1
I take a deep breath and stare at the sign that hangs on the front of the steakhouse restaurant.
El Viento.
Every Friday, Kellan and I have our weekly date night. Usually, we go to fast food restaurants and talk about our weeks, but at least once a month, we come to El Viento. The steaks are alright, but the potatoes are to die for. No matter how you order them. French fried, mashed, baked, double baked. It doesn’t matter!
But tonight, no matter how excited I am about the mashed potatoes I usually order, something else weighs down and darkens my thoughts.
I step out of my dark blue hatchback and straighten out my floral, blue cottage core-style dress. I tuck my straight, medium brown hair behind my ears and tighten my fists as I try to keep cool. Tears threaten to leak from my eyes once again, but I hold them back with all of the might that I can muster.
A tall man opens the restaurant door for me as I storm through it with a determination that makes his once bright smile waiver. I thank him with a dark grin and continue to the hostess stand.
The adorable blonde hostess greets me with a toothy smile, and I return a less than friendly one.
“I’m meeting someone.” I point toward the dining room.
She nods her head in confirmation and wishes me a nice meal.
The dining room of the restaurant is massive. Dimly lit, with paraffin oil lamps sitting on the center of each table between diners. I scan the dining room in search of my soon-to-be ex-boyfriend. He’s not difficult to find.
Kellan sits in the far back corner of the restaurant at a table for two, staring intently at his phone. Cold glasses of iced water rest on the table, sweat dripping down them.
I take a few seconds to gather my thoughts and let out a long sigh. I’ve only come to the restaurant to confront him and leave. Maybe order a side of those mashed potatoes to-go on my way out.
“St—Sam! I’m so glad you could make it.” Kellan stands up and meets me as I approach the table. He leans in to kiss me, but I feel nauseous and turn my head away, his lips landing on my cheek instead.
“Kellan.” I say coldly as I take my seat at the table and avoid his gaze. He stares at me in confusion for a fraction before taking his place across from me.
“Whatever you have to say, spit it out. You’re ruining my appetite by having an attitude.” His once cheery attitude is quickly replaced, and he turns into the jackass that he usually is.
I scrunch my face in anger and narrow my eyes in his direction.
“I know what you’ve been up to. With Stella. I’m only here to let you know that I’m leaving you.”
“You’re being ridiculous!” Kellan’s brows furrow in anger as he deflects.
“I’m tired of the way that you treat me. This was coming either way. Just give up and don’t try to fight it. You don’t want me. You never really did.” I admit more to myself than to him.
His features waiver only for a second before morphing back into his frustrated one. He’d never been the one to go down without a fight, and I came here knowing that. He’ll resist and deny, just like always, then cry and beg, and before, I’d give in, give him another chance, but not this time. This time, I’m leaving here a single woman, with confidence and dignity.
Maybe I’m being too nice, maybe a little naive, but I don’t hold any resentment for Stella. We were never close, and yes, she knew Kellan was in a relationship with me, but she wasn’t the one who was supposed to be loyal to me. Kellan was. Kellan was supposed to be committed to me, and me alone. He was the one who wasn’t supposed to stray from the relationship. And I’m grateful to Stella.
She messaged me this afternoon. Explaining how guilty she felt. How she originally felt it was thrilling and exciting to be “the other woman,” but soon she began feeling guilty. When I would come in every other day and drop off Kellan’s lunch, how happy and in love I was. The guilt started to eat at her, and she couldn’t take it anymore. So she finally revealed their affair to me. They had been sleeping together for the last 4 months, and, apparently, this wasn’t his first affair. For almost 3 years now, Kellan has had a rotation of women in and out of his office. All of his late nights were tales he’d tell me. And I believed him.
They say hindsight is 20-20; they’re right. All of the pieces finally fell into place.
“I promise, Sammy. Go to the bathroom and clean your face. Take a moment to yourself. You’re supposed to trust me. What is a relationship without trust?”
I hadn’t realized that I had started crying again. But I do what he says and leave for the bathroom. Not only to “clean my face,” as he put it, but to talk to Ali. See what she has to say.
I wipe the mascara that had run under my eyes and look at myself in the mirror. I don’t know what I should think. Kellan is right; I should be able to trust the man I’m in a relationship with. But not this time. I’ve blindly trusted him too many times, and I’m not giving him the satisfaction.
I’ve never been very confident in myself, but I need to change that. I’m too old for these games.
I pull my phone from my handbag, find Ali’s message thread, and send her a text:
Me: You there?
Ali: Of course. Are you with him now?
Me: Yeah. I’m in the bathroom. He’s denying it, of course. I don’t know if I should believe him or not.
Ali: If he’s not going to admit it, which I wouldn’t expect him to, just wait until he falls asleep tonight and go through his phone!
Me: Isn’t that an invasion of privacy? It seems wrong.
Ali: So is cheating! Cheating is WAY worse!
I like her message and leave it at that. Ali is right. And who cares what other people think? I deserve to get answers. And if I have to do it in not-so-honest ways, I will.
I straighten my dress in the mirror and muster the courage to go back out and face Kellan. Readying my acting skills to pretend everything is alright until I know for sure that everything is either all right or all wrong.
I greet Kellan with a plastered smile. “I’m sorry, K. Let’s have a good dinner, alright?”
“Let’s just get out of here. You’ve ruined my appetite.”
I grit my teeth as I watch Kellan stand angrily from his seat and throw his linen napkin on the table. I follow Kellan out of the restaurant and dip into my car.
“I’ll see you at home!” I wave happily as he ignores me and steps into his older model sedan.
When his car has driven out of sight, I roll my eyes. Even if he isn’t cheating, I’m not staying with him. He’s an immature narcissist, and I hate that I wasted so many years of my life on him. I’m only going back tonight to satisfy my curiosity and gather my things.
© 2024 by T.L. Ryan. All rights reserved.
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The story, all names, characters, and incidents portrayed in this production are fictitious. No identification with actual persons (living or deceased), places, buildings, and products is intended or should be inferred.
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