The Past Will Find You

Tomorrow marks my 18th birthday. A normal werewolf would have a celebration with all of their pack. 18 years is when a person is gifted their wolf from the moon goddess. This celebration would include a feast, gifts, a shifting ceremony, and a pack run officially welcoming the new wolf. I remember attending a single shifting ceremony as a child, it was magical. My father's Beta and his mate held the ceremony at the pack house for their eldest child, Lotus. She often looked after me, since my father was the busy, ever-working Alpha and my mother had her Luna duties.

Lotus told me all about her wolf when I caught them mind-linking. I was confused because she was not speaking out loud, but she explained when I get my wolf one day that I will be able to communicate with her and that she will be my best friend, a part of me. Lotus was so excited to see her wolf for the first time, and she got to wear the most beautiful gown for the ceremony. I remember fondly thinking that she looked like a princess. I can also remember her screaming in pain from her first shift, which scared me, but soon she transformed before my eyes into a beautiful charcoal wolf with white paws. Her eyes shone an icy blue, she looked so proud, and then she sprinted away into the woods. All of the other wolves, including my parents, followed her, howling with glee. When I saw Lotus the next day, she was glowing. She assured me the pain wasn't so bad, it was more freeing. She told me about how she found her mate on the run, who happened to be my father's Gamma, Lennox, and from that moment forward I could not wait for my 18th birthday. I could not wait to meet my wolf. I could not wait to find my mate. I quickly forgot the dream of a party though, in fact, I honestly cannot believe I've survived this long.

It's been 13 years. 13 years running, 13 years hiding, 13 years with only Lennox and his wolf, Hurst. Don't get me wrong, I'm grateful to have them, Lennox raised me and Hurst, I've only met a few times, but he's protective mostly. Sure Lennox is a little rough around the edges...and definitely hardened on the inside, but I don’t blame him after all that he’s endured. I wouldn't be here today if not for them.

13 years ago...

My 5th birthday! I had a party with the other pups around my age. We played games, there was an obstacle course Gamma Lennox built just for me, there were balloons and candles and streamers. EVERYTHING was PERFECT. Mom and Dad were both present with me all day, rooting me on to beat all the pups on the obstacle course. I did of course...the Alpha blood maybe helped. My mom and Lotus said they wished I had gotten something a little calmer, but Dad and Lennox said it's never too early to start training. I took a deep breathe and was about to blow out my candles, when the alarms sounded, and then the power cut out.

I vividly remember panicked screams through the darkness. I was knocked off of my chair and I scrambled backwards until my back hit the wall behind me. I didn't make a sound. I covered my ears, but not my eyes. I stared at the glow of the 5 small flames of my candles, desperately wishing for everyone's safety. Many shadows crossed in front of them, frantically. I noticed that 2 more golden glowing orbs formed above them, they were eyes, and they were staring right at me. Somehow, through the darkness, they pierced right into my soul. They were suddenly blocked from my view, and I recognized my mother's scent immediately. I uncovered my ears and called out to her. She shifted into her magnificent white and gray wolf, snarling and ready to protect her pup.

A sinister chuckle came from the being before her, the words he said still haunt me to this day, "You must blow out the candles for your wish to come true, little one. I guess your wish is mine now." Then he blew out my candles. I screamed as the darkness surrounded me. Someone grabbed me and I just called for my mother over and over. I faintly heard Lotus speaking to me, but I don't know what she was saying. She managed to get out the back door of the pack house, and outside an enormous charcoal wolf stopped us. Lotus placed me onto the wolf's back, and I knowing I could trust her, I leaned forward and grabbed around its neck for dear life. I didn't know who had me or where we were going, but we were running far and fast. When I woke, I blinked my eyes open and looked up to see a blood, sweat, and tear covered Lennox. Lennox was cradling my head against him, rocking me, shushing me, and telling me it was going to be ok.