Cursed Suicide

*Dazai*

Dazai died. Or at least he tried to. Seriously jumping from the Port Mafia’s building wasn’t one of his best decisions but oh well. He wished for a painless goodbye and yet as he thought about it smashing on the cold pavement didn’t sound that welcoming.

As he was falling to his death, he took a quick look towards the city beneath him. It was beautiful, it has always been but something from this view made his heart sting. It was really going to end here. He didn’t know why he waited that long. After Oda’s death nothing was the same. Even four years later he could still feel that empty hole growing in the pits of his stomach. Life really didn’t have a meaning.

He felt sorry for one thing though – leaving Chuuya behind. Arahabaki wasn’t one of the friendliest companions and since Dazai wasn’t going to be there to stop him, the ginger would have to learn to suppress the god on his own. Ah. He didn’t get the chance to mess with his partner’s wine collection for the last time. Oh well.

Dazai closed his eyes, letting the wind ruffle his hair as he readied himself for the impact. That was going to hurt. He hoped he could break his neck first.

The brunet sensed the ground coming closer, he inhaled for the last time and held his breath. But the impact never came. Dazai shot open his eyes, something in him twisting with irritation. Who dared to save him again? Was it that angry short bastard again? Or was it Mori and his obsession over the him? He was going to make sure that human never walked on earth again. The audacity of some people amazed him and annoyed him to no ends.

The brunet sat up, feeling the ground around himself. He squinted his eyes. This wasn’t the old grey cement in front of the Port Mafia’s building. What the fuck. Did someone teleport him with an ability or something?

Dazai got up, brushing his dark coat and coughing awkwardly. He scanned the environment around him. Where the fuck-?

He was in a forest. A fucking forest in Gods know where. He stopped breathing for a moment, staying completely still so he could listen at his surroundings. There were no animals nearby and a whole lot of energy radiating in the air. The unknown energy was bending and flowing like water, he could feel it and yet it wasn’t like an ability and he couldn’t see it. Shit. Dazai frowned, releasing his ability so he could coat himself with it, leaving the new energy out.

Dazai clicked his tongue, feeling his guns under his coat. His weapons were still there and that somewhat reassured him. This surely wasn’t what he had in mind when he thought of dying. When he was about to take a few steps forward he felt a presence behind him. The brunet stopped in his tracks and put both his hands in the air, slowly turning around.

In front of him now stood a buff man with shades and a beard. He looked intimidating and Dazai decided not to attack yet. The man wore a black uniform, which was covering his whole body. In that hot weather? The brunet quickly looked him all over, taking in every detail, relaxing his face in a small smile.

“And who might you be?” The man took his hands out of his pockets and let them hang next to his body. He had huge hands but a gentle touch from what Dazai could see. This man didn’t fight that much.

Dazai pondered on the question for a few seconds, letting his mind slowly scan over pros and cons about telling the truth. Then he decided – half lies, half-truths.

“Osamu Dazai.” He introduced himself, taking a few steps forward and dropping his hands down.

The man frowned, before introducing himself as Masamichi Yaga. Dazai was sure to remember the name.

“Ah then, Masamichi – san, would you tell me where I am?”

Yaga frowned even more, pushing his shades higher on his nose. He looked like he didn’t want to tell him so Dazai smiled innocently. The brunet slid his hands in the pockets of his pants, accepting a more relaxed stance. Challenging the stranger wasn’t going to do him any good.

“You’re on Jujutsu High school’s grounds.”

A school. Dazai went over the new information again and again, trying to remember if he ever heard of this place. Oh how he was going to torture the one who sent him here. Dazai was going to make sure the man was going to die slowly and painfully. Then after he was done taking his sweet revenge, he would throw the body in the river, while drinking from Chuuya’s favorite wine bottle.

Yaga soon interrupted his train of thoughts.

“I’ll ask you to come with me and tell me more about how you got here.”

Dazai embraced his nature as an actor and pulled out the most scared face he could muster. That visibly made Yaga uncomfortable. Then the brunet clasped his hands in front of his chest and made sure to embrace a pleading look.

“I-I’m sorry. The thing is... I was abducted and I somehow woke up here. I seriously don’t know where I am.” Osamu forced his hands to tremble slightly, adding even more validation to his acting. He even faked a stutter.

“I see.” Yaga almost looked sympathetic if it wasn’t for his frown and shades. But even with this Dazai didn’t drop the act, diving head first in his lying skills.

After a while of talking in the forest, Yaga took him to the so- called school for what Dazai found out to be jujutsu sorcerers. What a truly amusing situations. From what he could gather until now, the brunet figured that he was in a different dimension. He somehow transported or someone else helped him. He didn’t know but one thing was for sure... he had to keep quiet about it. And it seems his sweet suicide would have to wait.

In Yaga’s office they talked more, Dazai skillfully knitting lie after lie, making up a whole traumatic story about how he was kidnapped and how he had a sad past. He could see the director believing him and that made him satisfied with himself. What he didn’t lie about was his name and age – the beautiful 22 years he proudly owned. Staying alive for that long sure was an achievement in itself.

“Dazai-san, I suppose you don’t a have a place to stay, don’t you?”

“I, in fact, do not.” Osamu smiled shyly, putting his everything to the look he casted towards the floor in ‘embarrassment’. “I used to live far from here.”

“I can sense the curse energy in you... it’s surprisingly a lot. Why don’t you stay for a few days here in Jujutsu High? I would wish to monitor you for a while until I’m sure your energy is under control.”

Now that was a load of bullshit. Dazai almost snickered, almost, as he looked back at Yaga and nodded slightly. The director was either really gullible or just straight up stupid. What cursed energy? He guessed that was his ability... seems like this world’s “energy” wasn’t that different from his after all. He could pull that off and hopefully continue the path towards his death.

“Then... let Gojo look after you. He’s a skilled sorcerer and will help you with the control.”

Ah... a new name. Dazai racked his brain, desperately trying to connect the name with a face and just like he thought- he didn’t know who that was. Anyways he kept quiet. Masamichi pulled out his phone, dialing a number and putting the device next to his ear. The one on the other end of the line eventually picked up. His voice echoed through the room as he shouted in the phone.

“Hiiiiii~ Yaga – sensei!”

Yaga sighed in exasperation and pinched the bridge of his nose just under his shades. Dazai used the time to scan over the room they were in. It was made in an old Japanese style and smelled like lavender. The brunet followed the scent with his nose, turning his head towards the two aroma candles, burning near the window. Yaga-san sure had a unique taste.

“Gojo, I need you here. We have a new recruit and you must take care of him for the time being.”

The man – Gojo went quiet for a few moments before answering with a much lower voice ‘yes’ and hanging up. Dazai blinked curiously at Yaga who only coughed, trying to brush the awkwardness away. Then the director gave it his all to fill the space with a shallow conversation.

After a few minutes in the room teleported a man. He was tall as fuck, white hair flying everywhere and defying gravity, clothes dark and expensive. Everything about this man screamed rich and classy. He was holding a plastic bag with what Dazai deducted was a strawberry cake. The man wore a blindfold over his eyes and a little smile. He leaned slightly back, hands in pockets and a smug smile on his face.

He looked around the room, his head slowly turning towards Dazai. The brunet didn’t even flinch as Gojo stared at him through his blindfold. Dazai coated himself in shyness and innocence as the white-haired sorcerer went towards him. The man’s height was slightly intimidating even thought his lips were pulled in a smile.

Yaga hurriedly explained the whole situation to him as Gojo only nodded along. He scanned Dazai all over, spinning around him. Then he stopped right in front of his face, bending forward so their noses almost touched. The brunet faked a slight flinch and waited until the man backed away. That Gojo guy had absolutely no respect for personal space. Something that Dazai immediately found interesting and amusing. They were the same in that sense.

“Gojo Satoru.” The man introduced himself properly, stretching his hand forward so Dazai could shake it. And that was where the brunet let a smile craw on his face. He wanted to test this new energy so much that he almost trembled from the chill that ran down his spine.

Dazai turned his smile into a timid one – an act, blinked rapidly towards the hand – an act, stretched his hand slowly and uncertainly – an act... and grabbed Gojo’s hand, shaking it slightly while releasing his ability. Satoru looked taken aback at first but he quickly recovered and even smirked, squeezing Dazai’s hand. The sorcerer bent forward so he could whisper in the brunet’s ear.

“You’re not from here, are you?” Dazai didn’t flinch, he licked his lips slowly, his eyes darkened and he stared intimidatingly towards the blindfold. Gojo didn’t let his hand go, a mistake, really.

“How did you know?” Osamu pulled his gun, pressing it into Gojo’s abdomen just where Yaga couldn’t see. The director just sat there, looking at them both. Thanks to Gojo’s wide figure, he sheltered Dazai from the director’s eyesight. Just perfect.

Satoru and Dazai stayed like that without moving for a few moments. Both of them going over and over what could happen from this point on, their minds running a few miles at mere seconds. Gojo eventually smiled, putting his hand on the gun and slowly lowering it. Dazai let him do it, until the weapon was facing the ground. They both were trying to read each other, to find out what the other would want, would do.

“I’m going to keep quiet about everything that just happened. But you’re coming with me.” Gojo whispered so only Dazai could here. Brown eyes stared back at Gojo’s covered ones while Dazai gave a slight nod. He then hid the gun under his coat like it was never out in the first place and embraced the shy and timid act again. The white-haired smiled wider and stood up, towering with a few centimeters over the brunet.

“Satoru, what are you doing to the newcomer?” Yaga eventually got bored of waiting and decided to break the deafening silence.

“Nothing, nothing. Just checking for rabies.”

Dazai scoffed, putting his hands in his pockets. Gojo was surely to annoy him later. Well... that meant that he was going to annoy him back just as much.