Chapter 1
He is the picture perfect boyfriend. I mean we aren't even dating yet.
Almost every day him and I make eye contact but one day I told my sister I thought he was cute. She told him and he gave me his number. When she told him he was generally shocked. I don't know why because he is so cute. Has no other girl told him that.
Friday we didn't talk much mainly because we go to different schools and we don't text much during school. Weekends we talked a lot more. We got to know each other and found out we have so much in common.
I'm not going to lie I thought he was faking me out. I thought I was just another toy to him. Maybe it was because that's what I'm use to. Or maybe it was because it was so perfect that I thought it was fake. Like what if he gave me someone else number.
We started talking about our futures and how if we stay in contact then we would travel together. The more we talked the more we found out that we had in common. I mean how is this even possible. He was definitely the highlight of my days.
He is about my hight. A little taller but that's totally fine with me. His hair stick out a little. It's a light brown or dirty blond. He has a great jaw line.
Monday I don't know what was going to happen in the morning when I see him. Like was he just not going to say hi to me or was I going to have to go hang out with his friends. I don't know.
Surprisingly he came and walked with me. I literally couldn't stop smiling and my heart dropped to my feet when he called me pretty. When you don't think you heart can drop more it does when he opens the door like a gentleman would. He was definitely raised right. I just want to go to his parents and say they did a great job on him.
I don't know why but I have the erge to grab his hand or arm and just walk with him. And when he left I just wanted to hug him but I thought that was way to soon.
Tuesday he broughte a crystal that I said I liked. Its purple like our favorite color that we share. And we both collect rocks. More that we have in common.
Now when I try to fall a sleep at night I think how much I am falling for a guy I met on Friday. Which is making me loose sleep thinking about him. I don't know how I fall for someone so easy. Most of the time I'm just straight up cold hearted. I feel like I have know this kid for a long time. I feel like I didn't have a life before him.
His voice is little deep and cute. It's like music to my ears. His hair looks so perfect and it fits him so well. His hands look like they can fit mine. If him and I where just walking together him and I don't even talking that's fine with me because his presence is all I need. I feel like if I was ever upset he would give me food and cuddle me.
If this guy and I never date I just want to be his friend at least because I mean why loose someone so great? He is so sweet and smart. It would be such a lose if him and I never date him.
Not all things can be true. He was gone like that. He said he gave his ex his everything and cant focus on what we had. He said we can still text but that didnt last long. I went from hours not texting, to days. I still think it was something i did even though he said its not you its me, but who says that and really mean it right? Its hard for me because i dropped everyone for him. So as soon as he left no one was there to pick me up. I wish I can just talk to someone and them not break up woth me even though we aren't dating. I wish that some decent looking gentleman comes knocking on my door but that will never happen.the past few days i don't care much to text him good morning or goodnight not that i have full forgotten about him its just indont have him on my mind like he use too. Only one of my friends still text me because he isnt to bisy like my other friends but even at that he doesn't text me much. This gave me some time to think about my self, to love my self. I realized that i dont need anyone (i still have separation anxiety). All I need is to love myself. I focus on that a lot more lately. Who ever is reading this just know it might suck. You might want to stay in bed for a long time. I get that but here is what you got to do. First take a day to recover, rather thats watch sad movies while snacking or going somewhere what ever you do do it for you dont let people tell you, you cant do it. After you "me day" work on things that better yourself. Always remember " Never regret the past just fix it for your future." (Brianna Messer).
