Evergreen

Because there was nothing wrong with him.

He believed it so be so. Lucas knew that whatever he had in his pants didn't define him. As he drove over from his dorm to his new college, he knew that these people were going to be a bit more accepting than the kids from his high school. Of course, he knew that everywhere he went he was going to find a hater, but he didn't care.

As much as some people were going to hate him, he knew there were some people who loved him, and he would always remember that when he felt a bit sad, mostly because of his mother who was always there to remind him that. But now, the most his mother can do is give him a phone call, and she won't call unless he calls her first, to be respectful.

But, sometimes, he wanted her to take the initiative because know if felt like he had nobody else to talk to. When he got to school, he sat in his car for a second, trying to take in the atmosphere of his ever changing life. He turned around and picked up his bag that was in the backseat and left the car.

When he stepped out, he took a moment to observe everybody that walked through the doors. There was the wide-eyed, excited freshmen like him, and then there was the lazy, bored, can't-wait-to-graduate, seniors, who looked like they couldn't wait for school overall to end.

He walked into school with his head down, eyes glued to the floor, trying to avoid the students. This was nothing like high school. It was scarier. He knows he can't pull the shit he pulled in high school, so he'll have to man up, and face the music.

As he looks around, he realizes that the school seemed like a remix and mashup between a Disney sitcom and some sexual HBO drug addict producer's wet dream. The athlete's either took steroids or a shitload of energy drinks. Probably a bit of both.

Nobody has this much energy at 8 A.M.

They weren't as much of Neanderthals as the high schoolers. Lucas loved sports when he was in elementary school and middle school. That was until he was getting picked on for who he was and the way he decided to express himself.

In middle school, the kids were unproblematic on whether he was Lucy or Lucas. It wasn't until the hormonal primitive monkeys that are probably gang banging with the rest of their team thought it was going to be a problem.

They assumed that since he was a girl who decided that he wanted to be a guy was going to have the estrogen resurface and want to secretly fuck them in the janitor's closet. He wouldn't unless they really wanted to.

Like really wanted to.

But he liked that fact that he was miles and miles away from his hometown. Now he's in Buffalo, living his life the way he wants to, especially since he heard that New York was one of the best places for LGBT+ community to live.

In his senior year, everybody feared him after some rumor that was going around that he was chopping off guys' dick's so they can be even. Which was totally false and scientifically impossible for him to to without killing them, but, again, that was a high school in the Midwest, of course it was filled with idiots.

But he liked being feared. Honestly, he got the sense of respect that nobody ever gave him during the first three years of high school. It's not like he even cared about the students or whatever was going on.

The only reason that rumor went around is when a bunch of guys with a stack of dimes in their underpants said that he had chopped it off and that's why they had dicks the size of fingers. He wasn't going to let rumors like these ruin his life. There was no reason for them to get to him like that.

Now that he's 18, he plans to live his life to the fullest, starting with going to the summer party in which he and a girl met. Well, not exactly. He was kind of mad that she didn't say she had a dick, but she was surprisingly hung. Plus, the sex was alright.

Alright? You were coming!

So was he...she...them. Damn.

Hopefully she goes to another school or something, maybe you won't even see her again.

Yeah, yeah, because what are the chances?

Well, the chances were very high. As Morgana walked down the hallway, they briefly made eye contact. He tried to look away from her and the equally hot friends she had, both boys and girls and everything in between.

After some moments of walking around aimlessly, he looks down at his paper and sees the class he supposed to be in. He walks around looking for the classroom number and looks inside, seeing the crowd of students already taking their seats, excited and nervous chatter filling the room. He was so excited for the new life that was about to begin right now.

"You look sick." Gina told Lucas as he was sitting in his second class. They had been friends forever, ever since he was Lucy. She never had a problem with his change, in fact, she loved to have a friend who's in with the boys. "You look much more pale than you did yesterday."

"I've been feeling a bit sick, but it's nothing out of the blue. You know I've gotten sick every year when school starts." Lucas says as he scribbles into his notebook, since his stomach ache was distracting him from focusing on the class at hand.

"Oh, so when are you going to tell me about your mystery hookup?" She says, poking him on the shoulder, making him look over his shoulder and smile. "It's going to stay a mystery, G. I know that your going to spill the beans to someone else."

"So you don't trust me?" The girl asks surprised as he rolls his eyes at the dramatic way she asks the question. "It's not that I don't trust you, it's that you're kind of a gossip girl and I know that you'll kind of turn it into everybody's business and I don't want that."

"Fine, I'll respect your decision." She says putting her hands into the air, in a sort of I surrender way. "But, I'm coming over tonight, so that means movie night and gossip." She says as she goes back to focusing on her class.

"Oh, fucking hell." Lucas said as he vomited into the nasty toilet, that looked like someone used it after him. He knew that doing this in the guys bathroom was going to get him caught immediately, so he had to face his demons and start dry heaving into the toilet of the girls' bathroom.

He saw the shadow of a girl waiting for him to come out of the stall. "Um, are you okay?" He voice asked weakly from the other side of the door. "Y-yes. Uh, You need to use the bathroom?" Lucas felt stupid asking the question considering that they were in a fucking bathroom. "Um, no, I can wait."

Lucas felt like he was throwing up since forever. It's not like he had eaten anything huge, like the grandiose breakfasts his mother used to make him in high school, but just the uncrustable and the milkshake he never finished.

Now he was throwing up a lot more than what he had probably eaten that day and the day before. And now he was sitting on the nasty bathroom floor, waiting for the girl who was either shuffling her feet nervously or was almost peeing on herself, to leave him alone. "I-I really need to pee."

"I'm sick, okay? Can't you wait?" He says raising his voice a little further so he can sound more like a girl and it worked. Another stall door opened and the girl rushed in. At that moment another girl walks in. "You good?" The girl asks as she takes a step back from the stall door, after trying to see if it can open.

How many more people are going to ask me that?

"Yes, I'm fine." Lucas responds this time, but with a little bit more annoyance in his voice.

If I were in the Boys' bathroom, they wouldn't be all over me like this

I mean, they will be when they realize that there's a boy throwing up in the stalls

And that means either that I have a disorder or I'm really fucking disgusting

"Ok, are you almost done?" The girl replies with the same annoyance in his voice. "No, I'm not almost done, so you might as well wait." He snaps at her, before bending over the toilet and going back to puking his guts out.

He hated the burny aftertaste that you feel in the back of your throat, and the tears that would form in your eyes at all the puking, like when you would get food poisoning and would throw up all over the toilet and your mom would just tell you: "Take a medicine and go to school" kind of vomit.

He also hated feeling weak, feeling vulnerable. Every girl that would walk through the door would ask him the same question: "Are you okay? Do you need to go to the nurse's office?"

Do these girls never stop peeing?

I mean, half of these girls are pregnant so the probably have a little demon or two practicing to become cheerleader like devoted Nazi's or something

I just want them to leave so I can get out of here without anybody thinking or asking if I actually have a penis

"Don't worry, I came here to do the same thing." The girl says over the other side of the door, her feet gathering as if in shame. Lucas looks under the stall and sighs, "Do what?" Lucas asks in confusion.

"You know, the urge to purge?" The girl says, her face looking up to the nasty metal door, which had scribbles of past student and weird stains all over it, making the blue door almost black.

"I'm not bulimic." Lucas said as he sat down on the floor again, putting his hoodie over his head for comfort. He took some toilet paper and started cleaning his mouth. "It was the smell of the lunchroom that made me gag."

"Oh, you probably sat next to Doug, he brings some really nasty lunches, that's why I try to stay as far away from him as possible. That and the fact that he smells homeless even though he's not."

"Oh, but why are you throwing up anyways? Eating disorders aren't cool or a trend. They're diseases." He of all people should know, after some struggles during his first two years in high school that were already shining through in the 7th and 8th grade, he would feel pitiful towards other students that tried to follow his path to feel some form of fulfillment by being empty.

"I know, it's disgusting. But I just wanna be thinner. I've tried working out and shit but it doesn't seem to work. To be honest, this was my last resort." Lucas looks under the stall at the girl's side profile. "You don't look fat to me."

"You're just saying that because we're having a conversation on the bathroom floor." The girl says as she lets out a small laugh, rolling her eyes at the comment. "There are so many girls out there who are confident with their bodies because they look like fucking models, like Gigi Hadid and Kate Moss and Naomi Campbell and shit. I don't."

"Don't be like that. There are a bunch of people that can be confident, all you have to do is feel like it. Plus, nobody knows you are confident, sometimes you have to fake it 'till you make it. I know they're faking it."

The girl stays silent as she thinks about what he just said. "Yeah...Have you ever liked someone so much you just want to lock yourself somewhere private, turn on sad music, and just cry to the lyrics?" The girl randomly asks, making Lucas frown in confusion.

"I don't really...it's just...well, I....yes." He squeaks out before he gives a concrete answer. "Is this what this is all about?"

"Yes, I like this guy and he doesn't notice me and even though we're adults now and we're supposed to take the initiative and make your voice heard or something like that, I feel...powerless. It's like I'm invisible and when he comes up to me, I just wanna stay that way. Except for when I come home, and I hate myself for not doing anything."

"Story of my life." Lucas says as both of them laugh. Lucas tries not to laugh to much to try and keep the little food that he has left, down. "Why don't you try to get to know him better? Puking your guts out is not sexy."

"It definitely isn't." She replies, "Thanks for that talk, I feel a lot better now. By the way, my name's Roxie, your's?" Lucas nervously opens the door as he sees the girl stand up. "I'm Lucas."

Lucas felt like a fucking hypocrite giving that girl love life advice. He had never had sex until Morgana showed up more hung than an elephant and took his v-card like there was no tomorrow.

What was worse was when he was telling her that she doesn't need to puke her guts out between classes because she was beautiful the way she was. That not how Lucas felt a few years back.

Everybody thought he was weird and never seemed to belong in any friend group because he wasn't a boy by boy's standards, nor a girl in a girl's standards, yet he wasn't even accepted into the non-binary group because he leaned too much into the binaries. He was just, floating around.

As he arrived at his dorm room after a long day of lectures and puking, he threw himself onto the bed, after taking the best shower he's ever had in his life. It just hits different when you're tired.

When he lays in his bed, the nausea and stomach ache seems to settle and the memories of Morgana keep on rushing back. When she zipped open her pants, the perfect balance between dick and boobs was mesmerizing and a real turn on for Lucas.

He decided to try on what he's going to wear tomorrow. When he puts on the jeans his mom got him after he got accepted into school, he realizes that the pants don't fit. He doesn't understand how he's so bloated if he's spent the entire day puking his guts out even if he ate almost everything in sight.

No

It can't be

Maybe it's a period bloat?

With nausea?

And no blood?

Maybe when I wake up tomorrow, I'll have my period and everything will be alright, right?

Shit

The next morning, he wakes up hoping that whatever fantasy he had had yesterday wasn't true. He went to the bathroom to puke yet again. He tried checking if there was blood, but nothing. Only the white fluid for when he would ovulate.

I haven't done this in a long time

Wait a fucking second!

He runs toward the cabinet in which he has all his, um, private stuff, in which he finds the notebook where he had all his period dates written down. Seeing the pattern, and the fact that it's late, only has him thinking about the possibilities.

No

She can't get people pregnant

I mean, she has a dick

Dick + Vagina + Drunk - Condom = Pregnant

Damn it

"Hey bestie, what's up?" Gina says to Lucas as she hooks her arms with him, surprising his as he tries to walk to class unnoticed, trying to hide the fact that he's gaining weight in the mid-region.

"I need help with something but you're going to have to make sure you can't tell anybody about this." He says, trying to assure himself that it's not what he thinks it is. "Yeah, sure, what's the problem?"

"Now you're going to have to spill the beans about your mystery hookup, Luke." Gina says as she takes out the pregnancy tests from the box. "I mean, I can't believe you're pregnant. I wanted to get pregnant first so you could be the uncle or godfather and you messed it up."

"You don't even have a boyfriend to begin with. Plus, we don't know if I'm pregnant yet, I have to take the tests first. Then from that I can determine if I'm going to keep it or not." He says as he chugs his second water bottle. "So, I just pee on it, right?"

"I don't know, I never been pregnant before. I think so." She says as she shrugs her shoulders, earning an eye roll from her best friend. Gina wasn't surprised that he was most likely pregnant, but she was surprised from the fact that he wasn't the sexual type to begin with.

He liked being shielded away from people, nobody could touch him except her and his family, and he had never shown any interest in hooking up with somebody or starting a relationship. He seemed fine the way he was and for him to do a full 180 and say that not only he had sex but now he was going to have a goddamn child in his uterus...

It was too much for her to handle at once. She tried being positive and as non-judgemental as she can considering the fact that they've been friends for life and he in a really stressful situation if you see his circumstances, but now all she wanted to do was say: "Why the fuck were you so irresponsible? I mean, the fuck?"

"Why were you even interested in having sex with someone anyways? I mean, every time I would talk about this boy I liked and how I thought he was so hot, you would just say that having sex is not everything and shit and somehow you're going to be 18 and pregnant!"

"I got drunk and I sort of, like, blacked out or something and next thing I know, I'm in bed with some girl." Everything seemed to add up until the word girl. "Girl? Girls can't get somebody pregnant unless...oh?" Gina said raising an eyebrow.

"Just...please?" Lucas said as the girl sighed. "Fine, you'll be okay? Birds of a feather fly together." She said holding his hand. "It's flock together, G." He corrects her. "Okay, do want me to drop your ass and leave? Because I can do that!" She snaps as both of them burst into laughter.

She knew he had a lot of baggage and he needed a friend to help him through this. She didn't even want to imagine how he would've reacted if he would've gone through this alone. She didn't even want to think about it.

She also knew that he had some problems with the human race considering the way that people treated him. Bullying him, harassing him, it was too much for him, especially since the abuse began at an early age and caused some problems further on.

One by one, he did as the instructions told him to. Peeing on the test, slowly capping it and setting them on the sink. "Two minutes." Gina said as she set the timer and the boy sat down next to her. "It'll be okay, what's the worse that could happen?"

"I could be fucking pregnant. I knew I was stupid for pulling shit like that. What am I going to do now?"

So this was the first chapter?

You like?

So this idea came from a book I wanted to do for a while about a trans man and a trans woman having a baby together.

Ofc, there's going to be lots of drama and considering the topic, there are going to be very strong chapters so read at your own risk.

I plan for this to be a long book and some chapters are going to be a bit long so brace yourselves.

Disclaimer: For those who read Wattpad, I will update it first on that site since it's my main writing site. In some time I will be able to transfer all my books.

This is an exact copy of the chapt