UNTITLED

1-800-273-8255

It was like the number was mocking her. Like it was taking each of its numbers and throwing them into her face, all while laughing like a crazed maniac because they knew she would do nothing about it. She has sat and stared at this number more times in the past two months then she has while doing anything else. It was like the number knew she had all the best therapists, psychiatrists, and hospitals at her fingertips, but also knew she would never think about calling any of them. It was like the number knew that all she was going to do was stare at it, and that she would never actually call it. She’s known about the number for three months, and she hasn’t yet even thought about doing anything with it.

“10 minutes Halee!” she heard Richie scream from the room over.

“O-Okay..” Halee whispered, not taking her eyes off of the phone screen, more so, the number on the phone screen.

“What are you,” Richie started to say as he walked into the dressing room, but soon stopped when he saw Halee staring into space “oh..”. Richie walked over to Halee and put a hand on her shoulder.

“H? You okay?” Richie asked, care seeping through his voice. Richard Leeman is Halee’s makeup artist. He’s 35 years old with two kids, and had a husband that died when he was 31, he’s also very, very, very black. He is one of Halee’s only friends, and knows her better than anyone else on her team.

“I swear, the only thing you do anymore is stare at that damned phone screen. Is there a secret boy that I don’t know about?” he added, with a smirk. As if. . . Halee thought to herself.

“No. No boy.” Halee said, quickly turning her phone off so Rich wouldn’t see anything.

“I still don’t understand why your fine ass don’t have a man yet honey. It just doesn’t make any sense to me.” Richie said with a smile. I know why. . . Halee thought quietly.

“Is there something gettin’ you down hon?” Rich asked, rubbing her shoulder with his hand. Halee shook her head, not taking her eyes off of the footrest in front of them.

“I have known you ever since we can remember H. I know when you’re lying to me.” He said with a smirk. Halee looked up at Rich and smiled. Richie had married her big brother Ryan when Ryan was 28 and Halee was 15. Halee’s parents, Angela and Max, had actually given birth to Ryan. But 23 years later, decided they wanted another child. When they found out that Angela couldn’t give birth anymore because of problems with her organs, they decided to adopt. Ryan was all for it, so they went into the orphanage and started looking around. The majority of the kids were older, and the youngest one there was ten year old Halee. So they filled out the papers and took her home. That was where she met Richard. Richard was Ryan’s boyfriend of 5 years at the time and him and Halee had instantly clicked. Halee was always thankful towards her foster parents for taking her out of the orphanage, but her and her mother never really got along like mother and daughter should. She was always snappy towards Halee, always giving her extra things to do around the house, and always bothering her about little things she couldn’t possibly do anything about. God bless Max though, he did everything he ever possibly could to make sure Halee was always happy, and he was always apologizing for Angela’s behavior towards her. He really meant what he was saying too, Halee could tell. And one day a couple years later when Halee had finally started talking normally, and getting used to being able to speak whenever she wanted, Max asked her what she wanted to eat. It could be anything she wanted. It could be sweet, sour, salty, or a full course meal. Whatever she wanted he would go out and get, and then he would bring it back home and they would eat at the little picnic table they had outside. Halee always asked for a little bit more when it came to Max, because she knew he wouldn’t yell at her. So she asked if he could go out and get her an ice cream. The closest ice cream parlor wasn’t that far away, but it still involved around 15 minutes of driving. And of course, as soon as Halee said the words ice cream Max was up and in his shoes, ready to walk out of the door as soon as Halee said ‘go’.

“Ice cream it is then, huh? You good with mint, little one?” Max asked her, as he slid on his shoes next to the front door. ‘Little one’ had always been Halee’s nickname when Angela wasn’t home. Halee nodded and handed Max his keys that had a keychain with her name on it.

“Want to come with me? Or do you want to stay here with Ryan and Richie?”

“Ryan and Rich. . .” Halee whispered.

“Speak up little one, I don’t mind.,” Max said with a smile, fond covering his face. “I love you H, be back soon.” Was the last thing Halee ever heard from Max. On Max’s way to the ice cream parlor, he was hit head on by a truck. Max was known for his Harley Davidson bike, so he took it to show it off while he went and got his little girl’s ice cream. Max died almost instantly from being hit in the head when he was thrown off the bike, but in his last few seconds of consciousness he managed to draw an H&R in the gravel. Halee & Ryan.

“Halee? Halee. . . Halee!” Richie yelled, as he shook Halee out of the little reverie she was currently in. She looked back at her feet in front of her, even more confused and upset than ten minutes ago.

“Okay doll. I know something’s wrong now, but sadly I can’t act upon my knowledge because you have to be outside this door in negative four seconds so,” Richie started, pulling Halee up by her shoulders and dusting her off, shoving her towards the door, “up and out you go. But look at me. We’re talking when you get back okay? And remember, you don’t always have to be okay with those guys out there. . . They know when you’re upset even if you’re pretending you’re not. Just give them an honest emotion for once honey, okay?” Rich looked into Halee’s eyes, and she could see a glint of Ryan’s in them. She always wondered why his and Ry’s eyes looked so alike, but right now she didn’t have time to wonder. She couldn’t walk out this door crying like a baby, so she just ignored the stare Richie was giving her and walked out of the room. As soon as the door opened was when they started, the screams. That’s what always hit Halee first, were the almost blood curdling screams that followed her wherever she went. Next was the lights, the flashes that never stopped. All the pictures that were all over the internet, whether she liked it or not, that made her look worse than she already did. And then after that, was all the people that were always crowding her, never letting up. It was like she could barely breathe half the time, but she dealt with it. She dealt with it because she had to. She made it too far to turn around because of a little anxiety. Her favorite part though, was hearing her name be shouted across rooms, and halls, and streets, and arena’s, the constant ‘We love you Halee!’ was what she lived for.

“Halee! Can you sign this?” One voice said,

“Halee! Marry me!” someone else yelled,

“H! Can I be the father to your kids?” a guy screamed. And that was what made Halee smile for the first time since she stepped outside her dressing room. Halee just nodded, and all of the people roared with laughter and excitement, which only made Halee smile more. The security guard in front of her pushed through the gargantuan sea of people in front of them, leading her towards the room just yards away. Ten feet. Halee thought to herself. You’ll be fine. Nine feet. She kept her head down and walked fast just like her manager told her to, until she saw something that made her head snap right up. There was a little red-headed girl in a wheelchair sitting right in front of the building entrance. Her hair was down to around what would be her lower back if she were standing, and she had striking green eyes, but what really grabbed Halee’s attention was the massive amount of freckles the girl had. They almost covered her face, they ran down the girl’s neck and were scattered around her chest, and covered her arms. The girl was holding a bright yellow sign that said ‘My name is Melissa and I was in a car accident. You helped me get through the days in the hospital. . .’ there was more on the sign, but that was all Halee read before she walked over to the girl. She stood right in front of her and watched the girl tear up.

“Hi Melissa. How are you?” Halee asked, smiling as big as she could for the child. But a minute passed before Melissa even registered she said anything, and that’s when her mother butted in.

“She can’t. . . Um, she can’t hear. The car accident paralyzed her, but she also got sick and it ended up taking her hearing. . .” Halee nodded her head, but she couldn’t fail to notice that the mother sounded, embarrassed?

“No worries love.” Halee said to the woman, before crouching down in front of Melissa and making sure Melissa knew she was talking to her. And then Halee signed out the words, ’How old are you?’ With her hands.

“13” Melissa had replied.

“How did you lose your hearing?”

“After the accident I got sick, and my nerves just . . . deteriorated.” Melissa replied, unhappy tears forming in her eyes. Halee was quick to wipe them off of her face.

“Hey, hey. . . Why are you crying babe?” Halee asked.

“You’re song was the last song I ever heard before I lost my hearing. . .” Was what Melissa answered, and was not what Halee expected. But she regained herself quickly, and said,

“It’s an honor Melissa. Hey, meet me afterwards yeah? I’ll have Richie keep you and your mom company. . .” And that was when Melissa started sobbing. Halee pulled her into a quick hug before running back to her dressing room.

“Richie!” Halee yelled, already being too late to go around looking for him.

“What? What? Are you okay? Is everything-,” Richie started, running into the room. “Oh . . . Child what are you doing back here? Shouldn’t you already be on air?”

“Yes! That’s my point! There’s a little girl out there in a wheelchair with her mom. Bring her back in here and keep them company until I get back. Okay? Okay. Love you, Richie!” Was all Halee said before she reopened the door and sprinted back to the entrance of the building. But before she opened the door and went inside, she turned around and looked for Melissa. When she locked a stare with the green eyed girl, she couldn’t help but notice how determined the little girl looked. Halee threw up a hand and waved, and Melissa shot one back. As Halee turned around and entered the building, her last thought was,

“Maybe I looked like that once. . .”