What is your opinion?
Appreciation and Commission Request
"Hi! I’m Eloise, a digital artist passionate about visual storytelling. I just read your story and was completely pulled in the emotion, the world, the characters it all played out in my head like a comic. I’d love to collaborate on adapting a scene into a short comic! I focus on expressive characters and impactful layouts, and I think we could create something really special together. I charge reasonably and am happy to share samples of my work if you're curious. No pressure just wanted to say how much I loved your writing and share the idea. Feel free to reach out on Discord: luansousa8287. "
The Hidden Moon
"This was really good suspenseful , waiting to see what Ciera will choose next and solve the situation, and we are still waiting."
A quick, entertaining read, but it's lacking wolves
"The main reason why I chose this story after scanning a few was because it was well written, and it is consistent throughout the story. The story is well written, and the prose is fluid enough so that it is a quick, easy read. The premise was also very intriguing, and I think it has a lot of potential. So far it seems like our protagonist, Ciara, is split between two worlds. On one side there is Finn, who represents the human side, and on the other Lucien, who represents the wolf side. Both of them want to take her to their own side and Ciara has to decide whether she wants to keep control of her wolf, or let it loose. What I've seen so far of the world seems interesting. It seems like there is a risk of the wolf side consuming the human side, and Ciara will lose a lot if she gives in, but Lucien's promises are tempting. The human wolves, from what I've seen, live in a village in the middle of the forest, while the wild wolves seem to roam free through the woods. This conflict between the two natures is quiet interesting. My main issue with the story is that, while I was enjoying it a lot, it reached a point where it was getting repetitive. Finn, Ciara and Lucien discuss the same issues over and over again, using the same sentences and responses. There is also a notable lack of wolves for a story about werewolves. So far, we've only seen Ciara transform once, and that's about it, and we don't really know anything about what it is like to be a werewolf. I think it needs a bit more action and less talking. The story is fun to spend a quiet afternoon reading, but it feels like a first draft. The ideas and the world are very interesting, but it needs a lot of fleshing out, including the characters, which are very flat. This story would benefit from expanding on several parts, such as Ciara's reaction after her first change, and some parts which rely too much on telling rather than showing. I'm sure that, with a good revision, this story can improve a lot."
