Love Next Door

I am Belle and this is the story of my life. My life has never been so easy. Every day I had to fight for opportunities but every time it felt like I got nothing. Story of a girl with a lot of demons and nightmares.

Since childhood, I always believed in fairytales and mystery creatures. I used to watch Disney movies to escape the reality. The reality, when always a princess gets saved by a prince charming and good overcomes all evil. My tiny little head used to fantasize about all the charm of fairytales. I was seven when I realized I was living in a prison. My life was good but not so good at the same time.

My father was a businessman and my mother was a house wife. He worked all day long while my mother used to look after the house chores. But always when they were together they used to fight a lot. I never really had a good time with them. I was very young to find myself trapped in a prison as they won’t let me go anywhere and make any friends. They only thing they wanted was me to stay at home and do my homework while when I looked at people of my age around me, they used to hang out with friends and have fun which I never had.

Whenever they fought I was always asked to stay in my room and to avoid the screams I used to watch cartoons and movies or tuck myself in the bed with a pillow covering my ears. It was always a torture. My father expected a lot out of me and always wanted me to score good grades in school to be something but little did he knew that I couldn’t focus on anything with all that was going on. Each day after 8 in the evening, I used to stay in my room and do my homework. My little head would always curl up in imaginations of making friends someday or having fun.

But years were passing by and my imaginations were getting all dark believing it might never happen. My childhood was passing by and I couldn’t be more in misery to stop what was going on. While everything going on with my life, my father’s business went into a downfall. The downfall made him lose his precious mansion and we had to shift somewhere else. It was a fine neighborhood and the environment was very cheery. Everybody was friendly and I liked the way our new home seemed.

It was a cozy house with many windows and a big balcony. A little garden area to grow greenery and driveway. The color of the house was very welcoming and the air had something very mystical in it. I loved this new move and expected may be things would change for once. Maybe I could make friends in the neighborhood and have some fun. Our house was in the middle of the street and only both sides we had people living. Even our balconies were so near that anybody could hop into anyone’s. I liked it.

My teenage years were starting and I was very excited to make little decisions about my life. I didn’t want anything of my old room to be a part when I was decorating my new room. My room was a medium sized room with a huge window and a balcony that opened to the balcony of the room next door. Whosoever lived in that room had a great taste in plants or flowers as the balcony had cute little white flowers giving my room a beautiful aroma as the wind blew. I wanted to give my room a classy look with no more child hood toys or stationary. Everything classy and of my age.

In a week or so I decorated my room with white curtains and wooden furniture. The paint of walls was black on a single wall and beige on the rest three and I hanged all my certificates and pictures on the black wall. I used to paint and make portraits and the one single painting I made was hanged on it in the middle that reminded me of my childhood. It seemed very colorful but was very dark if anybody could read it. My childhood toys were replaced with a MacBook as my homework was increasing electronically day by day and I still wasn’t allowed a phone to use.

In the beginning, my life was plain and simple but each night my stupid neighbor used to blast his speakers with loud music and I couldn’t study at all. My parents were very much strict with me whenever I used to talk to any stranger or make new friends. But this was that one night when his music blew loud for about two hours straight and I was highly irritated to even ignore it. And in that moment of irrational anger and I went to my balcony and screamed at the top of my lungs so that I could match that speaker’s sound. It was that moment, when I first saw him and felt like we zinged…

He came out wearing an oversized, black tank top with sport shorts, along with a golden chain on his neck and those brown messy hairs all over his eyes. The way he brushed his hand through his hair and swapped them back, made me froze and all my screams turned into a moment of awe. He came out staring at me with his deep, brown eyes and we both stood in silence. But then I couldn’t let my emotions flow just like that and gathered my strength to ask him why would he blast his speakers in the middle of the night. At first he just stared at me but later he apologized for his unethical behavior of disturbing people at night. It was a good small talk and I came back in leaving him stand there watching me leave. What else could I have said?

With the passing days, I saw him more often, while going to school, in the playground, smoking at the end of the street and more often in his balcony, smoking after everyone went to sleep. He would sit on the floor of his balcony for hours and smoke weed or I don’t know what crap. It was the mid of June when our school vacations started and I had nothing to do at night, somedays I sat in my balcony for hours watching the stars above my head and reading my favorite novels. I could do nothing else but read because I knew even if I tried to watch a movie, the noise would bring attention towards my parents to scold me for that too.

Reading was one of my favorite hobbies and the only, productive one too as my parents considered painting as a waste of time. Some days, I painted too, on a canvas in my balcony, under the stars and beside a charming neighbor smoking and watching me at the same time. For days we didn’t talked but then one day when I was doing my usual thing he asked me why don’t I sleep and paint all night? I didn’t have an answer to that and all I could say was I had insomnia. What else could I have said? This? That my parents fight and their screams haunt me or this, that I was a prisoner in my own house and prisoners lose their sleep after having to repeat each and everything on a daily basis for the past 14 years. I went speechless.

We started off with small talks after a day or two but, with time it grew into us talking daily and spending all night together chatting about the most random stuff. Some days he would hop into my balcony and we would pain some random stuff together, even watch a movie wearing headphones. But, it was all a huge secret of my life because anybody could know but my parents couldn’t. I finally had a friend, whom I began to trust, put my faith into, talk my heart out and tell my nightmares. I actually began to have fun for once in my life which I always craved and which I wouldn’t let go no matter what. His name was Daniel, a guy with a simple but scary personality for people who would look at him for the first time. Yet, an honest and loyal person who was very much caring and down to earth for people who knew him. Our friendship grew stronger and time was passing by so quick that it was like a blink of an eye and the year passed. We were so close to each other that my heart would fade away whenever he wasn’t there to talk or spend time with me. Maybe with the growing age, my not so tiny heart anymore, was developing feelings for him.

It was that one time when he went for a vacation with his family making me look at the sight of his house with lights switched off all the time and the empty balcony with no presence of Daniel started to haunt me. My nightmares were growing and due to the remote area of Northern side, there were no connections too, to contact each other. All of it felt like a hollow in my chest and each day I counted to the day when they’d come back. His absence made me realize how special he was to me. His absence made me thinking that, am I catching feelings for him? Each night I would sit in my balcony and wait as if he was going to return in the middle of the night. How foolish of me!

After this week of nightmare and torture, they were back. I saw their car when I was returning from school and my eyes shone like anything. My heart started beating as fast as it could and I couldn’t wait to meet him. It was a thing in my house that whenever somebody enters the house they have to take off their shoes, clean them, put them in place, although maids were available but no! My parents loved to make rules. I was rushing through things but I couldn’t show it as well. It would have taken no less than a minute for them to figure out the rush through my veins and smell the fish. I could do nothing but stand with my calm and composed face to get through it and rush into my room and finally when I was done, I went for my room. And what I saw, was a surprise to my eyes.

He was there! He was there, in my room! Daniel was in my room! I was happy and scared at the same time. I didn’t know what to do first. Run towards him and hug him or lock my room first. It was a fairytale moment, as after all those dark nights, light stood in front of me. But precautions first! I locked my room, making no sound at all and ran towards him to hug him. It was the most awaited hug of all time and my soul never felt that better. He held me so tight that for a second I couldn’t breathe, and whispered in my ear that, “I miss you!” He missed me. Just like I did. And I whispered back, hugging him tighter, “I missed you too!” “A lot!” After that long and tight hug he looked into my eyes and said, “I brought something for you.” And I couldn’t wait to see it. He gave me a locket. A locket with an infinity sign carved with our names, Daniel and Belle. Actually our initials, D and B. He said, “It’s the sign of infinity, and nothing can break us apart.” It was that moment when we looked into each other’s eyes and felt that love. The love I craved for. It was beautiful. His hand went from my waist to my face and he leaned closer to me, as if he wanted to feel me. I could actually feel the butterflies in my stomach. The touch of his hands made me lower my eyes and feel the warmth of his hand on my face. I couldn’t feel happier having someone for whom I was that much special.

But then, something interrupted that beautiful moment of ours and it was nothing else but a loud knock. Knock! Knockk! Knockkk! And there stood my mom. Outside. Waiting for me to open the door and it felt like shivers ran through my backbone. Daniel hopped in his balcony so that Mummy dearest, doesn’t see him but I was there standing in my school uniform. I didn’t even change my clothes. My fear grew and I couldn’t understand anything and I shouted that I was taking a shower. I drew curtains on the window of the balcony, took my clothes off and rushed into shower. But it was as if my lucky day that my Mum said that I should get done with shower quickly because Dad was waiting for lunch downstairs. I had my shower as fast as I could and dressed up myself so that I could be on time.

I went down and saw the wait in my father’s eyes. I could see anger which made me freak out. But I sat on the dining table quietly and waited for Mum to serve lunch. I felt like Dad was about to scold me but stopped after looking at my wet hair. We all had a quiet lunch and then I was told to go in my room and finish my homework. I was relieved to hear that because I never liked that quietness with two people around but still nobody talks. I went to my room and started my homework because I knew, my parents wouldn’t tolerate the missed school work if any complaints came through their front door. My Mum too, came in my room to check on me and I was clever enough to lock my window because the sight of Daniel standing in my room scared me, if any day Mum sees him. They didn’t even know that I had boy just next door. And I never wanted them to know this as well.

I completed all of my daily chores and after dinner there’s a rule in my house about family sitting together to talk about random stuff, but that random stuff was always about my dad talking about business and mum telling about all of her kitty parties in the club. I used to sit quietly and answer to questions they asked. But today, the restlessness in me wanted to leave the hall and rush towards my bedroom but again the act I have to put up with was necessary too. So we sat for an hour and later everybody went to sleep. I entered my room, locked it and unlocked the window when suddenly my mum knocked the door again. That shiver was there again and I hurriedly locked the window and opened the door to mum. There she was wanting to tell me that the driver would drop me to school and pick me up later as they would be leaving for an important business meeting early in the morning and that would take a day.

My reaction to that was a basic, “Alright!” but inside that thick skin my soul was jumping in delight as nobody would be home and I could do whatever I want. She went saying goodnight and again I locked the room and finally, opened my balcony. There he was, sitting in his balcony waiting for me. We smiled at each other and he hopped in my balcony, entering my room. It was like from the moment he came back; he was behaving a bit weird or I would say he was much closer to me than ever. I told him about my parents that they wouldn’t be home in the morning and I’d be home alone all day and night till the next morning. He was joyed to hear that and told me we’d watch movies and have fun all day. We chatted all night and sat next to each other holding hands, looking at each other and smiling. He was so close that I could feel his breathe and he won’t leave my hand. It was a moment when we were talking about our lives and me talking about my parents and my life brought tears in my eyes. He wiped them off and we looked at each other with something in our eyes that I didn’t knew what. His fingers wiped my tears falling from eyes and the way he moved them down to my lips wiping them, made me feel something. A jitter! Something that wanted him more close to me. We were looking at each other and something happened. Daniel leaned closer and his lips touched mine and this was the first time and how my eyes got closed I have no idea. We kissed! He leaned back, to look at me and I was staring at him with shock in my eyes. He smiled and kissed me on my cheeks too and told me, “You are the most beautiful soul I have ever met and nothing can keep us apart.”

It felt like love all in the air and our souls tied through the red thread just like the one mentioned in the Chinese myth. We were flying in the air and looking at each other with eyes full of light. We later, sat for hours beside each other and there was this shyness and happiness, together at the same time. Holding hands, looking into each other’s eyes and even the warmth of sitting beside each other was giving us butterflies. .He felt like destiny to me and I felt like the luckiest girl ever. I didn’t want him to leave but obviously he had to go. It was sunrise by then and he had to leave, because I had to go to school as well. While saying goodbye too, he hugged me and kissed me on my cheeks and told me that when you’ll be back, I’ll be here to kiss you and hold you again. His words felt like a giant wave of cold air hitting me.

All day long in the school, I was thinking about him and our moment. I started to feel even more than ever before and I just wanted to go back home and kiss him again. I wasn’t focusing on whatever the teacher was saying. It was like nothing could hit my ear drums except for his words and nothing could touch my skin, other than his hands. My soul was all in the air and all I could do was wait for this long day to end. My driver picked me up after school and took me home and I rushed towards my room to hug him tight, but. Daniel wasn’t there. I checked my window if I left it locked but instead it was unlocked. I stood there in my balcony but he wasn’t there in his room as well. It felt like a sad wave and I came back in. Went to take shower as it was very hot today. The water on my body felt like he was touching me with his hands, and the smile on my face was from the memory of our kiss. My body was behaving in an irrational manner about which I knew nothing. It felt like a warm thing tingling me from my head to toe and giving me the good shivers.

I was all alone and I almost thought that Daniel wouldn’t come as he might be busy in work of some sort otherwise he had shown up. I wore a white short oversized tank top which was transparent enough to show my pink bra with my blue comfy shorts as I knew that I would take this day to sleep and give rest to my body. As my hair drenched into water, I came out to take my hair towel and in front of my eyes I saw him. Daniel was sitting on my bed waiting for me. The moment I saw him, I felt those good shivers again going through my body. The way he looked at me with a smirk on his face, brushing hands into his hair and checking me out from top to bottom, it was making me feel shy because I wasn’t someone who would show so much skin after just one kiss, not even a steamy one. But there he was, making me nervous and smile at the same time. The way he stood and walked towards me, pushed my soul to take my steps back till I was there, stopped by my bedroom wall and him so close to me. I couldn’t utter a single word, just that my hands were on his chest stopping him to come any closer or kiss me again.

But something strange happened, he came closer with one hand on the wall and other on my face but didn’t kiss, instead asked me to look into his eyes. I wasn’t able to. “I can’t!” I said. And the way he lifted my chin up so that I would look. That feeling was mesmerizing and there was this feeling I never got before. The way we looked into each other’s eyes and the depth of love I could see there, was unimaginable. We were lost into each other. The warmth of our souls were enough for both of us. We needed nothing more. We stood there for I don’t know how long and looked how much we love each other. He whispered, “I am not going to kiss you, love!” “You can stop pushing me back.” All this time I didn’t realize that I was trying to push him back with my hands on his chest. I took my hands off him and said, “Sorry! I didn’t realize.” And he smiled which led me asking, “Why are you smiling like that?” and he said that, “We don’t need to kiss to feel the love between us.” “Our eyes speak the perfect language of love and that is enough.” It made me realize that he wasn’t there to kiss me or make out with me. He was there to make me feel his presence, make me feel that somebody in this world would always be there for me no matter what and to make me realize how love sounds, speaks, feels, and smells.

He was a beautiful chaos of my life and I couldn’t feel more alive. All day long he laid beside me talking about the most random stuff of his life and there I laid looking at him in silence. All I could think was, what made him fall for me. I was a basic person with a fucked up life. How can I get something so beautiful just like that? I didn’t even listen to what he was telling. I was just lost in the beauty of his soul and interrupted him asking, “Why do you love me?” He stopped in that moment and stared at me. He was quiet. He didn’t answer. I was waiting and my restlessness made him ask again, “Tell me, what made you fall for me?” In that moment, he turned himself to be on top of me and I felt as if I was out of breath for a second or two. He looked into my eyes and said, “I will tell you when the time is right.” I laid still and said nothing as I knew he meant something and I don’t know about it. Maybe this was too early to ask. So we continued with talking for hours and watched a romantic movie, After.