Goodbye Highschool
So this is the end. This is what it feels like to be done with high school and start my adult life. So they say. I’m standing around watching my family cheer, but honestly, this is not exciting to me, this was more so for them. This wasn’t the best 4 years of my life. The people saying that lied. Honestly, high school was boring and lonely. People had their cliques, but I was alone. No one asked me for my picture. I see all my other classmates cheering with their friends, but I don’t have those bonds. I even gave a valid Victorian speech, and I think only two people clapped for me. High school sucks.
“Come on Sweetie, Give us a big smile!” Aunt Betty is holding her selfie stick high, pulling me in for a picture. I reluctantly show my teeth. Another hand grabs me from behind.
“Betty, take one of us.” My dad is smiling the widest I have ever seen. He rarely smiles but I guess today is a good day for him. Since my mom died, he has drowned himself in work, but I guess you can say I’m the same way since I drowned myself in my studies. Flashes hit my eyes and I have to readjust. I know they are proud of me. I let them haggle me for pics.
“Maybe today will be the day she tells us her university choice.” My dad does a standard fake laugh he does with everyone. I know he is pressuring me to pick a university, but I just can’t right now. I want to tour them. I have never left home before, and I want to know if my university is a good fit.
"Oh come on, Robert, not today. Dont Pester her!” Aunt Betty shoos him away. Betty always knows how to talk to him. She is the only person I know who puts her foot down around Dad. He’s the Captain of the Chicago Police Department, so no one talks down to him. My cousins were already shipped off to college so it’s just me left.
“I’m just saying I want to know where my baby girl is moving to sooner rather than later.” Dad swoops down and kisses me on the cheek. “Mom would be proud of you.” he hugs me tightly, bringing a tear to my eye. Why did he have to bring up Mom right now? Every time he talks about her, I cry. I try to hide my face in his strong chest. Not with this eyeliner. My dad has always been a safe space for me, but I will never open up to him about how I feel since Mom passed. Everything is numb. 4 years of numb.
“Come on, Rob, you are making her uncomfortable! Let’s go eat!” Betty snatches me out of my dad’s arms. She fixes my graduation cap and gown and readjusts my sash and tassels around my shoulders. “There you go, So beautiful.” While she keeps adjusting me, I watch other crowds around me with their families. Everyone is so joyful and cheering. Taking photos with the faculty and staff, too. The only other face I see that matches mine is Ernesto. We make eye contact, and he looks down. He’s the high school bad boy. He barely showed up or was always late or cutting school. They even found him smoking pot in the boy’s locker room. He’s standing there with older men, all wearing leather jackets. Looks like a biker club. Does Chicago still have those?
The oldest man is talking to the principal sternly. Pointing at his chest. I am guessing his father? Ernesto is looking unimpressed. He’s a taller Mexican American with dark waves and mocha skin. I only met him once in my Junior year, preparing for the SAT. We had Saturday tutoring classes at the high school he came for the first class, and we took a practice SAT to gauge where we were and he was the first one to turn it in and then just left. Didnt even stay for the review. I stayed and helped Ms. Graves, the math teacher, grade them after the tutoring, and he scared a 1530! and I got a 1460! he did better than me but never came back to the tutoring sessions.
We are starting to get close to them now, passing to go to the parking lot. People are around watching the exchange. Ernesto is rolling his eyes, tapping his foot aggressively.
“.. I don’t appreciate my son being snubbed for valid Victorian, you know he’s smarter than everyone here.” the man tries to get in his face but he is too short. What? he could have gotten my speech? Hell, he could have taken it for all I care. His father seems really mad with Mr. So.
“Now listen, we discussed this with your son. He couldn’t get the Victorian position with his attendance, and he had no letters of recommendation from teachers in support. I understand….” My father’s booming voice took over Mr. So and he looked so relieved to have some help.
“Is there a problem here?” My dad’s eyes are pointing directly at Ernesto’s dad. His dad smiles at my father.
“oh captain, I didn’t know you were here. What a surprise.” He puts his hands up like hes being arrested in a friendly manner. Laughing off my father.
“Javier, I’m willing to forget I saw you today if you turn and walk away NOW!” his voice deepens at the end and I know he meant business. "Or we can talk about those warrants and head over to the station, your choice.” Dad’s eyes darken and he’s waiting for an answer. Javier looks away from him, smirking. He really thinks he has a choice.
“No need Captain, We will go now. Sorry about the drama, Mr.so” Javier walks away, still playfully smiling at the other in jackets. Ernesto is way taller than his dad, I would say about 6’5, and his dad is 5 feet of asshole. Even as Ernesto hangs his head in embarrassment he is still taller then the rest of them.
“Sorry, Violet, Let’s go before I change my mind.” Dad is visibly mad now. I can see his ears and neck turning red in front of me. Betty grabs my hand and pulls me along. Pulling my attention from Ernesto.
" Come on vi, you don’t want to get on your dad’s bad side.” I can't stop thinking about Ernesto. Is he upset about his dad? or that he lost the valid Victorian speech?
Later at dinner, Dad is texting angrily. We end up at Toms Steak House on North Ave. It’s our favorite place. The steaks are so juicy here. I scarf down my caesar salad appetizer. Graduations are so long, and I'm starving. Dad is usually working at the table anyway. Betty is staring at my dad wearily. She catches me looking at her.
“Excuse me sorry, I haven’t seen your dad so peeved.” Betty starts clinking her fork on her table loudly. “Wouldn’t want to RUIN your GRADUATION Diner WITH WORK!” she is very aggressively stressing her tone towards Dad’s way. He reluctantly freezes and puts down his phone. Rubbing his forehead, you can practically see his grey hair growing by the second. Seeing him on his phone doesn't bother me. We both work at the table all the time together. Dad on his laptop, and me in my books.
“You’re right. I’m sorry Violet, but we’ve been looking for that guy for months and he’s always slipped through the cracks. I honestly should have arrested him, but his son already looked distressed.” he starts cutting away at his salad, too. "but I will not ruin your evening. Do you want to go out for dessert after this? maybe some cheesecake factory?” he knows my weakness for cheesecakes but I can’t. I am a responsible working adult now.
“No, I cant, I start my first day at Barnes and Noble tomorrow. I want to rest. ” He wiggles his brow at me. I know cheesecake sounds so nice but I'm so nervous already that I want to rest. This is my first job and I want to do well.
“I don’t even know why you want a job. You have no need for money all your college is paid for. You don’t need to pay for your car. I buy you anything you want.” He says proudly because he knows he has worked hard for me. I’m mostly home alone while he’s out working, but I need to work on myself. Betty nods in agreement with him
“I know but I can’t put daddy pays for everything on my resume in the future. I need a background in something.” Now Betty is nodding in agreement with me. " that's right," she adds.
“She is a young adult now,” She states proudly, holding up her fork with butter for her bread. She makes it easier to talk to my dad. I only get no’s out of him all the time, and working is going to be a way for me to get out of the damn house during my summer break. I don’t need money that much, is true, but I need something other than the four walls of my bedroom this summer.
