Chapter 1
Celeste’s PoV
“Goddess…” I pray earnestly looking at the full moon above, bathing in it’s ethereal glow and serene light. Praying with all my heart and soul for,
“Please, please at least now, bless me with a pup.” I whisper. It’s been 4 years now. Four long years since I chose my fated mate above all other. Four years since he claimed and marked me his. Four years we’ve waited to be blessed, to hold a little pup in my arms, with mine and Cade’s blood running through his veins carrying a part of both of us.
Four years since I became his,
Three years since Rebecca has given birth to a child.
Two years since Cade has asked me to let Rebecca handle the most important Luna duties.
One year since he has said, he’s fine with not having children of our own. That Rebecca’s child was enough.
“Auntie!!” A little boy’s sweet voice calls out to me. My nephew’s. “Auntie!” He yelled again pouncing on my back, making me hunch forward in my sitting position. Both of us laughing. Him, in his innocent way. Me, through my pain. This little pup’s name is Caleb. Cole named him, meaning big-hearted. Suits him well, truly.
“Auntie what are you doing here alone? I’ll come too. I, protect you!!” He says puffing out his chest. Adorable. So so adorable. One of the reasons no matter how much loathe, envy and anger I feel, I cannot direct it at him. I love him way too much. I pull him into my arms and say,
“Auntie feels so safe, all because our little Caleb is here!” I tell him. “But you shouldn’t come to this dark forest at night alone!!” I chastise him.
“But…”
“Shush.” I tell him gently, hugging him tighter.
“Ookay…” he says grudgingly earning him a kiss. He lets out a giggle and I cherish it. Cherish this innocence and lovely part of him before he grows up.
I think back to when I first heard of his presence on this earth. Rebecca was punished to do the chores of an omega to develop compassion and understanding towards every pack member and not just ranked members. But she didn’t mind. She wordlessly did all of those, not once complaining of the menial labour or the bullying or anything. Because Cole was there for her, after a hard day’s work, waiting for her, taking care of her. She…She’s perfect. Her one year of punishment was cut short to three months for her behaviour.
Some say its impossible for a queen to survive without her throne. Because of their pride and ego and the lavishness they were used to. She proved them all wrong. They say when one’s position is reversed from bullying others to being bullied, they would want to die. She proved them wrong too. She bore all of it and after she earned back her position of Luna, she chose some of them as our close circle.
Three months after, she was with a pup. And me, I was happy for her and for Cole. And I couldn’t wait to hold that little one in my arms. Playing with him, teasing him, teaching him. I was so damn happy that I hugged her tight. The first genuine affection I’ve showed her, since we’ve met. We’ve gotten off on a wrong foot. I shocked her when I did. But she hesitantly put her arms around me when Cole gave her the Okay.
We became real close, real fast after that. I was the one by her side when she gave birth 5 months later. I was the one who first held little Caleb, never loving anyone more than him in that moment. Even Cade got pushed behind in my heart. That was how much my heart swelled up with joy. In that moment and a few others after that, the only thought going through my head was, will my joy and love be double as now, when I hold my own in my arms with Cade hovering over us both?
Three years later and I’m yet to have an answer to that question. I close my eyes as I feel them glisten with tears, to not let them fall. I can’t cry in front of Caleb. I can’t. I can’t let anyone know. Especially Cade.
“Auntie?” Caleb calls out to me.
“Yes sweetie. Something wrong?”
“No… I’m bored. I wanna play!” he whines. I let out a sad chuckle and humour him.
“What does little Caleb wanna play?”
“Not you Auntie. I wanna play with little sister or little brother. Mommy said she can’t give me one. You gimme auntie! Pretty please?” He asked me. And I break. I let the tears slip and sob holding him tighter, all the while begging myself to stop. Crying won’t help anyone. It’ll make everything worse and yet I…
“Aunty! Don’t cry. Don’t cry. I’ll protect you. Don’t cry. Please!” Caleb said, starting to tear up as well.
“Caleb! Go to your dad.” a voice says a little further away. Rebecca’s.
“Momma, Aunt…(hiccup) Auntie’s crying…” he sobs running towards her. I never felt as ashamed as I did in that moment. Not only am I failure, not only am I crying at my failures, I’m even making my nephew cry. I really am…
“I’ll take care of your Aunt Celeste. Go and find your dad.” She says pushing him towards the pack house.
“What happened?” She asks me once he’s gone.
“I don’t know.” I lie. “One moment I was smiling and the next I began tearing up.” I tell her, not wanting to remind everyone why I’m a failure. And also I wanted what we have to stay that way. I like the sisterly bonding we share now. And even if you think logically, I want to stay on her good side. She lets out a sigh.
“Let’s head back. I know everything’s hard right now, but it’ll get easier. I promise.” Rebecca, takes my hand in hers and gives it a small squeeze. I stand up and we both head back. I’ve done enough for one day. Enough messes. I look up to the moon and pray once again.
Please let me have a pup. I do not wish for it to be the next alpha, or a perfect pup. Just one pup. Please…
We reach the pack house in silence but comfortable silence. As soon as we do, Jasmine opens the door in a hurry.
“Luna Rebecca, we need to finalise the decorations for tomorrow night’s birthday party. We’ve set everything up. Just a few finishing touches…” She says dragging Rebecca towards the backyard, completely ignoring my presence. Making me wonder if I’m a Luna in this pack anymore? Not everyone are like this. Most of the pack still love me and treat me with kindness. It’s just Jasmine and a few others. And all because I’m barren.
Most will be wondering. Is a pup that important that my position and rank will shatter if I don’t give birth to one. The sad truth is yes. It’s even more so for a ranked wolf. The pup will be a future ranked wolf of the pack after all. There were cases where, a Luna was rejected and the alpha took on a new mate or he slept with another she-wolf to sire an heir and make the Luna raise him. An alpha’s child is the future leader of the pack after all.
I’m truly lucky to be part of this pack and mated to him. He has an heir. And even if there was none, he would never do anything of that sort to me. I’m truly grateful to have Cade as my mate. The pack still treats me respectfully and if they did otherwise… I’m sure my mate won’t take that lightly. When that happens, I find it hard to stomach. Not only am I unfit but because they are calling me out on it they are getting punished.
Okay! That’s enough. Enough of these self deprecating, sad thoughts for today. No more crying. I open the door to my room to find it not empty. And seeing him standing there, made me tear up all again. I turn my back to him, to hide the tears. But he knows me way too well and pulls me into his arms.
“Cade…” I sob.
“Shhhh, Celeste. It’s gonna be okay.” he whispered stroking my back.
“I’m sorry Caleb said that to you. Now of all times. It must’ve been really hard to hear.” he whispered in my ears.
“How…how did you?”
“Rebecca asked him to find Cole, but he was really worried about you so he came to me instead. So that I can take care of you.” And this just made me cry harder. He just swept me into his arms and carried me to the bed and held me tight.
Held me throughout my tears,
Held me throughout my gut wrenching sobs,
Held me through the night after they’ve stopped.Start wr
