When I Said I Was A Writer
When I said I was a writer,
What I had meant to say is that the words of Ray Bradbury play on repeat in my head 24 hours a day 7 days a week. They are my symphony and the soundtrack to which my life embodies the notes. How it was when he said that writing for him was a physical necessity it was at that moment I knew that truer words had never been spoken.
While he spoke for himself what he didn't realize was that he was speaking for me too.
When I said that I was a writer what I meant to say was that when faced with writing an author bio for myself for the first time I was faced with two issues.
One, was figuring out how to talk about myself in 50 words or less, and if you know me at all you’ll know that that’s asking a lot,
and the other,
was being okay with referring to myself in the third person.
The short answer is no writer is, but I buckled down and did it anyway.
When I said that I was a writer what I meant to say is that I think a lot, I think a lot more than I talk so much so that if I didn't write I would then have to talk a lot more than I already do, and what that means is that somebody would definitely end up offing themselves.
And I'm trying to keep my body count in the single digits, so.
When I said that I loved writing what I meant to say is that my prose is the very air that I breathe. That without it I am drowning.
That it is the reason my heart beats, it is the fire that gives color to my otherwise pale lifeless cheeks, that it is the sun that allows my soul to flower.
What I meant to say is that I can't wake up in the morning’s without instinctively having my hands drawn to pen and paper.
When I said I loved writing what I meant to say is that I am it's slave and my life is literally
a series of anxiety attacks in the pauses between each piece I write to the next.
That my soul is like a plethora of raging waters and it is only ever truly at peace when I am writing.
What I mean to say is that my mind is a speeding freight train going 90 miles an hour and only getting faster.
That my emotions are a never ending rollercoaster and I have words to describe them all.
How my poems are my heart songs and they are the legacy that I will leave long after I am gone.
When I said that I was a writer what I meant to say is that I have loved writing since the first day I learned to read and got to watch first hand as magicians did magic tricks on paper and I knew then that one day I wanted to do the same.
When I had once told you that I was a writer,
and you didn't believe me.
When it happened, I didn't blame you.
I mean, how could you?
At the time, I wasn't doing anything with it.
After all, I had already become too good at blocking out the sound of my own voice.
