Chapter 1
God sees everything. God protects and punishes. God builds the tiny miserable path we are walking and destroys it. For what though? Nobody knows. I do not know either.
Nothing makes me wonder anymore. Looking at a sky so bright it forces tears out of my dry eyes, so bright they will never even comprehend its existence. I do not blame them for anything. It wouldn’t be fair to do so. It’s all the same, taking the shapes of different things and floating in the void. Humans think a lot, and only the realisation of an ability to think itself makes them already full, like a pig after swallowing left overs. It satisfies them. How accomplishing. It is a cycle I am forced to behold. It is a cycle I am forced to see. To see myself again and again falling from the skies that were mine. The skies that were once mine. I was their only saviour. Again.
Oh, it hurts my head how many feelings pass through the arteries like circulating fresh blood that could be bursting out of my brain at an any times. I am a mere creature of god. So self aware it is painful to look at it. I see all of the angles, all dimensions, all thoughts and feelings, every scent and taste is like a lingering buzz in my memory and in my black heart. Can't you see it? I am so hurt!
Am I? These are my duties. Which I will perform with not a single mistake. Can you believe, that I made you feel bad for me?
Like an endless path with the moon shining on it as if its inviting you to join the sinners on an ungodly parade of the light and the darkness, the death and the birth. Your only time to shine.
