Rayna
All I knew were my irrational fears,
They lived in normal places.
But love is both irrational and hard to find.
Rayna’s point of view.
Another Monday, another day of scheduling appointments and Starbucks. My days had become a mundane routine at this point. But I needed this job, college wasn’t going to pay for itself, I’ll probably be paying student loans until I’m 80.
I was in my second year of school and I was still undecided. I like everything: health, art, science, music, psychology, and business. I never knew what I wanted to be when I grew up and now at 23, I still didn’t know. Maybe I should drop out, come back when I figured out what I wanted.
The door to the entrance opened. A tall guy with dark auburn hair and tattoos walked in. My tongue nearly dried in my throat. He was gorgeous. The most beautiful man I ever saw.
“Hello, I’m here for my appointment. Austin Ashford.”
He gave me a small, but dazzling, smile. Focus, Rayna. I checked the computer. His name was there for a noon appointment with Dr. King. He smelled good, an aroma of after rain trailing off him.
“Yes, have a seat, she’ll be right with you,” I tried to not trip on my words.
Austin smiled again as he sat in the waiting room. I took a much needed drink of my Carmel mocha, drown my flustered emotions. I was only a month into this job and didn’t need a cute stranger to ruin it for me.
Dr. King stuck her head out of her office. “Austin?”
He stood up and grinned at me again before disappearing behind the door. I hoped he had a good appointment, I thought to myself then felt silly for thinking that.
My co-worker Mariah returned from the bathroom. I knew her from school, she was studying to be a psychologist and thought this job would help her learn more about it. She couldn’t intern yet, but this was a good start she said.
“What’s got you blushing?” She asked me.
“Nothing,” I shook my head as if it would change my complexion back to normal.
“Sure, Ray,” she turned back to her computer screen.
An hour later, Austin returned from his session. Mariah’s eyes instantly changed to heart eyes. She was drooling over him too. She had a boyfriend, but who could blame her for staring at him?
He rested his hands on the desk, only to quickly squirt hand sanitizer in his hands, a sweet pomegranate odor filled my nostrils. He had an arrow tattooed on his index finger. “I’ve got some time off from the studio, so next week is pretty open. Does Thursday at noon work?”
Mariah piped up. “How’s the new album coming?”
“Great, we have six songs recorded right now.”
Was he a musician? Hot. My eyes inspected his fingers, no wedding ring. I quickly put Austin down for an appointment for next Thursday at noon before Mariah could do it. I guess I wanted to impress him. “Next Thursday is all yours.”
He smiled at me again. “Thank you—”
“Rayna,” I said, my mouth spasming as I said my name.
“That’s a lovely name. Will you be here next Thursday?”
“Of course she will, and so will I,” Mariah winked. So much for subtlety.
“I’ll see you both next week then,” Austin said before leaving.
“Okay, he has it bad for you,” Mariah broke me out of my lust trance.
“What are you talking about?”
“Rock star Austin Ashford likes you.”
“He’s famous?” I asked in disbelief. I certainly never heard of him or recognized him.
“He’s the bass player from the band My Perfect Pandemonium.”
I pulled out my phone and looked him up. Sure enough, he was famous. The band had two albums out and just finished their world tour. He looked good in pictures, but he was way better looking in person.
“I think he’s single too, but that lead singer is the hottest one,” Mariah smacked her gum. She pointed to the blonde in one of the pictures. “Him. Singers are sexy.”
The whole band was good looking, even their sole female member was stunning. But my eyes kept wandering back to Austin. His mysterious hazel eyes, tall but muscular body, tattooed arms, cascading hair, and oh lord, that smile that could stop traffic.
Even if he did like me, or even Mariah, we weren’t allowed to date because of my boss. I needed this job more than a rock star fling.
***
Next Thursday I was waiting for the clock to change to noon. Even though I couldn’t date Austin, I still wanted to see him, I was allowed to look at the menu, I just couldn’t order it from it.
Since meeting him, I’ve listened to his band and they were amazing. I was more of a classic rock and grunge type of girl, but if they kept making records, one day they would eventually achieve that status. Watching music videos of the band, my eyes would always lock on Austin. His passion would pour out of his fingers as he shredded his bass. He wore ripped jeans that made his ass look tight and amazing.
As if on cue, Austin entered the office, instantly breaking me out of my sexual daydream.
“You’re early again,” I smiled. I hope he didn’t read the lust on my face.
“Always early, never late.”
He looked around to make sure nobody was watching. Mariah had called out earlier, leaving me alone with the secretary work. I didn’t mind, she could be distracting with her long conversations. I worked faster alone.
Austin slid an envelope to me. “If you’re not busy this Saturday, my band is having a show at the Whiskey a Go Go, there’s two tickets for you and a friend. I’d like to see you there.”
Was he asking me out? I knew I couldn’t. I knew better. But I couldn’t stop myself from nodding my head.
He smiled. “I’ll see you there.”
I tucked the secret envelope in my purse. The less my boss knew, the better. I was just going to a rock show…and the guy playing in the band happened to be a client at the office I worked at.
Fuck it. It was one night.
