Day Zero
The low buzz of his cell jarred Joel from his stupor a little before ten PM.
It was going on hour sixteen now, and while the soft murmur of normal hospital activity died down, he was hoping to Christ above that it stayed that way.
Nothing like someone flatlining twenty minutes before shift changes, or getting the Code Red that they had an incoming emergency that needed all hands on deck.
For the past...fifteen hours and forty-nine minutes, Joel had been running with normal shit an ER nurse handled in the trauma ward. His double shift now included a roster list of their five PM burn victim, two DNRs that had gone down four hours apart, and three PITA families that were murking everyone's will to live.
On top of all that, the sudden influx of people coming in over the past two hours with wildly spiking fevers was making him think flu or pneumonia. If that was the case, life was about to just get shittier during an already hectic flu season.
This was the first time he had sat down in seven hours and he was fucking burnt.
However, he pulled his phone and had to smile when he saw Seth's name coming through. He felt that pull of immediate delight on his heartstrings before he hurriedly answered the call. "Hey, baby." He gushed it despite wanting to pass out where he sat and flushed happily when he heard that deep voice roll out over the phone.
"Hey, babe. You still coming over after work?"
As if he wouldn't. Joel smirked a bit and flopped back in the hard back seat tiredly. "Yeah. I'm so tired, baby. I just kind of want to die you know?"
Seth chuckled and that low curl of sound was never not amazing even over the phone. It made his libido want to kick, but holy damn he wasn't sure he had the strength to get it up tonight. "Well, come over, take a shower. I made dinner earlier and I'll heat some up for you, alright?"
"That would be, so fucking good." Joel was starving and glanced at the large white clock on the equally white wall and frowned at the tease of slowly gliding black hands doing their crawling circuit. "I have like ten minutes so unless the world explodes I'll be there around ten thirty."
"Good. I miss you."
Joel felt his chest tighten at that one and nodded before saying out loud, "I miss you too, baby."
God, but he did. All the time lately. He wasn't sure how you could miss someone when you all but lived with them but between his schedule and Seth's? It was a miracle it was as good as it was between them. "I think Ben said something about new hires coming in finally, so hopefully that'll help."
"I hope. Just get here soon, alright?" He chuckled abruptly. "If you're nice to me I might even put your dick in my mouth."
Joel perked right up and beamed, glanced around the otherwise empty break room, and pulled his lip under before throwing some sauce into his tone. "Yeah? That would be really nice too. Do I have to move?"
"Mmm, I mean I'd prefer if you at least let me know you're awake, so maybe give me some thrust from time to time."
They laughed and Joel felt that flood of warmth down to his toes under this man's influence. "Love you. I'll be down soon."
"Love you too. Hurry up."
Seth hung up and Joel just smiled, shook his head, and felt a smidge better about his day.
Thank God for Seth.
~
The drive over to Seth's place wasn't too far considering the size of their town.
They were located just outside of Reno, Nevada which was already "The Biggest Little City" around. Hancook was somehow even smaller and yet still classified mysteriously as a verified city.
In Joel's humble opinion, it was barely more than a small town but what the hell? Maybe the county got a tax incentive or something.
Mercy General was about twenty minutes from Seth's place not including traffic. It was actually a pretty peaceful drive to get out to Riddleston Avenue, drive to the underground garage of his partner's apartment complex, and Joel pulled in with a relieved exhale to be anywhere else but at the damned Hospital.
To be clear, Joel loved his job.
He loved his co-workers who worked into the dirt alongside him and even the doctors on his shifts despite the fact one of them was the biggest douche this side of the Mississippi. He couldn't fault Carol's dedication though, or her steadfast resolve to do the best she could for every person who came through the doors personality...issues aside.
Still.
He already felt better just being here.
Joel climbed out of his Subaru, inhaled the stale communal garage's grimy air, and almost skipped to the elevator at the far wall.
He was looking forward to just hugging his boyfriend. He wanted to press lips to the man's, dig his face into the soft skin at the bend of his neck, breathe in that amazing Dior cologne he always wore, and just revel in the perfection that was this other human person.
He stepped into the small space and hit the button for the third floor, eased against the wall tiredly and honest to God, but he just wanted to curl up on top of the man's giant body and live there for the next hundred years.
That offer over the phone was frankly the best news he had gotten extended his way since the last time Seth had offered and he was very much looking forward to all of that.
A soft ding announced his arrival on the third floor, and ahead the apartment hallway was long, with about ten doors total, and hid away apartments anywhere from seven hundred to twelve hundred square feet.
Seth's door was number thirty-two and he had a decent-sized place around a thousand square feet. Because he was so organized and pristine when you walked in it felt twice the size just because...well, Joel was never sure. Maybe the man's sense of feng shui or whatever?
Joel didn't know anything except that his own tiny studio looked at all times like a hurricane had swept in. He just didn't have the time or fortitude to spend the money on organizers let alone take the critical hours away from sleep he would need to get everything in order.
It was a long walk down the hall though. He meandered down the quiet pale yellow stretch of the corridor listening to the hush of the AC unit, the soft sounds of people living their lives behind closed doors, and the mild hum of electronics humming on the airwaves around him. He knocked once to announce his arrival before letting himself into the man's space.
It was always amazing.
Joel looked around at the cream-colored walls with their bright, primary new-age artworks, the lovely deeply burnished red-hued leather furniture, and pale pine wood surfaces and just always felt like he was coming home.
Frankly, he had his regrets turning Seth down when the guy had asked him to move in.
To be fair, it had only been seven months into their relationship at the time and Joel had been convinced that it was a fleeting magic only; that there was no way the guy would tolerate his chaos or schedule, especially once he saw how put together Seth was in general.
Seth was an amazing catch though. He was patient, he was loyal, he was beautiful, and owned a restaurant and bar down on Hancook's main drag. The man had his entire life together down to the penny and walking in to see the man just...God but it was better every time it happened.
As soon as Seth turned from the stove those lovely pale eyes softened with sympathy immediately. Joel gave him a feigned sad face before slumping in and swinging the door shut, feeling like a dejected puppy. "Everything hurts, and I miss you, and I love you forever. Will you carry me to the table?"
Seth laughed and licked his thumb free from Alfredo sauce before he swept over and just wrapped him up. "I would if I didn't feel like shit, baby. I'm sorry your day was a garbage fire though."
Joel frowned and ran a concerned hand over the back of Seth's neck. "Babe, you're like, fevered. Why the hell didn't you say something?" He eased back and now that he was looking, yeah, Seth looked flush, his eyes were a little bloodshot, and his nose was pink like he was coming down with a rough cold.
Immediately Joel flashed on all the sick cases piling into Mercy and his paranoia spiked.
Seth just laughed though and shook his head. "Don't freak out. It's just a cold or something." He cleared his throat and kissed Joel's frowning face. "Come eat, and then we'll go shower and call it a night."
"Seth." Joel pulled his coat off and hung it with worry creasing his fine brows. "Babe, people are coming in all over town with fevers. Are you sure you're okay?" He couldn't keep the tension from his face examining that titanic figure with a worried once-over. "I can run out to grab you some NyQuil at least?"
Seth just glanced back and looked amused. "I'm fine, Joel. If I feel worse you'll be the first to know." He flashed that bright smile and jiggled the dining room chair at him pointedly. "Come on." He sounded like he was coaxing a reluctant cat from a drain pipe. It made Joel's lips curve. "Come 'ere. Come eat Alfredo like a good little boy."
Joel broke on it and laughed softly, shook his head, and just went for it. He supposed Seth was a big boy and could gauge his own level of discomfort. "Just don't wait until you get deathly ill before going to the doctor or anything, okay?" He paused and looked up at the man with imploring eyes. "Please?"
Seth notoriously and without question would push off a doctor visit until he was literally half dead, so it was a valid concern.
He exhaled and then those pale eyes creased before he gave it up and nodded. "Fine. You said a lot of people are coming in?" He queried curiously before turning for the stove.
Joel flopped down and was so tired now he could barely even think. "Yeah. In freaking droves, babe. We're hoping it's not a new flu strain, you know?" He twisted enough to prop his chin on his palm and just smiled after the guy.
God, but even sick, Seth was just...he was perfect.
He really was. Maybe not to everyone on the planet, but Joel just adored him.
Seth was an absolute giant, no question about it.
At six foot six and two hundred and twenty-five pounds, the man was titanic. He worked out hard and was thickly muscled in that manner some men got where they looked massively solid as opposed to lean. His middle was just like a granite boulder, looked thick around the waist but out of a shirt you saw what the guy was working with and it surely wasn't love handles.
He kind of looked like a lumberjack if that lumberjack had crawled into a gym six days a week, and dear Christ, but Joel could have dangled off his biceps they were so thickly corded and stacked.
He was just a moose of a man and otherwise was a fairly average-looking dude to the casual observer. Seth was just a strong-looking face with a straight, slightly hooked nose, a short growth of dark facial hair over that squared jawline, and a deeper set of eyes that were lazily hooded, and a little mischievous looking.
Honestly, Seth's eyes were his stand-out feature. They were a brown so pale they looked like cream with a drop of coffee in the mix and he boasted lashes so thick and long they almost lined his lids like he was wearing eyeliner.
Seth surprised a lot of people when they found out he was gay, and he got the comments all the time about being a "Muscle Bear" or whatever the hell it was. Seth hated the labels because as he said, he just looked how he looked and he was how he was.
However, Joel fucking loved everything about him. Everything.
He loved that strong very male nose, he loved the man's body hair and thick dark smattering of chest hair. He loved the thick natural curls of his tresses when he just left it alone and let it dry as it would, and he would have never changed an inch of the man's girth or height for any reason. That mouth was plush and perfect, and despite the fact that the man's hand could have palmed a watermelon, Seth was the most tender, beautiful lover Joel had ever had in his life.
It was a truth between them that Seth just got more beautiful every single time Joel saw him.
Their friends and acquaintances had always joked and poked over the notion that Seth had landed himself a ten; that he was lucky and clearly had a taste for people out of his league.
While Joel knew that people were joking and that it was even a compliment on some level every single time he heard the comments he had a fit. It was Joel that was lucky and in his opinion Seth was out of anyone's damn "league" and he'd die on that hill.
Now people knew better than to mention or prod at it if only to spare themselves the tirade of Joel on a bender.
It stood that Joel was blessed with a pretty face. He was a blonde with a fit, athletic body, had lovely, almond-shaped green eyes with a bedroom lid, was five-eleven, and took good care of himself as best he could.
To him though, being graced with typical classic beauty wasn't some God-given prize, and sure as shit didn't guarantee happiness or the ability for a man to find some perfect love story.
Seth actually worked for his physique but more importantly, he worked hard to be an amazing partner, a steller lover, and a successful human being in every way that was truly admirable.
Plus he had a big dick, so...you know, eat your heart out.
"Babe?"
Seth glanced back and those honey-hued eyes creased pleasantly. There was never a time when the man looked at him and didn't have the light of love shining back at him and it made Joel's heart flutter every time.
"Yeah?"
"I was thinking about it. Um..." Joel looked down and ran a nervous hand over the chair back. "What would you think about moving in together? It's been two and a half years since you asked me. Maybe, um...you could ask me again some time?"
Joel looked up under his brows and saw that small curve of his lover's lips, those very warm pleased eyes, and almost choked up emotionally.
"You want to move in?"
"Um...I think I do." Joel exhaled and just flexed a smile at him, eyes huge on that forever warm gaze. "No, I know I do." He scrubbed his forehead and was almost tight in the chest nervous about it. It was a big step. "I just..I miss you all the time, you know?" He blinked back tears and smiled warmly when Seth turned to face him. "I'm tired of going to my studio when I can just come back home to you."
For a moment Seth looked down like he was thinking it over before he set his mixing spoon down, and came back over.
Joel braced under that considering look, had gone still to the point of being petrified over what he would say, and for a wild moment thought the guy would tell him to fuck off.
He had to laugh with shaken relief when the man just scooped his face in the cradle of those large hands and kissed his lips sweetly. "I'd love that. I want you here all the time."
That was it.
Joel was a second from crying, bit his bottom lip under emotionally, and had to blink back a sudden upwelling of tears before nodding quickly. "Okay." He managed to keep his voice above a whisper before he caught one of the man's wrists in a tight squeeze. "I love you so much. Nothing will ever change that."
Seth grinned with a broad flash of white teeth, cleared his throat on a cough, and straightened. "I love you too, baby."
That night, Joel Mitterson looked into Seth's eyes and meant every word of that.
He knew that nothing in the present or future would ever change that in his heart just like he knew that he would love Seth Crooks until his dying breath.
It was October twenty-fourth when he said that to the man but that night, Joel had no idea how much that statement was about to be tested.
