Nostalgic
Introduction
We are Úlfrinn.
Odin’s wolves. Shades of the great Geri and Freki, walking between the physical world and the aether. In Midgard, known to its inhabitants as Earth, we’ve become legend. In the grim tomes of human history, we’ve been called shapeshifters, skinwalkers, werewolves. We’ve been hunted alongside our wild brethren, forcing us to live as humans to remain safe.
But we have never been the enemy. That role belongs to Fenrir’s shade. Due to his destructive nature, there can only ever be one Fenris Wolf in Midgard. That didn’t stop the last one from secretly infecting innocent humans for decades, using them to create a new breed of monster known to us as vargar. Fenrir unleashed his army on us without warning, and the outcome was most devastating.
We lost thousands of our loved ones before Fenrir and his abominations were destroyed: packmates, friends, Elders, and mates. Now, we live in fear of being Úlfrinn and living in packs. Afraid of the rare and much revered Alpha gene. Only two decades have passed, so that fear still thrives.
I fear only that our time is running out. We are Úlfrinn. We have but one purpose: to keep Fenrir from altering the prophesized End of Days and claiming victory over Ragnarök, for it would jeopardize the birth of the promised New World.
A new Fenrisúlfr will rise in Midgard, as was decreed by the gods.
This time, I pray we will be ready.
Excerpt from the memoirs of the Great King of the United Kingdom Packs: Conri of Eire, Ulrich of Uig, Laird Séamus McCuine MacSweyn
Firstclan Úlfrinn • Isle of Skye, Scotland
• 19 •
Gera ok Freka
seðr gvnntamiþr
hróðigr heria farði;
en við vín ett
vapngöfugr
Óðinn æ lifir.
Freki and Geri | does Heerfather feed,
The far-famed fighter of old:
But on wine alone | does the weapon-decked god,
Othin, forever live.
Prose Edda (Codex Regius)
Grímnismál (sayings of Grimni) Stanza 19
Chapter 1: Nostalgic
Evergreen tips pierced the soft blue sky so high above; they were practically invisible from the ground. The warm September breeze blew multi-colored curls into Reyna’s eyes as she stood on the sidewalk before a stately, two-story house and her lips spread into a genuine smile reserved for that one special thing in life: Home.
Though it had only been three years since her last visit, the repairs and upgrades were apparent, like a fresh coat of paint and a new roof. The gutters had also been replaced, along with the garage door, which now sported etched glass along the top.
Her older brother, Maddy, had been busy, but he wasn’t the only one. Reyna had been working on her share of new, exciting goals, and she couldn’t wait to reveal them. For now, they had to remain a secret.
She followed the stepping stones lining the driveway and smiled at the planters of petunias and marigolds decorating the porch. After testing a brand new doorbell, she heard the sounds of approaching footsteps and waved at the peephole. The door swung inward with an ecstatic scream from her lifelong friend and sister-in-law, Serena.
“Oh, my God! How? When? Why didn’t you call? We would’ve picked you up from the airport.”
Reyna laughed at her rapid-fire questions as they hugged.
“Well, first, I wanted it to be a surprise,” she answered.
“Surprise, asshole,” Serena reprimanded with a laugh before stepping back to give Reyna a once over. “Wow, you look amazing.”
“Same.” She eyed the petite, ebony-haired beauty and swore she still looked the same as in her high school photo. “Aren’t you supposed to be a housewife or something?”
Serena’s snicker was confident as they entered the house. “No, I’m the best housewife.”
“I believe it.” She grinned.
“Okay, you said first. So, what’s the second reason?” Serena prompted.
Reyna hesitated a moment. “I’ve been in Minneapolis for two days already,” she confessed with a slight wince. When hurt flashed through Serena’s eyes, she quickly continued. “It was work. I couldn’t get away before today, and I really wanted to surprise you guys in person, not over the phone.”
Serena visibly settled and nodded slowly. “Okay, I can understand that,” she conceded, perking up again. “At least you’re here now.”
Reyna smiled and started following her again, only to pause at the sight of a new, hand-carved banister lining the staircase to the right. There was also the addition of a six-foot-long coat rack and shoe shelf to the left. It was nice but seemed excessive for three people, especially when one was only a toddler.
Following her gaze, Serena smiled. “That’s not all,” she said, leading her further down the hall and into the living room.
“Whoa,” Reyna said, awed by a new wood stove dominating the exterior wall.
Double glass doors depicting mountain peaks, spearing trees, and woodland creatures made up the entire front of the cast-iron beast. The crumbling red brick that had worked well enough for the original stove was now a firewall of raw gray stone. It was rough-edged and rustic, doing the room a kind of justice the old one never had.
“Nice, huh?” Serena preened. “It even has a fan to blow heat throughout the entire house. I want to try it out so bad I’m actually mad the weather’s still nice. How crazy is that?”
“Crazy, but it’s amazing. Maddy has really taken to this whole carpenter thing, huh?”
“Very much so.” Serena nodded.
“I’ll admit I’m impressed, but don’t tell him I said that.”
Reyna recalled when her brother had first told her that he was trading his financial calculator in for a hammer. After realizing he wasn’t joking, she’d simply been baffled. Home projects were one thing. To give up a financially stable career for one of the most competitive, unreliable trades was a whole other story. More than that, Maddy loved numbers. He could read, speak, and use math for all kinds of things. Apparently, he’d found something he loved more.
“Okay, where’s my nephew?” Reyna demanded, anxious to see him.
Serena chuckled and headed back toward the entrance hall. “He’s in preschool now.”
“Shut up,” she balked.
“I know. It’s hard to believe.” Her friend sighed, and Reyna recognized it as the ‘mother’ sigh. Then, Serena pivoted to face her with a secret smile curving her lips. “I think I’m ready to have another one.”
“Okay,” Reyna cheered. “Now?”
Serena laughed wholeheartedly and pulled her in for another hug. “God, I’ve missed you.”
“Me, too,” she replied. “Is that where my brother is now? Preschool?”
“No, he’s at work, thank heavens,” Serena answered with desperate gratitude as she continued forward. “Don’t get me wrong, I love my husband, but they hit a dry spell for a couple of months, and just last week, he started eyeballing the living room wall with that look.”
Reyna wasn’t sure what that look was, but her friend sounded like she and the house had narrowly escaped disaster.
“That bad, huh?”
“Oh, yeah. Every day, I expected to come home to find him knee-deep in sheetrock and a few walls missing.”
Reyna chuckled at the imagery but not the idea of her family having financial problems. “Business is picking up, though, right?”
“It’s getting better. Thanks to the crew Maddy started working with about a year ago.”
Serena smiled with a mischievous gleam in her eye, and that was a look Reyna knew all too well. It had gotten them into more trouble throughout their school years than they knew what to do with.
“Oh?” she asked.
Reyna stopped to study the newel post a little closer as Serena started up the stairs ahead of her. It was a knotted dragon head better suited for the keel of a Viking ship than a staircase. The odd choice made her stomach feel uneasy.
“A damn good crew. Just an amazingly driven, hard-working group of guys,” Serena elaborated. “Every single last one of them.”
“Wow,” Reyna replied dryly. “You’re not even trying to be subtle.”
“Subtle? I have no idea what you’re talking about.”
“Not interested,” Reyna stated firmly.
“Are we even having the same conversation?” Serena scoffed. “You must have delayed jet lag or something.”
“From Chicago?” Reyna laughed, shaking her head. “At least not everyone in this house has changed.”
“Oh, now you’re just being mean.” Serena’s feigned offense missed the mark when she couldn’t keep the grin off her face.
The laughter died away when they entered the first room on the left. It still startled Reyna to see all the memorabilia displaying her adolescent and juvenile years. Her childhood bedroom was the same as she’d left it seven and a half years ago, like some shrine to the girl she’d been. A girl she sometimes secretly missed.
But wasn’t it normal to look back on your youth with wistful longing? Regardless, Reyna had already moved on. Her belongings needed to do the same.
“Rey?” Serena questioned the silence.
She shook off a wave of unexpected nostalgia. “Nothing. There’s just a lot more here to pack than I remembered.”
“Pack! What do you mean pack?” Serena demanded with a start.
Shit.
“Come on, Serena, you and Maddy can’t keep missing out on this space just because I might come to visit every few years,” Reyna stammered to cover up the slip. She was going to blow her own surprise if she wasn’t careful. “You want another baby.”
“My husband’s a carpenter, Rey,” Serena reminded her. “Finding a way to add a nursery onto the house would be like getting him a new porn flick.”
Reyna choked out a mildly disgusted laugh. “Ew, God, Serena, that’s my brother.”
Serena fought a laugh, rolling her eyes guiltily. “Sorry, I can’t help it. Come on, let’s have brunch, then surprise Justin at school. It’s not like you have movers on standby, right?”
To keep the peace and, hopefully, her surprise intact, Reyna dropped her luggage next to the bed with a sigh.
“Okay, but for the record, my nephew won me over. And food,” she added as an afterthought. “Really, it’s a tie.”
Serena chuckled on their way out of the room. “And she claims I’m the one who hasn’t changed.”
In the passenger seat of Serena’s white Equinox two hours later, Reyna raked long fingers through her almond-blond curls and tried to ignore the anxiety reflected in the visor mirror.
“Rey,” Serena said patiently from the driver’s seat. “He’s three. He doesn’t care what your hair looks like.”
“How do you know?” she panicked, slapping the visor closed. “What if he doesn’t recognize me? What if he doesn’t like me?”
The latter emerged as a desperate hiss, which had Serena rolling her eyes and climbing out of the car. Reyna scrambled to catch up with her, despite their height difference. She jogged along the sidewalk in front of a single-story brick building. At one point in time, they had all attended preschool there.
Inside, the aromas hit another nostalgic chord in her. She stopped, inhaled deeply, and smiled. Hazy memories of playing with large wooden blocks tried to surface, adding another pang of longing she’d been trying to ignore.
Reyna blinked her vision clear just as they stepped into one of the classrooms. A blur of dark hair and blue eyes screamed like a howling monkey right past her and flew into Serena’s arms.
“Mommy!”
An ache bloomed in Reyna’s chest as she watched mother and son interact in person for the first time since his birth. It was real and not some glossy photo in a Christmas or birthday card.
Oh, he’s gotten so big. How could she have missed so much time already?
The regret was bitter, but knowing she had big plans to make up for it, Reyna reached over to scruff up her nephew’s hair.
“Hey, little guy.” She smiled. “Got one of those for your long-lost aunt?”
Most of his face was hiding in Serena’s shirt, but he studied Reyna from under the curl of his bangs, with eyes too old to belong to a toddler.
“You smell like Daddy,” he decided after a moment.
“Justin,” Serena gasped.
With trembling lips, he leaned back to look at his mom. “You said I could say good things. I like the way Daddy smells.”
“Oh, honey. Me, too,” Serena replied apologetically, but it was too late. Big tears fell down Justin’s cheeks before he buried his face into her shoulder again. “I’m sorry, sweetie. Hey, why don’t you tell us about your exciting day at school?”
Unfortunately, the tears had to run their course, resulting in them hearing all about Justin’s day from his teachers instead. Once they made it outside and Justin realized that Reyna would be riding in the car with them, his interest in her rekindled.
“I saw your picture,” he announced while Serena buckled him into his car seat.
“Oh, yeah?” Reyna smiled, turning in the passenger seat to face him. “I saw yours, too.”
She pulled her wallet from her bag and proved it by revealing his most recent birthday portrait. Justin smiled and started swinging his feet, the heels of his tiny sneakers thumping quietly.
“My mommy has a wallet in her purse, too,” he informed her. “But Daddy’s is in his pocket. Momma, where’s Daddy?”
“He’s at work, remember?” Serena answered before placing a kiss on his forehead and closing the door.
“Is Co-byn at work?” Justin asked once his mom had climbed into the driver’s seat.
Reyna didn’t miss the way his face lit up at that prospect.
“Yes, honey, Corbyn’s at work today with Daddy and the rest of the guys,” Serena answered.
“Who?” Reyna asked.
Serena shot her a smug smirk. “Not interested, remember?”
“Not funny,” Reyna singsonged under her breath, turning to her nephew. “Justin, who’s Corbyn?”
“My bestest friend,” he announced proudly, then kicked his feet more enthusiastically and chanted. “Co-byn, Co-byn, Co-byn.”
“Bestest friend,” Serena repeated with a sweet smile. “He’s amazing with Justin. Just saying.”
“And now you can stop saying,” Reyna sang quietly again.
Serena snickered. “You asked.”
“Auntie Rey,” Justin erupted suddenly. “Co-byn lets me ride on his shoulders when he runs through the house, and Mommy doesn’t even yell at him not to.”
Reyna’s breath caught in her chest to hear Justin call her by name. Even though he’d already mentioned seeing her picture, she hadn’t been sure he’d made the connection to who she was.
He recognizes me! She and Serena shared a wide grin, but Justin’s smile fell with uncertainty.
“Did I say a bad thing, Momma?”
“No,” Reyna answered for her, climbing into the backseat and placing a smacking kiss right on his cheek. “No, bud, you said everything absolutely right.”
“Okay.” He smiled, returning to swinging his legs.
With a permanent smile on her face, Reyna strapped in beside him and learned all about Justin’s life in ways only a three-year-old could tell it. By the time they were pulling into the driveway, though, his eyelids were barely open.
“Right on time.” Serena sighed sweetly, glancing at them in the rearview mirror.
Reyna pointed to the giant collection of red buttons against Justin’s chest. “Can I?” she asked.
“Sure.”
After figuring out the five-point contraption, Reyna lifted Justin into her arms, and he didn’t even stir. Hugging him closer, she fought an onslaught of emotions before shifting him and placing a kiss on his head.
“You’re a lot heavier than you look, bud. What did you say you had for lunch, again?” she asked the slumbering kid. “Oh, yeah? Was that any good?”
Serena chuckled at Reyna’s one-sided conversation as they climbed the stairs together for the second time that day. Bypassing her room, they entered the one that had once belonged to Madison. Reyna laid her nephew in his toddler bed, then moved so Serena could take his shoes off and cover him with a rocketship-themed blanket.
“You just leave him?” she asked when her friend met her at the door.
Wasn’t that neglect or something? Serena gave her an amused look and indicated the monitor with video on the dresser beside him. Reyna supposed that would have to do and followed her friend from the room. There was no baby gate at the top of the stairs. That description was far too mild for the welded, reinforced metal thing on hinges that could’ve gotten a stamp of approval by Fort Knox.
Still, she had to ask. “He can’t get through that, can he?”
“No, Rey.” Serena laughed with exasperation.
“Hey, you never know. That kid is smart.”
“You don’t have to tell me,” Serena reminded her. “I’m the one who’s been scrambling to stay two steps ahead of him since birth.”
Before Reyna could reply, she was startled by the house phone ringing. It was the first time she’d heard that particular sound all day, which had been a nice change of pace. Serena jogged into the kitchen to answer it, leaving Reyna to follow.
“Hello?” Serena greeted, and a moment later, she was laughing. The love and adoration evidenced in her tone had Reyna imagining her brother on the other end of the line. “Now, we’ve had this talk before, Mr. Bruschard. You know I’m a married woman, but you’re more than welcome to keep trying.”
Reyna’s smile dropped, her brows lifting severely as more of Serena’s laughter filled the quiet house. Their last name—her brother’s last name—was Daniels, not Bruschard.
“Okay, put him on the phone,” Serena continued. “Hi, sexy.”
This time her friend’s tone was not only filled with love and adoration but the intimate secrets only a husband and wife could share, easing the curious concern that had begun forming in Reyna’s mind.
More than ready to leave a conversation she had no desire to overhear, a harrowing thought struck her. She dashed into the kitchen and started making hand signals like Tom Hanks in A League of Their Own. Translation: Do. Not. Let. Maddy. Know. I’m. Here. Exclamation point!
Serena grinned, giving her a thumbs up. “Sounds good,” she said into the phone. “Okay, see you then. Love you, too.”
Reyna slumped in relief when the call ended.
“I wasn’t going to say anything,” Serena reassured her.
“Yeah, well, I know your inability to keep secrets,” Reyna replied in her defense.
Serena dug into one of the lower cabinets before straightening and dropping a ten-pound bag of potatoes on the counter with a dry look.
“Good. Since you’re aware of that, I guess it won’t hurt to tell you that we’ll be having company for dinner.” She smiled sweetly, grabbing a paring knife from the block. “So get to peeling.”
Reyna was still mumbling under her breath when Serena dropped a second ten-pound bag of potatoes on the counter.
“Seriously?” she griped. “Who’s coming over, the freaking Marines?”
“Just the guys.” Serena smiled.
“Read my lips: Not. Interested.”
“Again, I have no idea what you’re talking about,” Serena said innocently. “Besides, since your brother started working with his hands instead of a calculator, his appetite has tripled.”
“Really?” Reyna crinkled her nose. “Is he…?”
“No.” Serena laughed when Reyna puffed out her cheeks and gestured a round belly with her arms. “No, his body is just fine. Trust me.”
“Ew, gross, quit it,” Reyna complained, shuddering while her best friend laughed at her.
Once they’d finished peeling a good majority of the potatoes, Reyna took the opportunity to go upstairs and unpack. Afterward, she wandered around her room to recapture things long forgotten, touching items as if they might bring about some epiphany. There were only cherished memories to be found, though. That was probably for the best. Her life was already moving in so many new directions as it was.
Reyna’s promotion was barely six months old, and now she might be moving back to her hometown, so the last thing she needed was to add spiritual insight to the mix.
She plucked an old photo album from the bookcase and curled up on her bed to flip through the yellowed, tacky pages. Reyna chuckled at the goofy candid shots of her and Madison when they were kids, moaned over the horrendous fashion trends of that decade, and smiled at the high school graduation pictures with her parents.
It was hard telling where they were now. Reyna had no sooner left Pine Grove for college, when her parents had purchased an RV and hit the road. They traveled all over the country, stopping at America’s worst attractions and taking tons of pictures to send, along with the corniest souvenirs and postcards they could find.
Reyna smiled just thinking about the random things she’d found in her mailbox over the years. She envied her parents the freedom they’d earned to just be themselves, wherever and however they wanted. Her chest filled and ached simultaneously. Justin’s birth was the last time she’d seen them, and she missed them a lot.
Closing the album, Reyna tucked the pillow under her head more securely and let herself daydream. It seemed like the right thing to do in the place where all of her dreams had been born. It was within those four walls where she’d aspired to become a businesswoman, where she’d written her first love letter and cried over her first broken heart.
How complicated life had seemed as a teenage girl, yet now that Reyna was an adult, she could appreciate how simple things had been in reality. And how fortunate she was.
She’d had a good life thus far. There wasn’t much Reyna could complain about. So, why did she feel so incomplete lately?
