Chapter 1 - Safe
I stared into his eyes, the most beautiful blue shade I had ever seen. We were so close and intimate. I could feel their breath. I copied their breathing pattern to be closer to them. I had never been so intimate with someone. Spooning them was like being on every single drug. I was on cloud nine every time I was with them. They are my drug. We were watching the movie and it didn't matter as long as I could be this close to him. I want to kiss him so bad. Our faces were so close. If I kissed him, I might have overdosed on him. Maybe I should have kissed him. Even If I overdosed on him, it would never be enough. I needed all of him all of the time. I pulled him closer to me. He could never be close enough. My legs intertwined with his. This was love. This is what love is like. My heart burned with passion. I love him with all my heart. I felt his heartbeat. His life source so close to mine almost connected. He made a joke, we both smiled, he giggled, and I was even more in love. He was so cute when he was happy. I wish every night could be like this.
We went downstairs to grab a snack, joking and pushing each other down the stairs playfully. I grabbed the goldfish pouring myself a small portion as to not gain weight. He said that I needed to eat more and poured me more I love him so much. He grabbed my favorite drink, a diet coke. He grabbed us some Oreo's to make sure I ate enough. He always made sure that I was taken care of. He always made sure I got enough sleep and to eat. He was perfect in every way. His red fluffy hair, his face speckled with freckles. His eyes were so bright and perfect. He was perfect. He held my hand and pulled me back up to his room. We sat back on his bed this time not as close because we were eating snacks. I drank the soda while laying down. I spilled it all over me and snorted the rest up my nose. We sat there laughing as we were covered in diet coke. These are the moments that I live for.
He went to grab me a towel. I sat there happily. I sat there alone covered in diet coke, but I was happier than ever. My boyfriend came back with a towel, and I dried myself off and stole one of his hoodies to wear. I took another drink this time. Sitting up and didn't spill it onto myself this time. I wrapped my arms around him. My fingers traced his slowly gently. We un-paused the movie and clung to each other. We were like puzzle pieces, we fit into each other perfectly. I grasped his hand and held it to his heart. I felt his heart, it was so alive. I can't believe that love can be so gentle and sweet like this and not just screaming matches and abuse. Their touch is so gentle and soft. They turned their faces and smiled at me. I wanted to kiss them so badly. I wanted their lips on mine, their soft, beautiful lips. They're perfect in every single way.
I got a call from my mom. Yelling at me to come home, my blood stopped rushing, my heart slowed, and I frowned. "I have to go home" He sighed and said, "its ok". He was disappointed. He walked me down and said goodbye and I left. Y'know how people say it's a highway to Hell, for me it's a car ride to Hell.
