Reina

We’ve never agreed upon the usuals, you know, tea or coffee , mountains or beaches, summer or winter and all those. And by we, I mean Reina and I.

She likes to argue at first, then will pick something grey. Water, countryside, autumn. She’s been really fond of rain, while for me, wasn’t allowed to go out in the rain.

Let me tell you more about Reina, she didn’t start speaking till she was seven.

“And she shows no signs of stopping” that’s what Mrs. Root say.

One thing that she excels at is finding herself amidst chaos, on her own or otherwise. Her prank during the 8th grade play or as she likes to call ” The Dwarven incantation” being the most notable one.

Our class was performing snow white and the 7 dwarves, Reina was asked to be one of the dwarfs. Because a) she’s a catastrophe. Which I feel is true to this day (sorry love ).

Ms. Amy wanted to keep her as far away from the stage as possible but she was smart enough to know that’ll give her more scope to scheme and plan something. So it was better to keep her in-sight. That didn’t go well either.

I had a decent seat to witness the pandemonium, right above the stage with the mic, narrating. The scene being, the dwarfs and Snow White dancing. And one of the dwarfs (precious Reina of course) separates itself from the circle takes out ‘a freaking wand!’ , “Avada Kedavra” so she screams, and her minions start the pyro. Ms. Amy reacted exactly how one would’ve expected her to.

“Hello Dear! How have you been?” Mrs. Root, as energetic as ever.

“Hello Mrs. Root”

“Here you go sweetie, your bosses don’t say anything? you come quite often, not that I mind.”

“As they say ‘Love makes the world go round’ Mrs. Root ” I said, taking the azaleas from her hands.

“Did you get rid of the mines yet ?”

“Like I could! You of all people should know how that’s going to turn out” Mrs. Root never liked them, but obviously who has the audacity to go against our Sheriff.

Gardening was the solution she came up with to channelize Reina’s chaos, and it actually worked, for the most part.

If I have to put it in her own words, “I like to add a bit of personal touch to everything in my life.” And so, her garden has never been restricted to pretty flowers, fruits and veggies.

Belladonna, Snakeroot, Hemlock to name a few of her landmines. Weed was on the cards, but I was able to talk her out of it. Not entirely though, she etched it on her bucket list.

Thanks to this newfound delight in gardening she calmed down a bit, just a teeny-tiny bit.

She’s never been the kind to stay still. Started doing new things for fun, though rather peaceful activities by her rowdy standards.

Trekking being one, to be precise, it was un-planned exploring. Our town is a rather small one, surrounded by a couple of mountains and bit of grasslands. Gives one enough scope to feel the beauty of nature, but if you were to live here long enough, obviously you’d be bored. But Reina has always liked it here, and I..?

“Archie! here for that ‘trinket’ ?”

“Yep! is it ready? I’m running a bit late Mr. O’Shea”

“Look at that, the city hubbub finally got you! Our poor boy, infected! By the urban steamroller!”

“Not really, but can’t keep her waiting for long, you know what she’s like right?”

“Yes, yes. Off you go”

Reina had developed this new habit of collecting grass, and would teach me their scientific names. I’ve never been any good at remembering them though. I think I can remember five at max.

Avena , Sorghum, Avena Sativa, Zizania and...“Nope can’t even recall 5 of ’em.”

She was always fascinated with learning a new language, but never consistent enough to learn one thoroughly. I like to talk too, but it fades in comparison to Reina. The listener in me rises from the grasps of Hades once she starts. We’ve known each other since the age of 5 and it’s fair to say I know...., or rather that I’ve been made aware about every little incident, more like recited to like a Royal Decree!

“I’m unfit for human relationships!” So she declared.

“Where did that come from?” I was much more bewildered than it may seem.

“I am not well; I could have built the Pyramids with the effort it takes me to cling on to life and reason.” she grins.

“Let me guess? Another Kafka piece, which one is it this time?”

“It certainly was not my intention to make you suffer, yet I have done so; obviously it never will be my intention to make you suffer, yet I shall always do so.” And... she quotes another.

“This is the one, my dear Felice” points to the book, ‘Letters to Felice’ by Franz Kafka.

I have always been against it. Her, reading these tragedies and these tales of unfulfilled desires, unrequited love.

She once asked me, “if I were a weather what would I be?”

“Pink skies in the evening with me, sitting amidst....” her curious expressions turned into glares of doom.

“Pink with a hint of dark clouds....?” her eyes lit up for a moment.

“A hint!?, seriously?”

A weird fascination she's had, with tragedy, calamity & chaos.

“Okay, you tell me, what weather are you?” I had given up.

“Ferocious winds like the sky is enraged, thick, dark clouds conveying its sorrow, then it rains, for days. As if, it weeps.”

The matters of heart have always raised a furor in her head. Always in disarray, too emotional at times and unsentimental at others. Would pick up instruments and scrawl while she weeps, if that makes any sense at all.

It’s not that she got her heartbroken a lot, but almost as if she manifested the chaos. It’s wry, for someone so good with expressions, she’s had a hard time enunciating her own self.

“Arch, what will you do now? where will you go?”

“I don’t know, might move in with my brother.”

“But you will come back!” She declared.

“Obviously, to see my parents and friends.” I wasn’t sure what she was getting at.

“No siree! you’ll come back for your beloved, ‘Reina’.” She grinned and leaned in.

There we had our first kiss.

And I, went on with my plans. Moved in with my brother. Far away from this city , far away from Reina.

If I could give her a middle name it’d be -‘irony’

For most of part of her life, she seemed ironical to me. Always out of sync with her own multitude of thoughts . She wanted to be loved so bad but would run away from it, maybe it was her people pleasing tendencies that made her like this.

That she’d be only satisfied if she were on the giver’s end of this cycle.

And then, would weep about how she’s never been loved.

Unfettered at times, a maverick to the crowd. And I was the crowd.

For all her innocence, she gave me the the greatest of days and the most sleepless of nights. Always on the run, on the edge and I had no choice but to cope up. Did I not resist or use my head enough...?

She was right about one thing though, I came back. For her? I wonder.

For a long time she felt intoxicated, misunderstood with her complex emotions. She was drowning in her own bedlam. And this would often lead to radical ways of self expression.

In order to feel what drowning felt like, and if it was similar to what she felt. She took a leap. The wailing sirens painted my horror. Yet, somehow I wasn’t surprised.

“Why do you loathe yourself so much?”

Reina had no answer, I went on for hours.

I still remember it all, but such a day, shouldn’t be spoiled with such memories.

She eventually recovered, in all senses of the word. Maybe it was my concern that was enough for her to understand that her life was not entirely her own. The idea of restraint, till then, had been alien, rather appalling to her. Yet she complied. I’d often ask why, or what it was.

But she, in her own alluring way would say, “Imagine, write about it well enough and maybe I’ll budge, just a little.” Typical Reina, always poetic, artistic never slowing down, unhinged.

“Archie! I was expecting you to come, how have you been?” I visit often and yet never been able to get used to the vigor of the people here.

“Pretty good Mr. Smith , you seem in good spirits too”

My mind was obviously somewhere else . Avena , Sorghum, Avena Sativa, Zizania...,

“And you, look well prepared my son” chuckles. He probably was referring to the azaleas and the jewellery.

Napier! obviously, the one that was missing had to be Napier, never been good at remembering it.

And... here we are!

مساء الخير حبي ( good evening my love)

“How was it ? Just something I learnt to impress you.”

“I have a lot to say, but bit short on time, so forgive....., ya right, you never liked that word. I’ll take my leave then.”

حبيبي ستبقى دائما في صلاتي

(my love you’ll always be in my prayers)