Welcome To Internet (Part 1)
There are events, places, and people forgotten by time. That’s what we want. In a field of grass nestled between farmland sits a square white building with windows. It lives on the outskirts of Classified, and trust me when I say it is entirely average. Its name, INTERNET.
This corporation has two purposes. The first is to provide high-speed internet to the farmers who live off the radar of traditional cable companies. The second is that... you should hear it from the horse’s mouth. Where is this horse? It’s on basement floor 15 of the building, in room 1524.
The room is small and square, with two desks hugging the wall and one facing the door’s glass opaque window. A thin layer of dust coats the roam except for the computer monitor and microphone on the head desk. In the room, a 3rd generation roach walks on the walls his grandfather journeyed on, then it hears something. A sound lost to this room since the fall of the previous giant. It hears two mean bickering on the other side of the door.
RICO
But why way down here?
EDWARD
You did this to yourself. You’re the one who
didn’t want to be a field agent anymore.
The roach scurries as the door handle twists. The door opens, and a disgruntled Edward opens the door.
Standing next to him in a short-sleeved grey button-down with small red dots and the same black slacks and sneakers is Rico. He is a 27-year-old Hispanic male with his hair tied up in a bun but with the sides shaven. He has large thin silver-rimmed glasses.
They step into the office, Edward rolling his eyes with every word Rico complains.
RICO
It was crazy out there, Edward. I saw a shark
jump out of a dude’s stomach and flop its way into
a tv and not break the tv, like it went inside the tv show.
Rico stops and stares into the distance. The horrors and carnage of what he saw replayed in his mind.
RICO
Dipper didn’t see it coming.
EDWARD
That’s what you signed up for.
RICO
That’s not true. There’s no way to sign up for that.
We don’t go in during those “events.”
EDWARD
Well, you sighed up for this when you tried to quit.
Edward flicks the light as the bulbs struggle to turn on, but they do. Rico basks in the forgotten room glory as the light bounces off the floating dust particles.
RICO
Where am I?
Edward walks to the table and pulls out the chair. He holds a smile and shakes the chair a bit, tempting Rico to sit. Rico, on the other hand, finds this incredibly insulting, but Edward is the one who signs his checks, so he goes along.
EDWARD
Here’s your seat.
RICO
Am I cleaning this room?
In the shadows, tiny feet scurry away.
RICO
Oh, hell no. Was that?
Edward smiles, ignoring the question.
EDWARD
Your new duties include-
RICO
Was it a rat?
EDWARD
Relax.
RICO
No, no, NO. I can’t be in a rat-infested room.
EDWARD
At least it doesn’t have roaches.
The roach in the wall releases a sigh of relief, knowing its family secret is safe and I will continue the pilgrimage its grandfather started.
EDWARD
You work for INTERNET and will
work in whatever room they want.
Rat-infested, roach-infested, even if it’s
filled with the bubonic plague.
RICO
Our company has a weird name; it doesn’t make sense.
EDWARD
That’s the point. It’s a name no one would expect.
Our job is to record everything that happens
in the world. From the ordinary to the impossible.
If Tim forgets a cup of coffee, we better know
how much sugar it had. If an ancient
civilization of Gator people rises from the
swamps of Florida, we better know
the leader’s favorite color. We make sense of it all.
RICO
We can do better. Like “Vigilance”
EDWARD
Forget the name. You made a commitment
when you sighed the dotted line
when you were hired. To investigate, research,
and make sense of it all. What was
your job before here, Rico?
RICO
Anomaly Investigator.
EDWARD
Pre or Post?
RICO
Mostly either Post or during.
EDWARD
That’s not right, we don’t do “during.”
That’s for the other guys you know, those agents,
vigilantes, not us. We never interfere with events
we only record them. So, you could not have been during.
Rico jumps up from his chair. He stares Edward face to face, the veins on his neck pop with every syllable.
RICO
Well, someone messed up because
I was in it a lot! I couldn’t stand it.
It twisted my head. I just... needed to get out.
There is a moment of silence. Edward stares down at Rico. He notices how Rico’s hands are clenched but tremble. He catches the stern expression but the terrified eyes. It’s a look Edward has seen on Agents, heroes, or even regular civilians he talks to in his investigations. He has seen it.
Someone must have messed up as Rico should have never been there for any of his investigations, but he has. The horrors he must have seen. Edward takes a breath and softens his tone. He needs to reassure Rico, but he still needs to do what his job.
EDWARD
Okay, my bad I believe you.
That’s why you’re here, and if you
want to keep your job you’ll stay in this room.
RICO
I can’t lose this job it has health and dental.
Edward goes to the door. On the side facing the room is a thick slot on the door where people shoved case files tapped close. They land in a basket on the door. Edward picks them up and slams them on the desk.
EDWARD
Then get to recording.
Rico looks through the files and notices the red tape keeping them close.
RICO
These are reports agents have already
finished righting up and have approved.
Lookthey have red tape and all.
EDWARD
Yes, red tape. These are agent accounts,
records whatever you want to call it.
They are the accounts the field agents recorded.
The red tape as you know means the case file
as been reviewed by the agent and their supervisor.
These are built off interviews with civilian, anyone who was involved, or brain strips of the people who saw or interacted with the anomaly.
RICO
Brain strips... isn’t that where
an agent gets the memories of the deceased?
EDWARD
Yea, if we didn’t make it in time,
they shove a needled right into the brain
and try to get whatever memories
they can. Then the agent tries
to make sense of it all.
RICO
Why am I here?
