyas shall marry Noursine!”
And yes. this Noursine who just landed her hands on a treasure is namely.. me.
I was dumbfounded, So was everyone in the room except for my grandmother, looked at Eliyas who was standing tall and indifferent behind his father and I thought to my self: what kind lady! my grandmother
is definitely a snake!
Belguassem who was overwhelmed with emotions and shed a bucket full of tears finally said with determination:
_"I'll definitely take my late brother's precious daughter as my own beloved daughter. Noursine is going to marry into our family!"
And that was how I ended up marrying Eliyas Filladi, the most wanted bachelor in the country.
I didn't love him, nor he did.
At the time, I was emotionally blackmailed by my sneaky grandmother in order to accept this marriage, she promised never to forgive me and die with heartbreak if I refused. Adding to this was the fact there wasn't anything bad about Eliyas to begin with, I was essily persuaded.
As for the materialist cold Eliyas, he of course was immune to emotional persuasion, only one thing made him sign his name beside mine with a frown on that marriage certificate: he was threatened to be disowned by his father, therefore marrying me meant keeping his fortune.
Having a forced marriage was the stupidest decision of my life.
Not only my existence was compared to the meaningless walls in their villa, my prideful mother in-law didn't miss a chance in which she forgot to remind me of my inferior origins, I was exempted of most of their social events. Eliyas on the other hand found my embarrassing poor class manners humiliating to his status, he often scolded me coldly.. never was affected by my sadness, and treated me so cold I hated him to the extremes.
Then one day, when I lost my baby because of him, I decided to no longer tolerate anything so after one year of marriage, I left him.
This was 3 years ago,
I thought when I will be away from the Filladis, I will manage to lead a life free of their memories and their influence, I was wrong though, because I'm always reminded of that stupid family!
Even at the doctor's clinic!
I was sitting in the waiting room of a dentist's clinic, browsing through a newspaper which was probaby left there by some patient. Although the newspaper dated 10 days earlier, still I kept reading it to push away my boredom and anxiety.
The room was full of women, the atmosphere was quite lively, I seldom enjoyed the random chats between strangers so that was too partly the reason why I chose to focus on the newspaper although the main articles displayed in the front pages annoyed me to the extremes, since they were all about the Filladi co and my "amazing" ex husband.
_"what a lovely young man!"
Commented the elderly lady siiting right beside while pointing her finger to the big image of the bright young businessman on the front page.
Soon, half the women in the waiting room stopped their unrelated chats and turned to Iook at the paper between my hands.
_"he is indeed! And so capable at a young age as well, what is it that he does exactly?" Another elderly lady added pensively.
_"he's the CEO of Filladi corporation, you know.. Almost every item in supermarkets is the production of that company" a young girl probably my age answered. She waited until all eyes were on her and then she excitedly added:
_"but the main point isn't how much money he has, but the fact that he is to die handsome! And single!! a real priceless walking candy! I would have dreamed and prayed for him to be my husband but I'm afraid that even the heavens will laugh at me for such impossible request."
The man on the front page was not single! that jerk Eliyas Filladi is still my husband according to the law and religion! This is a whole other big story in fact. to simply sum it up for now, I was allowed to leave Eliyas. But I wasn't allowed to get my divorce and be free from him.
Just like that, all the random chats suddenly focused on one topic, that is the man barely smiling in the front page of the newspaper to my torment. I never thought that i had to listen to people praising that scum Eliyas even in the dentist's waiting room, my emotions were so stirred that my already aching tooth was enraged as well and decided to hurt me tremendously more.
I couldn't tolerate the pain any further nor control my fright, So I went to the receptionist's desk and I pleaded with tearful eyes:
_"Can you please make me go next in queue. I really can't stand the pain any longer."
_"I apologize to you miss. But you had made no prior appointment so you have to wait until the doctor finishes with his appointed patients___"
I always had bad pain tolerating skills, To be precise, I was always frightened of pain. Even the idea of being hurt panickes me.
Once the pain in my tooth went even worse after l opened my mouth and spoke, I felt extremely cold and fell in darkness even before the receptionst finished her words.
I fainted.
When i woke up next, the first face that I saw belonged to a man probably in his mid thirties, he was not exquisitely handsome, but his soft eyes and high tipped slim nose were comfortable to look at:
_"are you ok miss?" He asked.
I noticed that he was wearing a white doctor's coat so assuming that he was a dentist at that clinic I said:
_"I'm ok.. But my tooth is kiling me, can you please do something about the pain?"
He chuckled once I finished speaking, He helped me steadily stand up from the floor, then in a commanding way he said:
_"Follow me to the examination room."
And so i did under the watchful eyes of the patients in the waiting room, They probably cursed me in their hearts for skipplng them in such disrespecttal way, but there was nothing that I could do to be more courteous, the pain was beyond my tolerance.
When we enterred the examination room another patient was already there: a lady sitting on the chair behind the doctor's desk waiting for his return.
_"what was the chaos about ?" she asked in a gossipy way.
The left side of her mouth was still under anesthesia so when she spoke her voice was a bit muffled and her lips moved weirdly, still no anesthesia can numb the curiosity of a chatty woman.
The doctor unhurriedly replied while joining his seat behind the desk:
_"it was nothing, This lady fainted"
She seized me up and dawn, then started talking nonstop:
_"how is that nothing! Young miss, Are you sick? pregnant? if you have diabetes you should eat something sweet, It's very risky to faint, you could hit your head! I heard our neighbor fainted because he was sleep deprived, the poor him hit his head when he fell and now he turned into a vegetable in a coma state."
The more that lady spoke, the more I felt terrified, her lips which were moving weirdly were giving me the scare af my life!
-"young people these days are so weak. Look at you turning sourer than a lemon! Are you going to faint again?"
Once she finished yelling these words, the dentist who was busy writing her prescription finally lifted his eyes to look at me again then he soon was alarmed.
Because there I went again .. Second round of fainting.
However this time, I didn't fully lose my consciousness.. I felt the dentist's strong arms catching me preventing me from falling on the hard ground, I heard his deep inhale the moment he grabbed my weight, and for an unknown renson, I was reminded of someone else's embrace.
He had similar strong arms.. Similar strong manly scent.
I was reminded of Eliyas.
I immediately jolted and rejected his help. Pushed him away and said a bit coldly:
_"I'm ok, no need to touch me."
I pushed the other chair in front of his desk then sat on it, as I was trying to calm my self and stop my shaky hands I finally said:
_"lady, I have Algophobia which means pain phobia. So l'd really appreciate it if you just stop mentioning such painful experiences of people. I am not weak nor diabetic, I'll be just fine if I stop thinking and feeling pain."
It was only then that the dentist finally decided to take action, he looked at me seriously and asked:
_"did you take any pain killers ?"
_"just minutes ago. It didn't start working yet."
He observed my trembling hands and perturbed breaths, then he quickly went back sitting on his chair, after he finished dealing with that lady and dismissed her, he spoke with me again, while noting my personal information he suggested:
_"can you walk to the examination chair or you need my help with that ?"
I shook my head, then I stood up calmly and tried to focus on walking. Since the idea of experiencing pain was tormenting me, By the time I reached the chair I was already hyperventilating and sweating:
_"Noursine. The pill will soon start having an effect. you will be alright." The dentist reminded me.
_"I know that.. But I, l cant control this fear, the pain must go" I hardly replied, I was already on the verge of panicking.
People usually fail to understand what it's like having such phobia, my husband was one of them as well.
I'm not mental! Nor sick! I just needed to be pain free! Being in physical pain always tormented me in a way I can't control. l only wished that someone would believe this, that I'm not exaggerating nor faking it.
_"you're in safe hands Noursine, I'm a doctor, I will not let anything happen to you" the dentist suddenly added in an attempt to calm my anxiety.
I looked at him again. At his soft eyes, then I tried to focus on them.
It was realy comfortable to look at him. He was covering half his face with a surgical mask, and the light was flashing from above his head putting contrast on his features.. He looked very sightly. Not that I particularly liked him, it was Just that I needed to find comfort to forget thinking about pain.
Few moments later, he chuckled again then said:
_"can you open your mouth for me to see."
Ater the examination, he prescribed some medication to take for few days first before he can fix my damaged tooth. by the time i sat on the chair behind his desk again the painkiller started to have an effect and my pain had reduced a lot, so I was back to being my usual calm and reasonable self.
_"I apologise for the chaos I caused earlier in the clinic" I said embarrassed.
He looked at me calmly for a long time, before he asked:
_"since when did you start having Algophobia"
_"since as long as I remember"
_"and you have no other anxiety disorders ?"
_"No."
_"it must have been very hard" he commented with a frown. He thought for a bit, then added:
_"it seems like you have a severe case of phobia, the pain you had in your tooth was probably very bearable for an average person"
_"I'm working on it" I lastly said. I received my prescriptinn, then left his office.
After paying the bill and leaving the clinic I was surprised to see 2 huge men in suits standing outside the clinic, they blocked my way when I tried to walk pass them. I frowned immediately realising that they were part of the Filladi's assigned bodyguards who lowkey surveyed me all the time.
One of them said:
_"master lady, the big master was informed about your visit to the clinic and the happenings here. he is concerned about your well being."
I felt bothered to the extremes, Their big master was of course my father-in-law. Belguassem Filladi.
I hated the fact I was still surveyed 100% of the time by his guards. I just wanted to be free of this family. Even if I end up thrown in the streets and dying from starvation I absolutely don't want them to bother with that. I want to be independent without them intervening in my life.
But no, Even after 3 years since I left their household, I was still under their watchful eyes.
"You tell the big master that I need no one to watch over me. that I appreciate his concern but he doesn't owe me anything nor have any relation with me, we're no longer family."
The two bodyguards nodded in unison, then dismissed them selves.
I shook my head while looking at their fleeting backs. I bet there was a dozen men already surveying me from every angle.
What a life.
I walked out to the street next, After going to the pharmacist and buying the medication in my prescription. I hired a taxi then went to the radio station where l work as a broadcaster.
Once I walked inside the station building my manager who happened to be walking down the stairs started scolding me the moment his eyes fell on me:
_"are you planning to come after we close the station? You know what time is it now? You'll be on air in half an hour time are you planning to get the station closed?"
_"I asked for a leave today.. I'm here to collect my materials for tomorrow's episode." I reminded him.
He looked like he was having a heart attack when he heard this. he shouted:
_"I refused your request! I had informed you! You'll be on air in half an hour. If you're unprepared you better improvise anything immediately! You're planning to kill me Noursine Saadat! You are planning to make all the station's staff go jobless as well! Etc"
Even by the time I reached the broadcasting theater he was still cursing me from behind, it wasn't until I closed the door and took my phone out of my bag that I noticed the message he sent earlier that morning.
That my demand of leave was refused and even if I had to die l had to wait until I finished my program and die after that.
He literally wrote this.
What a maniac manager!
Although he was the most dramatic and unreasonable person that I had ever encountered in my life, his ways of managing the station were still proven to be successful. Our channel had optimisticaly high ratings among D city's broadcasting channels. And I was responsible for the 12h to 13h segment which was very important since it coincidences with lunch time and usually has more listeners.
But it was very easy to replace me for my leave anyways. still the manager had to be so dramatic over it.
_"he's being unreasonable again?"
Faisel my coworker asked impatiently sitting inside the studio.
_"tell me about it, I asked for a leave.. His answer was I better die than skip"
Faisel, who was never such a chatty person, only nodded in understanding and then he said:
_"get your self ready. You will be on air in minutes."
I had no idea what to talk about in the show that day, I had an already prepared list of songs to play. But the main theme for the day was amiss.
The program I broadcasted usually consisted of asking the listeners a question then receiving their answers through calls and reacting to them. this sort of program was the trend then.
I had no idea what theme I should decide on that day though! I thought for a bit, the memory of the fear I had at the dentist was still vivid in my head.
After a bit of hesitation. I decided to ask the listeners their experiences with the dentists as well since that’s all I could think about.
I bet my manager will have a real heart attack once he hears the genius idea l came up with.
Sure enough.. After I went on air and I spoke my mind and said how I fainted from fright, even the usually unaffected Faisel Iaughed his heart out behind the glass.
Per the usual, the listeners started to call and share their stories. All was going smoothly until the third
call.
_ "allo" (hello) the caller said.
And for some reason, his voice sounded awfully familiar.
_"Ahla bik! ( welcome!) Can you introduce your self to the listeners."
_" my name is Yacine, and I'm a dentist, so I'm calling to share my story with one of my patients instead of speaking about an experience of my own."
_"sure, since you're in the profession you must have plenty of stories to tell, maybe you can encourage the easily scared people such us myself to have more courage to see a dentist before lt's late and the damage is big"
_"I'm not sure if my words will bring any encouraging. but today a woman visited my clinic and I felt us if I knew her from somewhere. after I heard her story at the dentist on the radio just now, she turned out to be the broadcaster I listen to almost everyday during my lunch time..."
I felt my heart skipping a beat right away, No wonder he sounded very familiar, He was the dentist I consulted that morning!
It was awfully obvious that this caller was talking about me even to Faisel behind the glass who sent me a signal asking me if he should cut the call.
I shook my head refusing to cut the call, And decided not to act rude with Dr Yacine in public, especially that he was nice to me earlier in the clinic, so I laughed and said:
_"I guess you have sharp ears then dr.Yacine, and now that you called what message would you like to deliver?"
_"I'd like to ask whether I could use the contact number she left to contact her.. And I mean contacting her not for professional reasons"
I choked on my saliva hearing his words.
I coughed for a long time while Yacine laughed on the other side of the phone. I vigorously made a signal for faisel to cut the call immediately but that shameless coworker of mine pointed his index to the upper floor indicating that he received orders from the manager to keep this call no matter what.
So they were sacrificing my face for the sake of listeners!
_" No" I bluntly replled " my answer is no, you can't contact me."
_"Well, since you rejected me in front of the whole city and my identity is already uncovered aren't you feeling guilty for my destroyed reputation? You should take responsibility for me Miss Noursine.”
What a shameless person!
But before I even said one word the call suddenly cut. I looked at Faisal surprised but the look on his face said it wasn't his doing.
I checked the calls Iine, there was another call already waiting.
_"Another listener is trying to contact us… Allo?"
I said once Faisel forwarded the call.
_" I haven't heard from you in a long time" the caller said immediately.
His voice sent shivers all over my body..
That deep hoarseness.. That coldness.
It all belonged to one certain person ..
He was Eliyas!
My ex husband!
