Introduction
Have you ever wondered what it would be like to have the ability to transport yourself to a different time and a different place? To watch historical events first hand, be part of movements or groups that shaped the face of the world as we know it? Many have pondered such profound and unimagined and unlimited possibilities and invented tales and stories of those who could.
What would they find? What, if anything, could they change? Who would they meet, could they influence the past, impact on the future and so on?
Could a simple interaction with someone from the past alter the course of history? Could you for example, in theory, become you own grandparent? If you killed your parents before you were born, would you cease to exist?
No one really knows for sure, well almost no one. There is one person who could answer each and every one of these questions and many more regarding the existence and possibilities of time traveller.
Tommy Treacletits could answer these questions; he could test all the theories: he could answer all the long-pondered questions about the potentials of travelling through time. Tommy Treacletits was, for all intents and purposes, a fully-fledged and seasoned time traveller and held with in him and his unique gift the unprecedented potential to blow open a gateway in science that has long been just little more than wild speculation and fantasy for so long to so many. Tommy Treacletits could be the very answer to so many questions the world has been looking for.
Unfortunately for the world, Tommy Treacletits was a fucking first-class idiot who had no idea how fortunate he was.
To be fair to Tommy he didn’t even recognise he was a time traveller to begin with, he just thought he was very good at fantasising when sexually aroused. You must really understand that Tommy’s first experience with time travel was the result of a routine medical examination at school at the age of eleven. During a routine Cough and Drop examination the female Doctor cupped Tommy’s love pods and gave a slight squeeze as she asked Tommy to cough, for Tommy this was his first ever experience of female contact with his gentlemen’s delicate’s and for a few moments he found himself back home, several hours earlier, watching through the kitchen window as his mother made breakfast for him and his brother who were sat at the table inside the kitchen. He watched for a few moments longer before he realised he was stood in the back garden with his pants down around his knees and completely exposed to anyone in the neighbouring gardens and houses to see. Naturally his instinct was to cover his nakedness so he cupped his hands quickly and roughly over his exposed tool kit and wished he was elsewhere. At that moment, he found himself back with the female doctor, still with his crown jewels cupped firmly in her soft hands as if nothing had happened at all. This had been the first of his many time travel excursions, although it was many years later before he realised this was not just a fantasy world he dreamt up every time he was aroused, but actually the very real and unique ability to travel through time. This is just one of many such escapades he often found himself in.