True Love

I remember when I started but I never knew when it got out of hand. My best friends were lawyers and doctors but me, I slept with married men for a living and I was living well. Do my friends know what I do? Yes. Do they approve? Hell no, all three of them are married and have a kid each. I was the baby of our group Janice 30, Ellen 29 both doctors, and Lauren 28 was a lawyer. We all grew up together and never drifted apart.

Do my parents know what I do? No, if my mother found out I’d be in a prayer circle for years. I remember when she found out I lost my virginity at 17 she threw holy water on me and had me praying and fasting for months to ask God for forgiveness. My mother was a minister and my father is an army veteran who now runs a Auto Shop. I’m the baby of the family, I had five older sisters.

We were all named after countries they had visited Paris the eldest is 42, she has no kids and got divorced 2 years ago she and her ex-husband Mike couldn’t come to an agreement he wanted kids she didn’t she lives with mom and dad now.

Sierra is 40 married with 7 children and her weird ass named all of them after the characters in 7th Heaven, they live in Alabama where her husband’s family resides, they own a big farm and produce lemons for major companies so you could say they got money.

The twins 37 China and Japan are both married, China has 2 children and Japan has 4 two sets of twins. They live next door to each other in a neighborhood across town.

My favorite sister India 35 we were the closest, she’s married and has a 5-year-old son named TJ because she and her husband travel so much TJ is with me. Mom didn’t approve of Tony because he was a rapper but who cares what she approves of he loved and took care of my sister so I don’t have a problem with him and it’s not like he’s a struggling rapper. He already made it he always had India attached at the hip and TJ on his shoulders. I only step in as a babysitter if they’ll be gone more than a month and that’s because he had school before he started, they had him everywhere.

“Austria?”.

it’s Sunday I knew I shouldn’t have answered the phone.

“Yes, mother?”

“Church begins in an hour, where are you?”

“Mom I’m 26 years old you can’t demand I go places anymore”.

Did I mention that I was a surprise baby when I was born all my sisters were almost grown?

“Austria get out of bed now; I expect to see you at church today”.She said hanging up leaving no room for arguments.

“FUCK!!!”

I can’t stand that woman sometimes. I dragged myself out of bed to shower, it’s not that I don’t love church because I do and I love God for all he’s done for me but I just didn’t want to see my ex.

Let me give you a rundown of our story. Jerimiah and I started dating when I was 15 and he was 17, he’s the person I had lost my virginity to at 17. We went out until my 2nd year of college when he decided to let my mom influence him to do the one thing, I told him I never wanted to do“get married”. So, after he proposed to me in front of our family and friends at dinner and I bluntly told him no our relationship went downhill. We do talk but most of the time ends in an argument, do I still love him? Yes. Does he still love me? Yes. He’s told me every time we talk.

He’s been married now for two years, his wife hates me and I let her know often the feelings are mutual like girl go fuck yourself. The icing on the cake my parents invite him and this bitch to Sunday night dinners.

After getting dressed, I put on some light makeup and let my hair down. I grabbed my keys off the dresser and picked up my bag off the bed. After closing up my apartment I got on the elevator and headed to the garage where my black porch that I bought last year was parked. I loved cars and I also loved fixing them, I guess you can blame my dad and Jerimiah for that if I didn’t become a teacher, I’d probably be doing something pertaining to cars.

I shut off the engine as I arrived at church stretched over the passenger seat to pick up my Chanel clutch and placed my Chanel glasses on after checking myself out in the mirror.

“I don’t think you need all of that”.

I rolled my windows up, closed the top of my Mac lipstick after retouching my lips, and exited my car.

“Why aren’t you inside Jerimiah?” I asked looking up at him still fine as hell.

“I’m ushering today”.

“Cool”.

“Plus, your mom told me to look out for you”. He said looking at me from head to toe.

“Shouldn’t you be looking out for your wife?”

“I don’t need to look for her she’s inside beside Paris”. He licked his lips staring at me.

“Shocker, well bye”. Yes, I’m rude I know but what he said had a double entre and I refuse to do this with Jerimiah.

I stepped inside the church to the choir singing one of my favorite songs. I know the clicking sound of my Louboutin on the church's wooden floor would make everybody stare at me. I smiled and waved at sister woods her husband was really good at sucking pussy god bless his soul I hope it rests in peace.

I scanned the church to see where India and TJ were sitting but the wave of my ex’s mother's hand signaled that I sit with her.

“Hey, mama”. I half hugged her.

she and I were closer than my mother and I, she taught me everything in life you could say because of her life lessons is one of the reasons I’m not married to her son right now.

“Hey Austria baby, looking fab as always”.

“Thanks, mama you look great”. I smiled looking at her attire, mama grace was probably the best-dressed person in this town.

“I know, have you seen my baby?”

“I left him outside, are you coming over to dinner?”

“Yeah, I’m not in the mood to cook and my man ain’t in town to blow my back out tonight”.

I giggled, Mama Grace had no filter and she didn’t care where she was.

Jerimiah passed and smiled at me subtly but not subtly enough because Mama Grace caught him.

“Are y’all fucking?”

“What? No, he’s married”.

She looked at me knowingly.

“Seriously we’re not”.

And it’s the truth, Jerimiah and I can’t have casual sex without feelings getting involved.

“Both of you love playing around” Mama Grace shook her head.

“He’s married”. I emphasized to her.

“And whose fault is that”.

I sighed.

Mine, Jerimiah begged me for years to get back with him I just couldn’t, I so need a smoke right now.

“My sermon for today is on unity and family”. My mama said clearing her throat.

I knew I was supposed to be up front and I’ll hear an ear full tonight about talking during service.

“As you all know I have six beautiful daughters and a million grandchildren”. The congregation laughed at that including myself because it was true.

“Let me tell you it was hard raising them girls, they argued every two seconds and don’t remind me of those fights. Malcolm and I had to deal with six different personalities, once we learned how to deal with each we worked together as a team to teach each of them how to live with one another”.

I tuned her out knowing this story and sermon already I could have stayed home and slept my back hurts from fucking in the car last night.

“Okay, church I’ll see you next Sunday drive or walk home safely”.

I sat in my chair and waited for the church to clear out, I really didn’t want any of these musty men rubbing up on me.

“I’m riding with you today”.

I nodded.

She placed her aviators on, grabbed her Michael Kors bag I bought her last Christmas, and headed outside.

“Good to see you Austria almost thought you didn’t show up”.

“Hi, mother”.

She kissed my cheek.

“See you at home”.

I rolled my eyes and exited the church to see Mama Grace standing beside my car with Jerimiah and his wife Krystal.

“Mom you can ride with us”.

“I’m not going anywhere with you and this bitch”. Mama Grace folded her arms like a child.

She hated Krystal she said her soul didn’t sit right with her.

“Mom! Stop”.

Oh Shit! He knows that’s a red flag, let me save his ass.

“Ready mama?”

She whipped her head towards me with a scowl, it turned to a smile when she realized it was me.

“Yes, baby let's go”. She said calmly.

I unlocked the doors and slid in.

“Hey Austria”. His wife greeted him.

“Girl bye”.

I slid in my car and drove off, I don’t deal with fake bitches.

“What’s up with you and your daughter-in-law?”

“I thought we were cool?”

I chuckled.

“I mean the one by law”

“I don’t roll with fake bitches”.

“I’m going to make a pit stop I’m hungry”.

“No problem here”.

After consuming our food we headed towards my parents’ home, I parked behind Tony’s car. I headed around the back, I needed a smoke right now if I was going to be dealing with my mom. I opened the garage door and saw Jerimiah smoking.

“Mr. Usher aren’t you scared you’ll get in trouble with the paster” I sarcastically spoke holding my chest.

He chuckled.

“Shut up Austria, you want in?”

“Hell yeah”.

I jumped up on the counter and he passed me the blunt.

“So, what’s up? You only smoke when something bothers you”. I asked looking up at him

“My mom and my wife are stressing me the fuck out, I got an earful about me not defending her when my mama talked about her like that”.

“She doesn’t know Mama Grace”.

“No, she doesn’t, thanks for the save today by the way”.

“I didn’t really do it for you we were at church”.

“But still thank you, how are you?”

I know why he was asking me this.

“I’m fine Jerimiah”.

“I visited her today before church”.

I took a draw from the blunt before passing it back to him.

“I might go tonight”.

He stepped between my legs giving me that damn stare knowing I was going to get wet.

“Are you seducing me Jerimiah?” I asked changing the subject.

“What if I am”.

He licked those damn lips he knew I loved so much, he pressed his body closer so I could feel his hard dick it felt great. He grabbed my neck and bit down on my bottom lip.

I missed having sex with him but as I stated feelings would get involved, so as he was about to stick his tongue in my mouth, I pushed him away.

“Your married Jerimiah not happening”. I jumped off the counter.

I began fixing up both Jerimiah and me so that my mom wouldn’t smell the weed on us. We have been doing this for years.

He placed his hands on my ass.

“Jerimiah no,” I said sternly.

“Baby you know I love you” he pleaded.

“And that's exactly why Jerimiah, too many feelings would be involved”.

“Why do you keep doing this to me Austria? Why do you keep breaking my heart? Why do you keep pushing me away?”

I sighed which to answer first.

“Jerimiah you’re on, you’re married focus on your wife”.

“How the fuck must I do that Austria? I’m not you, I can’t just shut off my feelings for someone”.

“You think I don’t love you?” I asked looking into his eyes.

“I know you do Austria and that’s confusing me”,

I pulled his hands from my ass, seeing the sadness in his eyes is fucking with me.

“Bye Jerimiah”.

I entered my childhood home and smiled at my nephew who spotted me coming inside.

“Aunty Austria”. He took off running towards me.

I picked him up and placed kisses on both of his cheeks.

“Hey, bug”.

“Guess what?”

“I’m going on tour with Mommy and Daddy this summer!”

“Yeah! That sounds fun bug”. I matched his excitement.

“Hey, daddy” I half hugged my father.

“Hi princess” he placed a kiss on my forehead.

“Austria kitchen now”.

I sighed and put TJ down on the ground, I really need to go home.

“Yes, mama”.

“Come help”.

“Do what exactly?”

“Help Grace with the sides”.

I gave India a hug and waved at Paris who was talking to Krystal.

“How come you didn’t threaten the twins to come today?”

“They live across town, they won’t be able to be here every Sunday Austria”.

“Mommy!” I heard a familiar voice call.

Tears were growing in my eyes as I saw the picture on the refrigerator, I rushed out of the house.