1. chapter only

"This sounds like a original story. I have not come across such a plot before, which was really intriguing but... please don't take out all the fun!!! [SPOILER] Platnost and her godess, on one day, felt connected and began to learn how to use their powers. This sounds so interesting yet you mentioned it in one paragraph. The whole chapter you mentioned many times that platnost and her godess went on a journey of self discovery, a journey to control their abilities, a journey to do whatever.... I do not want to read "they went on a journey" I want to go on a journey with them. Show me what they did on their journey, what kind of hardships they had to go through and what kind of fun they had. This would be enough to write many chapters. At one point you described the looming darkness over the realm, but i did not quite get what that is, the next thing I know is that they once again went on another journey of self discovery. If you want to introduce the adversary of the novel, make it more impactful Thats about the plot, now the writing: Grammar, punctuation is not something I have to mention👍 You tend to repeat yourself a lot, its enough if you once tell me that the other klot holder is in her fox form, dont say it another 4 times. Or that she has the ability to manipulate ice. And rather than telling me that she can manipulate ice, show it to the reader, let her build an ice chair for her to sit on for example. Showing is always much more powerful than telling. All in all, I can see a lot of potential in your story, do not cut out all the fun. Take this review with a grain of salt as it is only about the first chapter. If you think I misinterpreted something you are welcome to discuss it with me^^"